"Forgotten something?" said he, when he saw me on his mat.
"No," said I, pushing past him without ceremony. And I led the way into his room with an impudence5 amazing to myself.
"Not come back for your revenge, have you? Because I'm afraid I can't give it to you single-handed. I was sorry myself that the others—"
We were face to face by his fireside, and I cut him short.
"Raffles," said I, "you may well be surprised at my coming back in this way and at this hour. I hardly know you. I was never in your rooms before to-night. But I fagged for you at school, and you said you remembered me. Of course that's no excuse; but will you listen to me—for two minutes?"
In my emotion I had at first to struggle for every word; but his face reassured8 me as I went on, and I was not mistaken in its expression.
"Certainly, my dear man," said he; "as many minutes as you like. Have a Sullivan and sit down." And he handed me his silver cigarette-case.
"No," said I, finding a full voice as I shook my head; "no, I won't smoke, and I won't sit down, thank you. Nor will you ask me to do either when you've heard what I have to say."
"Because you'll probably show me the door," I cried bitterly; "and you will be justified10 in doing it! But it's no use beating about the bush. You know I dropped over two hundred just now?"
He nodded.
"I hadn't the money in my pocket."
"I remember."
"But I had my check-book, and I wrote each of you a check at that desk."
"Well?"
"Not one of them was worth the paper it was written on, Raffles. I am overdrawn11 already at my bank!"
"Surely only for the moment?"
"No. I have spent everything."
"But somebody told me you were so well off. I heard you had come in for money?"
"So I did. Three years ago. It has been my curse; now it's all gone—every penny! Yes, I've been a fool; there never was nor will be such a fool as I've been.... Isn't this enough for you? Why don't you turn me out?" He was walking up and down with a very long face instead.
"Couldn't your people do anything?" he asked at length.
"Thank God," I cried, "I have no people! I was an only child. I came in for everything there was. My one comfort is that they're gone, and will never know."
I cast myself into a chair and hid my face. Raffles continued to pace the rich carpet that was of a piece with everything else in his rooms. There was no variation in his soft and even footfalls.
"You used to be a literary little cuss," he said at length; "didn't you edit the mag. before you left? Anyway I recollect12 fagging you to do my verses; and literature of all sorts is the very thing nowadays; any fool can make a living at it."
I shook my head. "Any fool couldn't write off my debts," said I.
"Then you have a flat somewhere?" he went on.
"Yes, in Mount Street."
"Well, what about the furniture?"
And at that Raffles stood still, with raised eyebrows and stern eyes that I could meet the better now that he knew the worst; then, with a shrug14, he resumed his walk, and for some minutes neither of us spoke15. But in his handsome, unmoved face I read my fate and death-warrant; and with every breath I cursed my folly16 and my cowardice17 in coming to him at all. Because he had been kind to me at school, when he was captain of the eleven, and I his fag, I had dared to look for kindness from him now; because I was ruined, and he rich enough to play cricket all the summer, and do nothing for the rest of the year, I had fatuously18 counted on his mercy, his sympathy, his help! Yes, I had relied on him in my heart, for all my outward diffidence and humility19; and I was rightly served. There was as little of mercy as of sympathy in that curling nostril20, that rigid21 jaw22, that cold blue eye which never glanced my way. I caught up my hat. I blundered to my feet. I would have gone without a word; but Raffles stood between me and the door.
"Where are you going?" said he.
"That's my business," I replied. "I won't trouble YOU any more."
"Then how am I to help you?"
"I didn't ask your help."
"Then why come to me?"
"Why, indeed!" I echoed. "Will you let me pass?"
"Not until you tell me where you are going and what you mean to do."
"Can't you guess?" I cried. And for many seconds we stood staring in each other's eyes.
"Have you got the pluck?" said he, breaking the spell in a tone so cynical23 that it brought my last drop of blood to the boil.
