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CHAPTER XIII
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 Alec's first visit was to Lucy. No one knew that he had arrived, and after changing his clothes at the rooms in Pall1 Mall that he had taken for the summer, he walked to Charles Street. His heart leaped as he strolled up the hill of St. James Street, bright by a fortunate chance with the sunshine of a summer day; and he rejoiced in the gaiety of the well-dressed youths who sauntered down, bound for one or other of the clubs, taking off their hats with a rapid smile of recognition to charming women who sat in victorias or in electric cars. There was an air of opulence2 in the broad street, of a civilisation3 refined without brutality5, which was very grateful to his eyes accustomed for so long to the wilderness6 of Africa.
 
The gods were favourable7 to his wishes that day, for Lucy was at home; she sat in the drawing-room, by the window, reading a novel. At her side were masses of flowers, and his first glimpse of her was against a great bowl of roses. The servant announced his name, and she sprang up with a cry. She flushed with excitement, and then the blood fled from her cheeks, and she became extraordinarily8 pale. Alec noticed that she was whiter and thinner than when last he had seen her; but she was more beautiful.
 
'I didn't expect you so soon,' she faltered9.
 
And then unaccountably tears came to her eyes. Falling back into her chair, she hid her face. Her heart began to beat painfully.
 
'You must forgive me,' she said, trying to smile. 'I can't help being very silly.'
 
For days Lucy had lived in an agony of terror, fearing this meeting, and now it had come upon her unexpectedly. More than four years had passed since last they had seen one another, and they had been years of anxiety and distress10. She was certain that she had changed, and looking with pitiful dread11 in the glass, she told herself that she was pale and dull. She was nearly thirty. There were lines about her eyes, and her mouth had a bitter droop12. She had no mercy on herself. She would not minimise the ravages13 of time, and with a brutal4 frankness insisted on seeing herself as she might be in ten years, when an increasing leanness, emphasising the lines and increasing the prominence14 of her features, made her still more haggard. She was seized with utter dismay. He might have ceased to love her. His life had been so full, occupied with strenuous15 adventures, while hers had been used up in waiting, only in waiting. It was natural enough that the strength of her passion should only have increased, but it was natural too that his should have vanished before a more urgent preoccupation. And what had she to offer him now? She turned away from the glass because her tears blurred16 the image it presented; and if she looked forward to the first meeting with vehement17 eagerness, it was also with sickening dread.
 
And now she was so troubled that she could not adopt the attitude of civil friendliness18 which she had intended in order to show him that she made no claim upon him. She wanted to seem quite collected so that her behaviour should not lead him to think her heart at all affected19, but she could only watch his eyes hungrily. She braced20 herself to restrain a wail21 of sorrow if she saw his disillusionment. He talked in order to give time for her to master her agitation22.
 
'I was afraid there would be interviewers and boring people generally to meet me if I came by the boat by which I was expected, so I got into another, and I've arrived a day before my time.'
 
She was calmer now, and though she did not speak, she looked at him with strained attention, hanging on his words.
 
He was very bronzed, thin after his recent illness, but he looked well and strong. His manner had the noble self-confidence which had delighted her of old, and he spoke23 with the quiet deliberation she loved. Now and then a faint inflection betrayed his Scottish birth.
 
'I felt that I owed my first visit to you. Can you ever forgive me that I have not brought George home to you?'
 
Lucy gave a sudden gasp24. And with bitter self-reproach she realised that in the cruel joy of seeing Alec once more she had forgotten her brother. She was ashamed. It was but eighteen months since he had died, but twelve since the cruel news had reached her, and now, at this moment of all others, she was so absorbed in her love that no other feeling could enter her heart.
 
She looked down at her dress. Its half-mourning still betokened25 that she had lost one who was very dear to her, but the black and white was a mockery. She remembered in a flash the stunning26 grief which Alec's letter had brought her. It seemed at first that there must be a mistake and that her tears were but part of a hateful dream. It was too monstrously27 unjust that the fates should have hit upon George. She had already suffered too much. And George was so young. It was very hard that a mere28 boy should be robbed of the precious jewel which is life. And when she realised that it was really true, her grief knew no bounds. All that she had hoped was come to nought29, and now she could only despair. She bitterly regretted that she had ever allowed the boy to go on that fatal expedition, and she blamed herself because it was she who had arranged it. He must have died accusing her of his death. Her father was dead, and George was dead, and she was alone. Now she had only Alec; and then, like some poor stricken beast, her heart went out to him, crying for love, crying for protection. All her strength, the strength on which she had prided herself, was gone; and she felt utterly30 weak and utterly helpless. And her heart yearned31 for Alec, and the love which had hitherto been like a strong enduring light, now was a consuming fire.
 
