I HAD no sooner disclosed to my father my musings with Fame, and the aspirations1 she had excited in me, than he went right into a passion, and set me down as extravagant2 and mad. He had entertained hopes of making me a schoolmaster, perhaps an inspector3 of fish, in which office excellent opportunities for increasing one's fortunes were offered; but I had been rendered quite useless to the parish ever since the New York politicians had taken me into their favor. Anybody, he said, might go out upon and know the world, but few had the courage and daring to grapple with its difficulties. And then, the world was so wicked that men of reflection instinctively4 shrank from it. Notwithstanding my wild, visionary plans, he yet had hopes of me. But if I sought distinction in the political world, it would be well not to forget that it had at this day become a dangerous quicksand, over which a series of violent storms continually heaved. And these storms, by some mysterious process or other, were incessantly5 casting up on the shore of political popularity and making heroes of men whose virtues6 were not weighty enough to keep them at the bottom. "Be an humble8 citizen, my son," said he: "learn to value a quiet life. You are not given to loud and boisterous9 talking, to lying, or to slandering10; which things, at this day, are essential to political success. Worthy11 and well disposed persons are too much afraid of being drowned in the violence of the storm politicians with shallow brains and empty pockets create, by their anxiety to take the affairs of the nation into their own keeping. Remember, too, that if you fail in the object of your ambition (and you are not vagabond enough to succeed), the remotest desert will not hide you from the evil designs of your enemies. You may seek some crystal stream; you may let your tears flow with its waters; but such will not lighten your disappointment, for the persecuted12 heart is no peace-offering to the political victor. Politically vanquished13; and you are like an unhappy lover who seeks him a rural deity15 and sings his complaints to the winds. Your eye will become jealous at the fortunes of others, but your sighs over the cruelty of what you are pleased to call human imperfections will not bring back your own. Stay quietly at home, my son, and if you cannot be a schoolmaster, chance may one day turn you up President of these United States. Let your insanity16 for writing books not beguile17 you into crime; and above all, I would enjoin18 you, my son, never to write the 'Life and Character' of an in-going President, for then, to follow the fashion of the day, and make for him a life that would apply with equal truth to King Mancho, or any one of his sable19 subjects, will be necessary that you write him down the hero of adventures he never dreamed of, and leave out the score of delinquincies his real life is blemished20 with. If you do this, wise men will set you down a scribbler for charity's sake."
Thus spoke21 my venerable father. But I remembered that he had several times before said that if I would so square my morals as to become in favor with the matronly portion of the parish he would even try and make a parson of me, which was, in his opinion, a promotion22 still higher than schoolmaster. Having got a parish, and chosen the richest damsel of the flock for my wife, there was nothing to hinder me from snapping my fingers at the world and its persecutions.
My father, I would here observe, in justice to his memory, was much given to the study of religion, and would not unfrequently invite to his house the parson of a neighboring village, that he might debate with him on matters appertaining to the creed23, which he had been thirty years narrowing down to the finest point. And yet he always kept a vigilant24 eye to his worldly affairs, nor ever let a man get the better of him in a bargain. Indeed it was said of him that though he had not been to sea for many a day he so linked himself to the fortunes of his neighbors as to secure a large share of the bounty25 so generously paid by our government. That there was nothing in this inconsistent with his love of true religion my father was assured by the parson, who held that worldly possessions in no wise blunted the appetite for redemption; and that even bill-discounting quakers, with their bags of gold on their backs, would not find the gates of heaven shut to them. And as the parson was a man of great learning, though small of figure, and very curatical in his features and dress, his opinions were in high favor with the villagers, among whom he had given it out that he was a graduate of Yale and Harvard, both of which celebrated26 institutions had conferred high honors upon him. This high throwing of the parson's lasso getting abroad atoned27 for innumerable antiquated28 and very dull sermons, for the delivery of which he would excuse himself to his private friends by saying that his salary was but four hundred dollars a year, one third of which he took in No. 2 mackerel no one would buy of him. He was excessively fussy29; and if he advocated temperance to-day, he would to-morrow take a sly smash, never forgetting to add that it was recommended by his physician, who was likewise a man of great learning. Under the influence of this medicine, it was said, by malicious30 people, which no parish is with--out, that if the occasion demanded a serious sermon he was sure to preach one that would send all the young folks of his congregation into a titter. If the occasion was such as to tolerate a little humor, he was sure to send them all into a melancholy31 mood with the gravity of his remarks. In fine, he was sure to be on the opposite side of everything natural. The only question he was not quite sure it would do to get upon, was the slavery question. And for this he always excused himself by saying that there were many others in the same condition. It would not do to be in the desert, hence he inclined to the policy of our fashionable clergy32, who are extremely cautious not to steer33 too close to questions not popular enough to be profitably espoused34. If Parson Stebbins (for such was his name) let drop a few words in favor of freedom to-day, Obadiah Morgan, the most influential35 member of his church, would to-morrow politely withdraw. A word or two complimentary36 of the South and her peculiar37 institutions was equally sure to find him taken to task by the philanthropic females of his parish. In truth, he could approach neither side of the question without finding a fire in his rear. And as his empty pocket would not allow him to rise to independence, he resolved to preach to that portion of his church which was content to let the slavery question take care of itself.
