CHAPTER III.

 "Memor esto majorum."

Old Motto.

 

"....

All my fears are laid aside,

If I but remember only

Such as these have lived and died!"

Longfellow.

 

Do you wish to avoid vexations? Then never have a Happy Family! Mine were countless¹.

 

Fred could not get me an owl². Lettice did want to show off with Cocky. I had my own way, but she looked sulky and spiteful. I got Tom Smith's magpie³; but I had to have him, too. However, my costume as Showman was gorgeous, and Edward kept our Happy Family well together. We arranged that Tom should put Mag on at the left wing, and then run round behind, and call Mag softly from the right. Then she would hop⁴ across the stage to him, and show off well. Lettice was to let mother know when the spectators might take their places, and to tell the gardener when to raise the curtain.

 

I really think one magpie must be "a sign of sorrow," as nurse says; but what made Bernard take it into his beautiful foolish head to give trouble I [271]cannot imagine. He wouldn't lie down, and when he did, it was with a grump of protest that seemed to forbode failure. However, he let Cocky scold him and pull his hair, which was a safety-valve for Cocky. Benjamin dozed⁵ with dignity. He knew Cocky wasn't watching for his yellow eyes.

 

I don't think Lettice meant mischief⁶ when she summoned the spectators, for time was up. But her warning the curtain to rise when it did was simple malice⁷ and revenge.

 

I never can forget the catastrophe⁸, but I do not clearly remember how Tom Smith and I began to quarrel. He was excessively impudent⁹, and seemed to think we couldn't have had a Happy Family without him and his chattering¹⁰ senseless magpie.

 

When I told him to remember he was speaking to a gentleman, he grinned at me.

 

"A gentleman? Nay¹¹, my sakes! Ye're not civil enough by half. More like a new policeman, if ye weren't such a Guy Fawkes in that finery."

 

"Be off," said I, "and take your bird with you."

 

"What if I won't go?"

 

"I'll make you!"

 

"Ye darsen't touch me."

 

"Daren't I?"

 

"Ye darsen't."

 

[272]

 

"I dare."

 

"Try."

 

"Are you going?"

 

"Noa."

 

I only pushed him. He struck first. He's bigger than me, but he's a bigger coward, and I'd got him down in the middle of the stage, and had given him something to bawl¹² about, before I became conscious that the curtain was up. I only realised it then, because civil, stupid Fred, arrived at the left wing, panting and gasping—

 

"Measter Bayard! Here's a young wood-owl for ye."

 

As he spoke¹³, it escaped him, fluff and feathers flying in the effort, and squawking, plunging¹⁴, and fluttering, made wildly for the darkest corner of the stage, just as Lettice ran on the mechanical mouse in front.

 

Bernard rose, and shook off everything, and Cocky went into screaming hysterics; above which I now heard the thud of Uncle Patrick's crutch¹⁵, and the peals¹⁶ upon peals of laughter with which our audience greeted my long-planned spectacle of a Happy Family!

 

Our Irish uncle is not always nice. He teases [273]and mocks, and has an uncertain temper. But one goes to him in trouble. I went next morning to pour out my woes¹⁷, and defend myself, and complain of the others.

 

I spoke seriously about Lettice. It is not pleasant for a fellow to have a sister who grows up peculiar¹⁸, as I believe Lettice will. Only the Sunday before, I told her she would be just the sort of woman men hate, and she said she didn't care; and I said she ought to, for women were made for men, and the Bible says so; and she said grandmamma said that every soul was made for God and its own final good. She was in a high-falutin mood, and said she wished she had been christened Joan instead of Lettice, and that I would be a true Bayard; and that we could ride about the world together, dressed in armour¹⁹, and fighting for the right. And she would say all through the list of her favourite heroines, and asked me if I minded their being peculiar, and I said of course not, why should you mind what women do who don't belong to you? So she said she could not see that; and I said that was because girls can't see reason; and so we quarrelled, and I gave her a regular lecture, which I repeated to Uncle Patrick.

 

He listened quite quietly till my mother came in, and got fidgetty, and told me not to argue with my uncle. Then he said—

 

[274]

 

"Ah! let the boy talk, Geraldine, and let me hear what he has to say for himself. There's a sublime²⁰ audacity²¹ about his notions, I tell ye. Upon me conscience, I believe he thinks his grandmother was created for his particular convenience."

