' "Come and help, man! Are you mad to throw your only chance away? Come and help, man! Man! Look there -- look!"
'And at last Jim looked astern where the other pointed5 with maniacal6 insistence7. He saw a silent black squall which had eaten up already one-third of the sky. You know how these squalls come up there about that time of the year. First you see a darkening of the horizon -- no more; then a cloud rises opaque8 like a wall. A straight edge of vapour lined with sickly whitish gleams flies up from the south-west, swallowing the stars in whole constellations9; its shadow flies over the waters, and confounds sea and sky into one abyss of obscurity. And all is still. No thunder, no wind, no sound; not a flicker10 of lightning. Then in the tenebrous immensity a livid arch appears; a swell11 or two like undulations of the very darkness run past, and, suddenly, wind and rain strike together with a peculiar12 impetuosity as if they had burst through something solid. Such a cloud had come up while they weren't looking. They had just noticed it, and were perfectly13 justified14 in surmising15 that if in absolute stillness there was some chance for the ship to keep afloat a few minutes longer, the least disturbance16 of the sea would make an end of her instantly. Her first nod to the swell that precedes the burst of such a squall would be also her last, would become a plunge17, would, so to speak, be prolonged into a long dive, down, down to the bottom. Hence these new capers18 of their fright, these new antics in which they displayed their extreme aversion to die.
' "It was black, black," pursued Jim with moody19 steadiness. "It had sneaked20 upon us from behind. The infernal thing! I suppose there had been at the back of my head some hope yet. I don't know. But that was all over anyhow. It maddened me to see myself caught like this. I was angry, as though I had been trapped. I was trapped! The night was hot, too, I remember. Not a breath of air."
'He remembered so well that, gasping21 in the chair, he seemed to sweat and choke before my eyes. No doubt it maddened him; it knocked him over afresh -- in a manner of speaking -- but it made him also remember that important purpose which had sent him rushing on that bridge only to slip clean out of his mind. He had intended to cut the lifeboats clear of the ship. He whipped out hus knife and went to work slashing23 as though he had seen nothing, had heard nothing, had known of no one on board. They thought him hopelessly wrong-headed and crazy, but dared not protest noisily against this useless loss of time. When he had done he returned to the very same spot from which he had started. The chief was there, ready with a clutch at him to whisper close to his head, scathingly, as though he wanted to bite his ear
' "You silly fool! do you think you'll get the ghost of a show when all that lot of brutes24 is in the water? Why, they will batter25 your head for you from these boats."
'He wrung26 his hands, ignored, at Jim's elbow. The skipper kept up a nervous shuffle27 in one place and mumbled28, "Hammer! hammer! Mein Gott! Get a hammer."
'The little engineer whimpered like a child, but, broken arm and all, he turned out the least craven of the lot as it seems, and, actually, mustered29 enough pluck to run an errand to the engine-room. No trifle, it must be owned in fairness to him. Jim told me he darted30 desperate looks like a cornered man, gave one low wail31, and dashed off. He was back instantly clambering, hammer in hand, and without a pause flung himself at the bolt. The others gave up Jim at once and ran off to assist. He heard the tap, tap of the hammer, the sound of the released chock falling over. The boat was clear. Only then he turned to look -- only then. But he kept his distance -- he kept his distance. He wanted me to know he had kept his distance; that there was nothing in common between him and these men -who had the hammer. Nothing whatever. It is more than probable he thought himself cut off from them by a space that could not be traversed, by an obstacle that could not be overcome, by a chasm32 without bottom. He was as far as he could get from them -- the whole breadth of the ship.
