“Have I killed him? I didn’t want to. I tell you, I didn’t want to.”
Figures rushed in between. Hands grasped me, impelled6 me away, through a haze7; voices spoke8 in my ear while I feebly resisted, a warm salty taste in my throat.
“I killed him. I didn’t want to kill him. He made me do it. He shot first.”
“Yes, yes,” they said, soothing9 gruffly. “Shore he did; shore you didn’t. It’s all right. Come along, come along.”
Then——
“Pick him up. He’s bad hurt, himself. See that blood? No, ’tain’t his arm, is it? He’s bleedin’ internal. Whar’s the hole? Wait! He’s busted10 something.”
They would have carried me.
“No,” I cried, while their bearded faces swam. “He said ‘’Nuf’—he shot me afterward11. Not bad, is it? I can walk.”
As they hustled13 me onward14 I wiped my swollen15 lips; the back of my hand seemed to be covered with thin blood.
“Yes, mebbe so. But come along, come along. We’ll tend to you.”
The world had grown curiously17 darkened, so that we moved as through an obscuring veil; and I dumbly wondered whether this was night (had it been morning or evening when I started for the pond?) or whether I was dying myself. I peered and again made out the sober, stern faces hedging me, but they gave me no answer to my mutely anxious query19. Across a great distance we stumbled by the wagons21 (the same wagons of a time agone), and halted at a fire.
“Set down. Fetch a blanket, somebody. Whar’s the water? Set down till we look you over.”
I let them sit me down.
“Wash your mouth out.”
That was done, pinkish; and a second time, clearer.
“You’re all right.” Jenks apparently22 was ministering to me. “Swaller this.”
The odor of whiskey fumed23 into my nostrils24. I obediently swallowed, and gasped25 and choked. Jenks wiped my face with a sopping26 cloth. Hands were rummaging27 at my left arm; a bandage being wound about.
“Nothin’ much,” was the report. “Creased him, is all. Lucky he dodged28. It was comin’ straight for his heart.”
“He’s all right,” Jenks again asserted.
Under the bidding of the liquor the faintness from the exertion29 and reaction was leaving me. The slight hemorrhage from the strain to my weak lungs had ceased. I would live, I would live. But he—Daniel?
“Did I kill him?” I besought30. “Not that! I didn’t aim—I don’t know how I shot—but I had to. Didn’t I?”
“You did. He’ll not bother you ag’in. She’s yourn.”
That hurt.
“But it wasn’t about her, it wasn’t over Mrs. Montoyo. He bullied31 me—dared me. We were man to man, boys. He made me fight him.”
“Yes, shore,” they agreed—and they were not believing. They still linked me with a woman, whereas she had figured only as a transient occasion.
Then she herself, My Lady, appeared, running in breathless and appealing.
“Is Mr. Beeson hurt? Badly? Where is he? Let me help.”
“No, he’s all right, ma’am.”
“I’m all right, I assure you,” I mumbled33 thickly, and helpless as a babe to the clinging of her cold fingers.
“I don’t know. He was carried away. But I think he’s dead. I hope so—oh, I hope so. The coward, the beast!”
“There, there,” they quieted. “That’s all over with. What he got is his own business now. He hankered for it and was bound to have it. You’d best stay right hyar a spell. It’s the place for you at present.”
They grouped apart, on the edge of the flickering35 fire circle. The dusk had heightened apace (for nightfall this really was), the glow and flicker36 barely touched their blackly outlined forms, the murmur37 of their voices sounded ominous38. In the circle we two sat, her hand upon mine, thrilling me comfortably yet abashing39 me. She surveyed me unwinkingly and grave—a triumph shining from her eyes albeit40 there were seamy shadows etched into her white face. It was as though she were welcoming me through the outposts of hell.
“You killed him. I knew you would—I knew you’d have to.”
“I knew it, too,” I miserably41 faltered42. “But I 256didn’t want to—I shot without thinking. I might have waited.”
“Waited! How could you wait? ’Twas either you or he.”
“Then I wish it had been I,” I attempted.
“What nonsense,” she flashed. “We all know you did your best to avoid it. But tell me: Do you think I dragged you into it? Do you hate me for it?”
“No. It happened when you were there. That’s all. I’m sorry; only sorry. What’s to be done next?”
“That will be decided43, of course,” she said. “You will be protected, if necessary. You acted in self-defense. They all will swear to that and back you up.”
“But you?” I asked, arousing from this unmanly despair which played me for a weakling. “You must be protected also. You can’t go to that other camp, can you?”
She laughed and withdrew her hand; laughed hardly, even scornfully.
“I? Above all things, don’t concern yourself about me, please. I shall take care of myself. He is out of the way. You have freed me of that much, Mr. Beeson, whether intentionally44 or not. And you shall be free, yourself, to act as your friends advise. You must leave me out of your plans altogether. Yes, I know; you killed him. Why not? But he wasn’t a man; he was a wild animal. And you’ll find there are matters more serious than killing45 even a man, in this country.”
