The appeal was evidently addressed to the Lord Chancellor2, who instantly replied, in a shrill3 monotone, like a little boy repeating the alphabet, “As I was remarking, your Sub-Excellency, this portentous4 movement—”
“You began too soon!” the other interrupted, scarcely able to restrain himself to a whisper, so great was his excitement. “He couldn't have heard you. Begin again!” “As I was remarking,” chanted the obedient Lord Chancellor, “this portentous movement has already assumed the dimensions of a Revolution!”
“And what are the dimensions of a Revolution?” The voice was genial5 and mellow6, and the face of the tall dignified7 old man, who had just entered the room, leading Sylvie by the hand, and with Bruno riding triumphantly8 on his shoulder, was too noble and gentle to have scared a less guilty man: but the Lord Chancellor turned pale instantly, and could hardly articulate the words “The dimensions your—your High Excellency? I—I—scarcely comprehend!”
“Well, the length, breadth, and thickness, if you like it better!” And the old man smiled, half-contemptuously.
The Lord Chancellor recovered himself with a great effort, and pointed10 to the open window. “If your High Excellency will listen for a moment to the shouts of the exasperated11 populace—” (“of the exasperated populace!” the Sub-Warden repeated in a louder tone, as the Lord Chancellor, being in a state of abject12 terror, had dropped almost into a whisper) “—you will understand what it is they want.”
And at that moment there surged into the room a hoarse13 confused cry, in which the only clearly audible words were “Less—bread—More—taxes!” The old man laughed heartily14. “What in the world—” he was beginning: but the Chancellor heard him not. “Some mistake!” he muttered, hurrying to the window, from which he shortly returned with an air of relief. “Now listen!” he exclaimed, holding up his hand impressively. And now the words came quite distinctly, and with the regularity15 of the ticking of a clock, “More—bread—Less taxes!'”
“More bread!” the Warden repeated in astonishment16. “Why, the new Government Bakery was opened only last week, and I gave orders to sell the bread at cost-price during the present scarcity17! What can they expect more?”
“The Bakery's closed, y'reince!” the Chancellor said, more loudly and clearly than he had spoken yet. He was emboldened19 by the consciousness that here, at least, he had evidence to produce: and he placed in the Warden's hands a few printed notices, that were lying ready, with some open ledgers20, on a side-table.
“Yes, yes, I see!” the Warden muttered, glancing carelessly through them. “Order countermanded21 by my brother, and supposed to be my doing! Rather sharp practice! It's all right!” he added in a louder tone. “My name is signed to it: so I take it on myself. But what do they mean by 'Less Taxes'? How can they be less? I abolished the last of them a month ago!”
“It's been put on again, y'reince, and by y'reince's own orders!”, and other printed notices were submitted for inspection22.
The Warden, whilst looking them over, glanced once or twice at the Sub-Warden, who had seated himself before one of the open ledgers, and was quite absorbed in adding it up; but he merely repeated “It's all right. I accept it as my doing.”
“And they do say,” the Chancellor went on sheepishly—looking much more like a convicted thief than an Officer of State, “that a change of Government, by the abolition23 of the Sub-Warden—-I mean,” he hastily added, on seeing the Warden's look of astonishment, “the abolition of the office of Sub-Warden, and giving the present holder24 the right to act as Vice25-Warden whenever the Warden is absent—would appease26 all this seedling27 discontent I mean,” he added, glancing at a paper he held in his hand, “all this seething28 discontent!”
“For fifteen years,” put in a deep but very harsh voice, “my husband has been acting29 as Sub-Warden. It is too long! It is much too long!” My Lady was a vast creature at all times: but, when she frowned and folded her arms, as now, she looked more gigantic than ever, and made one try to fancy what a haystack would look like, if out of temper.
“He would distinguish himself as a Vice!” my Lady proceeded, being far too stupid to see the double meaning of her words. “There has been no such Vice in Outland for many a long year, as he would be!”
My Lady stamped, which was undignified: and snorted, which was ungraceful. “This is no jesting matter!” she bellowed31.
“I will consult my brother,” said the Warden. “Brother!”
“—and seven makes a hundred and ninety-four, which is sixteen and two-pence,” the Sub-Warden replied. “Put down two and carry sixteen.”
The Chancellor raised his hands and eyebrows32, lost in admiration33. “Such a man of business!” he murmured.
“Brother, could I have a word with you in my Study?” the Warden said in a louder tone. The Sub-Warden rose with alacrity34, and the two left the room together.
My Lady turned to the Professor, who had uncovered the urn9, and was taking its temperature with his pocket-thermometer. “Professor!” she began, so loudly and suddenly that even Uggug, who had gone to sleep in his chair, left off snoring and opened one eye. The Professor pocketed his thermometer in a moment, clasped his hands, and put his head on one side with a meek35 smile.
“You were teaching my son before breakfast, I believe?” my Lady loftily remarked. “I hope he strikes you as having talent?”
