Chapter 5 Turning a New Leaf

My mistress being dead, and I once more alone, I had to look out for a new place. About this time I might be a little — a very little — shaken in nerves. I grant I was not looking well, but, on the contrary, thin, haggard, and hollow-eyed; like a sitter-up at night, like an overwrought servant, or a placeless person in debt. In debt, however, I was not; nor quite poor; for though Miss Marchmont had not had time to benefit me, as, on that last night, she said she intended, yet, after the funeral, my wages were duly paid by her second cousin, the heir, an avaricious-looking man, with pinched nose and narrow temples, who, indeed, I heard long afterwards, turned out a thorough miser¹: a direct contrast to his generous kinswoman, and a foil to her memory, blessed to this day by the poor and needy². The possessor, then, of fifteen pounds; of health, though worn, not broken, and of a spirit in similar condition; I might still; in comparison with many people, be regarded as occupying an enviable position. An embarrassing one it was, however, at the same time; as I felt with some acuteness on a certain day, of which the corresponding one in the next week was to see my departure from my present abode³, while with another I was not provided.

In this dilemma⁴ I went, as a last and sole resource, to see and consult an old servant of our family; once my nurse, now housekeeper⁵ at a grand mansion⁶ not far from Miss Marchmont’s. I spent some hours with her; she comforted, but knew not how to advise me. Still all inward darkness, I left her about twilight⁷; a walk of two miles lay before me; it was a clear, frosty night. In spite of my solitude⁸, my poverty, and my perplexity, my heart, nourished and nerved with the vigour⁹ of a youth that had not yet counted twenty-three summers, beat light and not feebly. Not feebly, I am sure, or I should have trembled in that lonely walk, which lay through still fields, and passed neither village nor farmhouse¹⁰, nor cottage: I should have quailed¹¹ in the absence of moonlight, for it was by the leading of stars only I traced the dim path; I should have quailed still more in the unwonted presence of that which to-night shone in the north, a moving mystery — the Aurora¹² Borealis. But this solemn stranger influenced me otherwise than through my fears. Some new power it seemed to bring. I drew in energy with the keen, low breeze that blew on its path. A bold thought was sent to my mind; my mind was made strong to receive it.

“Leave this wilderness¹³,” it was said to me, “and go out hence.”

“Where?” was the query¹⁴.

I had not very far to look; gazing from this country parish in that flat, rich middle of England — I mentally saw within reach what I had never yet beheld¹⁵ with my bodily eyes: I saw London.

The next day I returned to the hall, and asking once more to see the housekeeper, I communicated to her my plan.

Mrs. Barrett was a grave, judicious¹⁶ woman, though she knew little more of the world than myself; but grave and judicious as she was, she did not charge me with being out of my senses; and, indeed, I had a staid manner of my own which ere now had been as good to me as cloak and hood¹⁷ of hodden grey, since under its favour I had been enabled to achieve with impunity¹⁸, and even approbation¹⁹, deeds that, if attempted with an excited and unsettled air, would in some minds have stamped me as a dreamer and zealot.

The housekeeper was slowly propounding²⁰ some difficulties, while she prepared orange-rind for marmalade, when a child ran past the window and came bounding into the room. It was a pretty child, and as it danced, laughing, up to me — for we were not strangers (nor, indeed, was its mother — a young married daughter of the house — a stranger)— I took it on my knee.

Different as were our social positions now, this child’s mother and I had been schoolfellows, when I was a girl of ten and she a young lady of sixteen; and I remembered her, good-looking, but dull, in a lower class than mine.

I was admiring the boy’s handsome dark eyes, when the mother, young Mrs. Leigh, entered. What a beautiful and kind-looking woman was the good-natured and comely²¹, but unintellectual, girl become! Wifehood and maternity²² had changed her thus, as I have since seen them change others even less promising²³ than she. Me she had forgotten. I was changed too, though not, I fear, for the better. I made no attempt to recall myself to her memory; why should I? She came for her son to accompany her in a walk, and behind her followed a nurse, carrying an infant. I only mention the incident because, in addressing the nurse, Mrs. Leigh spoke²⁴ French (very bad French, by the way, and with an incorrigibly²⁵ bad accent, again forcibly reminding me of our school-days): and I found the woman was a foreigner. The little boy chattered²⁶ volubly in French too. When the whole party were withdrawn²⁸, Mrs. Barrett remarked that her young lady had brought that foreign nurse home with her two years ago, on her return from a Continental²⁹ excursion; that she was treated almost as well as a governess, and had nothing to do but walk out with the baby and chatter²⁷ French with Master Charles; “and,” added Mrs. Barrett, “she says there are many Englishwomen in foreign families as well placed as she.”