'His feet were glued to that remote spot and his eyes to their indistinct group bowed together and swaying strangely in the common torment33 of fear. A hand-lamp lashed34 to a stanchion above a little table rigged up on the bridge -- the Patna had no chart-room amidships -- threw a light on their labouring shoulders, on their arched and bobbing backs. They pushed at the bow of the boat; they pushed out into the night; they pushed, and would no more look back at him. They had given him up as if indeed he had been too far, too hopelessly separated from themselves, to be worth an appealing word, a glance, or a sign. They had no leisure to look back upon his passive heroism35, to feel the sting of his abstention. The boat was heavy; they pushed at the bow with no breath to spare for an encouraging word: but the turmoil36 of terror that had scattered37 their self-command like chaff38 before the wind, converted their desperate exertions39 into a bit of fooling, upon my word, fit for knockabout clowns in a farce40. They pushed with their hands, with their heads, they pushed for dear life with all the weight of their bodies, they pushed with all the might of their souls -- only no sooner had they succeeded in canting the stem clear of the davit than they would leave off like one man and start a wild scramble41 into her. As a natural consequence the boat would swing in abruptly42, driving them back, helpless and jostling against each other. They would stand nonplussed43 for a while, exchanging in fierce whispers all the infamous44 names they could call to mind, and go at it again. Three times this occurred. He described it to me with morose45 thoughtfulness. He hadn't lost a single movement of that comic business. "I loathed46 them. I hated them. I had to look at all that," he said without emphasis, turning upon me a sombrely watchful47 glance. "Was ever there any one so shamefully48 tried?"
'He took his head in his hands for a moment, like a man driven to distraction49 by some unspeakable outrage50. These were things he could not explain to the court -- and not even to me; but I would have been little fitted for the reception of his confidences had I not been able at times to understand the pauses between the words. In this assault upon his fortitude51 there was the jeering52 intention of a spiteful and vile3 vengeance53; there was an element of burlesque54 in his ordeal55 -- a degradation56 of funny grimaces57 in the approach of death or dishonour58.
'He related facts which I have not forgotten, but at this distance of time I couldn't recall his very words: I only remember that he managed wonderfully to convey the brooding rancour of his mind into the bare recital59 of events. Twice, he told me, he shut his eyes in the certitude that the end was upon him already, and twice he had to open them again. Each time he noted60 the darkening of the great stillness. The shadow of the silent cloud had fallen upon the ship from the zenith, and seemed to have extinguished every sound of her teeming61 life. He could no longer hear the voices under the awnings62. He told me that each time he closed his eyes a flash of thought showed him that crowd of bodies, laid out for death, as plain as daylight. When he opened them, it was to see the dim struggle of four men fighting like mad with a stubborn boat. "They would fall back before it time after time, stand swearing at each other, and suddenly make another rush in a bunch.... Enough to make you die laughing," he commented with downcast eyes; then raising them for a moment to my face with a dismal63 smile, "I ought to have a merry life of it, by God! for I shall see that funny sight a good many times yet before I die." His eyes fell again. "See and hear.... See and hear," he repeated twice, at long intervals64, filled by vacant staring.
'He roused himself.
' "I made up my mind to keep my eyes shut," he said, "and I couldn't. I couldn't, and I don't care who knows it. Let them go through that kind of thing before they talk. Just let them -- and do better -- that's all. The second time my eyelids65 flew open and my mouth too. I had felt the ship move. She just dipped her bows -and lifted them gently -- and slow! everlastingly67 slow; and ever so little. She hadn't done that much for days. The cloud had raced ahead, and this first swell seemed to travel upon a sea of lead. There was no life in that stir. Itmanaged, though, to knock over something in my head. What would you have done? You are sure of yourself -aren't you? What would you do if you felt now -- this minute -- the house here move, just move a little under your chair. Leap! By heavens! you would take one spring from where you sit and land in that clump68 of bushes yonder."
'He flung his arm out at the night beyond the stone balustrade. I held my peace. He looked at me very steadily69, very severe. There could be no mistake: I was being bullied70 now, and it behoved me to make no sign lest by a gesture or a word I should be drawn71 into a fatal admission about myself which would have had some bearing on the case. I was not disposed to take any risk of that sort. Don't forget I had him before me, and really he was too much like one of us not to be dangerous. But if you want to know I don't mind telling you that I did, with a rapid glance, estimate the distance to the mass of denser72 blackness in the middle of the grass-plot before the verandah. He exaggerated. I would have landed short by several feet -- and that's the only thing of which I am fairly certain.
'The last moment had come, as he thought, and he did not move. His feet remained glued to the planks73 if his thoughts were knocking about loose in his head. It was at this moment too that he saw one of the men around the boat step backwards74 suddenly, clutch at the air with raised arms, totter75 and collapse76. He didn't exactly fall, he only slid gently into a sitting posture77, all hunched78 up, and with his shoulders propped79 against the side of the engine-room skylight. "That was the donkey-man. A haggard, white-faced chap with a ragged80 moustache. Acted third engineer," he explained.