But Alec's words brought the recollection of George back to her reproachful heart, and she saw the boy as she was always pleased to remember him, in his flannels32, the open shirt displaying his fine white neck, with the Panama hat that suited him so well; and she saw again his pleasant blue eyes and his engaging smile. He was a picture of honest English manhood. There was a sob33 in her throat, and her voice trembled when she spoke.
 
'I told you that if he died a brave man's death I could ask no more.'
 
She spoke in so low a tone that Alec could scarcely hear, but his pulse throbbed34 with pride at her courage. She went on, almost in a whisper.
 
'I suppose it was predestined that our family should come to an end in this way. I'm thankful that George so died that his ancestors need have felt no shame for him.'
 
'You are very brave.'
 
She shook her head slowly.
 
'No, it's not courage; it's despair. Sometimes, when I think what his father was, I'm thankful that George is dead. For at least his end was heroic. He died in a noble cause, in the performance of his duty. Life would have been too hard for him to allow me to regret his end.'
 
Alec watched her. He foresaw the words that she would say, and he waited for them.
 
'I want to thank you for all you did for him,' she said, steadying her voice.
 
'You need not do that,' he answered, gravely.
 
She was silent for a moment. Then she raised her eyes and looked at him steadily35. Her voice now had regained36 its usual calmness.
 
'I want you to tell me that he did all I could have wished him to do.'
 
To Alec it seemed that she must notice the delay of his answer. He had not expected that the question would be put to him so abruptly37. He had no moral scruples38 about telling a deliberate lie, but it affected him with a physical distaste. It sickened him like nauseous water.
 
'Yes, I think he did.'
 
'It's my only consolation39 that in the short time there was given to him, he did nothing that was small or mean, and that in everything he was honourable40, upright, and just dealing41.'
 
'Yes, he was all that.'
 
'And in his death?'
 
It seemed to Alec that something caught at his throat. The ordeal42 was more terrible than he expected.
 
'In his death he was without fear.'
 
Lucy drew a deep breath of relief.
 
'Oh, thank God! Thank God! You don't know how much it means to me to hear all that from your own lips. I feel that in a manner his courage, above all his death, have redeemed43 my father's fault. It shows that we're not rotten to the core, and it gives me back my self-respect. I feel I can look the world in the face once more. I'm infinitely44 grateful to George. He's repaid me ten thousand times for all my love, and my care, and my anxiety.'
 
'I'm very glad that it is not only grief I have brought you. I was afraid you would hate me.'
 
Lucy blushed, and there was a new light in her eyes. It seemed that on a sudden she had cast away the load of her unhappiness.
 
'No, I could never do that.'
 
At that moment they heard the sound of a carriage stopping at the door.
 
'There's Aunt Alice,' said Lucy. 'She's been lunching out.'
 
'Then let me go,' said Alec. 'You must forgive me, but I feel that I want to see no one else to-day.'
 
He rose, and she gave him her hand. He held it firmly.
 
'You haven't changed?'
 
'Don't,' she cried.
 
She looked away, for once more the tears were coming to her eyes. She tried to laugh.
 
'I'm frightfully weak and emotional now. You'll utterly despise me.'
 
'I want to see you again very soon,' he said.
 
The words of Ruth came to her mind: Why have I found grace in thine eyes, that thou shouldst take knowledge of me, and her heart was very full. She smiled in her old charming way.
 
When he was gone she drew a long breath. It seemed that a new joy was come into her life, and on a sudden she felt a keen pleasure in all the beauty of the world. She turned to the great bowl of flowers which stood on a table by the chair in which she had been sitting, and burying her face in them, voluptuously45 inhaled46 their fragrance47. She knew that he loved her still.

