Chapter 32

And her, white-muslined, waiting there

In the porch with high-expectant heart,

While still the thin mechanic air

    Went on inside.

—Hardy, “The Musical Box”

 

 

Ernestina had, that previous night, not been able to sleep. She knew perfectly¹ well which windows in the White Lion were Charles’s, and she did not fail to note that his light was still on long after her aunt’s snores began to creep through the silent house. She felt hurt and she felt guilty in about equal parts—that is, to begin with. But when she had stolen from her bed for quite the sixteenth time to see if the light still burned, and it did, her guilt² began to increase. Charles was very evidently, and justly, displeased³ with her.

Now when, after Charles’s departure, Ernestina had said to herself—and subsequently to Aunt Tranter—that she really didn’t care a fig⁴ for Winsyatt, you may think that sour grapes would have been a more appropriate horticultural metaphor⁵. She had certainly wooed herself into graciously accepting the role of chatelaine when Charles left for his uncle’s, had even begun drawing up lists of “Items to be attended to” ... but the sudden death of that dream had come as a certain relief. Women who run great houses need a touch of the general about them; and Ernestina had no military aspirations⁶ what-ever. She liked every luxury, and to be waited on, hand if not foot; but she had a very sound bourgeois⁷ sense of proportion. Thirty rooms when fifteen were sufficient was to her a folly⁸. Perhaps she got this comparative thrift⁹ from her father, who secretly believed that “aristocrat” was a synonym¹⁰ of “vain ostentation,” though this did not stop him basing a not inconsiderable part of his business on that fault, or running a London house many a nobleman would have been glad of— or pouncing¹¹ on the first chance of a title that offered for his dearly beloved daughter. To give him his due, he might have turned down a viscount as excessive; a baronetcy was so eminently¹² proper.

I am not doing well by Ernestina, who was after all a victim of circumstances; of an illiberal¹³ environment. It is, of course, its essentially¹⁴ schizophrenic outlook on society that makes the middle class such a peculiar¹⁵ mixture of yeast¹⁶ and dough¹⁷. We tend nowadays to forget that it has always been the great revolutionary class; we see much more the doughy¹⁸ aspect, the bourgeoisie as the heartland of reaction, the universal insult, forever selfish and conforming. Now this Janus-like quality derives¹⁹ from the class’s one saving virtue²⁰, which is this: that alone of the three great castes of society it sincerely and habitually²¹ despises itself. Ernestina was certain-ly no exception here. It was not only Charles who heard an unwelcome acidity²² in her voice; she heard it herself. But her tragedy (and one that remains²³ ubiquitous) was that she misapplied this precious gift of self-contempt and so made herself a victim of her class’s perennial²⁵ lack of faith in itself. Instead of seeing its failings as a reason to reject the entire class system, she saw them as a reason to seek a higher. She cannot be blamed, of course; she had been hopelessly well trained to view society as so many rungs on a ladder; thus reducing her own to a mere²⁶ step to something supposedly better.

Thus (“I am shameful²⁷, I have behaved like a draper’s daughter”) it was, in the small hours, that Ernestina gave up the attempt to sleep, rose and pulled on her peignoir, and then unlocked her diary. Perhaps Charles would see that her window was also still penitentially bright in the heavy darkness that followed the thunderstorm. Meanwhile, she set herself to composition.

 

I cannot sleep. Dearest C. is displeased with me—I was so very upset at the dreadful news from Winsyatt. I wished to cry, I was so very vexed²⁸, but I foolishly said many angry, spiteful things— which I ask God to forgive me, remembering I said them out of love for dearest C. and not wickedness. I did weep most terribly when he went away. Let this be a lesson to me to take the beauti-ful words of the Marriage Service to my conscience, to honor and obey my dearest Charles even when my feelings would drive me to contradict him. Let me earnestly and humbly²⁹ learn to bend my horrid³⁰, spiteful willfulness to his much greater wisdom, let me cherish his judgment³¹ and chain myself to his heart, for “The sweet of true Repentance³² is the gate to Holy Bliss³³.”

 

You may have noted³⁴ a certain lack of Ernestina’s normal dryness in this touching³⁵ paragraph; but Charles was not alone in having several voices. And just as she hoped he might see the late light in her room, so did she envisage³⁶ a day when he might coax³⁷ her into sharing this intimate record of her prenuptial soul. She wrote partly for his eyes—as, like every other Victorian woman, she wrote partly for His eyes. She went relieved to bed, so totally and suitably her betrothed’s chastened bride in spirit that she leaves me no alternative but to conclude that she must, in the end, win Charles back from his infidelity.

