'The river-bank was steep; a great freshness ascended10, the light fell on the edge of smooth dark water frothing without a ripple11; right and left the shapes of the houses ran together below the sharp outlines of the roofs. "Take my greetings to Sherif Ali -- till I come myself," said Jim. Not one head of the three budged12. "Jump!" he thundered. The three splashes made one splash, a shower flew up, black heads bobbed convulsively, and disappeared; but a great blowing and spluttering went on, growing faint, for they were diving industriously13, in great fear of a parting shot. Jim turned to the girl, who had been a silent and attentive14 observer. His heart seemed suddenly to grow too big for his breast and choke him in the hollow of his throat. This probably made him speechless for so long, and after returning his gaze she flung the burning torch with a wide sweep of the arm into the river. The ruddy fiery15 glare, taking a long flight through the night, sank with a vicious hiss16, and the calm soft starlight descended17 upon them, unchecked.
'He did not tell me what it was he said when at last he recovered his voice. I don't suppose he could be very eloquent18. The world was still, the night breathed on them, one of those nights that seem created for the sheltering of tenderness, and there are moments when our souls, as if freed from their dark envelope, glow with an exquisite19 sensibility that makes certain silences more lucid20 than speeches. As to the girl, he told me, "She broke down a bit. Excitement -- don't you know. Reaction. Deucedly tired she must have been -- and all that kind of thing. And -- and -- hang it all -- she was fond of me, don't you see.... I too... didn't know, of course . . . never entered my head . . ."
'Then he got up and began to walk about in some agitation21. "I -I love her dearly. More than I can tell. Of course one cannot tell. You take a different view of your actions when you come to understand, when you are made to understand every day that your existence is necessary -- you see, absolutely necessary -- to another person. I am made to feel that. Wonderful! But only try to think what her life has been. It is too extravagantly22 awful! Isn't it? And me finding her here like this -- as you may go out for a stroll and come suddenly upon somebody drowning in a lonely dark place. Jove! No time to lose. Well, it is a trust too . . . I believe I am equal to it . . ."
'I must tell you the girl had left us to ourselves some time before. He slapped his chest. "Yes! I feel that, but I believe I am equal to all my luck!" He had the gift of finding a special meaning in everything that happened to him. This was the view he took of his love affair; it was idyllic23, a little solemn, and also true, since his belief had all the unshakable seriousness of youth. Some time after, on another occasion, he said to me, "I've been only two years here, and now, upon my word, I can't conceive being able to live anywhere else. The very thought of the world outside is enough to give me a fright; because, don't you see," he continued, with downcast eyes watching the action of his boot busied in squashing thoroughly24 a tiny bit of dried mud (we were strolling on the river-bank) -"because I have not forgotten why I came here. Not yet!"
'I refrained from looking at him, but I think I heard a short sigh; we took a turn or two in silence. "Upon my soul and conscience," he began again, "if such a thing can be forgotten, then I think I have a right to dismiss it from my mind. Ask any man here" . . . his voice changed. "Is it not strange," he went on in a gentle, almost yearning25 tone, "that all these people, all these people who would do anything for me, can never be made to understand? Never! If you disbelieved me I could not call them up. It seems hard, somehow. I am stupid, am I not? What more can I want? If you ask them who is brave -- who is true -- who is just -- who is it they would trust with their lives? -- they would say, Tuan Jim. And yet they can never know the real, real truth . . ."
'That's what he said to me on my last day with him. I did not let a murmur26 escape me: I felt he was going to say more, and come no nearer to the root of the matter. The sun, whose concentrated glare dwarfs27 the earth into a restless mote28 of dust, had sunk behind the forest, and the diffused29 light from an opal sky seemed to cast upon a world without shadows and without brilliance30 the illusion of a calm and pensive31 greatness. I don't know why, listening to him, I should have noted32 so distinctly the gradual darkening of the river, of the air; the irresistible33 slow work of the night settling silently on all the visible forms, effacing34 the oudines, burying the shapes deeper and deeper, like a steady fall of impalpable black dust.
' "Jove!" he began abruptly35, "there are days when a fellow is too absurd for anything; only I know I can tell you what I like. I talk about being done with it -- with the bally thing at the back of my head . . . Forgetting . . . Hang me if I know! I can think of it quietly. After all, what has it proved? Nothing. I suppose you don't think so . . ."