"You shall see," said I, as I stepped back and whipped the pistol from my overcoat pocket. "Now, will you let me pass or shall I do it here?"
The barrel touched my temple, and my thumb the trigger. Mad with excitement as I was, ruined, dishonored, and now finally determined24 to make an end of my misspent life, my only surprise to this day is that I did not do so then and there. The despicable satisfaction of involving another in one's destruction added its miserable25 appeal to my baser egoism; and had fear or horror flown to my companion's face, I shudder26 to think I might have died diabolically27 happy with that look for my last impious consolation28. It was the look that came instead which held my hand. Neither fear nor horror were in it; only wonder, admiration29, and such a measure of pleased expectancy30 as caused me after all to pocket my revolver with an oath.
"You devil!" I said. "I believe you wanted me to do it!"
"Not quite," was the reply, made with a little start, and a change of color that came too late. "To tell you the truth, though, I half thought you meant it, and I was never more fascinated in my life. I never dreamt you had such stuff in you, Bunny! No, I'm hanged if I let you go now. And you'd better not try that game again, for you won't catch me stand and look on a second time. We must think of some way out of the mess. I had no idea you were a chap of that sort! There, let me have the gun."
One of his hands fell kindly31 on my shoulder, while the other slipped into my overcoat pocket, and I suffered him to deprive me of my weapon without a murmur32. Nor was this simply because Raffles had the subtle power of making himself irresistible33 at will. He was beyond comparison the most masterful man whom I have ever known; yet my acquiescence34 was due to more than the mere3 subjection of the weaker nature to the stronger. The forlorn hope which had brought me to the Albany was turned as by magic into an almost staggering sense of safety. Raffles would help me after all! A. J. Raffles would be my friend! It was as though all the world had come round suddenly to my side; so far therefore from resisting his action, I caught and clasped his hand with a fervor35 as uncontrollable as the frenzy36 which had preceded it.
"God bless you!" I cried. "Forgive me for everything. I will tell you the truth. I DID think you might help me in my extremity37, though I well knew that I had no claim upon you. Still—for the old school's sake—the sake of old times—I thought you might give me another chance. If you wouldn't I meant to blow out my brains—and will still if you change your mind!"
In truth I feared that it was changing, with his expression, even as I spoke, and in spite of his kindly tone and kindlier use of my old school nickname. His next words showed me my mistake.
"What a boy it is for jumping to conclusions! I have my vices38, Bunny, but backing and filling is not one of them. Sit down, my good fellow, and have a cigarette to soothe39 your nerves. I insist. Whiskey? The worst thing for you; here's some coffee that I was brewing40 when you came in. Now listen to me. You speak of 'another chance.' What do you mean? Another chance at baccarat? Not if I know it! You think the luck must turn; suppose it didn't? We should only have made bad worse. No, my dear chap, you've plunged42 enough. Do you put yourself in my hands or do you not? Very well, then you plunge41 no more, and I undertake not to present my check. Unfortunately there are the other men; and still more unfortunately, Bunny, I'm as hard up at this moment as you are yourself!"
It was my turn to stare at Raffles. "You?" I vociferated. "You hard up? How am I to sit here and believe that?"
"Did I refuse to believe it of you?" he returned, smiling. "And, with your own experience, do you think that because a fellow has rooms in this place, and belongs to a club or two, and plays a little cricket, he must necessarily have a balance at the bank? I tell you, my dear man, that at this moment I'm as hard up as you ever were. I have nothing but my wits to live on—absolutely nothing else. It was as necessary for me to win some money this evening as it was for you. We're in the same boat, Bunny; we'd better pull together."
"Together!" I jumped at it. "I'll do anything in this world for you, Raffles," I said, "if you really mean that you won't give me away. Think of anything you like, and I'll do it! I was a desperate man when I came here, and I'm just as desperate now. I don't mind what I do if only I can get out of this without a scandal."