And she was still fast asleep when a small drama took place four floors below her. Sam had not got up quite as early as his master that morning. When he went into the hotel kitchen for his tea and toasted cheese—one thing few Victorian servants did was eat less than their masters, what-ever their lack of gastronomic³⁸ propriety—the boots greeted him with the news that his master had gone out; and that Sam was to pack and strap³⁹ and be ready to leave at noon. Sam hid his shock. Packing and strapping⁴⁰ was but half an hour’s work. He had more pressing business.

He went immediately to Aunt Tranter’s house. What he said we need not inquire, except that it must have been penetrated⁴¹ with tragedy, since when Aunt Tranter (who kept uncivilized rural hours) came down to the kitchen only a minute later, she found Mary slumped⁴² in a collapse⁴³ of tears at the kitchen table. The deaf cook’s sarcastic⁴⁴ uplift of her chin showed there was little sympathy there. Mary was inter-rogated; and Aunt Tranter soon elicited⁴⁵, in her briskly gentle way, the source of misery⁴⁶; and applied²⁴ a much kinder reme-dy than Charles had. The maid might be off till Ernestina had to be attended to; since Miss Ernestina’s heavy brocade curtains customarily remained drawn⁴⁷ until ten, that was near-ly three hours’ grace. Aunt Tranter was rewarded by the most grateful smile the world saw that day. Five minutes later Sam was to be seen sprawling⁴⁸ in the middle of Broad Street. One should not run full tilt⁴⁹ across cobbles, even to a Mary.

1 perfectly   

adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地

参考例句：

• The witnesses were each perfectly certain of what they said.证人们个个对自己所说的话十分肯定。
• Everything that we're doing is all perfectly above board.我们做的每件事情都是光明正大的。

2 guilt   

n.犯罪；内疚；过失，罪责

参考例句：

• She tried to cover up her guilt by lying.她企图用谎言掩饰自己的罪行。
• Don't lay a guilt trip on your child about schoolwork.别因为功课责备孩子而使他觉得很内疚。

3 displeased   

a.不快的

参考例句：

• The old man was displeased and darted an angry look at me. 老人不高兴了，瞪了我一眼。
• He was displeased about the whole affair. 他对整个事情感到很不高兴。

4 fig   

n.无花果(树)

参考例句：

• The doctor finished the fig he had been eating and selected another.这位医生吃完了嘴里的无花果，又挑了一个。
• You can't find a person who doesn't know fig in the United States.你找不到任何一个在美国的人不知道无花果的。

5 metaphor   

n.隐喻，暗喻

参考例句：

• Using metaphor,we say that computers have senses and a memory.打个比方，我们可以说计算机有感觉和记忆力。
• In poetry the rose is often a metaphor for love.玫瑰在诗中通常作为爱的象征。

6 aspirations   

强烈的愿望( aspiration的名词复数 )； 志向； 发送气音； 发 h 音

参考例句：

• I didn't realize you had political aspirations. 我没有意识到你有政治上的抱负。
• The new treaty embodies the aspirations of most nonaligned countries. 新条约体现了大多数不结盟国家的愿望。

7 bourgeois   

adj./n.追求物质享受的(人)；中产阶级分子

参考例句：

• He's accusing them of having a bourgeois and limited vision.他指责他们像中产阶级一样目光狭隘。
• The French Revolution was inspired by the bourgeois.法国革命受到中产阶级的鼓励。

8 folly   

n.愚笨，愚蠢，蠢事，蠢行，傻话

参考例句：

• Learn wisdom by the folly of others.从别人的愚蠢行动中学到智慧。
• Events proved the folly of such calculations.事情的进展证明了这种估计是愚蠢的。

9 thrift   

adj.节约，节俭；n.节俭，节约

参考例句：

• He has the virtues of thrift and hard work.他具备节俭和勤奋的美德。
• His thrift and industry speak well for his future.他的节俭和勤勉预示着他美好的未来。

10 synonym   

n.同义词，换喻词

参考例句：

• Zhuge Liang is a synonym for wisdom in folklore.诸葛亮在民间传说中成了智慧的代名词。
• The term 'industrial democracy' is often used as a synonym for worker participation. “工业民主”这个词常被用作“工人参与”的同义词。

11 pouncing   

v.突然袭击( pounce的现在分词 )；猛扑；一眼看出；抓住机会（进行抨击）

参考例句：

• Detective Sun grinned and, pouncing on the gourd, smashed it against the wall. 孙侦探笑了，一把将瓦罐接过来，往墙上一碰。 来自汉英文学 - 骆驼祥子
• We saw the tiger pouncing on the goat. 我们看见老虎向那只山羊扑过去。 来自互联网

12 eminently   

adv.突出地；显著地；不寻常地

参考例句：

• She seems eminently suitable for the job. 她看来非常适合这个工作。
• It was an eminently respectable boarding school. 这是所非常好的寄宿学校。 来自《简明英汉词典》