The parson joined my father in his endeavors to shake the resolution I had taken, and said many things concerning the snares38 set by the wicked world, and how easy it was for an ardent39 youth like myself to fall into them, that grievously annoyed my mother; for, as I have said before, she had great faith in my virtue7, and so doted on me that she had a ready excuse for all my follies40. Indeed, she would often smile at the combined alarm of my father and the parson, saying she held it infinitely41 better that a youth like myself go out upon the world in search of distinction, for therein lay the virtue of his example. Children were born to the world; if they had daring enough to go out upon it and battle with it, the parson's advice to stay at home was unnecessary. You could not make human things divine; and, to expect miracles from saints now-a-days, or truth from critics, or liberality from parsons, was like looking for reason in our "current literature."
When my father found that I was, in spite of the admonitions of the parson, resolved on setting out, and that he was confronted by the strong opposition42 of my mother, he gave up in despair, telling me whatever befell me, not to look to him for succor43. My mother, on the other hand, gave herself up to my preparation for the journey with so much ardor44, that she for several days almost wholly neglected the regulation of her domestic affairs. My precious new suit of black, in which I had adorned45 myself on Sundays, and, not a little vain of my appearance, shone out at church, was got out and brushed, and then nicely packed away in my valise, which likewise contained an ample supply of unmentionables, and homemade shirts, and stockings, and other articles appertaining to the wardrobe of an adventurous46 young man. My mother also exercised a wise discretion47 in the selection of such books as she thought would afford me "maxims48 of guidance," as she called it, through the world. A pocket Bible, and a small volume of the "Select Edition of Franklin's Maxims," a book in high favor with the good people of the Cape49, were got of a bookseller in Barnstable, a queer wag, who had got rich by vending50 a strange quality of literature and taking fish in exchange. In addition to these good books provided by my mother, I was careful not to forget my "Polite Speech Maker51," a book which I confess to have studied much. In truth, like many distinguished52 members of Congress, I am indebted to it for my great political popularity. Resolved as I am that this history shall never swerve53 from the truth, I would sincerely recommend a study of the "Polite Speech Maker" to all juvenile54 politicians, dealers55 in liquor, editors of three-cent newspapers, and learned litterateurs, whose names, according to sundry56 malicious writers, it is come the fashion of the day to reflect in one mirror.
In the "Polite Speech Maker" will be found such sentences as "the tranquilized glory of our glorious country," and "the undying beauties, that starry57 emblem58, our flag, awakens59 in our heart of hearts;" and sundry others, equally abstruse60, but no less essential to the objects of primary meetings. The author of this invaluable61 work is my learned friend and very erudite scholar, Dr. Easley. And as some readers hold the study of an author of much more importance than his book, I may be excused for saying here that no one can take up one and forget the other, since literature, as is there set forth62, was never before either blessed or encumbered63 with so great a doctor.
My library and outfit64 being complete, my mother, having provided me with a yellow waistcoat and white plush hat out of her private purse, gave an evening party in honor of my departure. Parson Stebbins, the doctor of a neighboring village, (not Easley, for he had set up his fortunes in New York,) and sundry bright-eyed damsels of my acquaintance, were invited, and came accompanied by their sturdy parents. The last jar of jam and applesauce was stormed, the two fattest pullets in the yard brought to the block, choice mince65 and pumpkin66 pies were propounded67, three dollars were expended68 upon a citron cake such as Cape Cod69 had never seen before, and no less than a dozen bottles of Captain Zeke Brewster's double refined cider was got of Major Cook, the grocer. Stronger beverages70 were held in questionable71 respect by the Cape folks. My mother did, indeed, busy herself for nearly two days in the preparation of this supper, declaring at the same time that she would not be outdone by any housewife this side of Barnstable at least. Nor did she heed72 my father, who continued the while muttering his misgivings73.