Again I see him, leaning back in one of the luxurious43 chairs with which his room was furnished. I see his indolent, athletic44 figure; his pale, sharp, clean-shaven features; his curly black hair; his strong, unscrupulous mouth. And again I feel the clear beam of his wonderful eye, cold and luminous45 as a star, shining into my brain—sifting the very secrets of my heart.
"I wonder if you mean all that!" he said at length. "You do in your present mood; but who can back his mood to last? Still, there's hope when a chap takes that tone. Now I think of it, too, you were a plucky46 little devil at school; you once did me rather a good turn, I recollect. Remember it, Bunny? Well, wait a bit, and perhaps I'll be able to do you a better one. Give me time to think."
He got up, lit a fresh cigarette, and fell to pacing the room once more, but with a slower and more thoughtful step, and for a much longer period than before. Twice he stopped at my chair as though on the point of speaking, but each time he checked himself and resumed his stride in silence. Once he threw up the window, which he had shut some time since, and stood for some moments leaning out into the fog which filled the Albany courtyard. Meanwhile a clock on the chimney-piece struck one, and one again for the half-hour, without a word between us.
Yet I not only kept my chair with patience, but I acquired an incongruous equanimity47 in that half-hour. Insensibly I had shifted my burden to the broad shoulders of this splendid friend, and my thoughts wandered with my eyes as the minutes passed. The room was the good-sized, square one, with the folding doors, the marble mantel-piece, and the gloomy, old-fashioned distinction peculiar48 to the Albany. It was charmingly furnished and arranged, with the right amount of negligence49 and the right amount of taste. What struck me most, however, was the absence of the usual insignia of a cricketer's den6. Instead of the conventional rack of war-worn bats, a carved oak bookcase, with every shelf in a litter, filled the better part of one wall; and where I looked for cricketing groups, I found reproductions of such works as "Love and Death" and "The Blessed Damozel," in dusty frames and different parallels. The man might have been a minor50 poet instead of an athlete of the first water. But there had always been a fine streak51 of aestheticism in his complex composition; some of these very pictures I had myself dusted in his study at school; and they set me thinking of yet another of his many sides—and of the little incident to which he had just referred.
Everybody knows how largely the tone of a public school depends on that of the eleven, and on the character of the captain of cricket in particular; and I have never heard it denied that in A. J. Raffles's time our tone was good, or that such influence as he troubled to exert was on the side of the angels. Yet it was whispered in the school that he was in the habit of parading the town at night in loud checks and a false beard. It was whispered, and disbelieved. I alone knew it for a fact; for night after night had I pulled the rope up after him when the rest of the dormitory were asleep, and kept awake by the hour to let it down again on a given signal. Well, one night he was over-bold, and within an ace7 of ignominious52 expulsion in the hey-day of his fame. Consummate53 daring and extraordinary nerve on his part, aided, doubtless, by some little presence of mind on mine, averted54 the untoward55 result; and no more need be said of a discreditable incident. But I cannot pretend to have forgotten it in throwing myself on this man's mercy in my desperation. And I was wondering how much of his leniency56 was owing to the fact that Raffles had not forgotten it either, when he stopped and stood over my chair once more.
"I've been thinking of that night we had the narrow squeak," he began. "Why do you start?"
"I was thinking of it too."
He smiled, as though he had read my thoughts.
"Well, you were the right sort of little beggar then, Bunny; you didn't talk and you didn't flinch57. You asked no questions and you told no tales. I wonder if you're like that now?"
"I don't know," said I, slightly puzzled by his tone. "I've made such a mess of my own affairs that I trust myself about as little as I'm likely to be trusted by anybody else. Yet I never in my life went back on a friend. I will say that, otherwise perhaps I mightn't be in such a hole to-night."
"Exactly," said Raffles, nodding to himself, as though in assent58 to some hidden train of thought; "exactly what I remember of you, and I'll bet it's as true now as it was ten years ago. We don't alter, Bunny. We only develop. I suppose neither you nor I are really altered since you used to let down that rope and I used to come up it hand over hand. You would stick at nothing for a pal—what?"