 

That's how he mocks, and I suppose he meant my Irish grandmother. He thinks there's nobody like her in the wide world, and my father says she is the handsomest and wittiest²² old lady in the British Isles²³. But I did not mind. I said,

 

"Well, Uncle Patrick, you're a man, and I believe you agree with me, though you mock me."

 

"Agree with ye?" He started up, and pegged²⁴ about the room. "Faith! if the life we live is like the globe we inhabit—if it revolves²⁵ on its own axis²⁶, and you're that axis—there's not a flaw in your philosophy; but if—Now perish my impetuosity! I've frightened your dear mother away. May I ask, by the bye, if she has the good fortune to please ye, since the Maker²⁷ of all souls made her, for all eternity²⁸, with the particular object of mothering you in this brief patch of time?"

 

He had stopped under the portrait—my godfather's portrait. All his Irish rhodomontade went straight out of my head, and I ran to him.

 

"Uncle, you know I adore her! But there's one thing she won't do, and, oh, I wish you would! It's [275]years since she told me never to ask, and I've been on honour, and I've never even asked nurse; but I don't think it's wrong to ask you. Who is that man behind you, who looks such a wonderfully fine fellow? My Godfather Bayard."

 

I had experienced a shock the night before, but nothing to the shock of seeing Uncle Patrick's face then, and hearing him sob²⁹ out his words, instead of their flowing like a stream.

 

"Is it possible? Ye don't know? She can't speak of him yet? Poor Geraldine!"

 

He controlled himself, and turned to the picture, leaning on his crutch. I stood by him and gazed too, and I do not think, to save my life, I could have helped asking—

 

"Who is he?"

 

"Your uncle. Our only brother. Oh, Bayard, Bayard!"

 

"Is he dead?"

 

He nodded, speechless; but somehow I could not forbear.

 

"What did he die of?"

 

"Of unselfishness. He died—for others."

 

"Then he was a hero? That's what he looks like. I am glad he is my godfather. Dear Uncle Pat, do tell me all about it."

 

"Not now—hereafter. Nephew, any man—with [276]the heart of man and not of a mouse—is more likely than not to behave well at a pinch; but no man who is habitually³⁰ selfish can be sure that he will, when the choice comes sharp between his own life and the lives of others. The impulse of a supreme³¹ moment only focusses the habits and customs of a man's soul. The supreme moment may never come, but habits and customs mould us from the cradle to the grave. His were early disciplined by our dear mother, and he bettered her teaching. Strong for the weak, wise for the foolish—tender for the hard—gracious for the surly—good for the evil. Oh, my brother, without fear and without reproach! Speak across the grave, and tell your sister's son that vice³² and cowardice³³ become alike impossible to a man who has never—cradled in selfishness, and made callous³⁴ by custom—learned to pamper³⁵ himself at the expense of others!"

 

I waited a little before I asked—

 

"Were you with him when he died?"

 

"I was."

 

"Poor Uncle Patrick! What did you do?"

 

He pegged away to the sofa, and threw himself on it.

 

"Played the fool. Broke an arm and a thigh³⁶, and damaged my spine³⁷, and—lived. Here rest the mortal remains³⁸."

 

[277]

 

And for the next ten minutes, he mocked himself, as he only can.

 

One does not like to be outdone by an uncle, even by such an uncle; but it is not very easy to learn to live like Godfather Bayard.

 

Sometimes I wish my grandmother had not brought up her sons to such a very high pitch, and sometimes I wish my mother had let that unlucky name become extinct in the family, or that I might adopt my nickname. One could live up to Backyard easily enough. It seems to suit being grumpy and tyrannical, and seeing no further than one's own nose, so well.

 

But I do try to learn unselfishness; though I sometimes think it would be quite as easy for the owl to learn to respect the independence of a mouse, or a cat to be forbearing with a sparrow!

 

I certainly get on better with the others than I used to do; and I have some hopes that even my father's godmother is not finally estranged³⁹ through my fault.

 

Uncle Patrick went to call on her whilst he was with us. She is very fond of "that amusing Irishman with the crutch," as she calls him; and my father says he'll swear Uncle Patrick entertained her [278]mightily with my unlucky entertainment, and that she was as pleased as Punch that her cockatoo was in the thick of it.