The stars shone out bright on the night of the party, which passed off to the delight of every one present. The fowls74, and the pies, and the jam and apple-sauce, and a dish of tea the parson declared could not be excelled, were all discussed with great cheerfulness. My father, as was his custom, drew his chair aside after supper, and engaged two of his guests in religious conversation, while the doctor and the parson got into a corner, and soon became deeply absorbed in a question of law, which they debated over the cider.
No sooner had my mother set her table to rights than she, with an air of motherly watchfulness75, drew her chair beside the damsels, with whom I was exchanging the gossip of the Cape, and entered cheerfully into our conversation.
More than one of the bright eyed and ruddy cheeked damsels gave out hints that led me to believe they would have accompanied me on my journey and shared the fortunes of my career. Nor did their hints disturb my mother, whose mind was too pure to conceive their attentions aught else than blessings76. And thus, with an abundance of good cheer, and the interchange of those civilities so common to villagers, and the singing of an orthodox hymn77 or two, in which my father joined, while the doctor and the parson continued their discussion over the cider, passed one of those rustic78 evening parties so characteristic of Cape Cod.
Half-past nine o'clock arrived, and it being an hour of bedtime religiously kept by the villagers, the bright eyed damsels and their chaperons, each in turn, shook me warmly by the hand, congratulated my mother on having a son so daring, lisped words of encouragement in my ear, and took an affectionate leave. Among them there was one Altona Marabel, the daughter of a worthy fisherman. This damsel had a face of exquisite79 beauty; and her great lustrous80 eyes and blushing cheeks had caused me many a sigh. And now I saw that her heart beat in unison81 with mine, for the words good-by hung reluctant upon her lips. Nay82, more, she would have sealed the love she bore me with a tear, for as she shook my hand it came like a pearl in her eye, and she wiped it away lest it write the tale of her heart upon the crimson83 of her cheek.
Neither the doctor nor the parson were disturbed at the departure of the rest of the company; for they continued to praise the quality of the cider and debate the question of law until my father went into a deep sleep, from which he was disturbed by the parson, who, in response to an invitation from the doctor, commenced singing a song for the entertainment of my mother. Such joviality84 was uncommon85 with the parson, and so surprised and astonished my father, that he intimated to the doctor that it would not be amiss to get him home. Being something of a wag, the doctor intended to vanquish14 the parson with the cider, and then perform certain mischievous86 tricks with his features. But this my father, who was not given to sporting with the weaknesses of others, prevented, by ordering my mother to lock up the six remaining bottles. "We might debate the question until daylight, but I could not convince you," spake the parson, rising from his chair on finding the bottles empty, and rather fussily87 adjusting his spectacles, "it is not expected that law is a part of your profession."
The doctor being a well bred and courteous88 man, bowed and held his peace. Indeed, he saw that the parson's intellect was somewhat deranged89; hence he held it more becoming a Christian90 to tender his services in conducting him to his home, which was some two miles off. The parson now took me by the hand, and having looked me in the eye steadily91 for nearly a minute, addressed me as follows: "You, young man, I am afraid, have got a dangerous turn of mind. Many is the young man that has been hurried to destruction by a too daring and adventurous spirit. But if your resolution to go out upon the world in search of fame is not to be shaken by anything I say, then I would enjoin you always to so fence up your character that the devil and slander-loving editors cannot pick holes in it. Pray much. Let no one tempt92 you with mild drinks, for such only lead to the taking of stronger ones. Go regularly to church, but let not your eyes fall upon the faces of pretty women so that your ears be sealed to the sermon. Never make love to another man's wife. Remember this when you are a great man, for with them it is become a fashion. Let ruffians go their own way. Let gentlemen be your companions, and never fail to show them that you can at least be their equal in courteous demeanor93. Always pay your washerwoman; be not ashamed to acknowledge your father, and remember that the fonder you speak of your mother, the more you will be beloved by strangers. Avoid politicians, who are come to be great vagabonds, who drink bad liquor and give their thoughts to base designs against the nation's gold. If you become great and valorous, historians will no doubt defame you, and lay crimes of which you were innocent at your door, as is common with them. But you must bear what they say of you with Christian fortitude94, remembering, always, that it is a delight with them to tear greatness from its high throne." The parson looked wisely in my face as he said this, and shook his head warningly. "Most of all," he continued, "never permit yourself to fall into the hands of treasury95 swindlers, money changers, and malicious editors, who will set you up as the only fit person to be President of these United States, though you have not a single qualification necessary to the office. For they, being tricky96 men, will be sure to let you down with the same facility they took you up; and when your ancestors, down to the third and fourth generations are dug up, (as it has become necessary to do,) and their character, together with your own, made blacker than the ink they seek to damage one another's character with, they will be the first to declare they were mistaken in you-that you were not the man they took you for."
