IN WHICH A LAW IS SEEN TO SERVE BASE PURPOSES
MARIA has passed a night of unhappiness. Hopes and fears are knelling1 in the morning, which brings nothing to relieve her anxiety for the absent one; and Mr. Snivel has taken the precaution to have the news of the lost ship find its way into the papers.
And while our city seems in a state of very general excitement; while great placards on every street corner inform the wondering stranger that a mighty2 Convention (presided over by the Hon. S. Snivel) for dissolving the Union, is shortly to be holden; while our political world has got the Union on its shoulders, and threatens to throw it into the nearest ditch; while our streets swarm3 with long, lean, and very hairy-faced delegates (all lusty of war and secession), who have dragged themselves into the city to drink no end of whiskey, and say all sorts of foolish things their savage4 and half-civilized constituents5 are expected to applaud; while our more material and conservative citizens are thinking what asses6 we make of ourselves; while the ship-of-war we built to fight the rest of the Union, lies an ugly lump in the harbor, and "won't go over the bar;" while the "shoe-factory" we established to supply niggerdom with soles, is snuffed out for want of energy and capacity to manage it; while some of our non-slaveholding, but most active secession merchants, are moving seriously in the great project of establishing a "SOUTHERN CANDLE-FACTORY"--a thing much needed in the "up-country;" while our graver statesmen (who don't get the State out of the Union fast enough for the ignorant rabble7, who have nothing but their folly8 at stake) are pondering over the policy of spending five hundred thousand dollars for the building of another war-ship-one that "will go over the bar;" and while curiously-written letters from Generals Commander and Quattlebum, offering to bring their allied9 forces into the field-to blow this confederation down at a breath whenever called upon, are being published, to the great joy of all secessiondom; while saltpetre, broadswords, and the muskets10 made for us by Yankees to fight Yankees, and which were found to have wood instead of flint in their hammers, (and which trick of the Yankees we said was just like the Yankees,) are in great demand-and a few of our mob-politicians, who are all "Kern'ls" of regiments11 that never muster12, prove conclusively13 our necessity for keeping a fighting-man in Congress; while, we assert, many of our first and best known families have sunk the assemblies of the St. Cecilia in the more important question of what order of government will best suit-in the event of our getting happily out of the Union!--our refined and very exacting14 state of society;--whether an Empire or a Monarchy15, and whether we ought to set up a Quattlebum or Commander dynasty?-whether the Bungle16 family or the Jungle family (both fighting families) will have a place nearest the throne; what sort of orders will be bestowed17, who will get them, and what colored liveries will best become us (all of which grave questions threaten us with a very extensive war of families)?--while all these great matters find us in a sea of trouble, there enters the curiosity-shop of the old Antiquary a suspicious-looking individual in green spectacles.
"Mr. Hardscrabble!" says the man, bowing and taking a seat, leisurely18, upon the decrepid sofa. Mr. McArthur returns his salutation, contemplates19 him doubtingly for a minute, then resumes his fussing and brushing.
The small, lean figure; the somewhat seedy broadcloth in which it is enveloped20; the well-browned and very sharp features; the straight, dark-gray hair, and the absent manner of Mr. Hardscrabble, might, with the uninitiated, cause him to be mistaken for an "up-country" clergyman of the Methodist denomination21.
"Mr. Hardscrabble? Mr. Hardscrabble? Mr. Hardscrabble?" muses22 the Antiquary, canting his head wisely, "the Sheriff, as I'm a man of years!"
Mr. Hardscrabble comforts his eyes with his spectacles, and having glanced vacantly over the little shop, as if to take an inventory23 of its contents, draws from his breast-pocket a paper containing very ominous24 seals and scrawls25.
"I'm reluctant about doing these things with an old man like you," Mr. Hardscrabble condescends26 to say, in a sharp, grating voice; "but I have to obey the demands of my office." Here he commences reading the paper to the trembling old man, who, having adjusted his broad-bowed spectacles, and arrayed them against the spectacles of Mr. Hardscrabble, says he thinks it contains a great many useless recapitulations.