'I made a protesting murmur.
' "No matter," he said. "I am satisfied . . . nearly. I've got to look only at the face of the first man that comes along, to regain36 my confidence. They can't be made to understand what is going on in me. What of that? Come! I haven't done so badly."
' "Not so badly," I said.
' "But all the same, you wouldn't like to have me aboard your own ship hey?"
' "Confound you!" I cried. "Stop this."
' "Aha! You see," he said, crowing, as it were, over me placidly37. "Only," he went on, "you just try to tell this to any of them here. They would think you a fool, a liar38, or worse. And so I can stand it. I've done a thing or two for them, but this is what they have done for me."
' "My dear chap," I cried, "you shall always remain for them an insoluble mystery." Thereupon we were silent.
' "Mystery," he repeated, before looking up. "Well, then let me always remain here."
'After the sun had set, the darkness seemed to drive upon us, borne in every faint puff39 of the breeze. In the middle of a hedged path I saw the arrested, gaunt, watchful40, and apparently41 one-legged silhouette42 of Tamb' Itam; and across the dusky space my eye detected something white moving to and fro behind the supports of the roof. As soon as Jim, with Tamb' Itam at his heels, had started upon his evening rounds, I went up to the house alone, and, unexpectedly, found myself waylaid43 by the girl, who had been clearly waiting for this opportunity.
'It is hard to tell you what it was precisely44 she wanted to wrest45 from me. Obviously it would be something very simple -- the simplest impossibility in the world; as, for instance, the exact description of the form of a cloud. She wanted an assurance, a statement, a promise, an explanation -- I don't know how to call it: the thing has no name. It was dark under the projecting roof, and all I could see were the flowing lines of her gown, the pale small oval of her face, with the white flash of her teeth, and, turned towards me, the big sombre orbits of her eyes, where there seemed to be a faint stir, such as you may fancy you can detect when you plunge46 your gaze to the bottom of an immensely deep well. What is it that moves there? you ask yourself. Is it a blind monster or only a lost gleam from the universe? It occurred to me -- don't laugh -- that all things being dissimilar, she was more inscrutable in her childish ignorance than the Sphinx propounding47 childish riddles48 to wayfarers49. She had been carried off to Patusan before her eyes were open. She had grown up there; she had seen nothing, she had known nothing, she had no conception of anything. I ask myself whether she were sure that anything else existed. What notions she may have formed of the outside world is to me inconceivable: all that she knew of its inhabitants were a betrayed woman and a sinister50 pantaloon. Her lover also came to her from there, gifted with irresistible seductions; but what would become of her if he should return to these inconceivable regions that seemed always to claim back their own? Her mother had warned her of this with tears, before she died . . .
'She had caught hold of my arm firmly, and as soon as I had stopped she had withdrawn51 her hand in haste. She was audacious and shrinking. She feared nothing, but she was checked by the profound incertitude52 and the extreme strangeness -- a brave person groping in the dark. I belonged to this Unknown that might claim Jim for its own at any moment. I was, as it were, in the secret of its nature and of its intentions -- the confidant of a threatening mystery -- armed with its power, perhaps! I believe she supposed I could with a word whisk Jim away out of her very arms; it is my sober conviction she went through agonies of apprehension53 during my long talks with Jim; through a real and intolerable anguish54 that might have conceivably driven her into plotting my murder, had the fierceness of her soul been equal to the tremendous situation it had created. This is my impression, and it is all I can give you: the whole thing dawned gradually upon me, and as it got clearer and clearer I was overwhelmed by a slow incredulous amazement55. She made me believe her, but there is no word that on my lips could render the effect of the headlong and vehement56 whisper, of the soft, passionate57 tones, of the sudden breathless pause and the appealing movement of the white arms extended swiftly. They fell; the ghostly figure swayed like a slender tree in the wind, the pale oval of the face drooped58; it was impossible to distinguish her features, the darkness of the eyes was unfathomable; two wide sleeves uprose in the dark like unfolding wings, and she stood silent, holding her head in her hands.'
