MARIANNE, who had never much toleration for any thing like impertinence, vulgarity, inferiority of parts, or even difference of taste from herself, was at this time particularly ill-disposed, from the state of her spirits, to be pleased with the Misses Steele, or to encourage their advances; and to the invariable coldness of her behaviour towards them, which checked every endeavour at intimacy1 on their side, Elinor principally attributed that preference of herself which soon became evident in the manners of both, but especially of Lucy, who missed no opportunity of engaging her in conversation, or of striving to improve their acquaintance by an easy and frank communication of her sentiments.
Lucy was naturally clever; her remarks were often just and amusing; and as a companion for half an hour Elinor frequently found her agreeable; but her powers had received no aid from education: she was ignorant and illiterate2; and her deficiency of all mental improvement, her want of information in the most common particulars, could not be concealed3 from Miss Dashwood, in spite of her constant endeavour to appear to advantage. Elinor saw, and pitied her for the neglect of abilities which education might have rendered so respectable; but she saw, with less tenderness of feeling, the thorough want of delicacy4, of rectitude, and integrity of mind, which her attentions, her assiduities, her flatteries at the Park betrayed; and she could have no lasting5 satisfaction in the company of a person who joined insincerity with ignorance; whose want of instruction prevented their meeting in conversation on terms of equality, and whose conduct toward others made every show of attention and deference6 towards herself perfectly7 valueless. "You will think my question an odd one, I dare say," said Lucy to her one day, as they were walking together from the Park to the cottage; "but, pray, are you personally acquainted with your sister-in-law's mother, Mrs. Ferrars?" Elinor did think the question a very odd one, and her countenance8 expressed it, as she answered that she had never seen Mrs. Ferrars. "Indeed!" replied Lucy; "I wonder at that, for I thought you must have seen her at Norland sometimes. Then, perhaps, you cannot tell me what sort of a woman she is?" "No," returned Elinor, cautious of giving her real opinion of Edward's mother, and not very desirious of satisfying what seemed impertinent curiosity; "I know nothing of her." "I am sure you think me very strange, for enquiring9 about her in such a way," said Lucy, eyeing Elinor attentively10 as she spoke11; "but perhaps there may be reasons- I wish I might venture; but, however, I hope you will do me the justice of believing that I do not mean to be impertinent." Elinor made her
a civil reply, and they walked on for a few minutes in silence. It was broken by Lucy, who renewed the subject again by saying, with some hesitation,"I cannot bear to have you think me impertinently curious. I am sure I would rather do any thing in the world than be thought so by a person whose good opinion is so well worth having as yours. And I am sure I should not have the smallest fear of trusting you; indeed, I should be very glad of your advice how to manage in such and uncomfortable situation as I am; but, however, there is no occasion to trouble you. I am sorry you do not happen to know Mrs. Ferrars." "I am sorry I do not," said Elinor, in great astonishment12, "if it could be of any use to you to know my opinion of her. But really I never understood that you were at all connected with that family, and therefore I am a little surprised, I confess, at so serious an inquiry13 into her character." "I dare say you are, and I am sure I do not at all wonder at it. But if I dared tell you all, you would not be so much surprised. Mrs. Ferrars is certainly nothing to me at present; but the time may come- how soon it will come must depend upon herself- when we may be very intimately connected." She looked down as she said this, amiably14 bashful, with only one side glance at her companion to observe its effect on her. "Good heavens!" cried Elinor, "what do you mean? Are you acquainted with Mr. Robert Ferrars? Can you be?" And she did not feel much delighted with the idea of such a sister-in-law. "No," replied Lucy, "not to Mr. Robert Ferrars- I never saw him in my life; but," fixing her eyes upon Elinor, "to his eldest15 brother." What felt Elinor at that moment? Astonishment, that would have been as painful as it was strong, had not an immediate16 disbelief of the assertion attended it. She turned towards Lucy in silent amazement17, unable to divine the reason or object of such a declaration; and though her complexion18 varied19, she stood firm in incredulity, and felt in no danger of an hysterical20 fit or a swoon. "You may well b
e surprised," continued Lucy; "for to be sure you could have had no idea of it before; for I dare say he never dropped the smallest hint of it to you or any of your family; because it was always meant to be a great secret, and I am sure has been faithfully kept so by me to this hour. Not a soul of all my relations know of it but Anne, and I never should have mentioned it to you, if I had not felt the greatest dependence21 in the world upon your secrecy22; and I really thought my behaviour in asking so many questions about Mrs. Ferrars must seem so odd, that it ought to be explained. And I do not think Mr. Ferrars can be displeased23, when he knows I have trusted you, because I know he has the highest opinion in the world of all your family, and looks upon yourself and the other Misses Dashwood quite as his own sisters." She paused.
