'Nothing,' said Marlow with a slight start. 'He had told her -that's all. She did not believe him -- nothing more. As to myself, I do not know whether it be just, proper, decent for me to rejoice or to be sorry. For my part, I cannot say what I believed -- indeed I don't know to this day, and never shall probably. But what did the poor devil believe himself? Truth shall prevail -- don't you know. Magna est veritas el . . . Yes, when it gets a chance. There is a law, no doubt -- and likewise a law regulates your luck in the throwing of dice5. It is not Justice the servant of men, but accident, hazard, Fortune -- the ally of patient Time -- that holds an even and scrupulous6 balance. Both of us had said the very same thing. Did we both speak the truth -- or one of us did -- or neither? . . .'
Marlow paused, crossed his arms on his breast, and in a changed tone
'She said we lied. Poor soul! Well -- let's leave it to Chance, whose ally is Time, that cannot be hurried, and whose enemy is Death, that will not wait. I had retreated -- a little cowed, I must own. I had tried a fall with fear itself and got thrown -- of course. I had only succeeded in adding to her anguish7 the hint of some mysterious collusion, of an inexplicable8 and incomprehensible conspiracy9 to keep her for ever in the dark. And it had come easily, naturally, unavoidably, by his act, by her own act! It was as though I had been shown the working of the implacable destiny of which we are the victims -- and the tools. It was appalling10 to think of the girl whom I had left standing11 there motionless; Jim's footsteps had a fateful sound as he tramped by, without seeing me, in his heavy laced boots. "What? No lights!" he said in a loud, surprised voice. "What are you doing in the dark -- you two?" Next moment he caught sight of her, I suppose. "Hallo, girl!" he cried cheerily. "Hallo, boy!" she answered at once, with amazing pluck.
'This was their usual greeting to each other, and the bit of swagger she would put into her rather high but sweet voice was very droll12, pretty, and childlike. It delighted Jim greatly. This was the last occasion on which I heard them exchange this familiar hail, and it struck a chill into my heart. There was the high sweet voice, the pretty effort, the swagger; but it all seemed to die out prematurely13, and the playful call sounded like a moan. It was too confoundedly awful. "What have you done with Marlow?" Jim was asking; and then, "Gone down -- has he? Funny I didn't meet him.... You there, Marlow?"
'I didn't answer. I wasn't going in -- not yet at any rate. I really couldn't. While he was calling me I was engaged in making my escape through a little gate leading out upon a stretch of newly cleared ground. No; I couldn't face them yet. I walked hastily with lowered head along a trodden path. The ground rose gently, the few big trees had been felled, the undergrowth had been cut down and the grass fired. He had a mind to try a coffee-plantation there. The big hill, rearing its double summit coal-black in the clear yellow glow of the rising moon, seemed to cast its shadow upon the ground prepared for that experiment. He was going to try ever so many experiments; I had admired his energy, his enterprise, and his shrewdness. Nothing on earth seeemed less real now than his plans, his energy, and his enthusiasm; and raising my eyes, I saw part of the moon glittering through the bushes at the bottom of the chasm14. For a moment it looked as though the smooth disc, falling from its place in the sky upon the earth, had rolled to the bottom of that precipice15: its ascending16 movement was like a leisurely17 rebound18; it disengaged itself from the tangle19 of twigs20; the bare contorted limb of some tree, growing on the slope, made a black crack right across its face. It threw its level rays afar as if from a cavern21, and in this mournful eclipse-like light the stumps22 of felled trees uprose very dark, the heavy shadows fell at my feet on all sides, my own moving shadow, and across my path the shadow of the solitary23 grave perpetually garlanded with flowers. In the darkened moonlight the interlaced blossoms took on shapes foreign to one's memory and colours indefinable to the eye, as though they had been special flowers gathered by no man, grown not in this world, and destined24 for the use of the dead alone. Their powerful scent25 hung in the warm air, making it thick and heavy like the fumes26 of incense27. The lumps of white coral shone round the dark mound28 like a chaplet of bleached29 sku lls, and everything around was so quiet that whe
n I stood still all sound and all movement in the world seemed to come to an end.
'It was a great peace, as if the earth had been one grave, and for a time I stood there thinking mostly of the living who, buried in remote places out of the knowledge of mankind, still are fated to share in its tragic30 or grotesque31 miseries32. In its noble struggles too -who knows? The human heart is vast enough to contain all the world. It is valiant33 enough to bear the burden, but where is the courage that would cast it off?
