Book IX Chapter 10

Should we, then, make as many friends as possible, or-as in the case of hospitality it is thought to be suitable advice, that one should be ‘neither a man of many guests nor a man with none’-will that apply to friendship as well; should a man neither be friendless nor have an excessive number of friends?

To friends made with a view to utility this saying would seem thoroughly¹ applicable; for to do services to many people in return is a laborious² task and life is not long enough for its performance. Therefore friends in excess of those who are sufficient for our own life are superfluous³, and hindrances⁴ to the noble life; so that we have no need of them. Of friends made with a view to pleasure, also, few are enough, as a little seasoning⁵ in food is enough.

But as regards good friends, should we have as many as possible, or is there a limit to the number of one’s friends, as there is to the size of a city? You cannot make a city of ten men, and if there are a hundred thousand it is a city no longer. But the proper number is presumably not a single number, but anything that falls between certain fixed⁶ points. So for friends too there is a fixed number perhaps the largest number with whom one can live together (for that, we found, thought to be very characteristic of friendship); and that one cannot live with many people and divide oneself up among them is plain. Further, they too must be friends of one another, if they are all to spend their days together; and it is a hard business for this condition to be fulfilled with a large number. It is found difficult, too, to rejoice and to grieve in an intimate way with many people, for it may likely happen that one has at once to be happy with one friend and to mourn with another. Presumably, then, it is well not to seek to have as many friends as possible, but as many as are enough for the purpose of living together; for it would seem actually impossible to be a great friend to many people. This is why one cannot love several people; love is ideally a sort of excess of friendship, and that can only be felt towards one person; therefore great friendship too can only be felt towards a few people. This seems to be confirmed in practice; for we do not find many people who are friends in the comradely way of friendship, and the famous friendships of this sort are always between two people. Those who have many friends and mix intimately with them all are thought to be no one’s friend, except in the way proper to fellow-citizens, and such people are also called obsequious⁷. In the way proper to fellow-citizens, indeed, it is possible to be the friend of many and yet not be obsequious but a genuinely good man; but one cannot have with many people the friendship based on virtue⁸ and on the character of our friends themselves, and we must be content if we find even a few such.

1 thoroughly   

adv.完全地，彻底地，十足地

参考例句：

• The soil must be thoroughly turned over before planting.一定要先把土地深翻一遍再下种。
• The soldiers have been thoroughly instructed in the care of their weapons.士兵们都系统地接受过保护武器的训练。

2 laborious   

adj.吃力的，努力的，不流畅

参考例句：

• They had the laborious task of cutting down the huge tree.他们接受了伐大树的艰苦工作。
• Ants and bees are laborious insects.蚂蚁与蜜蜂是勤劳的昆虫。

3 superfluous   

adj.过多的，过剩的，多余的

参考例句：

• She fined away superfluous matter in the design. 她删去了这图案中多余的东西。
• That request seemed superfluous when I wrote it.我这样写的时候觉得这个请求似乎是多此一举。

4 hindrances   

阻碍者( hindrance的名词复数 )； 障碍物； 受到妨碍的状态

参考例句：

• She also speaks out against the traditional hindrances to freedom. 她甚至大声疾呼，反对那些阻挡自由的、统礼教的绊脚石。
• When this stage is reached then the hindrances and karma are overcome. 唯此状态达到后，则超越阻碍和因果。

5 seasoning   

n.调味；调味料；增添趣味之物

参考例句：

• Salt is the most common seasoning.盐是最常用的调味品。
• This sauce uses mushroom as its seasoning.这酱油用蘑菇作调料。

6 fixed   

adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的

参考例句：

• Have you two fixed on a date for the wedding yet?你们俩选定婚期了吗？
• Once the aim is fixed,we should not change it arbitrarily.目标一旦确定，我们就不应该随意改变。

7 obsequious   

adj.谄媚的，奉承的，顺从的

参考例句：

• He looked at the two ladies with an obsequious air.他看着两位太太,满脸谄媚的神情。
• He was obsequious to his superiors,but he didn't get any favor.他巴结上司，但没得到任何好处。

8 virtue   

n.德行，美德；贞操；优点；功效，效力

参考例句：

• He was considered to be a paragon of virtue.他被认为是品德尽善尽美的典范。
• You need to decorate your mind with virtue.你应该用德行美化心灵。