Mr. Hardscrabble, his eyes peering eagerly through his glasses, and his lower jaw27 falling and exposing the inner domain28 of his mouth, replies with an--"Umph." The old Antiquary was never before called upon to examine a document so confusing to his mind. Not content with a surrender of his property, it demands his body into the bargain-all at the suit of one Keepum. He makes several motions to go show it to his daughter; but that, Mr. Hardscrabble thinks, is scarce worth while. "I sympathize with you-knowing how frugal29 you have been through life. A list of your effects-if you have one-will save a deal of trouble. I fear (Mr. Hardscrabble works his quid) my costs will hardly come out of them."
"There's a fortune in them-if the love of things of yore--" The old man hesitates, and shakes his head dolefully.
"Yore!--a thing that would starve out our profession."
"A little time to turn, you know. There's my stock of uniforms."
"Well-I-know," Mr. Hardscrabble rejoins, with a drawl; "but I must lock up the traps. Yes, I must lock you up, and sell you out-unless you redeem30 before sale day; that you can't do, I suppose?"
And while the old man totters31 into the little back parlor32, and, giving way to his emotions, throws himself upon the bosom33 of his fond daughter, to whom he discloses his troubles, Mr. Hardscrabble puts locks and bolts upon his curiosity-shop. This important business done, he leads the old man away, and gives him a lodging34 in the old jail.
点击收听单词发音
1 knelling | |
v.丧钟声( knell的现在分词 );某事物结束的象征 | |
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2 mighty | |
adj.强有力的;巨大的 | |
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3 swarm | |
n.(昆虫)等一大群;vi.成群飞舞;蜂拥而入 | |
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4 savage | |
adj.野蛮的;凶恶的,残暴的;n.未开化的人 | |
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5 constituents | |
n.选民( constituent的名词复数 );成分;构成部分;要素 | |
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6 asses | |
n. 驴,愚蠢的人,臀部 adv. (常用作后置)用于贬损或骂人 | |
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7 rabble | |
n.乌合之众,暴民;下等人 | |
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8 folly | |
n.愚笨,愚蠢,蠢事,蠢行,傻话 | |
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9 allied | |
adj.协约国的;同盟国的 | |
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10 muskets | |
n.火枪,(尤指)滑膛枪( musket的名词复数 ) | |
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11 regiments | |
(军队的)团( regiment的名词复数 ); 大量的人或物 | |
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12 muster | |
v.集合,收集,鼓起,激起;n.集合,检阅,集合人员,点名册 | |
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13 conclusively | |
adv.令人信服地,确凿地 | |
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14 exacting | |
adj.苛求的,要求严格的 | |
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15 monarchy | |
n.君主,最高统治者;君主政体,君主国 | |
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16 bungle | |
v.搞糟;n.拙劣的工作 | |
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17 bestowed | |
赠给,授予( bestow的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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18 leisurely | |
adj.悠闲的;从容的,慢慢的 | |
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19 contemplates | |
深思,细想,仔细考虑( contemplate的第三人称单数 ); 注视,凝视; 考虑接受(发生某事的可能性); 深思熟虑,沉思,苦思冥想 | |
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20 enveloped | |
v.包围,笼罩,包住( envelop的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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21 denomination | |
n.命名,取名,(度量衡、货币等的)单位 | |
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22 muses | |
v.沉思,冥想( muse的第三人称单数 );沉思自语说(某事) | |
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23 inventory | |
n.详细目录,存货清单 | |
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24 ominous | |
adj.不祥的,不吉的,预兆的,预示的 | |
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25 scrawls | |
潦草的笔迹( scrawl的名词复数 ) | |
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26 condescends | |
屈尊,俯就( condescend的第三人称单数 ); 故意表示和蔼可亲 | |
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27 jaw | |
n.颚,颌,说教,流言蜚语;v.喋喋不休,教训 | |
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28 domain | |
n.(活动等)领域,范围;领地,势力范围 | |
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29 frugal | |
adj.节俭的,节约的,少量的,微量的 | |
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30 redeem | |
v.买回,赎回,挽回,恢复,履行(诺言等) | |
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31 totters | |
v.走得或动得不稳( totter的第三人称单数 );踉跄;蹒跚;摇摇欲坠 | |
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32 parlor | |
n.店铺,营业室;会客室,客厅 | |
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33 bosom | |
n.胸,胸部;胸怀;内心;adj.亲密的 | |
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34 lodging | |
n.寄宿,住所;(大学生的)校外宿舍 | |
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