 

I am afraid it is too true; and the idea made me so hot, that if I had known she was really coming to call on us again, I should certainly have kept out of the way. But when Uncle Patrick said, "If the yellow chariot rolls this way again, Bayard, ye need not be pursuing these arch?ological revivals⁴⁰ of yours in a too early English costume," I thought it was only his chaff⁴¹. But she did come.

 

I was pegging⁴² out the new gardens for the little ones. We were all there, and when she turned her eye over us (just like a cockatoo), and said, in a company voice—

 

"What a happy little family!"

 

I could hardly keep my countenance⁴³, and I heard Edward choking in Benjamin's fur, where he had hidden his face.

 

But Lettice never moved a muscle. She clasped her hands, and put her head on one side, and said—in her company voice—"But you know brother Bayard is so good to us now, and that is why we are such A HAPPY FAMILY."

The End

1 countless   

adj.无数的，多得不计其数的

参考例句：

• In the war countless innocent people lost their lives.在这场战争中无数无辜的人丧失了性命。
• I've told you countless times.我已经告诉你无数遍了。

2 owl   

n.猫头鹰，枭

参考例句：

• Her new glasses make her look like an owl.她的新眼镜让她看上去像只猫头鹰。
• I'm a night owl and seldom go to bed until after midnight.我睡得很晚，经常半夜后才睡觉。

3 magpie   

n.喜欢收藏物品的人，喜鹊，饶舌者

参考例句：

• Now and then a magpie would call.不时有喜鹊的叫声。
• This young man is really a magpie.这个年轻人真是饶舌。

4 hop   

n.单脚跳，跳跃；vi.单脚跳，跳跃；着手做某事；vt.跳跃，跃过

参考例句：

• The children had a competition to see who could hop the fastest.孩子们举行比赛，看谁单足跳跃最快。
• How long can you hop on your right foot?你用右脚能跳多远？

5 dozed   

v.打盹儿，打瞌睡( doze的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• He boozed till daylight and dozed into the afternoon. 他喝了个通霄，昏沉沉地一直睡到下午。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》
• I dozed off during the soporific music. 我听到这催人入睡的音乐，便不知不觉打起盹儿来了。 来自《简明英汉词典》

6 mischief   

n.损害，伤害，危害；恶作剧，捣蛋，胡闹

参考例句：

• Nobody took notice of the mischief of the matter. 没有人注意到这件事情所带来的危害。
• He seems to intend mischief.看来他想捣蛋。

7 malice   

n.恶意，怨恨，蓄意；[律]预谋

参考例句：

• I detected a suggestion of malice in his remarks.我觉察出他说的话略带恶意。
• There was a strong current of malice in many of his portraits.他的许多肖像画中都透着一股强烈的怨恨。

8 catastrophe   

n.大灾难，大祸

参考例句：

• I owe it to you that I survived the catastrophe.亏得你我才大难不死。
• This is a catastrophe beyond human control.这是一场人类无法控制的灾难。

9 impudent   

adj.鲁莽的，卑鄙的，厚颜无耻的

参考例句：

• She's tolerant toward those impudent colleagues.她对那些无礼的同事采取容忍的态度。
• The teacher threatened to kick the impudent pupil out of the room.老师威胁着要把这无礼的小学生撵出教室。

10 chattering   

n. （机器振动发出的）咔嗒声，(鸟等)鸣，啁啾 adj. 喋喋不休的，啾啾声的 动词chatter的现在分词形式

参考例句：

• The teacher told the children to stop chattering in class. 老师叫孩子们在课堂上不要叽叽喳喳讲话。
• I was so cold that my teeth were chattering. 我冷得牙齿直打战。

11 nay   

adv.不；n.反对票，投反对票者

参考例句：

• He was grateful for and proud of his son's remarkable,nay,unique performance.他为儿子出色的，不，应该是独一无二的表演心怀感激和骄傲。
• Long essays,nay,whole books have been written on this.许多长篇大论的文章，不，应该说是整部整部的书都是关于这件事的。

12 bawl   

v.大喊大叫，大声地喊，咆哮

参考例句：

• You don't have to bawl out like that. Eeverybody can hear you.你不必这样大声喊叫，大家都能听见你。
• Your mother will bawl you out when she sees this mess.当你母亲看到这混乱的局面时她会责骂你的。