I stored up this piece of casual information, as careful housewives store seemingly worthless shreds³⁰ and fragments for which their prescient minds anticipate a possible use some day. Before I left my old friend, she gave me the address of a respectable old-fashioned inn in the City, which, she said, my uncles used to frequent in former days.

In going to London, I ran less risk and evinced less enterprise than the reader may think. In fact, the distance was only fifty miles. My means would suffice both to take me there, to keep me a few days, and also to bring me back if I found no inducement to stay. I regarded it as a brief holiday, permitted for once to work-weary faculties³¹, rather than as an adventure of life and death. There is nothing like taking all you do at a moderate estimate: it keeps mind and body tranquil³²; whereas grandiloquent³³ notions are apt to hurry both into fever.

Fifty miles were then a day’s journey (for I speak of a time gone by: my hair, which, till a late period, withstood the frosts of time, lies now, at last white, under a white cap, like snow beneath snow). About nine o’clock of a wet February night I reached London.

My reader, I know, is one who would not thank me for an elaborate reproduction of poetic³⁴ first impressions; and it is well, inasmuch as I had neither time nor mood to cherish such; arriving as I did late, on a dark, raw, and rainy evening, in a Babylon and a wilderness, of which the vastness and the strangeness tried to the utmost any powers of clear thought and steady self-possession with which, in the absence of more brilliant faculties, Nature might have gifted me.

When I left the coach, the strange speech of the cabmen and others waiting round, seemed to me odd as a foreign tongue. I had never before heard the English language chopped up in that way. However, I managed to understand and to be understood, so far as to get myself and trunk safely conveyed to the old inn whereof I had the address. How difficult, how oppressive, how puzzling seemed my flight! In London for the first time; at an inn for the first time; tired with travelling; confused with darkness; palsied with cold; unfurnished with either experience or advice to tell me how to act, and yet — to act obliged.

Into the hands of common sense I confided³⁵ the matter. Common sense, however, was as chilled and bewildered as all my other faculties, and it was only under the spur of an inexorable necessity that she spasmodically executed her trust. Thus urged, she paid the porter: considering the crisis, I did not blame her too much that she was hugely cheated; she asked the waiter for a room; she timorously³⁶ called for the chambermaid; what is far more, she bore, without being wholly overcome, a highly supercilious³⁷ style of demeanour from that young lady, when she appeared.

I recollect³⁸ this same chambermaid was a pattern of town prettiness and smartness. So trim her waist, her cap, her dress — I wondered how they had all been manufactured. Her speech had an accent which in its mincing³⁹ glibness⁴⁰ seemed to rebuke⁴¹ mine as by authority; her spruce attire⁴² flaunted⁴³ an easy scorn to my plain country garb⁴⁴.

“Well, it can’t be helped,” I thought, “and then the scene is new, and the circumstances; I shall gain good.”

Maintaining a very quiet manner towards this arrogant⁴⁵ little maid, and subsequently observing the same towards the parsonic-looking, black-coated, white-neckclothed waiter, I got civility from them ere long. I believe at first they thought I was a servant; but in a little while they changed their minds, and hovered⁴⁶ in a doubtful state between patronage⁴⁷ and politeness.

I kept up well till I had partaken of some refreshment⁴⁸, warmed myself by a fire, and was fairly shut into my own room; but, as I sat down by the bed and rested my head and arms on the pillow, a terrible oppression overcame me. All at once my position rose on me like a ghost. Anomalous⁴⁹, desolate⁵⁰, almost blank of hope it stood. What was I doing here alone in great London? What should I do on the morrow? What prospects⁵¹ had I in life? What friends had I on, earth? Whence did I come? Whither should I go? What should I do?