点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 pall hvwyP     
v.覆盖,使平淡无味;n.柩衣,棺罩;棺材;帷幕
参考例句:
  • Already the allure of meals in restaurants had begun to pall.饭店里的饭菜已经不像以前那样诱人。
  • I find his books begin to pall on me after a while.我发觉他的书读过一阵子就开始对我失去吸引力。
2 opulence N0TyJ     
n.财富,富裕
参考例句:
  • His eyes had never beheld such opulence.他从未见过这样的财富。
  • He owes his opulence to work hard.他的财富乃辛勤工作得来。
3 civilisation civilisation     
n.文明,文化,开化,教化
参考例句:
  • Energy and ideas are the twin bases of our civilisation.能源和思想是我们文明的两大基石。
  • This opera is one of the cultural totems of Western civilisation.这部歌剧是西方文明的文化标志物之一。
4 brutal bSFyb     
adj.残忍的,野蛮的,不讲理的
参考例句:
  • She has to face the brutal reality.她不得不去面对冷酷的现实。
  • They're brutal people behind their civilised veneer.他们表面上温文有礼,骨子里却是野蛮残忍。
5 brutality MSbyb     
n.野蛮的行为,残忍,野蛮
参考例句:
  • The brutality of the crime has appalled the public. 罪行之残暴使公众大为震惊。
  • a general who was infamous for his brutality 因残忍而恶名昭彰的将军
6 wilderness SgrwS     
n.杳无人烟的一片陆地、水等,荒漠
参考例句:
  • She drove the herd of cattle through the wilderness.她赶着牛群穿过荒野。
  • Education in the wilderness is not a matter of monetary means.荒凉地区的教育不是钱财问题。
7 favourable favourable     
adj.赞成的,称赞的,有利的,良好的,顺利的
参考例句:
  • The company will lend you money on very favourable terms.这家公司将以非常优惠的条件借钱给你。
  • We found that most people are favourable to the idea.我们发现大多数人同意这个意见。
8 extraordinarily Vlwxw     
adv.格外地;极端地
参考例句:
  • She is an extraordinarily beautiful girl.她是个美丽非凡的姑娘。
  • The sea was extraordinarily calm that morning.那天清晨,大海出奇地宁静。
9 faltered d034d50ce5a8004ff403ab402f79ec8d     
(嗓音)颤抖( falter的过去式和过去分词 ); 支吾其词; 蹒跚; 摇晃
参考例句:
  • He faltered out a few words. 他支吾地说出了几句。
  • "Er - but he has such a longhead!" the man faltered. 他不好意思似的嚅嗫着:“这孩子脑袋真长。”
10 distress 3llzX     
n.苦恼,痛苦,不舒适;不幸;vt.使悲痛
参考例句:
  • Nothing could alleviate his distress.什么都不能减轻他的痛苦。
  • Please don't distress yourself.请你不要忧愁了。
11 dread Ekpz8     
vt.担忧,忧虑;惧怕,不敢;n.担忧,畏惧
参考例句:
  • We all dread to think what will happen if the company closes.我们都不敢去想一旦公司关门我们该怎么办。
  • Her heart was relieved of its blankest dread.她极度恐惧的心理消除了。
12 droop p8Zyd     
v.低垂,下垂;凋萎,萎靡
参考例句:
  • The heavy snow made the branches droop.大雪使树枝垂下来。
  • Don't let your spirits droop.不要萎靡不振。
13 ravages 5d742bcf18f0fd7c4bc295e4f8d458d8     
劫掠后的残迹,破坏的结果,毁坏后的残迹
参考例句:
  • the ravages of war 战争造成的灾难
  • It is hard for anyone to escape from the ravages of time. 任何人都很难逃避时间的摧残。
14 prominence a0Mzw     
n.突出;显著;杰出;重要
参考例句:
  • He came to prominence during the World Cup in Italy.他在意大利的世界杯赛中声名鹊起。
  • This young fashion designer is rising to prominence.这位年轻的时装设计师的声望越来越高。
15 strenuous 8GvzN     
adj.奋发的,使劲的;紧张的;热烈的,狂热的
参考例句:
  • He made strenuous efforts to improve his reading. 他奋发努力提高阅读能力。
  • You may run yourself down in this strenuous week.你可能会在这紧张的一周透支掉自己。
16 blurred blurred     
v.(使)变模糊( blur的过去式和过去分词 );(使)难以区分;模模糊糊;迷离
参考例句:
  • She suffered from dizziness and blurred vision. 她饱受头晕目眩之苦。
  • Their lazy, blurred voices fell pleasantly on his ears. 他们那种慢吞吞、含糊不清的声音在他听起来却很悦耳。 来自《简明英汉词典》
17 vehement EL4zy     
adj.感情强烈的;热烈的;(人)有强烈感情的
参考例句:
  • She made a vehement attack on the government's policies.她强烈谴责政府的政策。