'I suppose I must have fallen into a sentimental34 mood; I only know that I stood there long enough for the sense of utter solitude35 to get hold of me so completely that all I had lately seen, all I had heard, and the very human speech itself, seemed to have passed away out of existence, living only for a while longer in my memory, as though I had been the last of mankind. It was a strange and melancholy36 illusion, evolved half-consciously like all our illusions, which I suspect only to be visions of remote unattainable truth, seen dimly. This was, indeed, one of the lost, forgotten, unknown places of the earth; I had looked under its obscure surface; and I felt that when to-morrow I had left it for ever, it would slip out of existence, to live only in my memory till I myself passed into oblivion. I have that feeling about me now; perhaps it is that feeling which has incited37 me to tell you the story, to try to hand over to you, as it were, its very existence, its reality -- the truth disclosed in a moment of illusion.
'Cornelius broke upon it. He bolted out, vermin-like, from the long grass growing in a depression of the ground. I believe his house was rotting somewhere near by, though I've never seen it, not having been far enough in that direction. He ran towards me upon the path; his feet, shod in dirty white shoes, twinkled on the dark earth; he pulled himself up, and began to whine38 and cringe under a tall stove-pipe hat. His dried-up little carcass was swallowed up, totally lost, in a suit of black broadcloth. That was his costume for holidays and ceremonies, and it reminded me that this was the fourth Sunday I had spent in Patusan. All the time of my stay I had been vaguely39 aware of his desire to confide40 in me, if he only could get me all to himself. He hung about with an eager craving41 look on his sour yellow little face; but his timidity had kept him back as much as my natural reluctance42 to have anything to do with such an unsavoury creature. He would have succeeded, nevertheless, had he not been so ready to slink off as soon as you looked at him. He would slink off before Jim's severe gaze, before my own, which I tried to make indifferent, even before Tamb' Itam's surly, superior glance. He was perpetually slinking away; whenever seen he was seen moving off deviously43, his face over his shoulder, with either a mistrustful snarl44 or a woe-begone, piteous, mute aspect; but no assumed expression could conceal45 this innate46 irremediable abjectness47 of his nature, any more than an arrangement of clothing can conceal some monstrous48 deformity of the body.
'I don't know whether it was the demoralisation of my utter defeat in my encounter with a spectre of fear less than an hour ago, but I let him capture me without even a show of resistance. I was doomed49 to be the recipient50 of confidences, and to be confronted with unanswerable questions. It was trying; but the contempt, the unreasoned contempt, the man's appearance provoked, made it easier to bear. He couldn't possibly matter. Nothing mattered, since I had made up my mind that Jim, for whom alone I cared, had at last mastered his fate. He had told me he was satisfied . . . nearly. This is going further than most of us dare. I -- who have the right to think myself good enough -- dare not. Neither does any of you here, I suppose? . . .'
Marlow paused, as if expecting an answer. Nobody spoke51.
'Quite right,' he began again. 'Let no soul know, since the truth can be wrung52 out of us only by some cruel, little, awful catastrophe53. But he is one of us, and he could say he was satisfied . . . nearly. Just fancy this! Nearly satisfied. One could almost envy him his catastrophe. Nearly satisfied. After this nothing could matter. It did not matter who suspected him, who trusted him, who loved him, who hated him -- especially as it was Cornelius who hated him.
'Yet after all this was a kind of recognition. You shall judge of a man by his foes54 as well as by his friends, and this enemy of Jim was such as no decent man would be ashamed to own, without, however, making too much of him. This was the view Jim took, and in which I shared; but Jim disregarded him on general grounds. "My dear Marlow," he said, "I feel that if I go straight nothing can touch me. Indeed I do. Now you have been long enough here to have a good look round -- and, frankly55, don't you think I am pretty safe? It all depends upon me, and, by Jove! I have lots of confidence in myself. The worst thing he could do would be to kill me, I suppose. I don't think for a moment he would. He couldn't, you know -- not if I were myself to hand him a loaded rifle for the purpose, and then turn my back on him. That's the sort of thing he is. And suppose he would -- suppose he could? Well -- what of that? I didn't come here flying for my life -- did I? I came here to set my back against the wall, and I am going to stay here . . ."
' "Till you are quite satisfied," I struck in.