I wet the pillow, my arms, and my hair, with rushing tears. A dark interval⁵² of most bitter thought followed this burst; but I did not regret the step taken, nor wish to retract⁵³ it A strong, vague persuasion⁵⁴ that it was better to go forward than backward, and that I could go forward — that a way, however narrow and difficult, would in time open — predominated over other feelings: its influence hushed them so far, that at last I became sufficiently⁵⁵ tranquil to be able to say my prayers and seek my couch. I had just extinguished my candle and lain down, when a deep, low, mighty⁵⁶ tone swung through the night. At first I knew it not; but it was uttered twelve times, and at the twelfth colossal⁵⁷ hum and trembling knell⁵⁸, I said: “I lie in the shadow of St. Paul’s.”

1 miser   

n.守财奴，吝啬鬼 (adj.miserly)

参考例句：

• The miser doesn't like to part with his money.守财奴舍不得花他的钱。
• The demon of greed ruined the miser's happiness.贪得无厌的恶习毁掉了那个守财奴的幸福。

2 needy   

adj.贫穷的，贫困的，生活艰苦的

参考例句：

• Although he was poor,he was quite generous to his needy friends.他虽穷，但对贫苦的朋友很慷慨。
• They awarded scholarships to needy students.他们给贫苦学生颁发奖学金。

3 abode   

n.住处，住所

参考例句：

• It was ten months before my father discovered his abode.父亲花了十个月的功夫，才好不容易打听到他的住处。
• Welcome to our humble abode!欢迎光临寒舍！

4 dilemma   

n.困境，进退两难的局面

参考例句：

• I am on the horns of a dilemma about the matter.这件事使我进退两难。
• He was thrown into a dilemma.他陷入困境。

5 housekeeper   

n.管理家务的主妇，女管家

参考例句：

• A spotless stove told us that his mother is a diligent housekeeper.炉子清洁无瑕就表明他母亲是个勤劳的主妇。
• She is an economical housekeeper and feeds her family cheaply.她节约持家，一家人吃得很省。

6 mansion   

n.大厦，大楼；宅第

参考例句：

• The old mansion was built in 1850.这座古宅建于1850年。
• The mansion has extensive grounds.这大厦四周的庭园广阔。

7 twilight   

n.暮光，黄昏；暮年，晚期，衰落时期

参考例句：

• Twilight merged into darkness.夕阳的光辉融于黑暗中。
• Twilight was sweet with the smell of lilac and freshly turned earth.薄暮充满紫丁香和新翻耕的泥土的香味。

8 solitude   

n. 孤独; 独居,荒僻之地,幽静的地方

参考例句：

• People need a chance to reflect on spiritual matters in solitude. 人们需要独处的机会来反思精神上的事情。
• They searched for a place where they could live in solitude. 他们寻找一个可以过隐居生活的地方。

9 vigour   

（=vigor）n.智力，体力，精力

参考例句：

• She is full of vigour and enthusiasm.她有热情，有朝气。
• At 40,he was in his prime and full of vigour.他40岁时正年富力强。

10 farmhouse   

n.农场住宅（尤指主要住房）

参考例句：

• We fell for the farmhouse as soon as we saw it.我们对那所农舍一见倾心。
• We put up for the night at a farmhouse.我们在一间农舍投宿了一夜。

11 quailed   

害怕，发抖，畏缩( quail的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• I quailed at the danger. 我一遇到危险，心里就发毛。
• His heart quailed before the enormous pyramidal shape. 面对这金字塔般的庞然大物，他的心不由得一阵畏缩。 来自英汉文学

12 aurora   

n.极光

参考例句：

• The aurora is one of nature's most awesome spectacles.极光是自然界最可畏的奇观之一。
• Over the polar regions we should see aurora.在极地高空,我们会看到极光。

13 wilderness   

n.杳无人烟的一片陆地、水等，荒漠

参考例句：

• She drove the herd of cattle through the wilderness.她赶着牛群穿过荒野。
• Education in the wilderness is not a matter of monetary means.荒凉地区的教育不是钱财问题。