“Oh, very much so indeed, my Lady!” the Professor hastily replied, unconsciously rubbing his ear, while some painful recollection seemed to cross his mind. “I was very forcibly struck by His Magnificence, I assure you!”
“He is a charming boy!” my Lady exclaimed. “Even his snores are more musical than those of other boys!”
If that were so, the Professor seemed to think, the snores of other boys must be something too awful to be endured: but he was a cautious man, and he said nothing.
“And he's so clever!” my Lady continued. “No one will enjoy your Lecture more by the way, have you fixed36 the time for it yet? You've never given one, you know: and it was promised years ago, before you—
“Yes, yes, my Lady, I know! Perhaps next Tuesday or Tuesday week—”
“That will do very well,” said my Lady, graciously. “Of course you will let the Other Professor lecture as well?”
“I think not, my Lady?” the Professor said with some hesitation37. “You see, he always stands with his back to the audience. It does very well for reciting; but for lecturing—”
“You are quite right,” said my Lady. “And, now I come to think of it, there would hardly be time for more than one Lecture. And it will go off all the better, if we begin with a Banquet, and a Fancy-dress Ball—”
“It will indeed!” the Professor cried, with enthusiasm.
“I shall come as a Grass-hopper,” my Lady calmly proceeded. “What shall you come as, Professor?”
The Professor smiled feebly. “I shall come as—as early as I can, my Lady!”
“You mustn't come in before the doors are opened,” said my Lady.
“I ca'n't,” said the Professor. “Excuse me a moment. As this is Lady Sylvie's birthday, I would like to—” and he rushed away.
Bruno began feeling in his pockets, looking more and more melancholy38 as he did so: then he put his thumb in his mouth, and considered for a minute: then he quietly left the room.
He had hardly done so before the Professor was back again, quite out of breath. “Wishing you many happy returns of the day, my dear child!” he went on, addressing the smiling little girl, who had run to meet him. “Allow me to give you a birthday-present. It's a second-hand39 pincushion, my dear. And it only cost fourpence-halfpenny!”
“And the pins they gave me for nothing!” the Professor added in high glee. “Fifteen of 'em, and only one bent41!”
“I'll make the bent one into a hook!” said Sylvie. “To catch Bruno with, when he runs away from his lessons!”
“You ca'n't guess what my present is!” said Uggug, who had taken the butter-dish from the table, and was standing42 behind her, with a wicked leer on his face.
“No, I ca'n't guess,” Sylvie said without looking up. She was still examining the Professor's pincushion.
“It's this!” cried the bad boy, exultingly43, as he emptied the dish over her, and then, with a grin of delight at his own cleverness, looked round for applause.
Sylvie coloured crimson44, as she shook off the butter from her frock: but she kept her lips tight shut, and walked away to the window, where she stood looking out and trying to recover her temper.
Uggug's triumph was a very short one: the Sub-Warden had returned, just in time to be a witness of his dear child's playfulness, and in another moment a skilfully-applied box on the ear had changed the grin of delight into a howl of pain.
“My darling!” cried his mother, enfolding him in her fat arms. “Did they box his ears for nothing? A precious pet!”
“It's not for nothing!” growled45 the angry father. “Are you aware, Madam, that I pay the house-bills, out of a fixed annual sum? The loss of all that wasted butter falls on me! Do you hear, Madam!”
“Hold your tongue, Sir!” My Lady spoke18 very quietly—almost in a whisper. But there was something in her look which silenced him. “Don't you see it was only a joke? And a very clever one, too! He only meant that he loved nobody but her! And, instead of being pleased with the compliment, the spiteful little thing has gone away in a huff!”
The Sub-Warden was a very good hand at changing a subject. He walked across to the window. “My dear,” he said, “is that a pig that I see down below, rooting about among your flower-beds?”
“A pig!” shrieked46 my Lady, rushing madly to the window, and almost pushing her husband out, in her anxiety to see for herself. “Whose pig is it? How did it get in? Where's that crazy Gardener gone?”
At this moment Bruno re-entered the room, and passing Uggug (who was blubbering his loudest, in the hope of attracting notice) as if he was quite used to that sort of thing, he ran up to Sylvie and threw his arms round her. “I went to my toy-cupboard,” he said with a very sorrowful face, “to see if there were somefin fit for a present for oo! And there isn't nuffin! They's all broken, every one! And I haven't got no money left, to buy oo a birthday-present! And I ca'n't give oo nuffin but this!” (“This” was a very earnest hug and a kiss.)
“Oh, thank you, darling!” cried Sylvie. “I like your present best of all!” (But if so, why did she give it back so quickly?)
His Sub-Excellency turned and patted the two children on the head with his long lean hands. “Go away, dears!” he said. “There's business to talk over.”
Sylvie and Bruno went away hand in hand: but, on reaching the door, Sylvie came back again and went up to Uggug timidly. “I don't mind about the butter,” she said, “and I—I'm sorry he hurt you!” And she tried to shake hands with the little ruffian: but Uggug only blubbered louder, and wouldn't make friends. Sylvie left the room with a sigh.
