But David's death struck home. David and William were the only two children whom he had really loved. They were his hope, his future. Once again he tasted the agonies of bereaved2 fatherhood, with the added tincture of hopelessness. He would never again see David's brown, strong, merry face, hear his voice, build plans for him. For some days the paternal3 feeling was so strong that he craved4 for his boy quite apart from Odiam, just for himself. It had taken eighty years and his son's death to make a father of him.
An added grief was the absence of a funeral. Reuben did not feel this as the relief it would have been to some. He had given handsome and expensive funerals to those not half so dear as this young man who had been hurried into his soldier's grave on the lonely veldt. In course of time William sent him a snapshot of the place, with its little wooden cross. Reuben dictated5 a tremendously long letter through Maude the dairy-woman, in which he said he wanted a marble head-stone put up, and "of Odiam, Sussex," added to the inscription6.
The neighbourhood pitied him in his loss. There was indeed something rather pathetic about this old man of eighty, who had lost nearly all his kith and kin7, yet now tasted bereavement8 for the first time. They noticed that he lost some of the erectness9 which had distinguished10 him, the corners of his mouth drooped11, and his[Pg 418] hair, though persistently12 thick, passed from iron grey to a dusty white.
One day when he was walking through the village he heard a woman say as he passed—"There he goes! I pity un, poor old man!" The insult went into him like a knife. He turned round and gave the woman his fiercest scowl13. Old indeed! Had one ever heard of such a thing! old!—and he could guide the plough and dig furrows14 in the marl, and stack, and reap with any of 'em. Old!—why, he was only—
—He was eighty. He suddenly realised that, after all, he was old. He did not carry himself as erectly15 as he had used; there were pains and stiffness in his limbs and rheumatic swellings in his joints16. His hair was white, and his once lusty arms were now all shrivelled skin and sinew, with the ossified17 veins18 standing19 out hard and grey. He was what Harry20 was always calling himself—"only a poor old man"—a poor old man who had lost his son, whom cottage women pitied from their doorsteps—and be hemmed21 to them, the sluts!
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1 inadequacy | |
n.无法胜任,信心不足 | |
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2 bereaved | |
adj.刚刚丧失亲人的v.使失去(希望、生命等)( bereave的过去式和过去分词);(尤指死亡)使丧失(亲人、朋友等);使孤寂;抢走(财物) | |
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3 paternal | |
adj.父亲的,像父亲的,父系的,父方的 | |
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4 craved | |
渴望,热望( crave的过去式 ); 恳求,请求 | |
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5 dictated | |
v.大声讲或读( dictate的过去式和过去分词 );口授;支配;摆布 | |
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6 inscription | |
n.(尤指石块上的)刻印文字,铭文,碑文 | |
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7 kin | |
n.家族,亲属,血缘关系;adj.亲属关系的,同类的 | |
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8 bereavement | |
n.亲人丧亡,丧失亲人,丧亲之痛 | |
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9 erectness | |
n.直立 | |
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10 distinguished | |
adj.卓越的,杰出的,著名的 | |
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11 drooped | |
弯曲或下垂,发蔫( droop的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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12 persistently | |
ad.坚持地;固执地 | |
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13 scowl | |
vi.(at)生气地皱眉,沉下脸,怒视;n.怒容 | |
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14 furrows | |
n.犁沟( furrow的名词复数 );(脸上的)皱纹v.犁田,开沟( furrow的第三人称单数 ) | |
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15 erectly | |
adv.直立地,垂直地 | |
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16 joints | |
接头( joint的名词复数 ); 关节; 公共场所(尤指价格低廉的饮食和娱乐场所) (非正式); 一块烤肉 (英式英语) | |
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17 ossified | |
adj.已骨化[硬化]的v.骨化,硬化,使僵化( ossify的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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18 veins | |
n.纹理;矿脉( vein的名词复数 );静脉;叶脉;纹理 | |
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19 standing | |
n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的 | |
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20 harry | |
vt.掠夺,蹂躏,使苦恼 | |
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21 hemmed | |
缝…的褶边( hem的过去式和过去分词 ); 包围 | |
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