  • His proposal met with vehement opposition.他的倡导遭到了激烈的反对。
18 friendliness nsHz8c     
n.友谊,亲切,亲密
参考例句:
  • Behind the mask of friendliness,I know he really dislikes me.在友善的面具后面,我知道他其实并不喜欢我。
  • His manner was a blend of friendliness and respect.他的态度友善且毕恭毕敬。
19 affected TzUzg0     
adj.不自然的,假装的
参考例句:
  • She showed an affected interest in our subject.她假装对我们的课题感到兴趣。
  • His manners are affected.他的态度不自然。
20 braced 4e05e688cf12c64dbb7ab31b49f741c5     
adj.拉牢的v.支住( brace的过去式和过去分词 );撑牢;使自己站稳;振作起来
参考例句:
  • They braced up the old house with balks of timber. 他们用梁木加固旧房子。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • The house has a wooden frame which is braced with brick. 这幢房子是木结构的砖瓦房。 来自《简明英汉词典》
21 wail XMhzs     
vt./vi.大声哀号,恸哭;呼啸,尖啸
参考例句:
  • Somewhere in the audience an old woman's voice began plaintive wail.观众席里,一位老太太伤心地哭起来。
  • One of the small children began to wail with terror.小孩中的一个吓得大哭起来。
22 agitation TN0zi     
n.搅动;搅拌;鼓动,煽动
参考例句:
  • Small shopkeepers carried on a long agitation against the big department stores.小店主们长期以来一直在煽动人们反对大型百货商店。
  • These materials require constant agitation to keep them in suspension.这些药剂要经常搅动以保持悬浮状态。
23 spoke XryyC     
n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说
参考例句:
  • They sourced the spoke nuts from our company.他们的轮辐螺帽是从我们公司获得的。
  • The spokes of a wheel are the bars that connect the outer ring to the centre.辐条是轮子上连接外圈与中心的条棒。
24 gasp UfxzL     
n.喘息,气喘;v.喘息;气吁吁他说
参考例句:
  • She gave a gasp of surprise.她吃惊得大口喘气。
  • The enemy are at their last gasp.敌人在做垂死的挣扎。
25 betokened 375655c690bd96db4a8d7f827433e1e3     
v.预示,表示( betoken的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • Nothing betokened that the man know anything of what had occurred. 显然那个人还不知道已经发生了什么事。 来自互联网
  • He addressed a few angry words to her that betokened hostility. 他对她说了几句预示敌意的愤怒的话。 来自互联网
26 stunning NhGzDh     
adj.极好的;使人晕倒的
参考例句:
  • His plays are distinguished only by their stunning mediocrity.他的戏剧与众不同之处就是平凡得出奇。
  • The finished effect was absolutely stunning.完工后的效果非常美。
27 monstrously ef58bb5e1444fec1b23eef5db7b0ea4f     
参考例句:
  • There is a class of men in Bristol monstrously prejudiced against Blandly. 布里斯托尔有那么一帮人为此恨透了布兰德利。
  • You are monstrously audacious, how dare you misappropriate public funds? 你真是狗胆包天,公家的钱也敢挪用?
28 mere rC1xE     
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过
参考例句:
  • That is a mere repetition of what you said before.那不过是重复了你以前讲的话。
  • It's a mere waste of time waiting any longer.再等下去纯粹是浪费时间。
29 nought gHGx3     
n./adj.无,零
参考例句:
  • We must bring their schemes to nought.我们必须使他们的阴谋彻底破产。
  • One minus one leaves nought.一减一等于零。
30 utterly ZfpzM1     
adv.完全地,绝对地
参考例句:
  • Utterly devoted to the people,he gave his life in saving his patients.他忠于人民,把毕生精力用于挽救患者的生命。
  • I was utterly ravished by the way she smiled.她的微笑使我完全陶醉了。
31 yearned df1a28ecd1f3c590db24d0d80c264305     
渴望,切盼,向往( yearn的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • The people yearned for peace. 人民渴望和平。
  • She yearned to go back to the south. 她渴望回到南方去。
32 flannels 451bed577a1ce450abe2222e802cd201     
