This would have been bad enough in any year, but in times when he bore the burden of his yet profitless milk-round it was only a little short of catastrophe7. Making every allowance for a first year, that milk-round had[Pg 265] disappointed him. He found private custom hard to win, and even the ceasing of French dairy supplies, owing to the Franco-Prussian war, did not bring him the relief he had hoped. One or two small farms on the borders of Rye catered8 in dairy stuff for its inhabitants, and he found them hard to outbid or outwit. Also, owing to the scarcity9 of grass feed, it was a bad milk year, and poor supplies were put down by consumers to the new milkman, and in more than one case custom was withdrawn10.
Reuben faced his adversity with set teeth and a dogged countenance11. He had not been farming thirty odd years to be beaten casually12 by the weather. Scorching13 heat and blighting14 cold, the still blanker doom15 of the trickling16, pouring rain—the wind that seeded his corn, and beat down his hay, and flung his hop-bines together in muddled17 heaps—the pests that Nature breeds by the ten million out of her own putrefyings and misbegettings—all things in life from the lowest maggot to the fiercest storm—he was out to fight them. In challenging Boarzell he had challenged them all.
In time his struggle began to modify his relations with Rose. At first he had told himself that her uselessness was only apparent. Though she herself did no fighting, she gave such rest and refreshment18 to the soldier that he went forth19 strengthened to the war. He had almost begun to attribute to her his daily renewed courage, and had once or twice been moved to show his gratitude20 by acts of expensive indulgence.
Now slowly he began to see that this gratitude was misleading—better receive no comfort from Rose than pay for it too dear. He must make her understand that he could not afford to keep a useless and extravagant21 wife, however charming she might be. Rose must do her share, as Naomi had done, as his mother had done, as his children had done.
Sometimes he would expostulate with her, and when[Pg 266] she met his expostulations with blandishments, he would feel himself yielding, and grow so furious that he would turn upon her in rage and indignation. Rose was not like Naomi; in her own words "she gave as good as she got," and once or twice, for the first time in his life, Reuben found himself in loud and vulgar altercation22 with a female. He had never before had a woman stand up to him, and the experience was humiliating.
He had used to turn from Boarzell to her for rest, and now he found himself turning from her to Boarzell. It was part of the baffling paradox23 that the thing he fought should also be the thing he loved, and the battlefield his refuge. Out on the Moor24, with the south-west wind rolling over him like the waves of some huge earth-scented sea, he drank in the spirit of conflict, he was swept back into the cleanness and singleness of his warfare25. It was then that Boarzell nerved him for its own subduing26, stripped his heart of softness, cleansed27 it of domestic fret28. Rose and her love and sweetness were all very well, but he was out for something greater than Rose—he must keep in mind that she was only a part of things. Why, he himself was only a part of things, and in his cravings and softenings must be conquered and brushed aside even as Rose. In challenging Boarzell he had challenged the secret forces of his own body, all the riot of hope and weakness and desire that go to make a man. The battle was not to be won except over the heaped bodies of the slain29, and on the summit of the heap would lie his own.
点击收听单词发音
1 parched | |
adj.焦干的;极渴的;v.(使)焦干 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
2 sodden | |
adj.浑身湿透的;v.使浸透;使呆头呆脑 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
3 abruptly | |
adv.突然地,出其不意地 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
4 hops | |
跳上[下]( hop的第三人称单数 ); 单足蹦跳; 齐足(或双足)跳行; 摘葎草花 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
5 ragged | |
adj.衣衫褴褛的,粗糙的,刺耳的 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
6 blight | |
n.枯萎病;造成破坏的因素;vt.破坏,摧残 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
7 catastrophe | |
n.大灾难,大祸 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
8 catered | |
提供饮食及服务( cater的过去式和过去分词 ); 满足需要,适合 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
9 scarcity | |
n.缺乏,不足,萧条 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
10 withdrawn | |
vt.收回;使退出;vi.撤退,退出 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
11 countenance | |
n.脸色,面容;面部表情;vt.支持,赞同 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
12 casually | |
adv.漠不关心地,无动于衷地,不负责任地 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
13 scorching | |
adj. 灼热的 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
14 blighting | |
使凋萎( blight的现在分词 ); 使颓丧; 损害; 妨害 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
15 doom | |
n.厄运,劫数;v.注定,命定 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
16 trickling | |
n.油画底色含油太多而成泡沫状突起v.滴( trickle的现在分词 );淌;使)慢慢走;缓慢移动 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
17 muddled | |
adj.混乱的;糊涂的;头脑昏昏然的v.弄乱,弄糟( muddle的过去式);使糊涂;对付,混日子 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
18 refreshment | |
n.恢复,精神爽快,提神之事物;(复数)refreshments:点心,茶点 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
19 forth | |
adv.向前;向外,往外 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
20 gratitude | |
adj.感激,感谢 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
21 extravagant | |
adj.奢侈的;过分的;(言行等)放肆的 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
22 altercation | |
n.争吵,争论 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
23 paradox | |
n.似乎矛盾却正确的说法;自相矛盾的人(物) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
24 moor | |
n.荒野,沼泽;vt.(使)停泊;vi.停泊 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
25 warfare | |
n.战争(状态);斗争;冲突 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
26 subduing | |
征服( subdue的现在分词 ); 克制; 制服; 色变暗 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
27 cleansed | |
弄干净,清洗( cleanse的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
28 fret | |
v.(使)烦恼;(使)焦急;(使)腐蚀,(使)磨损 | |
参考例句: |
|
|
29 slain | |
杀死,宰杀,杀戮( slay的过去分词 ); (slay的过去分词) | |
参考例句: |
|
|
欢迎访问英文小说网 |