' "Dead," I said. We had heard something of that in court.
' "So they say," he pronounced with sombre indifference81. "Of course I never knew. Weak heart. The man had been complaining of being out of sorts for some time before. Excitement. Over-exertion. Devil only knows. Ha! ha! ha! It was easy to see he did not want to die either. Droll82, isn't it? May I be shot if he hadn't been fooled into killing83 himself! Fooled -- neither more nor less. Fooled into it, by heavens! just as I . . . Ah! If he had only kept still; if he had only told them to go to the devil when they came to rush him out of his bunk84 because the ship was sinking! If he had only stood by with his hands in his pockets and called them names!"
'He got up, shook his fist, glared at me, and sat down.
' "A chance missed, eh?" I murmured.
' "Why don't you laugh?" he said. "A joke hatched in hell. Weak heart! . . . I wish sometimes mine had been."
'This irritated me. "Do you?" I exclaimed with deep-rooted irony85. "Yes! Can'tyou understand?" he cried. "I don't know what more you could wish for," I said angrily. He gave me an utterly86 uncomprehending glance. This shaft87 had also gone wide of the mark, and he was not the man to bother about stray arrows. Upon my word, he was too unsuspecting; he was not fair game. I was glad that my missile had been thrown away, -- that he had not even heard the twang of the bow.
'Of course he could not know at the time the man was dead. The next minute -- his last on board -- was crowded with a tumult88 of events and sensations which beat about him like the sea upon a rock. I use the simile89 advisedly, because from his relation I am forced to believe he had preserved through it all a strange illusion of passiveness, as though he had not acted but had suffered bimself to be handled by the infernal powers who had selected him for the victim of their practical joke. The first thing that came to him was the grinding surge of the heavy davits swinging out at last -- a jar which seemed to enter his body from the deck through the soles of his feet, and travel up his spine90 to the crown of his head. Then, the squall being very near now, another and a heavier swell lifted the passive hull91 in a threatening heave that checked his breath, while his brain and his heart together were pierced as with daggers92 by panic-stricken screams. "Let go! For God's sake, let go! Let go! She's going." Following upon that the boat-falls ripped through the blocks, and a lot of men began to talk in startled tones under the awnings. "When these beggars did break out, their yelps93 were enough to wake the dead," he said. Next, after the splashing shock of the boat literally94 dropped in the water, came the hollow noises of stamping and tumbling in her, mingled95 with confused shouts: "Unhook! Unhook! Shove! Unhook! Shove for your life! Here's the squall down on us.... " He heard, high above his head, the faint muttering of the wind; he heard below his feet a cry of pain. A lost voice alongside started cursing a swivel hook. The ship began to buzz fore22 and aft like a disturbed hive, and, as quietly as he was telling me of all this -- because just then he was very quiet in attitude, in face, in voice -- he went on to say without the slightest warning as it were, "I stumbled over his legs."
'This was the first I heard of his having moved at all. I could not restrain a grunt96 of surprise. Something had started him off at last, but of the exact moment, of the cause that tore him out of his immobility, he knew no more than the uprooted97 tree knows of the wind that laid it low. All this had come to him: the sounds, the sights, the legs of the dead man -- by Jove! The infernal joke was being crammed98 devilishly down his throat, but -- look you -- he was not going to admit of any sort of swallowing motion in his gullet. It's extraordinary how he could cast upon you the spirit of his illusion. I listened as if to a tale of black magic at work upon a corpse99.
' "He went over sideways, very gently, and this is the last thing I remember seeing on board," he continued. "I did not care what he did. It looked as though he were picking himself up: I thought he was picking himself up, of course: I expected him to bolt past me over the rail and drop into the boat after the others. I could hear them knocking about down there, and a voice as if crying up a shaft called out 'George!' Then three voices together raised a yell. They came to me separately: one bleated100, another screamed, one howled. Ough!"