13 illiberal   

adj.气量狭小的，吝啬的

参考例句：

• His views are markedly illiberal.他的观点非常狭隘。
• Don't be illiberal in your words to show your love.不要吝啬自己的语言表达你的情感。

14 essentially   

adv.本质上，实质上，基本上

参考例句：

• Really great men are essentially modest.真正的伟人大都很谦虚。
• She is an essentially selfish person.她本质上是个自私自利的人。

15 peculiar   

adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的

参考例句：

• He walks in a peculiar fashion.他走路的样子很奇特。
• He looked at me with a very peculiar expression.他用一种很奇怪的表情看着我。

16 yeast   

n.酵母；酵母片；泡沫；v.发酵；起泡沫

参考例句：

• Yeast can be used in making beer and bread.酵母可用于酿啤酒和发面包。
• The yeast began to work.酵母开始发酵。

17 dough   

n.生面团；钱，现款

参考例句：

• She formed the dough into squares.她把生面团捏成四方块。
• The baker is kneading dough.那位面包师在揉面。

18 doughy   

adj.面团的，苍白的，半熟的；软弱无力

参考例句：

• The cake fell; it's a doughy mess. 蛋糕掉在地上，粘糊糊的一团。 来自互联网
• Soon the mixture was doughy. 很快，混合物成了面团状。 来自互联网

19 derives   

v.得到( derive的第三人称单数 )；（从…中）得到获得；源于；（从…中）提取

参考例句：

• English derives in the main from the common Germanic stock. 英语主要源于日耳曼语系。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• He derives his income from freelance work. 他以自由职业获取收入。 来自《简明英汉词典》

20 virtue   

n.德行，美德；贞操；优点；功效，效力

参考例句：

• He was considered to be a paragon of virtue.他被认为是品德尽善尽美的典范。
• You need to decorate your mind with virtue.你应该用德行美化心灵。

21 habitually   

ad.习惯地，通常地

参考例句：

• The pain of the disease caused him habitually to furrow his brow. 病痛使他习惯性地紧皱眉头。
• Habitually obedient to John, I came up to his chair. 我已经习惯于服从约翰，我来到他的椅子跟前。

22 acidity   

n.酸度，酸性

参考例句：

• This plant prefers alkaline soil,though it will readily tolerate some acidity.这种植物在酸性土壤中也能生存，但硷性土壤更加适宜。
• Gastric acidity would not prevent the organism from passing into the gut.胃的酸度不能防止细菌进入肠道。

23 remains   

n.剩余物，残留物；遗体，遗迹

参考例句：

• He ate the remains of food hungrily.他狼吞虎咽地吃剩余的食物。
• The remains of the meal were fed to the dog.残羹剩饭喂狗了。

24 applied   

adj.应用的；v.应用，适用

参考例句：

• She plans to take a course in applied linguistics.她打算学习应用语言学课程。
• This cream is best applied to the face at night.这种乳霜最好晚上擦脸用。

25 perennial   

adj.终年的；长久的

参考例句：

• I wonder at her perennial youthfulness.我对她青春常驻感到惊讶。
• There's a perennial shortage of teachers with science qualifications.有理科教学资格的老师一直都很短缺。

26 mere   

adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过

参考例句：

• That is a mere repetition of what you said before.那不过是重复了你以前讲的话。
• It's a mere waste of time waiting any longer.再等下去纯粹是浪费时间。

27 shameful   

adj.可耻的，不道德的

参考例句：

• It is very shameful of him to show off.他向人炫耀自己，真不害臊。
• We must expose this shameful activity to the newspapers.我们一定要向报社揭露这一无耻行径。

28 vexed   

adj.争论不休的；（指问题等）棘手的；争论不休的问题；烦恼的v.使烦恼( vex的过去式和过去分词 )；使苦恼；使生气；详细讨论

参考例句：

• The conference spent days discussing the vexed question of border controls. 会议花了几天的时间讨论边境关卡这个难题。
• He was vexed at his failure. 他因失败而懊恼。 来自《现代汉英综合大词典》

29 humbly   

adv. 恭顺地，谦卑地

参考例句：

• We humbly beg Your Majesty to show mercy. 我们恳请陛下发发慈悲。
• "You must be right, Sir,'said John humbly. “你一定是对的，先生，”约翰恭顺地说道。

30 horrid   

adj.可怕的；令人惊恐的；恐怖的；极讨厌的

参考例句：

• I'm not going to the horrid dinner party.我不打算去参加这次讨厌的宴会。
• The medicine is horrid and she couldn't get it down.这种药很难吃，她咽不下去。

31 judgment   

n.审判；判断力，识别力，看法，意见

参考例句：

• The chairman flatters himself on his judgment of people.主席自认为他审视人比别人高明。
• He's a man of excellent judgment.他眼力过人。