14 query   

n.疑问，问号，质问；vt.询问，表示怀疑

参考例句：

• I query very much whether it is wise to act so hastily.我真怀疑如此操之过急地行动是否明智。
• They raised a query on his sincerity.他们对他是否真诚提出质疑。

15 beheld   

v.看，注视( behold的过去式和过去分词 )；瞧；看呀；（叙述中用于引出某人意外的出现）哎哟

参考例句：

• His eyes had never beheld such opulence. 他从未见过这样的财富。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The soul beheld its features in the mirror of the passing moment. 灵魂在逝去的瞬间的镜子中看到了自己的模样。 来自英汉文学 - 红字

16 judicious   

adj.明智的，明断的，能作出明智决定的

参考例句：

• We should listen to the judicious opinion of that old man.我们应该听取那位老人明智的意见。
• A judicious parent encourages his children to make their own decisions.贤明的父亲鼓励儿女自作抉择。

17 hood   

n.头巾，兜帽，覆盖；v.罩上，以头巾覆盖

参考例句：

• She is wearing a red cloak with a hood.她穿着一件红色带兜帽的披风。
• The car hood was dented in.汽车的发动机罩已凹了进去。

18 impunity   

n.(惩罚、损失、伤害等的)免除

参考例句：

• You will not escape with impunity.你不可能逃脱惩罚。
• The impunity what compulsory insurance sets does not include escapement.交强险规定的免责范围不包括逃逸。

19 approbation   

n.称赞；认可

参考例句：

• He tasted the wine of audience approbation.他尝到了像酒般令人陶醉的听众赞许滋味。
• The result has not met universal approbation.该结果尚未获得普遍认同。

20 propounding   

v.提出（问题、计划等）供考虑[讨论]，提议( propound的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• He won the prize by propounding the theory. 他因提出该学说而获奖。 来自互联网

21 comely   

adj.漂亮的，合宜的

参考例句：

• His wife is a comely young woman.他的妻子是一个美丽的少妇。
• A nervous,comely-dressed little girl stepped out.一个紧张不安、衣着漂亮的小姑娘站了出来。

22 maternity   

n.母性，母道，妇产科病房；adj.孕妇的，母性的

参考例句：

• Women workers are entitled to maternity leave with full pay.女工产假期间工资照发。
• Trainee nurses have to work for some weeks in maternity.受训的护士必须在产科病房工作数周。

23 promising   

adj.有希望的，有前途的

参考例句：

• The results of the experiments are very promising.实验的结果充满了希望。
• We're trying to bring along one or two promising young swimmers.我们正设法培养出一两名有前途的年轻游泳选手。

24 spoke   

n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说

参考例句：

• They sourced the spoke nuts from our company.他们的轮辐螺帽是从我们公司获得的。
• The spokes of a wheel are the bars that connect the outer ring to the centre.辐条是轮子上连接外圈与中心的条棒。

25 incorrigibly   

adv.无法矫正地；屡教不改地；无可救药地；不能矫正地

参考例句：

• He was incorrigibly obstinate, no matter who persuaded him. 不论谁劝他，他都顽固不化。 来自互联网
• Medora is incorrigibly romantic. 梅朵拉很富于幻想，这是不可救药的。 来自互联网

26 chattered   

（人）喋喋不休( chatter的过去式 )； 唠叨； （牙齿）打战； （机器）震颤

参考例句：

• They chattered away happily for a while. 他们高兴地闲扯了一会儿。
• We chattered like two teenagers. 我们聊着天，像两个十多岁的孩子。

27 chatter   

vi.／n.喋喋不休；短促尖叫；(牙齿)打战

参考例句：

• Her continuous chatter vexes me.她的喋喋不休使我烦透了。
• I've had enough of their continual chatter.我已厌烦了他们喋喋不休的闲谈。

28 withdrawn   

vt.收回；使退出；vi.撤退，退出

参考例句：

• Our force has been withdrawn from the danger area.我们的军队已从危险地区撤出。
• All foreign troops should be withdrawn to their own countries.一切外国军队都应撤回本国去。

29 continental   

adj.大陆的，大陆性的，欧洲大陆的

参考例句：

• A continental climate is different from an insular one.大陆性气候不同于岛屿气候。
• The most ancient parts of the continental crust are 4000 million years old.大陆地壳最古老的部分有40亿年历史。