Elinor for a few moments remained silent. Her astonishment at what she heard was at first too great for words; but at length forcing herself to speak, and to speak cautiously, she said, with calmness of manner which tolerably well concealed her surprise and solicitude,"May I ask if your engagement is of long standing24?" "We have been engaged these four years." "Four years!" "Yes." Elinor, though greatly shocked, still felt unable to believe it. "I did not know," said she, "that you were even acquainted till the other day." "Our acquaintance, however, is of many years' date. He was under my uncle's care, you know, a considerable while." "Your uncle!" "Yes; Mr. Pratt. Did you never hear him talk of Mr. Pratt?" "I think I have," replied Elinor, with an exertion25 of spirits, which increased with her increase of emotion. "He was four years with my uncle, who lives at Longstaple, near Plymouth. It was there our acquaintance begun, for my sister and me was often staying with my uncle, and it was there our engagement was formed, though not till a year after he had quitted as a pupil; but he was almost always with us afterwards. I was very unwilling26 to enter into it, as you may imagine, without the knowledge and approbation27 of his mother; but I was too young, and loved him too well, to be so prudent28 as I ought to have been. Though you do not know him so well as me, Miss Dashwood, you must have seen enough of him to be sensible he is very capable of making a woman sincerely attached to him." "Certainly," answered Elinor, without knowing what she said; but after a moment's reflection, she added, with revived security of Edward's honour and love, and her companion's falsehood, "Engaged to Mr. Edward Ferrars!- I confess myself so totally surprised at what you tell me, that really- I beg your pardon; but surely there must be some mistake of person or name. We cannot mean the same Mr. Ferrars." "We can mean no other," cried Lucy, smiling. "Mr. Edward Ferrars, the eldest son of Mrs. Ferrars, of Park Street, and brother of your sis
ter-in-law, Mrs. John Dashwood is the person I mean; you must allow that I am not likely to be deceived as to the name of the man on whom all my happiness depends." "It is strange," replied Elinor, in a most painful perplexity, "that I should never have heard him even mention your name." "No; considering our situation, it was not strange. Our first care has been to keep the matter secret. You knew nothing of me, or my family, and, therefore, there could be no occasion for ever mentioning my name to you; and, as he was always particularly afraid of his sister's suspecting any thing, that was reason enough for his not mentioning it." She was silent. Elinor's security sunk; but her self-command did not sink with it. "Four years you have been engaged," said she, with a firm voice. "Yes; and heaven knows how much longer we may have to wait. Poor Edward! It puts him quite out of heart." Then taking a small miniature from her pocket, she added, "To prevent the possibility of mistake, be so good as to look at this face. It does not do him justice, to be sure, but yet I think you cannot be deceived as to the person it was drew for. I have had it above these three years." She put it into her hands as she spoke; and when Elinor saw the painting, whatever other doubts her fear of a too hasty decision, or her wish of detecting falsehood, might suffer to linger in her mind, she could have none of its being Edward's face. She returned it almost instantly, acknowledging the likeness29. "I have never been able," continued Lucy, "to give him my picture in return, which I am very much vexed30 at, for he has been always so anxious to get it! But I am determined31 to sit for it the very first opportunity." "You are quite in the right," replied Elinor, calmly. They then proceeded a few paces in silence. Lucy spoke first. "I am sure," said she, "I have no doubt in the world of your faithfully keeping this secret, because you must know of what importance it is to us, not to have it reach his mother; for she would never approve of it, I dare s
ay. I shall have no fortune, and I fancy she is an exceeding proud woman." "I certainly did not seek your confidence," said Elinor; "but you do me no more than justice in imagining that I may be depended on. Your secret is safe with me; but pardon me if I express some surprise at so unnecessary a communication. You must at least have felt that my being acquainted with it could not add to its safety." As she said this, she looked earnestly at Lucy, hoping to discover something in her countenance; perhaps the falsehood of the greatest part of what she had been saying; but Lucy's countenance suffered no change. "I was afraid you would think I was taking a great liberty with you," said she, "in telling you all this. I have not known you long, to be sure, personally at least, but I have known you and all