'We were sitting at the time under the roof in the stern of his boat; twenty paddles flashed like one, ten on a side, striking the water with a single splash, while behind our backs Tamb' Itam dipped silently right and left, and stared right down the river, attentive56 to keep the long canoe in the greatest strength of the current. Jim bowed his head, and our last talk seemed to flicker57 out for good. He was seeing me off as far as the mouth of the river. The schooner58 had left the day before, working down and drifting on the ebb59, while I had prolonged my stay overnight. And now he was seeing me off.
'Jim had been a little angry with me for mentioning Cornelius at all. I had not, in truth, said much. The man was too insignificant60 to be dangerous, though he was as full of hate as he could hold. He had called me "honourable61 sir" at every second sentence, and had whined62 at my elbow as he followed me from the grave of his "late wife" to the gate of Jim's compound. He declared himself the most unhappy of men, a victim, crushed like a worm; he entreated63 me to look at him. I wouldn't turn my head to do so; but I could see out of the corner of my eye his obsequious64 shadow gliding65 after mine, while the moon, suspended on our right hand, seemed to gloat serenely66 upon the spectacle. He tried to explain -- as I've told you -- his share in the events of the memorable67 night. It was a matter of expediency68. How could he know who was going to get the upper hand? "I would have saved him, honourable sir! I would have saved him for eighty dollars," he protested in dulcet69 tones, keeping a pace behind me. "He has saved himself," I said, "and he has forgiven you." I heard a sort of tittering, and turned upon him; at once he appeared ready to take to his heels. "What are you laughing at?" I asked, standing still. "Don't be deceived, honourable sir!" he shrieked70, seemingly losing all control over his feelings. "He save himself! He knows nothing, honourable sir -- nothing whatever. Who is he? What does he want here -- the big thief? What does he want here? He throws dust into everybody's eyes; he throws dust into your eyes, honourable sir; but he can't throw dust into my eyes. He is a big fool, honourable sir." I laughed contemptuously, and, turning on my heel, began to walk on again. He ran up to my elbow and whispered forcibly, "He's no more than a little child here -- like a little child -- a little child." Of course I didn't take the slightest notice, and seeing the time pressed, because we were approaching the bamboo fence that glittered over the blackened ground of the clearing , he came to the point. He commenced by being ab
jectly lachrymose71. His great misfortunes had affected72 his head. He hoped I would kindly73 forget what nothing but his troubles made him say. He didn't mean anything by it; only the honourable sir did not know what it was to be ruined, broken down, trampled74 upon. After this introduction he approached the matter near his heart, but in such a rambling76, ejaculatory, craven fashion, that for a long time I couldn't make out what he was driving at. He wanted me to intercede77 with Jim in his favour. It seemed, too, to be some sort of money affair. I heard time and again the words, "Moderate provision -- suitable present." He seemed to be claiming value for something, and he even went the length of saying with some warmth that life was not worth having if a man were to be robbed of everything. I did not breathe a word, of course, but neither did I stop my ears. The gist78 of the affair, which became clear to me gradually, was in this, that he rgarded himself as entitled to some money in exchange for the girl. He had brought her up. Somebody else's child. Great trouble and pains -- old man now -- suitable present. If the honourable sir would say a word.... I stood still to look at him with curiosity, and fearful lest I should think him extortionate, I suppose, he hastily brought himself to make a concession79. In consideration of a "suitable present" given at once, he would, he declared, be willing to undertake the charge of the girl, "without any other provision -- when the time came for the gentleman to go home." His little yellow face, all crumpled80 as though it had been squeezed together, expressed the most anxious, eager avarice81. His voice whined coaxingly82, "No more trouble -- natural guardian83 -- a sum of money . . . "
'I stood there and marvelled84. That kind of thing, with him, was evidently a vocation85. I discovered suddenly in his cringing86 attitude a sort of assurance, as though he had been all his life dealing87 in certitudes. He must have thought I was dispassionately considering his proposal, because he became as sweet as honey. "Every gentleman made a provision when the time came to go home,"he began insinuatingly88. I slammed the little gate. "In this case, Mr. Cornelius," I said, "the time will never come." He took a few seconds to gather this in. "What!"he fairly squealed89. "Why," I continued from my side of the gate,"haven't you heard him say so himself? He will nevergo home." "Oh! this is too much," he shouted. He would not address me as "honoured sir" any more. He was very still for a time, and then without a trace of humility90 began very low: "Never go -- ah! He -- he -- he comes here devil knows from where -- comes here -- devil knows why -to trample75 on me till I die -- ah -- trample" (he stamped softly with both feet), "trample like this -- nobody knows why -- till I die.. .. " His voice became quite extinct; he was bothered by a little cough; he came up close to the fence and told me, dropping into a confidential91 and piteous tone, that he would not be trampled upon. "Patience -patience," he muttered, striking his breast. I had done laughing at him, but unexpectedly he treated me to a wild cracked burst of it. "Ha! ha! ha! We shall see! We shall see! What! Steal from me! Steal from me everything! Everything! Everything! " His head drooped92 on one shoulder, his hands were hanging before him lightly clasped. One would have thought he had cherished the girl with surpassing love, that his spirit had been crushed and his heart broken by the most cruel of spoliations. Suddenly he lifted his head and shot out an infamous93 word. "Like her mother -- she is like her deceitful mother. Exactly. In her face too. In her face. The devil! " He leaned his forehead against the fence, and in that position uttered threats and horrible bl
asphemies in Portuguese94 in very weak ejaculations, mingled95 with miserable96 plaints and groans97, coming out with a heave of the shoulders as though he had been overtaken by a deadly fit of sickness. It was an inexpressibly grotesque and vile98 performance, and I hastened away. He tried to shout something after me. Some disparagement99 of Jim, I believe -- not too loud though, we were too near the house . All I heard distinctly was, "No more than a little child -- a little child." '