“You! You!” I insisted. “You shall be looked out for. We are partners in this. He used your name; he made that an excuse. We shall have to make some new arrangements for you—put you on the stage as soon as we can. And meanwhile——”
“There is no partnership46, and I shall require no looking after, sir,” she interrupted. “If you are sorry that you killed him, I am not; but you are entirely47 free.”
The group at the edge of the fire circle dissolved. Jenks came and seated himself upon his hams, beside us.
“Wall, how you feelin’ now?” he questioned of me.
“I’m myself again,” said I.
“Your arm won’t trouble you. Jest a flesh wound. There’s nothin’ better than axle grease. And you, ma’am?”
“Perfectly well, thank you.”
“You’re the coolest of the lot, and no mistake,” he praised admiringly. “Wall, there’ll be no more fracas48 to-night. Anyhow, the boys’ll be on guard ag’in it; they’re out now. You two can eat and rest a bit, whilst gettin’ good and ready; and if you set out ’fore moon-up you can easy get cl’ar, with what help we 258give you. We’ll furnish mounts, grub, anything you need. I’ll make shift without Frank.”
“Mounts!” I blurted49, with a start that waked my arm to throbbing50. “‘Set out,’ you say? Why? And where?”
“Anywhar. The stage road south’ard is your best bet. You didn’t think to stay, did you? Not after that—after you’d plugged a Mormon, the son of the old man, besides! We reckoned you two had it arranged, by this time.”
“No! Never!” I protested. “You’re crazy, man. I’ve never dreamed of any such thing; nor Mrs. Montoyo, either. You mean that I—we—should run away? I’ll not leave the train and neither shall she, until the proper time. Or do I understand that you disown us; turn your backs upon us; deliver us over?”
“Hold on,” Jenks bade. “You’re barkin’ up the wrong tree. ’Tain’t a question of disownin’ you. Hell, we’d fight for you and proud to do it, for you’re white. But I tell you, you’ve killed one o’ that party ahead, you’ve killed the wagon20 boss’s son; and Hyrum, he’s consider’ble of a man himself. He stands well up, in the church. But lettin’ that alone, he’s captain of this train, he’s got a dozen and more men back of him; and when he comes in the mornin’ demandin’ of you for trial by his Mormons, what can we do? Might fight him off; yes. Not forever, though. He’s nearest to the water, sech as it is, and 259our casks are half empty, critters dry. We sha’n’t surrender you; if we break with him we break ourselves and likely lose our scalps into the bargain. Why, we hadn’t any idee but that you and her were all primed to light out, with our help. For if you stay you won’t be safe anywhere betwixt here and Salt Lake; and over in Utah they’ll vigilant51 you, shore as kingdom. As for you, ma’am,” he bluntly addressed, “we’d protect you to the best of ability, o’ course; but you can see for yourself that Hyrum won’t feel none too kindly52 toward you, and that if you’ll pull out along with Beeson as soon as convenient you’ll avoid a heap of unpleasantness. We’ll take the chance on sneakin’ you both away, and facin’ the old man.”
“Mr. Beeson should go,” she said. “But I shall return to the Adams camp. I am not afraid, sir.”
“Tut, tut!” he rapped. “I know you’re not afraid; nevertheless we won’t let you do it.”
“They wouldn’t lay hands on me.”
“Um-m,” he mused53. “Mebbe not. No, reckon they wouldn’t. I’ll say that much. But by thunder they’d make you wish they did. They’d claim you trapped Dan’l. You’d suffer for that, and in place of this boy, and a-plenty. Better foller your new man, lady, and let him stow you in safety. Better go back to Benton.”
“Never to Benton,” she declared. “And he’s not 260my ’new man.’ I apologize to him for that, from you, sir.”
“If you stay, I stay, then,” said I. “But I think we’d best go. It’s the only way.” And it was. We were twain in menace to the outfit54 and to each other but inseparable. We were yoked55. The fact appalled56. It gripped me coldly. I seemed to have bargained for her with word and fist and bullet, and won her; now I should appear to carry her off as my booty: a wife and a gambler’s wife. Yet such must be.
“You shall go without me.”
“I shall not.”
“If you don’t hate me now you soon will,” she uttered. “The cards don’t fall right—they don’t, they don’t. They’ve been against me from the first. I’m always forcing the play.”
Whereupon I knew that go together we should, or I was no man.
“Pshaw, pshaw,” Jenks soothed57. “Matters ain’t so bad. We’ll fix ye out and cover your trail. Moon’ll be up in a couple o’ hours. I’d advise you to take an hour’s start of it, so as to get away easier. If you travel straight south’ard you’ll strike the stage road sometime in the mornin’. When you reach a station you’ll have ch’ice either way.”
