"This cannot go on," said Johnson, striving to speak calmly; "you must see for yourself--this cannot go on."
The girl, seated in a chair beyond the circle of light thrown by the reading-lamp, said nothing. With clasped hands and head raised, like a serpent's crest8, she watched her guardian striding to and fro, vainly trying to moderate his anger. So had she seen countrymen of her own fighting the primeval elements of man. Religion, civilization, the restraint learned by experience, all were gone: and Johnson had got down to the rock-bed of his character, there to find that the centre of his being, like that of the earth, was raging fire. Tormented9 by the seven devils of rejected love, he hardly noticed that the girl made no comment upon his despairing outcry.
"That you, a baptized Christian10, should leave the temple of God to dally11 with a profane12 Belial!" he raged. "Are you not ashamed to have converse13 with such an one? Finland is a mocker, a deceiver, a lover of strong drink; yet you dare trust yourself with him. Bithiah you are named; would that I could call you Candace."
Tera drew her well-marked brows together. "I have done no wrong," she said bravely; "lies are told of Jack14: lies which I do not believe. He is tall and beautiful and good. I love him!"
Johnson looked as though he could have struck her; and only remembrance of his calling prevented his seizing her with a rough grasp. However, he restrained himself, beat down his anger, and spoke15 on.
"Bithiah!" said he, in a quiet voice, "you deceive yourself in this. You are attracted only by the appearance of this man, and you do not see how bad, how cruel he is. I should be false to my trust did I permit you to become his wife. As your guardian, I have power from your father, and that power shall be exercised for your good. I forbid you to see Finland again."
"No!" said Tera, and set her mouth firmly.
"You defy me?"
"Yes!"
"Then I shall have nothing more to do with you. You shall go back to Koiau with Brand." He hesitated. "It will be a happy day for me when I see the last of you," he added abruptly16.
Tera said nothing, but looking on his white face, smiled with a little ripple17 of laughter. The man's chest rose and fell with his panting: for the hint that she knew all, and scorned all, touched him nearly. Drawn18 as by cords, he stumbled across the room, every fibre of his being slack and weak.
"Tera," he muttered faintly, "dear, I love you."
"I am sorry! I cannot----"
"Wait! wait!" Johnson lightly touched her arm with his hot hand. "Do not speak. Hear me! I love you! I have always loved you: I always shall. I brought you here in the hope that you would learn to love me. My passion is stronger than my life! Many waters cannot quench19 it. Dear, I am but a man as other men. For months I have fought against this love, but in vain. Give me your heart; marry me. We will return to your island; we will bring your countrymen into the fold of the Good Shepherd. Let me comfort you, guide you, lead you as my earthly bride to the foot of the Cross. See! See! I am no stern guardian, no minister of the Gospel, but a man--a man whose life lies in your hand."
"No!" said Tera, firmly, although his passion made her pity him; "my heart is not my own to give. You are a good man, but--Jack!"
"You--you love him then?"
"With all my soul!"
Johnson gave an hysterical20 sob21. "'And this also is a sore evil,'" he quoted under his breath, "'that in all points as he came, so shall he go.'"
"May I leave the room?"
"Woman," he seized her wrist, "you shall love me!"
"No!"
"You are a snare--a sorceress; you have beguiled22 my soul to its undoing23! I was happy once; I walked in pleasant ways, but you have turned aside my feet to iniquity24. God help me! How can I preach His Word with this raging fire in my breast! You shall love me! I forbid you to think of Finland. You are mine--mine--mine!"
With a dexterous25 twist Tera released her hand and flew out of the room, closing the door behind her. Johnson started in headlong pursuit, but stumbling blindly against the door, struck his forehead on the panels, and fell half stunned26 on the floor. There he lay and moaned, with his head spinning like a teetotum, until the sound of approaching steps made him rise and get into the desk chair. Then his mother, a commonplace type of her sex, much occupied with domestic affairs, entered to say that supper was ready.
"I don't want supper to-night, thank you, mother," said the minister, keeping his face turned away that she might not see the swelling27 on his forehead; "have it yourself, and go to bed."
"I can't find Bithiah, my son."
"Ah!" the old woman wagged her head like a mandarin29, "she is no doubt meditating30 on the beautiful discourse31 of Brother Korah."
"No doubt, mother. Please go away; I am busy."
"I am not hungry."
"I want you to say grace."
Johnson laughed bitterly. "I am not in the mood to say grace, mother."
The old lady, who was somewhat querulous, lifted up her voice in reproof33 of his irreligious speech; but Johnson cut her short, and persuaded her to leave the room. Then he looked the door and threw himself into his chair with a groan34.
"I am only a man--a man. It is past all bearing. Oh, what a life--what a life! No money, no love--and a faith that fails me at need. Yet I was wrong to lose my temper. 'A fool's wrath35 is presently known; but a prudent36 man covereth shame.'"
The minister was shaking as a blown reed, and his nerves racked him with pain. There was a French window opening on to a plot of grass, and this he flung wide to the night air. But the calm failed to soothe37 him, although he walked rapidly up and down the sward trying to forget the girl. He had done all he could; he could do no more. "Bithiah! Tera!" he cried. Then he was silent. He re-entered the room, and sat down resolutely38 at his desk. "I must try and forget her," said he. "Work! work! Anything to distract my mind."