your family by description a great while; and as soon as I saw you, I felt almost as if you was an old acquaintance. Besides, in the present case, I really thought some explanation was due to you, after my making such particular enquiries about Edward's mother; and I am so unfortunate, that I have not a creature whose advice I can ask. Anne is the only person that knows of it, and she has no judgment32 at all; indeed, she does me a great deal more harm than good, for I am in constant fear of her betraying me. She does not know how to hold her tongue, as you must perceive; and I am sure I was in the greatest fright in the world the other day, when Edward's name was mentioned by Sir John, lest she should out with it all. You can't think how much I go through in my mind from it altogether. I only wonder that I am alive, after what I have suffered for Edward's sake these last four years. Every thing in such suspense33 and uncertainty34; and seeing him so seldom- we can hardly meet above twice a year. I am sure I wonder my heart is not quite broke." Here she took out her handkerchief; but Elinor did not feel very compassionate35. "Sometimes." continued Lucy, after wiping her eyes, "I think whether it would not be better for us bot
h to break off the matter entirely36." As she said this, she looked directly at her companion. "But then, at other times, I have not resolution enough for it. I cannot bear the thoughts of making him so miserable37, as I know the very mention of such a thing would do. And on my own account too- so dear as he is to me- I don't think I could be equal to it. What would you advise me to do in such a case, Miss Dashwood? What would you do yourself?" "Pardon me," replied Elinor, startled by the question; "but I can give you no advice under such circumstances. Your own judgment must direct you." "To be sure," continued Lucy, after a few minutes' silence on both sides, "his mother must provide for him some time or other; but poor Edward is so cast down by it! Did you not think him dreadful low-spirited when he was at Barton? He was so miserable when he left us at Longstaple, to go to you, that I was afraid you would think him quite ill." "Did he come from your uncle's, then, when he visited us?" "Oh, yes; he had been staying a fortnight with us. Did you think he came directly from town?" "No," replied Elinor, most feelingly sensible of every fresh circumstance in favour of Lucy's veracity38; "I remember he told us, that he had been staying a fortnight with some friends near Plymouth." She remembered, too, her own surprise at the time, at his mentioning nothing farther of those friends, at his total silence with respect even to their names. "Did not you think him sadly out of spirits?" repeated Lucy. "We did, indeed, particularly so when he first arrived." "I begged him to exert himself for fear you should suspect what was the matter; but it made him so melancholy39, not being able to stay more than a fortnight with us, but it with us, and seeing me so much affected40. Poor fellow! I am afraid it is just the same with him how; for he writes in wretched spirits. I heard from him just before I left Exeter;" taking a letter from her pocket, and carelessly showing the direction to Elinor. "You know his hand, I dare say,- a charming one
it is; but that is not written so well as usual. He was tired, I dare say, for he had just filled the sheet to me as full as possible." Elinor saw that it was his hand, and she could doubt no longer. This picture, she had allowed herself to believe, might have been accidentally obtained; it might not have been Edward's gift; but a correspondence between them by letter could subsist41 only under a positive engagement, could be authorised by nothing else: for a few moments she was almost overcome- her heart sunk within her, and she could hardly stand; but exertion was indispensably necessary; and she struggled so resolutely42 against the oppression of her feelings, that her success was speedy, and for the time complete. "Writing to each other," said Lucy, returning the letter into her pocket, "is the only comfort we have in such long separations. Yes, I have one other comfort in his picture, but poor Edward has not even that. If he had but my picture, he says he should be easy. I gave him a lock of my hair set in a ring when he was at Longstaple last, and that was some comfort to him, he said, but not equal to a picture. Perhaps you might notice the ring when you saw him?" "I did," said Elinor, with a composure of voice, under which was concealed an emotion and distress43 beyond any thing she had ever felt before. She was mortified44, shocked, confounded. Fortunately for her, they had now reached the cottage, and the conversation could be continued no farther. After sitting with them a few minutes, the Misses Steeles returned to the Park, and Elinor was then at liberty to think and be wretched.