The parson said many other things of a like character, out which I did not think worth writing down in my memory. He then shook hands with my mother and father, expressed his surprise at the lateness of the hour to the doctor, and took his leave, meeting with a strange mishap97 on his way home, which will be related in the next chapter.
1 aspirations | |
强烈的愿望( aspiration的名词复数 ); 志向; 发送气音; 发 h 音 | |
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2 extravagant | |
adj.奢侈的;过分的;(言行等)放肆的 | |
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3 inspector | |
n.检查员,监察员,视察员 | |
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4 instinctively | |
adv.本能地 | |
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5 incessantly | |
ad.不停地 | |
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6 virtues | |
美德( virtue的名词复数 ); 德行; 优点; 长处 | |
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7 virtue | |
n.德行,美德;贞操;优点;功效,效力 | |
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8 humble | |
adj.谦卑的,恭顺的;地位低下的;v.降低,贬低 | |
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9 boisterous | |
adj.喧闹的,欢闹的 | |
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10 slandering | |
[法]口头诽谤行为 | |
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11 worthy | |
adj.(of)值得的,配得上的;有价值的 | |
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12 persecuted | |
(尤指宗教或政治信仰的)迫害(~sb. for sth.)( persecute的过去式和过去分词 ); 烦扰,困扰或骚扰某人 | |
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13 vanquished | |
v.征服( vanquish的过去式和过去分词 );战胜;克服;抑制 | |
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14 vanquish | |
v.征服,战胜;克服;抑制 | |
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15 deity | |
n.神,神性;被奉若神明的人(或物) | |
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16 insanity | |
n.疯狂,精神错乱;极端的愚蠢,荒唐 | |
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17 beguile | |
vt.欺骗,消遣 | |
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18 enjoin | |
v.命令;吩咐;禁止 | |
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19 sable | |
n.黑貂;adj.黑色的 | |
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20 blemished | |
v.有损…的完美,玷污( blemish的过去式 ) | |
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21 spoke | |
n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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22 promotion | |
n.提升,晋级;促销,宣传 | |
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23 creed | |
n.信条;信念,纲领 | |
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24 vigilant | |
adj.警觉的,警戒的,警惕的 | |
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25 bounty | |
n.慷慨的赠予物,奖金;慷慨,大方;施与 | |
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26 celebrated | |
adj.有名的,声誉卓著的 | |
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27 atoned | |
v.补偿,赎(罪)( atone的过去式和过去分词 );补偿,弥补,赎回 | |
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28 antiquated | |
adj.陈旧的,过时的 | |
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29 fussy | |
adj.为琐事担忧的,过分装饰的,爱挑剔的 | |
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30 malicious | |
adj.有恶意的,心怀恶意的 | |
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31 melancholy | |
n.忧郁,愁思;adj.令人感伤(沮丧)的,忧郁的 | |
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32 clergy | |
n.[总称]牧师,神职人员 | |
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33 steer | |
vt.驾驶,为…操舵;引导;vi.驾驶 | |
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34 espoused | |
v.(决定)支持,拥护(目标、主张等)( espouse的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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35 influential | |
adj.有影响的,有权势的 | |
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36 complimentary | |
adj.赠送的,免费的,赞美的,恭维的 | |
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37 peculiar | |
adj.古怪的,异常的;特殊的,特有的 | |
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38 snares | |
n.陷阱( snare的名词复数 );圈套;诱人遭受失败(丢脸、损失等)的东西;诱惑物v.用罗网捕捉,诱陷,陷害( snare的第三人称单数 ) | |
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39 ardent | |
adj.热情的,热烈的,强烈的,烈性的 | |
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40 follies | |
罪恶,时事讽刺剧; 愚蠢,蠢笨,愚蠢的行为、思想或做法( folly的名词复数 ) | |
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41 infinitely | |
adv.无限地,无穷地 | |
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42 opposition | |
n.反对,敌对 | |
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43 succor | |
n.援助,帮助;v.给予帮助 | |
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44 ardor | |
n.热情,狂热 | |
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45 adorned | |
[计]被修饰的 | |
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46 adventurous | |
adj.爱冒险的;惊心动魄的,惊险的,刺激的 | |
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47 discretion | |
n.谨慎;随意处理 | |