法兰绒男裤; 法兰绒( flannel的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • Erik had been seen in flannels and an imitation Panama hat. 人们看到埃里克身穿法兰绒裤,头戴仿制巴拿马草帽。
  • He is wearing flannels and a blue jacket. 他穿着一条法兰绒裤子和一件蓝夹克。
33 sob HwMwx     
n.空间轨道的轰炸机;呜咽,哭泣
参考例句:
  • The child started to sob when he couldn't find his mother.孩子因找不到他妈妈哭了起来。
  • The girl didn't answer,but continued to sob with her head on the table.那个女孩不回答,也不抬起头来。她只顾低声哭着。
34 throbbed 14605449969d973d4b21b9356ce6b3ec     
抽痛( throb的过去式和过去分词 ); (心脏、脉搏等)跳动
参考例句:
  • His head throbbed painfully. 他的头一抽一跳地痛。
  • The pulse throbbed steadily. 脉搏跳得平稳。
35 steadily Qukw6     
adv.稳定地;不变地;持续地
参考例句:
  • The scope of man's use of natural resources will steadily grow.人类利用自然资源的广度将日益扩大。
  • Our educational reform was steadily led onto the correct path.我们的教学改革慢慢上轨道了。
36 regained 51ada49e953b830c8bd8fddd6bcd03aa     
复得( regain的过去式和过去分词 ); 赢回; 重回; 复至某地
参考例句:
  • The majority of the people in the world have regained their liberty. 世界上大多数人已重获自由。
  • She hesitated briefly but quickly regained her poise. 她犹豫片刻,但很快恢复了镇静。
37 abruptly iINyJ     
adv.突然地,出其不意地
参考例句:
  • He gestured abruptly for Virginia to get in the car.他粗鲁地示意弗吉尼亚上车。
  • I was abruptly notified that a half-hour speech was expected of me.我突然被通知要讲半个小时的话。
38 scruples 14d2b6347f5953bad0a0c5eebf78068a     
n.良心上的不安( scruple的名词复数 );顾虑,顾忌v.感到于心不安,有顾忌( scruple的第三人称单数 )
参考例句:
  • I overcame my moral scruples. 我抛开了道德方面的顾虑。
  • I'm not ashamed of my scruples about your family. They were natural. 我并未因为对你家人的顾虑而感到羞耻。这种感觉是自然而然的。 来自疯狂英语突破英语语调
39 consolation WpbzC     
n.安慰,慰问
参考例句:
  • The children were a great consolation to me at that time.那时孩子们成了我的莫大安慰。
  • This news was of little consolation to us.这个消息对我们来说没有什么安慰。
40 honourable honourable     
adj.可敬的;荣誉的,光荣的
参考例句:
  • I don't think I am worthy of such an honourable title.这样的光荣称号,我可担当不起。
  • I hope to find an honourable way of settling difficulties.我希望设法找到一个体面的办法以摆脱困境。
41 dealing NvjzWP     
n.经商方法,待人态度
参考例句:
  • This store has an excellent reputation for fair dealing.该商店因买卖公道而享有极高的声誉。
  • His fair dealing earned our confidence.他的诚实的行为获得我们的信任。
42 ordeal B4Pzs     
n.苦难经历,(尤指对品格、耐力的)严峻考验
参考例句:
  • She managed to keep her sanity throughout the ordeal.在那场磨难中她始终保持神志正常。
  • Being lost in the wilderness for a week was an ordeal for me.在荒野里迷路一星期对我来说真是一场磨难。
43 redeemed redeemed     
adj. 可赎回的,可救赎的 动词redeem的过去式和过去分词形式
参考例句:
  • She has redeemed her pawned jewellery. 她赎回了当掉的珠宝。
  • He redeemed his watch from the pawnbroker's. 他从当铺赎回手表。
44 infinitely 0qhz2I     
adv.无限地,无穷地
参考例句:
  • There is an infinitely bright future ahead of us.我们有无限光明的前途。
  • The universe is infinitely large.宇宙是无限大的。
45 voluptuously 9d8707a795eba47d6e0717170828f787     
adv.风骚地,体态丰满地
参考例句:
  • He sniffed the perfume voluptuously. 他纵情地闻着香水的味道。 来自互联网
46 inhaled 1072d9232d676d367b2f48410158ae32     
v.吸入( inhale的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. 她合上双眼,深深吸了一口气。
  • Janet inhaled sharply when she saw him. 珍妮特看到他时猛地吸了口气。 来自《简明英汉词典》
47 fragrance 66ryn     
n.芬芳,香味,香气
参考例句:
  • The apple blossoms filled the air with their fragrance.苹果花使空气充满香味。
  • The fragrance of lavender filled the room.房间里充满了薰衣草的香味。


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