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1
cane
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| n.手杖，细长的茎，藤条；v.以杖击，以藤编制的 | |
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prone
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| adj.(to)易于…的，很可能…的；俯卧的 | |
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torpor
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| n.迟钝；麻木；（动物的）冬眠 | |
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negligently
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dice
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| n.骰子；vt.把（食物）切成小方块，冒险 | |
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scrupulous
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| adj.审慎的，小心翼翼的，完全的，纯粹的 | |
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anguish
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| n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼 | |
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inexplicable
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| adj.无法解释的，难理解的 | |
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conspiracy
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| n.阴谋，密谋，共谋 | |
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10
appalling
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| adj.骇人听闻的，令人震惊的，可怕的 | |
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standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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droll
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| adj.古怪的，好笑的 | |
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prematurely
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| adv.过早地，贸然地 | |
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chasm
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| n.深坑，断层，裂口，大分岐，利害冲突 | |
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precipice
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| n.悬崖，危急的处境 | |
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16
ascending
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| adj.上升的，向上的 | |
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leisurely
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| adj.悠闲的；从容的，慢慢的 | |
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rebound
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| v.弹回；n.弹回，跳回 | |
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19
tangle
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| n.纠缠；缠结；混乱；v.(使)缠绕；变乱 | |
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twigs
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| 细枝，嫩枝( twig的名词复数 ) | |
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cavern
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| n.洞穴，大山洞 | |
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stumps
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| （被砍下的树的）树桩( stump的名词复数 )； 残肢； （板球三柱门的）柱； 残余部分 | |
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23
solitary
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| adj.孤独的，独立的，荒凉的；n.隐士 | |
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destined
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| adj.命中注定的；(for)以…为目的地的 | |
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scent
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| n.气味，香味，香水，线索，嗅觉；v.嗅，发觉 | |
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fumes
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| n.(强烈而刺激的)气味，气体 | |
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incense
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| v.激怒；n.香，焚香时的烟，香气 | |
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28
mound
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| n.土墩，堤，小山；v.筑堤，用土堆防卫 | |
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bleached
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| 漂白的，晒白的，颜色变浅的 | |
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tragic
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| adj.悲剧的，悲剧性的，悲惨的 | |
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grotesque
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| adj.怪诞的，丑陋的；n.怪诞的图案，怪人（物） | |
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miseries
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| n.痛苦( misery的名词复数 )；痛苦的事；穷困；常发牢骚的人 | |
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valiant
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| adj.勇敢的，英勇的；n.勇士，勇敢的人 | |
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sentimental
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| adj.多愁善感的，感伤的 | |
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solitude
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| n. 孤独; 独居,荒僻之地,幽静的地方 | |
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melancholy
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| n.忧郁，愁思；adj.令人感伤（沮丧）的，忧郁的 | |
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incited
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| 刺激，激励，煽动( incite的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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whine
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| v.哀号，号哭；n.哀鸣 | |
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vaguely
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| adv.含糊地，暖昧地 | |
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confide
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| v.向某人吐露秘密 | |
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craving
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| n.渴望,热望 | |
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42
reluctance
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| n.厌恶，讨厌，勉强，不情愿 | |
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deviously
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| 弯曲地，绕道地 | |
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44
snarl
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| v.吼叫，怒骂，纠缠，混乱；n.混乱，缠结，咆哮 | |
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45
conceal
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| v.隐藏，隐瞒，隐蔽 | |
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46
innate
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| adj.天生的，固有的，天赋的 | |
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abjectness
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| 凄惨； 绝望； 卑鄙； 卑劣 | |
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monstrous
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| adj.巨大的；恐怖的；可耻的，丢脸的 | |
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49
doomed
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| 命定的 | |
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50
recipient
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| a.接受的,感受性强的 n.接受者,感受者,容器 | |
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51