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1
gaping
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| adj.口的；张口的；敞口的；多洞穴的v.目瞪口呆地凝视( gape的现在分词 )；张开，张大 | |
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prone
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| adj.(to)易于…的，很可能…的；俯卧的 | |
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posture
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| n.姿势，姿态，心态，态度；v.作出某种姿势 | |
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standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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5
babbling
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| n.胡说，婴儿发出的咿哑声adj.胡说的v.喋喋不休( babble的现在分词 )；作潺潺声（如流水）；含糊不清地说话；泄漏秘密 | |
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6
impelled
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| v.推动、推进或敦促某人做某事( impel的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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haze
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| n.霾，烟雾；懵懂，迷糊；vi.(over)变模糊 | |
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8
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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9
soothing
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| adj.慰藉的；使人宽心的；镇静的 | |
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10
busted
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| adj. 破产了的，失败了的，被降级的，被逮捕的，被抓到的 动词bust的过去式和过去分词 | |
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11
afterward
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| adv.后来；以后 | |
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12
creased
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| （使…）起折痕，弄皱( crease的过去式和过去分词 )； （皮肤）皱起，使起皱纹； 皱皱巴巴 | |
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13
hustled
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| 催促（hustle的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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onward
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| adj.向前的，前进的；adv.向前，前进，在先 | |
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15
swollen
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| adj.肿大的，水涨的；v.使变大，肿胀 | |
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16
wheezed
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| v.喘息，发出呼哧呼哧的喘息声( wheeze的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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17
curiously
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| adv.有求知欲地；好问地；奇特地 | |
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sob
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| n.空间轨道的轰炸机；呜咽，哭泣 | |
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query
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| n.疑问，问号，质问；vt.询问，表示怀疑 | |
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wagon
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| n.四轮马车，手推车，面包车；无盖运货列车 | |
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21
wagons
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| n.四轮的运货马车( wagon的名词复数 )；铁路货车；小手推车 | |
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22
apparently
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| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
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23
fumed
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| 愤怒( fume的过去式和过去分词 )； 大怒； 发怒； 冒烟 | |
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24
nostrils
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| 鼻孔( nostril的名词复数 ) | |
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25
gasped
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| v.喘气( gasp的过去式和过去分词 )；喘息；倒抽气；很想要 | |
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26
sopping
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| adj. 浑身湿透的 动词sop的现在分词形式 | |
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27
rummaging
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| 翻找，搜寻( rummage的现在分词 )； 海关检查 | |
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28
dodged
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| v.闪躲( dodge的过去式和过去分词 )；回避 | |
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exertion
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| n.尽力，努力 | |
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besought
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| v.恳求，乞求（某事物）( beseech的过去式和过去分词 )；(beseech的过去式与过去分词) | |
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31
bullied
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| adj.被欺负了v.恐吓，威逼( bully的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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32
imploring
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| 恳求的，哀求的 | |
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33
mumbled
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| 含糊地说某事，叽咕，咕哝( mumble的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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34
abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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35
flickering
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| adj.闪烁的，摇曳的，一闪一闪的 | |
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36
flicker
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| vi./n.闪烁，摇曳，闪现 | |
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37
murmur
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| n.低语，低声的怨言；v.低语，低声而言 | |
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38
ominous
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| adj.不祥的，不吉的，预兆的，预示的 | |
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39
abashing
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| v.使羞愧，使局促，使窘迫( abash的现在分词 ) | |
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40
albeit
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| conj.即使；纵使；虽然 | |
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41
miserably
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| adv.痛苦地；悲惨地；糟糕地；极度地 | |
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42
faltered
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| （嗓音）颤抖( falter的过去式和过去分词 )； 支吾其词； 蹒跚； 摇晃 | |
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43
decided
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| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
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44
intentionally
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| ad.故意地，有意地 | |
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45
killing
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| n.巨额利润；突然赚大钱，发大财 | |
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46
partnership
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| n.合作关系，伙伴关系 | |
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47
entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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48
fracas
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| n.打架；吵闹 | |
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49
blurted
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| v.突然说出，脱口而出( blurt的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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50
throbbing
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| a. 跳动的,悸动的 | |
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51
vigilant
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| adj.警觉的，警戒的，警惕的 | |
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52
kindly
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| adj.和蔼的，温和的，爽快的；adv.温和地，亲切地 | |
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53
mused
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| v.沉思，冥想( muse的过去式和过去分词 )；沉思自语说（某事） | |
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54
outfit
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| n.（为特殊用途的）全套装备，全套服装 | |
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55
yoked
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| 结合（yoke的过去式形式） | |
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56
appalled
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| v.使惊骇，使充满恐惧( appall的过去式和过去分词)adj.惊骇的；丧胆的 | |
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57
soothed
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| v.安慰( soothe的过去式和过去分词 )；抚慰；使舒服；减轻痛苦 | |
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58
erect
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| n./v.树立，建立，使竖立；adj.直立的，垂直的 | |
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