'He shivered a little, and I beheld101 him rise slowly as if a steady hand from above had been pulling him out of the chair by his hair. Up, slowly -- to his full height, and when his knees had locked stiff the hand let him go, and he swayed a little on his feet. There was a suggestion of awful stillness in his face, in his movements, in his very voice when he said "They shouted" -- and involuntarily I pricked102 up my ears for the ghost of that shout that would be heard directly through the false effect of silence. "There were eight hundred people in that ship," he said, impaling103 me to the back of my seat with an awful blank stare. "Eight hundred living people, and they were yelling after the one dead man to come down and be saved. 'Jump, George! Jump! Oh, jump!' I stood by with my hand on the davit. I was very quiet. It had come over pitch dark. You could see neither sky nor sea. I heard the boat alongside go bump, bump, and not another sound down there for a while, but the ship under me was full of talking noises. Suddenly the skipper howled 'Mein Gott! The squall! The squall! Shove off!' With the first hiss104 of rain, and the first gust105 of wind, they screamed, 'Jump, George! We'll catch you! Jump!' The ship began a slow plunge; the rain swept over her like a broken sea; my cap flew off my head; my breath was driven back into my throat. I heard as if I had been on the top of a tower another wild screech106, 'Geo-o-o-orge! Oh, jump!' She was going down, down, head first under me.... "
'He raised his hand deliberately107 to his face, and made picking motions with his fingers as though he had been bothered with cobwebs, and afterwards he looked into the open palm for quite half a second before he blurted108 out
' "I had jumped . . . " He checked himself, averted109 his gaze.... "It seems," he added.
'His clear blue eyes turned to me with a piteous stare, and looking at him standing110 before me, dumfounded and hurt, I was oppressed by a sad sense of resigned wisdom, mingled with the amused and profound pity of an old man helpless before a childish disaster.
' "Looks like it," I muttered.
' "I knew nothing about it till I looked up," he explained hastily. And that's possible too. You had to listen to him as you would to a small boy in trouble. He didn't know. It had happened somehow. It would never happen again. He had landed partly on somebody and fallen across a thwart111. He felt as though all his ribs112 on his left side must be broken; then he rolled over, and saw vaguely113 the ship he had deserted114 uprising above him, with the red side-light glowing large in the rain like a fire on the brow of a hill seen through a mist. "She seemed higher than a wall; she loomed115 like a cliff over the boat . . . I wished I could die," he cried. "There was no going back. It was as if I had jumped into a well -- into an everlasting66 deep hole.... " '
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1
severely
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| adv.严格地；严厉地；非常恶劣地 | |
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2
formulated
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| v.构想出( formulate的过去式和过去分词 )；规划；确切地阐述；用公式表示 | |
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vile
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| adj.卑鄙的，可耻的，邪恶的；坏透的 | |
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4
whined
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| v.哀号( whine的过去式和过去分词 )；哀诉，诉怨 | |
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pointed
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| adj.尖的，直截了当的 | |
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maniacal
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| adj.发疯的 | |
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insistence
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| n.坚持；强调；坚决主张 | |
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8
opaque
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| adj.不透光的；不反光的，不传导的；晦涩的 | |
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9
constellations
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| n.星座( constellation的名词复数 )；一群杰出人物；一系列（相关的想法、事物）；一群（相关的人） | |
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flicker
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| vi./n.闪烁，摇曳，闪现 | |
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swell
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| vi.膨胀，肿胀；增长，增强 | |
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peculiar
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| adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的 | |
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perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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14
justified
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| a.正当的，有理的 | |
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15
surmising
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| v.臆测，推断( surmise的现在分词 )；揣测；猜想 | |
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disturbance
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| n.动乱，骚动；打扰，干扰；(身心)失调 | |
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17
plunge
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| v.跳入，(使)投入，(使)陷入；猛冲 | |
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capers
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| n.开玩笑( caper的名词复数 )；刺山柑v.跳跃，雀跃( caper的第三人称单数 ) | |
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moody
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| adj.心情不稳的，易怒的，喜怒无常的 | |
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sneaked
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| v.潜行( sneak的过去式和过去分词 )；偷偷溜走；（儿童向成人）打小报告；告状 | |
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gasping
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| adj. 气喘的, 痉挛的 动词gasp的现在分词 | |
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fore
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| adv.在前面；adj.先前的；在前部的；n.前部 | |
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slashing
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| adj.尖锐的；苛刻的；鲜明的；乱砍的v.挥砍( slash的现在分词 )；鞭打；割破；削减 | |
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brutes
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| 兽( brute的名词复数 )； 畜生； 残酷无情的人； 兽性 | |
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batter
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| v.接连重击；磨损；n.牛奶面糊；击球员 | |
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wrung
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| 绞( wring的过去式和过去分词 )； 握紧（尤指别人的手）； 把（湿衣服）拧干； 绞掉（水） | |