"At nothing in this world," I was pleased to cry.
"Not even at a crime?" said Raffles, smiling.
I stopped to think, for his tone had changed, and I felt sure he was chaffing me. Yet his eye seemed as much in earnest as ever, and for my part I was in no mood for reservations.
"No, not even at that," I declared; "name your crime, and I'm your man."
He looked at me one moment in wonder, and another moment in doubt; then turned the matter off with a shake of his head, and the little cynical laugh that was all his own.
"You're a nice chap, Bunny! A real desperate character—what? Suicide one moment, and any crime I like the next! What you want is a drag, my boy, and you did well to come to a decent law-abiding citizen with a reputation to lose. None the less we must have that money to-night—by hook or crook59."
"To-night, Raffles?"
"The sooner the better. Every hour after ten o'clock to-morrow morning is an hour of risk. Let one of those checks get round to your own bank, and you and it are dishonored together. No, we must raise the wind to-night and re-open your account first thing to-morrow. And I rather think I know where the wind can be raised."
"At two o'clock in the morning?"
"Yes."
"But how—but where—at such an hour?"
"From a friend of mine here in Bond Street."
"He must be a very intimate friend!"
"Intimate's not the word. I have the run of his place and a latch-key all to myself."
"You would knock him up at this hour of the night?"
"If he's in bed."
"And it's essential that I should go in with you?"
"Absolutely."
"Then I must; but I'm bound to say I don't like the idea, Raffles."
"Do you prefer the alternative?" asked my companion, with a sneer60. "No, hang it, that's unfair!" he cried apologetically in the same breath. "I quite understand. It's a beastly ordeal61. But it would never do for you to stay outside. I tell you what, you shall have a peg62 before we start—just one. There's the whiskey, here's a syphon, and I'll be putting on an overcoat while you help yourself."
Well, I daresay I did so with some freedom, for this plan of his was not the less distasteful to me from its apparent inevitability63. I must own, however, that it possessed64 fewer terrors before my glass was empty. Meanwhile Raffles rejoined me, with a covert65 coat over his blazer, and a soft felt hat set carelessly on the curly head he shook with a smile as I passed him the decanter.
"When we come back," said he. "Work first, play afterward66. Do you see what day it is?" he added, tearing a leaflet from a Shakespearian calendar, as I drained my glass. "March 15th. 'The Ides of March, the Ides of March, remember.' Eh, Bunny, my boy? You won't forget them, will you?"
And, with a laugh, he threw some coals on the fire before turning down the gas like a careful householder. So we went out together as the clock on the chimney-piece was striking two.
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1
strewed
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| v.撒在…上( strew的过去式和过去分词 )；散落于；点缀；撒满 | |
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2
raffles
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| n.抽彩售物( raffle的名词复数 )v.以抽彩方式售（物）( raffle的第三人称单数 ) | |
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mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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eyebrows
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| 眉毛( eyebrow的名词复数 ) | |
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impudence
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| n.厚颜无耻；冒失；无礼 | |
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den
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| n.兽穴；秘密地方；安静的小房间，私室 | |
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7
ace
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| n.A牌；发球得分；佼佼者；adj.杰出的 | |
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8
reassured
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| adj.使消除疑虑的；使放心的v.再保证，恢复信心( reassure的过去式和过去分词) | |
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lighting
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| n.照明，光线的明暗，舞台灯光 | |
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justified
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| a.正当的，有理的 | |
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overdrawn
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| 透支( overdraw的过去分词 )； (overdraw的过去分词) | |
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12
recollect
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| v.回忆，想起，记起，忆起，记得 | |
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misery
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| n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦 | |
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14
shrug
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| v.耸肩(表示怀疑、冷漠、不知等) | |
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15
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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16
folly
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| n.愚笨，愚蠢，蠢事，蠢行，傻话 | |
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cowardice
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| n.胆小，怯懦 | |
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fatuously
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| adv.愚昧地，昏庸地，蠢地 | |
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humility
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| n.谦逊，谦恭 | |
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nostril
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| n.鼻孔 | |
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21
rigid
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| adj.严格的，死板的；刚硬的，僵硬的 | |
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jaw
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| n.颚，颌，说教，流言蜚语；v.喋喋不休，教训 | |
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23
cynical