13 spoke   

n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说

参考例句：

• They sourced the spoke nuts from our company.他们的轮辐螺帽是从我们公司获得的。
• The spokes of a wheel are the bars that connect the outer ring to the centre.辐条是轮子上连接外圈与中心的条棒。

14 plunging   

adj.跳进的，突进的v.颠簸( plunge的现在分词 )；暴跌；骤降；突降

参考例句：

• War broke out again, plunging the people into misery and suffering. 战祸复发，生灵涂炭。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• He is plunging into an abyss of despair. 他陷入了绝望的深渊。 来自《简明英汉词典》

15 crutch   

n.T字形拐杖；支持，依靠，精神支柱

参考例句：

• Her religion was a crutch to her when John died.约翰死后，她在精神上依靠宗教信仰支撑住自己。
• He uses his wife as a kind of crutch because of his lack of confidence.他缺乏自信心，总把妻子当作主心骨。

16 peals   

n.（声音大而持续或重复的）洪亮的响声( peal的名词复数 )；隆隆声；洪亮的钟声；钟乐v.（使）（钟等）鸣响，（雷等）发出隆隆声( peal的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• She burst into peals of laughter. 她忽然哈哈大笑起来。
• She went into fits/peals of laughter. 她发出阵阵笑声。 来自辞典例句

17 woes   

困境( woe的名词复数 )； 悲伤； 我好苦哇； 某人就要倒霉

参考例句：

• Thanks for listening to my woes. 谢谢您听我诉说不幸的遭遇。
• She has cried the blues about its financial woes. 对于经济的困难她叫苦不迭。

18 peculiar   

adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的

参考例句：

• He walks in a peculiar fashion.他走路的样子很奇特。
• He looked at me with a very peculiar expression.他用一种很奇怪的表情看着我。

19 armour   

（=armor）n.盔甲；装甲部队

参考例句：

• His body was encased in shining armour.他全身披着明晃晃的甲胄。
• Bulletproof cars sheathed in armour.防弹车护有装甲。

20 sublime   

adj.崇高的，伟大的；极度的，不顾后果的

参考例句：

• We should take some time to enjoy the sublime beauty of nature.我们应该花些时间去欣赏大自然的壮丽景象。
• Olympic games play as an important arena to exhibit the sublime idea.奥运会，就是展示此崇高理念的重要舞台。

21 audacity   

n.大胆，卤莽，无礼

参考例句：

• He had the audacity to ask for an increase in salary.他竟然厚着脸皮要求增加薪水。
• He had the audacity to pick pockets in broad daylight.他竟敢在光天化日之下掏包。

22 wittiest   

机智的，言辞巧妙的，情趣横生的( witty的最高级 )

参考例句：

• One of the wittiest exemplars of the technique was M. C. Escher. 最为巧妙地运用那种技巧的一个典型人物就是M.C.埃舍尔。 来自柯林斯例句

23 isles   

岛( isle的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• the geology of the British Isles 不列颠群岛的地质
• The boat left for the isles. 小船驶向那些小岛。

24 pegged   

v.用夹子或钉子固定( peg的过去式和过去分词 )；使固定在某水平

参考例句：

• They pegged their tent down. 他们钉好了账篷。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• She pegged down the stairs. 她急忙下楼。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

25 revolves   

v.（使）旋转( revolve的第三人称单数 )；细想

参考例句：

• The earth revolves both round the sun and on its own axis. 地球既公转又自转。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• Thus a wheel revolves on its axle. 于是，轮子在轴上旋转。 来自《简明英汉词典》

26 axis   

n.轴，轴线，中心线；坐标轴，基准线

参考例句：

• The earth's axis is the line between the North and South Poles.地轴是南北极之间的线。
• The axis of a circle is its diameter.圆的轴线是其直径。

27 maker   

n.制造者，制造商

参考例句：

• He is a trouble maker，You must be distant with him.他是个捣蛋鬼，你不要跟他在一起。
• A cabinet maker must be a master craftsman.家具木工必须是技艺高超的手艺人。