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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52
wrung
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| 绞( wring的过去式和过去分词 )； 握紧（尤指别人的手）； 把（湿衣服）拧干； 绞掉（水） | |
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53
catastrophe
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| n.大灾难，大祸 | |
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54
foes
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| 敌人，仇敌( foe的名词复数 ) | |
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55
frankly
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| adv.坦白地，直率地；坦率地说 | |
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56
attentive
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| adj.注意的，专心的；关心(别人)的，殷勤的 | |
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57
flicker
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| vi./n.闪烁，摇曳，闪现 | |
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58
schooner
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| n.纵帆船 | |
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59
ebb
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| vi.衰退，减退；n.处于低潮，处于衰退状态 | |
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60
insignificant
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| adj.无关紧要的，可忽略的，无意义的 | |
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61
honourable
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| adj.可敬的；荣誉的，光荣的 | |
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62
whined
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| v.哀号( whine的过去式和过去分词 )；哀诉，诉怨 | |
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entreated
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| 恳求，乞求( entreat的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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obsequious
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| adj.谄媚的，奉承的，顺从的 | |
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gliding
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| v. 滑翔 adj. 滑动的 | |
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serenely
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| adv.安详地，宁静地，平静地 | |
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memorable
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| adj.值得回忆的，难忘的，特别的，显著的 | |
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expediency
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| n.适宜；方便；合算；利己 | |
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dulcet
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| adj.悦耳的 | |
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shrieked
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| v.尖叫( shriek的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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lachrymose
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| adj.好流泪的，引人落泪的；adv.眼泪地，哭泣地 | |
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affected
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| adj.不自然的，假装的 | |
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kindly
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| adj.和蔼的，温和的，爽快的；adv.温和地，亲切地 | |
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trampled
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| 踩( trample的过去式和过去分词 )； 践踏； 无视； 侵犯 | |
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trample
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| vt.踩，践踏；无视，伤害，侵犯 | |
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76
rambling
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| adj.[建]凌乱的，杂乱的 | |
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intercede
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| vi.仲裁，说情 | |
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gist
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| n.要旨；梗概 | |
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concession
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| n.让步，妥协；特许(权) | |
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crumpled
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| adj. 弯扭的, 变皱的 动词crumple的过去式和过去分词形式 | |
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avarice
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| n.贪婪；贪心 | |
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coaxingly
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| adv. 以巧言诱哄，以甘言哄骗 | |
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guardian
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| n.监护人；守卫者，保护者 | |
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marvelled
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| v.惊奇，对…感到惊奇( marvel的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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vocation
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| n.职业，行业 | |
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86
cringing
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| adj.谄媚，奉承 | |
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87
dealing
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| n.经商方法，待人态度 | |
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insinuatingly
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squealed
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| v.长声尖叫，用长而尖锐的声音说( squeal的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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humility
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| n.谦逊，谦恭 | |
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confidential
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| adj.秘（机）密的，表示信任的，担任机密工作的 | |
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drooped
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| 弯曲或下垂，发蔫( droop的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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infamous
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| adj.声名狼藉的，臭名昭著的，邪恶的 | |
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Portuguese
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| n.葡萄牙人；葡萄牙语 | |
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mingled
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| 混合，混入( mingle的过去式和过去分词 )； 混进，与…交往[联系] | |
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miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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groans
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| n.呻吟，叹息( groan的名词复数 )；呻吟般的声音v.呻吟( groan的第三人称单数 )；发牢骚；抱怨；受苦 | |
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vile
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| adj.卑鄙的，可耻的，邪恶的；坏透的 | |
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disparagement
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| n.轻视，轻蔑 | |
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