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| adj.(对人性或动机)怀疑的，不信世道向善的 | |
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determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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shudder
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| v.战粟，震动，剧烈地摇晃；n.战粟，抖动 | |
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27
diabolically
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consolation
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| n.安慰，慰问 | |
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admiration
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| n.钦佩，赞美，羡慕 | |
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30
expectancy
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| n.期望，预期，（根据概率统计求得）预期数额 | |
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31
kindly
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| adj.和蔼的，温和的，爽快的；adv.温和地，亲切地 | |
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32
murmur
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| n.低语，低声的怨言；v.低语，低声而言 | |
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33
irresistible
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| adj.非常诱人的，无法拒绝的，无法抗拒的 | |
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acquiescence
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| n.默许；顺从 | |
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fervor
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| n.热诚；热心；炽热 | |
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frenzy
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| n.疯狂，狂热，极度的激动 | |
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extremity
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| n.末端，尽头；尽力；终极；极度 | |
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38
vices
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| 缺陷( vice的名词复数 )； 恶习； 不道德行为； 台钳 | |
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39
soothe
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| v.安慰；使平静；使减轻；缓和；奉承 | |
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40
brewing
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| n. 酿造, 一次酿造的量 动词brew的现在分词形式 | |
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41
plunge
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| v.跳入，(使)投入，(使)陷入；猛冲 | |
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42
plunged
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| v.颠簸( plunge的过去式和过去分词 )；暴跌；骤降；突降 | |
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43
luxurious
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| adj.精美而昂贵的；豪华的 | |
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44
athletic
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| adj.擅长运动的，强健的；活跃的，体格健壮的 | |
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45
luminous
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| adj.发光的，发亮的；光明的；明白易懂的；有启发的 | |
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46
plucky
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| adj.勇敢的 | |
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47
equanimity
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| n.沉着，镇定 | |
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48
peculiar
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| adj.古怪的，异常的；特殊的，特有的 | |
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49
negligence
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| n.疏忽，玩忽，粗心大意 | |
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50
minor
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| adj.较小(少)的，较次要的；n.辅修学科；vi.辅修 | |
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51
streak
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| n.条理，斑纹，倾向，少许，痕迹；v.加条纹，变成条纹，奔驰，快速移动 | |
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52
ignominious
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| adj.可鄙的，不光彩的，耻辱的 | |
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53
consummate
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| adj.完美的；v.成婚；使完美 [反]baffle | |
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54
averted
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| 防止，避免( avert的过去式和过去分词 )； 转移 | |
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55
untoward
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| adj.不利的，不幸的，困难重重的 | |
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56
leniency
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| n.宽大（不严厉） | |
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57
flinch
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| v.畏缩，退缩 | |
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58
assent
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| v.批准，认可；n.批准，认可 | |
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59
crook
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| v.使弯曲；n.小偷，骗子，贼；弯曲(处) | |
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60
sneer
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| v.轻蔑；嘲笑；n.嘲笑，讥讽的言语 | |
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61
ordeal
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| n.苦难经历，（尤指对品格、耐力的）严峻考验 | |
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62
peg
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| n.木栓，木钉；vt.用木钉钉，用短桩固定 | |
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63
inevitability
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| n.必然性 | |
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64
possessed
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| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
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65
covert
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| adj.隐藏的；暗地里的 | |
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66
afterward
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| adv.后来；以后 | |
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