30 shreds   

v.撕碎，切碎( shred的第三人称单数 )；用撕毁机撕毁（文件）

参考例句：

• Peel the carrots and cut them into shreds. 将胡罗卜削皮，切成丝。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• I want to take this diary and rip it into shreds. 我真想一赌气扯了这日记。 来自汉英文学 - 中国现代小说

31 faculties   

n.能力( faculty的名词复数 )；全体教职员；技巧；院

参考例句：

• Although he's ninety, his mental faculties remain unimpaired. 他虽年届九旬，但头脑仍然清晰。
• All your faculties have come into play in your work. 在你的工作中，你的全部才能已起到了作用。 来自《简明英汉词典》

32 tranquil   

adj. 安静的, 宁静的, 稳定的, 不变的

参考例句：

• The boy disturbed the tranquil surface of the pond with a stick. 那男孩用棍子打破了平静的池面。
• The tranquil beauty of the village scenery is unique. 这乡村景色的宁静是绝无仅有的。

33 grandiloquent   

adj.夸张的

参考例句：

• He preferred,in his grandiloquent way,to call a spade a spade.他喜欢夸夸其谈地谈出事实的真相来。
• He was a performer who loved making grandiloquent gesture.他是一个喜欢打夸张手势的演员。

34 poetic   

adj.富有诗意的，有诗人气质的，善于抒情的

参考例句：

• His poetic idiom is stamped with expressions describing group feeling and thought.他的诗中的措辞往往带有描写群体感情和思想的印记。
• His poetic novels have gone through three different historical stages.他的诗情小说创作经历了三个不同的历史阶段。

35 confided   

v.吐露（秘密，心事等）( confide的过去式和过去分词 )；（向某人）吐露（隐私、秘密等）

参考例句：

• She confided all her secrets to her best friend. 她向她最要好的朋友倾吐了自己所有的秘密。
• He confided to me that he had spent five years in prison. 他私下向我透露，他蹲过五年监狱。 来自《简明英汉词典》

36 timorously   

adv.胆怯地，羞怯地

参考例句：

• Prissy climbed reluctantly from the wagon with many groans and timorously followed Scarlett up the avenue. 百里茜很不情愿从马车上爬下来，一路嘟囔，跟着思嘉胆怯地向那条林荫道走去。 来自飘（部分）

37 supercilious   

adj.目中无人的，高傲的；adv.高傲地；n.高傲

参考例句：

• The shop assistant was very supercilious towards me when I asked for some help.我要买东西招呼售货员时，那个售货员对我不屑一顾。
• His manner is supercilious and arrogant.他非常傲慢自大。

38 recollect   

v.回忆，想起，记起，忆起，记得

参考例句：

• He tried to recollect things and drown himself in them.他极力回想过去的事情而沉浸于回忆之中。
• She could not recollect being there.她回想不起曾经到过那儿。

39 mincing   

adj.矫饰的；v.切碎；切碎

参考例句：

• She came to the park with mincing,and light footsteps.她轻移莲步来到了花园之中。
• There is no use in mincing matters.掩饰事实是没有用的。

40 glibness   

n.花言巧语；口若悬河

参考例句：

• Mr Samgrass replied with such glibness and at such length, telling me of mislaid luggage. 桑格拉斯先生却油嘴滑舌，事无巨细地告诉我们说行李如何被错放了。 来自辞典例句

41 rebuke   

v.指责，非难，斥责 [反]praise

参考例句：

• He had to put up with a smart rebuke from the teacher.他不得不忍受老师的严厉指责。
• Even one minute's lateness would earn a stern rebuke.哪怕迟到一分钟也将受到严厉的斥责。

42 attire   

v.穿衣，装扮[同]array；n.衣着；盛装

参考例句：

• He had no intention of changing his mode of attire.他无意改变着装方式。
• Her attention was attracted by his peculiar attire.他那奇特的服装引起了她的注意。

43 flaunted   

v.炫耀，夸耀( flaunt的过去式和过去分词 )；有什么能耐就施展出来

参考例句：

• She flaunted the school rules by not wearing the proper uniform. 她不穿规定的校服，以示对校规的藐视。 来自互联网
• Ember burning with reeds flaunted to the blue sky. 芦苇燃烧成灰烬，撒向蔚蓝的苍穹。 来自互联网

