Section 4

For a time we say no more, and I fall musing¹ about my strange encounter with my Utopian double. I think of the confessions² I have just made to him, the strange admissions both to him and myself. I have stirred up the stagnations of my own emotional life, the pride that has slumbered³, the hopes and disappointments that have not troubled me for years. There are things that happened to me in my adolescence⁴ that no discipline of reason will ever bring to a just proportion for me, the first humiliations I was made to suffer, the waste of all the fine irrecoverable loyalties⁵ and passions of my youth. The dull base caste of my little personal tragi-comedy — I have ostensibly forgiven, I have for the most part forgotten — and yet when I recall them I hate each actor still. Whenever it comes into my mind — I do my best to prevent it — there it is, and these detestable people blot⁶ out the stars for me.

I have told all that story to my double, and he has listened with understanding eyes. But for a little while those squalid memories will not sink back into the deeps.

We lean, side by side, over our balcony, lost in such egotistical absorptions, quite heedless of the great palace of noble dreams to which our first enterprise has brought us.

1 musing   

n. 沉思，冥想 adj. 沉思的, 冥想的 动词muse的现在分词形式

参考例句：

• "At Tellson's banking-house at nine," he said, with a musing face. “九点在台尔森银行大厦见面，”他想道。 来自英汉文学 - 双城记
• She put the jacket away, and stood by musing a minute. 她把那件上衣放到一边，站着沉思了一会儿。

2 confessions   

n.承认( confession的名词复数 )；自首；声明；（向神父的）忏悔

参考例句：

• It is strictly forbidden to obtain confessions and to give them credence. 严禁逼供信。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》
• Neither trickery nor coercion is used to secure confessions. 既不诱供也不逼供。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

3 slumbered   

微睡，睡眠（slumber的过去式与过去分词形式）

参考例句：

• The baby slumbered in his cradle. 婴儿安睡在摇篮中。
• At that time my virtue slumbered; my evil, kept awake by ambition. 就在那时，我的善的一面睡着了，我的邪恶面因野心勃勃而清醒着。

4 adolescence   

n.青春期，青少年

参考例句：

• Adolescence is the process of going from childhood to maturity.青春期是从少年到成年的过渡期。
• The film is about the trials and tribulations of adolescence.这部电影讲述了青春期的麻烦和苦恼。

5 loyalties   

n.忠诚( loyalty的名词复数 )；忠心；忠于…感情；要忠于…的强烈感情

参考例句：

• an intricate network of loyalties and relationships 忠诚与义气构成的盘根错节的网络
• Rows with one's in-laws often create divided loyalties. 与姻亲之间的矛盾常常让人两面为难。 来自《简明英汉词典》

6 blot   

vt.弄脏（用吸墨纸）吸干；n.污点，污渍

参考例句：

• That new factory is a blot on the landscape.那新建的工厂破坏了此地的景色。
• The crime he committed is a blot on his record.他犯的罪是他的履历中的一个污点。