The Sub-Warden glared angrily at his weeping son. “Leave the room, Sirrah!” he said, as loud as he dared. His wife was still leaning out of the window, and kept repeating “I ca'n't see that pig! Where is it?”
“It's moved to the right now it's gone a little to the left,” said the Sub-Warden: but he had his back to the window, and was making signals to the Lord Chancellor, pointing to Uggug and the door, with many a cunning nod and wink47.
{Image...Removal of Uggug}
The Chancellor caught his meaning at last, and, crossing the room, took that interesting child by the ear the next moment he and Uggug were out of the room, and the door shut behind them: but not before one piercing yell had rung through the room, and reached the ears of the fond mother.
“It's some hyaena—or other,” replied the Sub-Warden, looking vaguely49 up to the ceiling, as if that was where they usually were to be found. “Let us to business, my dear. Here comes the Warden.” And he picked up from the floor a wandering scrap50 of manuscript, on which I just caught the words 'after which Election duly holden the said Sibimet and Tabikat his wife may at their pleasure assume Imperial—' before, with a guilty look, he crumpled51 it up in his hand.
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收听单词发音
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1
warden
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| n.监察员，监狱长，看守人，监护人 | |
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chancellor
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| n.(英)大臣；法官；(德、奥)总理；大学校长 | |
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shrill
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| adj.尖声的；刺耳的；v尖叫 | |
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portentous
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| adj.不祥的，可怕的，装腔作势的 | |
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genial
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| adj.亲切的，和蔼的，愉快的，脾气好的 | |
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mellow
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| adj.柔和的；熟透的；v.变柔和；(使)成熟 | |
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dignified
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| a.可敬的，高贵的 | |
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8
triumphantly
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| ad.得意洋洋地；得胜地；成功地 | |
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urn
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| n.（有座脚的）瓮；坟墓；骨灰瓮 | |
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10
pointed
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| adj.尖的，直截了当的 | |
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exasperated
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| adj.恼怒的 | |
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abject
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| adj.极可怜的，卑屈的 | |
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hoarse
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| adj.嘶哑的，沙哑的 | |
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heartily
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| adv.衷心地，诚恳地，十分，很 | |
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regularity
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| n.规律性，规则性；匀称，整齐 | |
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astonishment
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| n.惊奇，惊异 | |
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scarcity
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| n.缺乏，不足，萧条 | |
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18
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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emboldened
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| v.鼓励，使有胆量( embolden的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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20
ledgers
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| n.分类账( ledger的名词复数 ) | |
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21
countermanded
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| v.取消（命令），撤回( countermand的过去分词 ) | |
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inspection
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| n.检查，审查，检阅 | |
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abolition
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| n.废除，取消 | |
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holder
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| n.持有者，占有者；(台，架等)支持物 | |
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vice
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| n.坏事；恶习；[pl.]台钳，老虎钳；adj.副的 | |
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26
appease
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| v.安抚，缓和，平息，满足 | |
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seedling
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| n.秧苗，树苗 | |
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seething
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| 沸腾的，火热的 | |
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29
acting
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| n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的 | |
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30
enquired
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| 打听( enquire的过去式和过去分词 )； 询问； 问问题； 查问 | |
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31
bellowed
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| v.发出吼叫声，咆哮（尤指因痛苦）( bellow的过去式和过去分词 )；（愤怒地）说出（某事），大叫 | |
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32
eyebrows
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| 眉毛( eyebrow的名词复数 ) | |
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33
admiration
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| n.钦佩，赞美，羡慕 | |
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34
alacrity
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| n.敏捷，轻快，乐意 | |
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meek
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| adj.温顺的，逆来顺受的 | |
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fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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hesitation
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| n.犹豫，踌躇 | |
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melancholy
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| n.忧郁，愁思；adj.令人感伤（沮丧）的，忧郁的 | |
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second-hand
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| adj.用过的，旧的，二手的 | |
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40
hearty
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| adj.热情友好的；衷心的；尽情的，纵情的 | |
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41
bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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42
standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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43
exultingly
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| 兴高采烈地，得意地 | |
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44
crimson
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| n./adj.深(绯)红色(的)；vi.脸变绯红色 | |
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45
growled
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| v.（动物）发狺狺声， （雷）作隆隆声( growl的过去式和过去分词 )；低声咆哮着说 | |
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46
shrieked
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| v.尖叫( shriek的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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47
wink
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| n.眨眼，使眼色，瞬间；v.眨眼，使眼色，闪烁 | |
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48
hideous
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| adj.丑陋的，可憎的，可怕的，恐怖的 | |
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49
vaguely
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| adv.含糊地，暖昧地 | |
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50
scrap
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| n.碎片；废料；v.废弃，报废 | |
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51
crumpled
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| adj. 弯扭的, 变皱的 动词crumple的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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