28 eternity   

n.不朽，来世；永恒，无穷

参考例句：

• The dull play seemed to last an eternity.这场乏味的剧似乎演个没完没了。
• Finally,Ying Tai and Shan Bo could be together for all of eternity.英台和山伯终能双宿双飞，永世相随。

29 sob   

n.空间轨道的轰炸机；呜咽，哭泣

参考例句：

• The child started to sob when he couldn't find his mother.孩子因找不到他妈妈哭了起来。
• The girl didn't answer,but continued to sob with her head on the table.那个女孩不回答，也不抬起头来。她只顾低声哭着。

30 habitually   

ad.习惯地，通常地

参考例句：

• The pain of the disease caused him habitually to furrow his brow. 病痛使他习惯性地紧皱眉头。
• Habitually obedient to John, I came up to his chair. 我已经习惯于服从约翰，我来到他的椅子跟前。

31 supreme   

adj.极度的，最重要的；至高的，最高的

参考例句：

• It was the supreme moment in his life.那是他一生中最重要的时刻。
• He handed up the indictment to the supreme court.他把起诉书送交最高法院。

32 vice   

n.坏事；恶习；[pl.]台钳，老虎钳；adj.副的

参考例句：

• He guarded himself against vice.他避免染上坏习惯。
• They are sunk in the depth of vice.他们堕入了罪恶的深渊。

33 cowardice   

n.胆小，怯懦

参考例句：

• His cowardice reflects on his character.他的胆怯对他的性格带来不良影响。
• His refusal to help simply pinpointed his cowardice.他拒绝帮助正显示他的胆小。

34 callous   

adj.无情的，冷淡的，硬结的，起老茧的

参考例句：

• He is callous about the safety of his workers.他对他工人的安全毫不关心。
• She was selfish,arrogant and often callous.她自私傲慢，而且往往冷酷无情。

35 pamper   

v.纵容，过分关怀

参考例句：

• Don't pamper your little daughter.别把你的小女儿娇坏了！
• You need to pamper yourself and let your charm come through.你需要对自己放纵一些来表现你的魅力。

36 thigh   

n.大腿；股骨

参考例句：

• He is suffering from a strained thigh muscle.他的大腿肌肉拉伤了，疼得很。
• The thigh bone is connected to the hip bone.股骨连着髋骨。

37 spine   

n.脊柱，脊椎；(动植物的)刺；书脊

参考例句：

• He broke his spine in a fall from a horse.他从马上跌下摔断了脊梁骨。
• His spine developed a slight curve.他的脊柱有点弯曲。

38 remains   

n.剩余物，残留物；遗体，遗迹

参考例句：

• He ate the remains of food hungrily.他狼吞虎咽地吃剩余的食物。
• The remains of the meal were fed to the dog.残羹剩饭喂狗了。

39 estranged   

adj.疏远的，分离的

参考例句：

• He became estranged from his family after the argument.那场争吵后他便与家人疏远了。
• The argument estranged him from his brother.争吵使他同他的兄弟之间的关系疏远了。

40 revivals   

n.复活( revival的名词复数 )；再生；复兴；（老戏多年后）重新上演

参考例句：

• She adored parades, lectures, conventions, camp meetings, church revivals-in fact every kind of dissipation. 她最喜欢什么游行啦、演讲啦、开大会啦、营火会啦、福音布道会啦--实际上各种各样的娱乐。 来自辞典例句
• The history of art is the history of revivals. 艺术的历史就是复兴的历史。 来自互联网

41 chaff   

v.取笑，嘲笑；n.谷壳

参考例句：

• I didn't mind their chaff.我不在乎他们的玩笑。
• Old birds are not caught with chaff.谷糠难诱老雀。

42 pegging   

n.外汇钉住，固定证券价格v.用夹子或钉子固定( peg的现在分词 )；使固定在某水平

参考例句：

• To write a novel,one must keep pegging away at it consistently. 要写小说，必须不断辛勤劳动。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• She was pegging the clothes out on the line to dry. 她正在把衣服夹在晒衣绳上晾干。 来自辞典例句

43 countenance   

n.脸色，面容；面部表情；vt.支持，赞同

参考例句：

• At the sight of this photograph he changed his countenance.他一看见这张照片脸色就变了。
• I made a fierce countenance as if I would eat him alive.我脸色恶狠狠地，仿佛要把他活生生地吞下去。