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1
advantageous
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| adj.有利的；有帮助的 | |
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doorway
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| n.门口，(喻)入门；门路，途径 | |
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vertical
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| adj.垂直的，顶点的，纵向的；n.垂直物，垂直的位置 | |
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perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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rigidly
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| adv.刻板地，僵化地 | |
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erect
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| n./v.树立，建立，使竖立；adj.直立的，垂直的 | |
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7
glide
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| n./v.溜，滑行；(时间)消逝 | |
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touching
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| adj.动人的，使人感伤的 | |
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rustle
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| v.沙沙作响；偷盗(牛、马等)；n.沙沙声声 | |
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10
ascended
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| v.上升，攀登( ascend的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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11
ripple
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| n.涟波，涟漪，波纹，粗钢梳；vt.使...起涟漪，使起波纹； vi.呈波浪状，起伏前进 | |
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12
budged
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| v.（使）稍微移动( budge的过去式和过去分词 )；（使）改变主意，（使）让步 | |
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13
industriously
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14
attentive
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| adj.注意的，专心的；关心(别人)的，殷勤的 | |
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15
fiery
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| adj.燃烧着的，火红的；暴躁的；激烈的 | |
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16
hiss
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| v.发出嘶嘶声；发嘘声表示不满 | |
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17
descended
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| a.为...后裔的，出身于...的 | |
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eloquent
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| adj.雄辩的，口才流利的；明白显示出的 | |
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19
exquisite
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| adj.精美的；敏锐的；剧烈的，感觉强烈的 | |
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lucid
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| adj.明白易懂的，清晰的，头脑清楚的 | |
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21
agitation
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| n.搅动；搅拌；鼓动，煽动 | |
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extravagantly
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| adv.挥霍无度地 | |
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idyllic
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| adj.质朴宜人的，田园风光的 | |
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24
thoroughly
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| adv.完全地，彻底地，十足地 | |
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yearning
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| a.渴望的；向往的；怀念的 | |
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murmur
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| n.低语，低声的怨言；v.低语，低声而言 | |
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27
dwarfs
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| n.侏儒，矮子（dwarf的复数形式）vt.（使）显得矮小（dwarf的第三人称单数形式） | |
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mote
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| n.微粒；斑点 | |
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diffused
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| 散布的，普及的，扩散的 | |
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brilliance
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| n.光辉，辉煌，壮丽，（卓越的）才华，才智 | |
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pensive
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| a.沉思的,哀思的,忧沉的 | |
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32
noted
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| adj.著名的，知名的 | |
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33
irresistible
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| adj.非常诱人的，无法拒绝的，无法抗拒的 | |
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34
effacing
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| 谦逊的 | |
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abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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regain
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| vt.重新获得，收复，恢复 | |
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placidly
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| adv.平稳地，平静地 | |
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liar
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| n.说谎的人 | |
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puff
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| n.一口(气)；一阵(风)；v.喷气，喘气 | |
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watchful
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| adj.注意的，警惕的 | |
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41
apparently
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| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
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42
silhouette
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| n.黑色半身侧面影，影子，轮廓；v.描绘成侧面影，照出影子来，仅仅显出轮廓 | |
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43
waylaid
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| v.拦截，拦路( waylay的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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44
precisely
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| adv.恰好，正好，精确地，细致地 | |
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45
wrest
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| n.扭，拧，猛夺；v.夺取，猛扭，歪曲 | |
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46
plunge
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| v.跳入，(使)投入，(使)陷入；猛冲 | |
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47
propounding
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| v.提出（问题、计划等）供考虑[讨论]，提议( propound的现在分词 ) | |
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48
riddles
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| n.谜（语）( riddle的名词复数 )；猜不透的难题，难解之谜 | |
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49
wayfarers
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| n.旅人，（尤指）徒步旅行者( wayfarer的名词复数 ) | |
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50
sinister
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| adj.不吉利的，凶恶的，左边的 | |
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51
withdrawn
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| vt.收回；使退出；vi.撤退，退出 | |
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52
incertitude
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| n.疑惑，不确定 | |
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53
apprehension
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| n.理解，领悟；逮捕，拘捕；忧虑 | |
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54
anguish
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| n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼 | |
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55
amazement
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| n.惊奇，惊讶 | |
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56
vehement
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| adj.感情强烈的；热烈的；(人)有强烈感情的 | |
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57
passionate
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，激昂的，易动情的，易怒的，性情暴躁的 | |
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58
drooped
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| 弯曲或下垂，发蔫( droop的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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