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48 maxims | |
n.格言,座右铭( maxim的名词复数 ) | |
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49 cape | |
n.海角,岬;披肩,短披风 | |
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50 vending | |
v.出售(尤指土地等财产)( vend的现在分词 );(尤指在公共场所)贩卖;发表(意见,言论);声明 | |
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51 maker | |
n.制造者,制造商 | |
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52 distinguished | |
adj.卓越的,杰出的,著名的 | |
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53 swerve | |
v.突然转向,背离;n.转向,弯曲,背离 | |
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54 juvenile | |
n.青少年,少年读物;adj.青少年的,幼稚的 | |
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55 dealers | |
n.商人( dealer的名词复数 );贩毒者;毒品贩子;发牌者 | |
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56 sundry | |
adj.各式各样的,种种的 | |
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57 starry | |
adj.星光照耀的, 闪亮的 | |
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58 emblem | |
n.象征,标志;徽章 | |
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59 awakens | |
v.(使)醒( awaken的第三人称单数 );(使)觉醒;弄醒;(使)意识到 | |
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60 abstruse | |
adj.深奥的,难解的 | |
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61 invaluable | |
adj.无价的,非常宝贵的,极为贵重的 | |
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62 forth | |
adv.向前;向外,往外 | |
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63 encumbered | |
v.妨碍,阻碍,拖累( encumber的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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64 outfit | |
n.(为特殊用途的)全套装备,全套服装 | |
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65 mince | |
n.切碎物;v.切碎,矫揉做作地说 | |
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66 pumpkin | |
n.南瓜 | |
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67 propounded | |
v.提出(问题、计划等)供考虑[讨论],提议( propound的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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68 expended | |
v.花费( expend的过去式和过去分词 );使用(钱等)做某事;用光;耗尽 | |
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69 cod | |
n.鳕鱼;v.愚弄;哄骗 | |
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70 beverages | |
n.饮料( beverage的名词复数 ) | |
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71 questionable | |
adj.可疑的,有问题的 | |
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72 heed | |
v.注意,留意;n.注意,留心 | |
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73 misgivings | |
n.疑虑,担忧,害怕;疑虑,担心,恐惧( misgiving的名词复数 );疑惧 | |
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74 fowls | |
鸟( fowl的名词复数 ); 禽肉; 既不是这; 非驴非马 | |
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75 watchfulness | |
警惕,留心; 警觉(性) | |
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76 blessings | |
n.(上帝的)祝福( blessing的名词复数 );好事;福分;因祸得福 | |
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77 hymn | |
n.赞美诗,圣歌,颂歌 | |
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78 rustic | |
adj.乡村的,有乡村特色的;n.乡下人,乡巴佬 | |
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79 exquisite | |
adj.精美的;敏锐的;剧烈的,感觉强烈的 | |
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80 lustrous | |
adj.有光泽的;光辉的 | |
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81 unison | |
n.步调一致,行动一致 | |
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82 nay | |
adv.不;n.反对票,投反对票者 | |
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83 crimson | |
n./adj.深(绯)红色(的);vi.脸变绯红色 | |
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84 joviality | |
n.快活 | |
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85 uncommon | |
adj.罕见的,非凡的,不平常的 | |
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86 mischievous | |
adj.调皮的,恶作剧的,有害的,伤人的 | |
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87 fussily | |
adv.无事空扰地,大惊小怪地,小题大做地 | |
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88 courteous | |
adj.彬彬有礼的,客气的 | |
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89 deranged | |
adj.疯狂的 | |
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90 Christian | |
adj.基督教徒的;n.基督教徒 | |
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91 steadily | |
adv.稳定地;不变地;持续地 | |
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92 tempt | |
vt.引诱,勾引,吸引,引起…的兴趣 | |
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93 demeanor | |
n.行为;风度 | |
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94 fortitude | |
n.坚忍不拔;刚毅 | |
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95 treasury | |
n.宝库;国库,金库;文库 | |
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96 tricky | |
adj.狡猾的,奸诈的;(工作等)棘手的,微妙的 | |
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97 mishap | |
n.不幸的事,不幸;灾祸 | |
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