44 garb   

n.服装，装束

参考例句：

• He wore the garb of a general.他身着将军的制服。
• Certain political,social,and legal forms reappear in seemingly different garb.一些政治、社会和法律的形式在表面不同的外衣下重复出现。

45 arrogant   

adj.傲慢的，自大的

参考例句：

• You've got to get rid of your arrogant ways.你这骄傲劲儿得好好改改。
• People are waking up that he is arrogant.人们开始认识到他很傲慢。

46 hovered   

鸟( hover的过去式和过去分词 )； 靠近（某事物）； （人）徘徊； 犹豫

参考例句：

• A hawk hovered over the hill. 一只鹰在小山的上空翱翔。
• A hawk hovered in the blue sky. 一只老鹰在蓝色的天空中翱翔。

47 patronage   

n.赞助，支援，援助；光顾，捧场

参考例句：

• Though it was not yet noon,there was considerable patronage.虽然时间未到中午，店中已有许多顾客惠顾。
• I am sorry to say that my patronage ends with this.很抱歉，我的赞助只能到此为止。

48 refreshment   

n.恢复，精神爽快，提神之事物；（复数）refreshments:点心，茶点

参考例句：

• He needs to stop fairly often for refreshment.他须时不时地停下来喘口气。
• A hot bath is a great refreshment after a day's work.在一天工作之后洗个热水澡真是舒畅。

49 anomalous   

adj.反常的；不规则的

参考例句：

• For years this anomalous behaviour has baffled scientists.几年来这种反常行为让科学家们很困惑。
• The mechanism of this anomalous vascular response is unknown.此种不规则的血管反应的机制尚不清楚。

50 desolate   

adj.荒凉的，荒芜的；孤独的，凄凉的；v.使荒芜，使孤寂

参考例句：

• The city was burned into a desolate waste.那座城市被烧成一片废墟。
• We all felt absolutely desolate when she left.她走后，我们都觉得万分孤寂。

51 prospects   

n.希望，前途(恒为复数)

参考例句：

• There is a mood of pessimism in the company about future job prospects. 公司中有一种对工作前景悲观的情绪。
• They are less sanguine about the company's long-term prospects. 他们对公司的远景不那么乐观。

52 interval   

n.间隔，间距；幕间休息，中场休息

参考例句：

• The interval between the two trees measures 40 feet.这两棵树的间隔是40英尺。
• There was a long interval before he anwsered the telephone.隔了好久他才回了电话。

53 retract   

vt.缩回，撤回收回，取消

参考例句：

• The criminals should stop on the precipice, retract from the wrong path and not go any further.犯罪分子应当迷途知返，悬崖勒马，不要在错误的道路上继续走下去。
• I don't want to speak rashly now and later have to retract my statements.我不想现在说些轻率的话，然后又要收回自己说过的话。

54 persuasion   

n.劝说；说服；持有某种信仰的宗派

参考例句：

• He decided to leave only after much persuasion.经过多方劝说，他才决定离开。
• After a lot of persuasion,she agreed to go.经过多次劝说后，她同意去了。

55 sufficiently   

adv.足够地，充分地

参考例句：

• It turned out he had not insured the house sufficiently.原来他没有给房屋投足保险。
• The new policy was sufficiently elastic to accommodate both views.新政策充分灵活地适用两种观点。

56 mighty   

adj.强有力的；巨大的

参考例句：

• A mighty force was about to break loose.一股巨大的力量即将迸发而出。
• The mighty iceberg came into view.巨大的冰山出现在眼前。

57 colossal   

adj.异常的，庞大的

参考例句：

• There has been a colossal waste of public money.一直存在巨大的公款浪费。
• Some of the tall buildings in that city are colossal.那座城市里的一些高层建筑很庞大。

58 knell   

n.丧钟声；v.敲丧钟

参考例句：

• That is the death knell of the British Empire.这是不列颠帝国的丧钟。
• At first he thought it was a death knell.起初，他以为是死亡的丧钟敲响了。