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shuffle
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| n.拖著脚走，洗纸牌；v.拖曳，慢吞吞地走 | |
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mumbled
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| 含糊地说某事，叽咕，咕哝( mumble的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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mustered
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| v.集合，召集，集结（尤指部队）( muster的过去式和过去分词 )；（自他人处）搜集某事物；聚集；激发 | |
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darted
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| v.投掷，投射( dart的过去式和过去分词 )；向前冲，飞奔 | |
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wail
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| vt./vi.大声哀号，恸哭；呼啸，尖啸 | |
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chasm
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| n.深坑，断层，裂口，大分岐，利害冲突 | |
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torment
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| n.折磨；令人痛苦的东西(人)；vt.折磨；纠缠 | |
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lashed
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| adj.具睫毛的v.鞭打( lash的过去式和过去分词 )；煽动；紧系；怒斥 | |
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heroism
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| n.大无畏精神，英勇 | |
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turmoil
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| n.骚乱，混乱，动乱 | |
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37
scattered
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| adj.分散的，稀疏的；散步的；疏疏落落的 | |
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chaff
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| v.取笑，嘲笑；n.谷壳 | |
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exertions
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| n.努力( exertion的名词复数 )；费力；（能力、权力等的）运用；行使 | |
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40
farce
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| n.闹剧，笑剧，滑稽戏；胡闹 | |
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41
scramble
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| v.爬行，攀爬，杂乱蔓延，碎片，片段，废料 | |
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42
abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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43
nonplussed
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| adj.不知所措的，陷于窘境的v.使迷惑( nonplus的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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44
infamous
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| adj.声名狼藉的，臭名昭著的，邪恶的 | |
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45
morose
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| adj.脾气坏的，不高兴的 | |
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46
loathed
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| v.憎恨，厌恶( loathe的过去式和过去分词 )；极不喜欢 | |
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47
watchful
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| adj.注意的，警惕的 | |
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48
shamefully
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| 可耻地； 丢脸地； 不体面地； 羞耻地 | |
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49
distraction
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| n.精神涣散，精神不集中，消遣，娱乐 | |
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50
outrage
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| n.暴行，侮辱，愤怒；vt.凌辱，激怒 | |
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51
fortitude
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| n.坚忍不拔；刚毅 | |
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52
jeering
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| adj.嘲弄的，揶揄的v.嘲笑( jeer的现在分词 ) | |
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53
vengeance
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| n.报复，报仇，复仇 | |
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54
burlesque
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| v.嘲弄，戏仿；n.嘲弄，取笑，滑稽模仿 | |
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55
ordeal
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| n.苦难经历，（尤指对品格、耐力的）严峻考验 | |
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56
degradation
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| n.降级；低落；退化；陵削；降解；衰变 | |
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57
grimaces
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| n.（表蔑视、厌恶等）面部扭曲，鬼脸( grimace的名词复数 )v.扮鬼相，做鬼脸( grimace的第三人称单数 ) | |
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58
dishonour
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| n./vt.拒付（支票、汇票、票据等）；vt.凌辱，使丢脸；n.不名誉，耻辱，不光彩 | |
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59
recital
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| n.朗诵，独奏会，独唱会 | |
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60
noted
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| adj.著名的，知名的 | |
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61
teeming
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| adj.丰富的v.充满( teem的现在分词 )；到处都是；（指水、雨等）暴降；倾注 | |
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62
awnings
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| 篷帐布 | |
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63
dismal
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| adj.阴沉的，凄凉的，令人忧郁的，差劲的 | |
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64
intervals
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| n.[军事]间隔( interval的名词复数 )；间隔时间；[数学]区间；（戏剧、电影或音乐会的）幕间休息 | |
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65
eyelids
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| n.眼睑( eyelid的名词复数 )；眼睛也不眨一下；不露声色；面不改色 | |
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66
everlasting
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| adj.永恒的，持久的，无止境的 | |
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67
everlastingly
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| 永久地，持久地 | |
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68
clump
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| n.树丛，草丛；vi.用沉重的脚步行走 | |
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69
steadily
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| adv.稳定地；不变地；持续地 | |
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70
bullied
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| adj.被欺负了v.恐吓，威逼( bully的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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71
drawn