32 repentance   

n.懊悔

参考例句：

• He shows no repentance for what he has done.他对他的所作所为一点也不懊悔。
• Christ is inviting sinners to repentance.基督正在敦请有罪的人悔悟。

33 bliss   

n.狂喜，福佑，天赐的福

参考例句：

• It's sheer bliss to be able to spend the day in bed.整天都可以躺在床上真是幸福。
• He's in bliss that he's won the Nobel Prize.他非常高兴，因为获得了诺贝尔奖金。

34 noted   

adj.著名的，知名的

参考例句：

• The local hotel is noted for its good table.当地的那家酒店以餐食精美而著称。
• Jim is noted for arriving late for work.吉姆上班迟到出了名。

35 touching   

adj.动人的，使人感伤的

参考例句：

• It was a touching sight.这是一幅动人的景象。
• His letter was touching.他的信很感人。

36 envisage   

v.想象，设想，展望，正视

参考例句：

• Nobody can envisage the consequences of total nuclear war.没有人能够想像全面核战争的后果。
• When do you envisage being able to pay me back?你看你什么时候能还我钱？

37 coax   

v.哄诱，劝诱，用诱哄得到，诱取

参考例句：

• I had to coax the information out of him.我得用好话套出他掌握的情况。
• He tried to coax the secret from me.他试图哄骗我说出秘方。

38 gastronomic   

adj.美食（烹饪）法的，烹任学的

参考例句：

• The gastronomic restaurant is a feature of the hotel. 美食餐厅是这家饭店的一个特色。 来自互联网
• The restaurant offers a special gastronomic menu. 这家餐馆备有一份特别的美食菜单。 来自互联网

39 strap   

n.皮带，带子；v.用带扣住，束牢；用绷带包扎

参考例句：

• She held onto a strap to steady herself.她抓住拉手吊带以便站稳。
• The nurse will strap up your wound.护士会绑扎你的伤口。

40 strapping   

adj. 魁伟的, 身材高大健壮的 n. 皮绳或皮带的材料, 裹伤胶带, 皮鞭 动词strap的现在分词形式

参考例句：

• He's a strapping lad—already bigger than his father. 他是一个魁梧的小伙子——已经比他父亲高了。
• He was a tall strapping boy. 他是一个高大健壮的小伙子。

41 penetrated   

adj. 击穿的，鞭辟入里的 动词penetrate的过去式和过去分词形式

参考例句：

• The knife had penetrated his chest. 刀子刺入了他的胸膛。
• They penetrated into territory where no man had ever gone before. 他们已进入先前没人去过的地区。

42 slumped   

大幅度下降，暴跌( slump的过去式和过去分词 )； 沉重或突然地落下[倒下]

参考例句：

• Sales have slumped this year. 今年销售量锐减。
• The driver was slumped exhausted over the wheel. 司机伏在方向盘上，疲惫得睡着了。

43 collapse   

vi.累倒；昏倒；倒塌；塌陷

参考例句：

• The country's economy is on the verge of collapse.国家的经济已到了崩溃的边缘。
• The engineer made a complete diagnosis of the bridge's collapse.工程师对桥的倒塌做了一次彻底的调查分析。

44 sarcastic   

adj.讥讽的，讽刺的，嘲弄的

参考例句：

• I squashed him with a sarcastic remark.我说了一句讽刺的话把他给镇住了。
• She poked fun at people's shortcomings with sarcastic remarks.她冷嘲热讽地拿别人的缺点开玩笑。

45 elicited   

引出，探出( elicit的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• Threats to reinstate the tax elicited jeer from the Opposition. 恢复此项征税的威胁引起了反对党的嘲笑。
• The comedian's joke elicited applause and laughter from the audience. 那位滑稽演员的笑话博得观众的掌声和笑声。

46 misery   

n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦

参考例句：

• Business depression usually causes misery among the working class.商业不景气常使工薪阶层受苦。
• He has rescued me from the mire of misery.他把我从苦海里救了出来。

47 drawn   

v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的

参考例句：

• All the characters in the story are drawn from life.故事中的所有人物都取材于生活。
• Her gaze was drawn irresistibly to the scene outside.她的目光禁不住被外面的风景所吸引。

48 sprawling   

adj.蔓生的，不规则地伸展的v.伸开四肢坐[躺]( sprawl的现在分词 )；蔓延；杂乱无序地拓展；四肢伸展坐着（或躺着）

参考例句：

• He was sprawling in an armchair in front of the TV. 他伸开手脚坐在电视机前的一张扶手椅上。
• a modern sprawling town 一座杂乱无序拓展的现代城镇

49 tilt   

v.(使)倾侧；(使)倾斜；n.倾侧；倾斜

参考例句：

• She wore her hat at a tilt over her left eye.她歪戴着帽子遮住左眼。
• The table is at a slight tilt.这张桌子没放平，有点儿歪.