1 intimacy | |
n.熟悉,亲密,密切关系,亲昵的言行 | |
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2 illiterate | |
adj.文盲的;无知的;n.文盲 | |
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3 concealed | |
a.隐藏的,隐蔽的 | |
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4 delicacy | |
n.精致,细微,微妙,精良;美味,佳肴 | |
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5 lasting | |
adj.永久的,永恒的;vbl.持续,维持 | |
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6 deference | |
n.尊重,顺从;敬意 | |
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7 perfectly | |
adv.完美地,无可非议地,彻底地 | |
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8 countenance | |
n.脸色,面容;面部表情;vt.支持,赞同 | |
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9 enquiring | |
a.爱打听的,显得好奇的 | |
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10 attentively | |
adv.聚精会神地;周到地;谛;凝神 | |
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11 spoke | |
n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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12 astonishment | |
n.惊奇,惊异 | |
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13 inquiry | |
n.打听,询问,调查,查问 | |
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14 amiably | |
adv.和蔼可亲地,亲切地 | |
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15 eldest | |
adj.最年长的,最年老的 | |
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16 immediate | |
adj.立即的;直接的,最接近的;紧靠的 | |
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17 amazement | |
n.惊奇,惊讶 | |
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18 complexion | |
n.肤色;情况,局面;气质,性格 | |
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19 varied | |
adj.多样的,多变化的 | |
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20 hysterical | |
adj.情绪异常激动的,歇斯底里般的 | |
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21 dependence | |
n.依靠,依赖;信任,信赖;隶属 | |
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22 secrecy | |
n.秘密,保密,隐蔽 | |
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23 displeased | |
a.不快的 | |
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24 standing | |
n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的 | |
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25 exertion | |
n.尽力,努力 | |
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26 unwilling | |
adj.不情愿的 | |
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27 approbation | |
n.称赞;认可 | |
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28 prudent | |
adj.谨慎的,有远见的,精打细算的 | |
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29 likeness | |
n.相像,相似(之处) | |
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30 vexed | |
adj.争论不休的;(指问题等)棘手的;争论不休的问题;烦恼的v.使烦恼( vex的过去式和过去分词 );使苦恼;使生气;详细讨论 | |
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31 determined | |
adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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32 judgment | |
n.审判;判断力,识别力,看法,意见 | |
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33 suspense | |
n.(对可能发生的事)紧张感,担心,挂虑 | |
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34 uncertainty | |
n.易变,靠不住,不确知,不确定的事物 | |
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35 compassionate | |
adj.有同情心的,表示同情的 | |
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36 entirely | |
ad.全部地,完整地;完全地,彻底地 | |
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37 miserable | |
adj.悲惨的,痛苦的;可怜的,糟糕的 | |
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38 veracity | |
n.诚实 | |
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39 melancholy | |
n.忧郁,愁思;adj.令人感伤(沮丧)的,忧郁的 | |
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40 affected | |
adj.不自然的,假装的 | |
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41 subsist | |
vi.生存,存在,供养 | |
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42 resolutely | |
adj.坚决地,果断地 | |
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43 distress | |
n.苦恼,痛苦,不舒适;不幸;vt.使悲痛 | |
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44 mortified | |
v.使受辱( mortify的过去式和过去分词 );伤害(人的感情);克制;抑制(肉体、情感等) | |
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