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| v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的 | |
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72
denser
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| adj. 不易看透的, 密集的, 浓厚的, 愚钝的 | |
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73
planks
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| （厚）木板( plank的名词复数 )； 政纲条目，政策要点 | |
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74
backwards
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| adv.往回地，向原处，倒，相反，前后倒置地 | |
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75
totter
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| v.蹒跚， 摇摇欲坠；n.蹒跚的步子 | |
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76
collapse
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| vi.累倒；昏倒；倒塌；塌陷 | |
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77
posture
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| n.姿势，姿态，心态，态度；v.作出某种姿势 | |
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78
hunched
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| （常指因寒冷、生病或愁苦）耸肩弓身的，伏首前倾的 | |
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79
propped
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| 支撑，支持，维持( prop的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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80
ragged
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| adj.衣衫褴褛的，粗糙的，刺耳的 | |
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81
indifference
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| n.不感兴趣，不关心，冷淡，不在乎 | |
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82
droll
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| adj.古怪的，好笑的 | |
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83
killing
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| n.巨额利润；突然赚大钱，发大财 | |
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84
bunk
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| n.(车、船等倚壁而设的)铺位；废话 | |
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85
irony
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| n.反语，冷嘲；具有讽刺意味的事，嘲弄 | |
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86
utterly
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| adv.完全地，绝对地 | |
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87
shaft
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| n.(工具的)柄，杆状物 | |
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88
tumult
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| n.喧哗；激动，混乱；吵闹 | |
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simile
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| n.直喻，明喻 | |
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90
spine
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| n.脊柱，脊椎；(动植物的)刺；书脊 | |
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91
hull
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| n.船身；(果、实等的)外壳；vt.去(谷物等)壳 | |
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92
daggers
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| 匕首，短剑( dagger的名词复数 ) | |
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93
yelps
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| n.（因痛苦、气愤、兴奋等的）短而尖的叫声( yelp的名词复数 )v.发出短而尖的叫声( yelp的第三人称单数 ) | |
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literally
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| adv.照字面意义，逐字地；确实 | |
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95
mingled
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| 混合，混入( mingle的过去式和过去分词 )； 混进，与…交往[联系] | |
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96
grunt
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| v.嘟哝；作呼噜声；n.呼噜声，嘟哝 | |
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97
uprooted
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| v.把（某物）连根拔起( uproot的过去式和过去分词 )；根除；赶走；把…赶出家园 | |
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98
crammed
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| adj.塞满的，挤满的；大口地吃；快速贪婪地吃v.把…塞满；填入；临时抱佛脚( cram的过去式) | |
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99
corpse
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| n.尸体，死尸 | |
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100
bleated
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| v.（羊，小牛）叫( bleat的过去式和过去分词 )；哭诉；发出羊叫似的声音；轻声诉说 | |
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101
beheld
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| v.看，注视( behold的过去式和过去分词 )；瞧；看呀；（叙述中用于引出某人意外的出现）哎哟 | |
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102
pricked
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| 刺，扎，戳( prick的过去式和过去分词 )； 刺伤； 刺痛； 使剧痛 | |
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103
impaling
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| 钉在尖桩上( impale的现在分词 ) | |
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104
hiss
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| v.发出嘶嘶声；发嘘声表示不满 | |
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105
gust
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| n.阵风，突然一阵（雨、烟等），（感情的）迸发 | |
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106
screech
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| n./v.尖叫；(发出)刺耳的声音 | |
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107
deliberately
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| adv.审慎地；蓄意地；故意地 | |
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108
blurted
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| v.突然说出，脱口而出( blurt的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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109
averted
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| 防止，避免( avert的过去式和过去分词 )； 转移 | |
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110
standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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111
thwart
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| v.阻挠，妨碍，反对；adj.横(断的) | |
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112
ribs
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| n.肋骨( rib的名词复数 )；（船或屋顶等的）肋拱；肋骨状的东西；（织物的）凸条花纹 | |
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113
vaguely
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| adv.含糊地，暖昧地 | |
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114
deserted
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| adj.荒芜的，荒废的，无人的，被遗弃的 | |
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115
loomed
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| v.隐约出现，阴森地逼近( loom的过去式和过去分词 )；隐约出现，阴森地逼近 | |
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