From a drawer he took a number of bills, and with these, many unpleasant letters insisting upon payment. They were evidence of his youthful folly39 at college, before he had been called to grace--five hundred pounds of disgrace and self-indulgence which had hung round his neck these many years. Some he had paid, but many remained unsettled. During his two years' absence in the South Seas, these records of sin--as he regarded them--had never troubled him; but since his return to Grimleigh his creditors40 had found him out, and were persecuting41 him daily. He was threatened with imprisonment42, with bankruptcy43, and public shame--he, a minister of the Gospel. If the truth became known he would lose his position; he would be cast without employment on the world. Yet how to conceal44 his difficulties he did not know. Five hundred pounds he owed, and his stipend45 was two hundred a year.
"If the pearls were only mine!" he murmured.
With a sigh he took from another drawer a bag of chamois leather, tied at the neck with red tape. Opening this, he shook out on the blotting-pad a number of smooth shining pearls, some large, some small, all of rare colouring and great value. These belonged to Tera. They had been given to her by Buli before she left Koiau, for the purpose of buying goods and clothes to take back when she returned. Tera, as yet, had not sold them, and for safe keeping had given them to her guardian. But the time was at hand when she would go back to Koiau with Brand; and this treasure would be turned into money, and exchanged for value, in accordance with her father's wish.
"Three thousand pounds' worth!" said Johnson, handling the glistening46 gems47, "and if Bithiah married me the money would be mine. But God knows I do not care for these things, tempting48 as they are. It is she alone whom I desire for my wife, though to gain her I risk the pearl of great price. For a man's soul is as a pearl, and she with her beauty would thieve----"
He stopped suddenly, for it seemed to him that he heard a soft and stealthy footstep outside. Cowardice49 formed no part of the young man's character, and hastily replacing the pearls in the bag, and the bag in the drawer, he crossed the room and stepped out of the window. To right and left of him he looked, but saw nothing. Overhead shone the quiet stars; underfoot he trod the dewy sward; but there was no sign of any human being. Yet Johnson felt convinced that some eye had been on him whilst he counted the pearls, and he felt glad that he had locked the drawer which contained them. To verify his suspicions, he stepped through the iron gate, and walked some way up the street. All was silent under the glimmer50 of the gas-lamps, and he could hear only the echo of his own steps, hollow on the asphalt pavement. With a sigh of relief, half convinced that his ears had played him false, he returned to the house and his study. There was no doubt that some one had been at the desk during his ten minutes' absence. The bills were gone!
The bills were gone! His secret was in the keeping of some other person. Who had done this? Why had he been watched? Why had the bills, of all things, been taken by this unknown thief? The minister ran wildly out again into the darkness; he hunted up and down the street; he looked over his neighbours' fences; but in spite of the closest search he could find neither the bills nor the person who had taken them. The door leading from the study to the interior of the house was locked--no one could have entered in that way. No member of his own household could have stolen them. No! the thief must have come in by the window during his absence. But why had the miscreant51 taken the bills and not the pearls? An examination assured him that these were safe. But the list of his debts, his name, his honour, were in the hands of some person unknown.
There was nothing to be done. The strictest search had failed to find the thief, and he did not dare to summon assistance lest his dishonour53 might become the sooner known. With a prayer for help on his lips, he locked the window. Perplexed54 and anxious, he retired to rest--but not to his room. Fearful lest the thief should return, he lay down on the sofa. In vain were all efforts to sleep, and he passed the night in agony, until dawn burned redly along the ocean line. Then he rose to play his part of the godly young minister of the Grimleigh Bethesda.
With the passing of the night went a portion of Johnson's terrors; and he was fairly composed when he met Tera at the breakfast-table. Beyond a conventional greeting he said nothing; but during the absence of his mother from the room, he raised his eyes to bespeak55 the girl's attention.
"I beg your pardon for speaking as I did last night," he said coldly; "I lost control of myself."
"Say nothing more, Mr. Johnson," cried Tera; "I understand."
"You do not understand anything, Bithiah. To-day I write to Brother Korah, asking him to see me to-morrow morning at ten. You will please be present, as I wish to give into his charge you and your pearls."
"Aué! You cast me off?"
"I can no longer be responsible for you or for myself. I love you, but your heart belongs to this worldly Finland. I shall tell all to Brother Korah, and he shall take you back at once to Koiau."
"You shall never see him again," said Johnson, fiercely; "in your own despite you shall be saved from that infidel."
"Dog in the manger!" said she, insultingly. "I am not to see Jack, because I refuse to love you. Well! we shall see if a chief's daughter is to be your slave. Tofa alii" [farewell, chief], and with a haughty58 air she walked out of the room.
It might have been that Johnson would have followed, to explain his meaning more clearly, and even to defend his conduct so far as was possible, had not his mother returned just at that moment. She at once engaged him in a conversation touching59 the delinquencies of their maid-of-all-work, a mulish creature who was one of that great army of cooks sent by the devil for the spoliation of God's food.
The man, intent on his own thoughts, listened mechanically, and seized the first opportunity to get away. That same morning he wrote a note, asking Brand, the missionary60, to call and see him about Tera; and so, with iron determination, committed himself to a separation.
All that day Tera pointedly61 avoided his company, and when, as at meal-times, she was forced to be in it, was content to express herself in monosyllables. Johnson winced and paled at the scorn which her attitude implied, but bore with it as best he could. Yet his thoughts were not exclusively taken up with her. He was constantly conjecturing62 as to who could have stolen his bills, and he tortured himself with fears lest his shame would speedily be made known in Grimleigh. The strictest examination had revealed no trace of the thief. He could not imagine how the creature had accomplished63 his end so dexterously64. He was silent and unhappy.
The year was drawing to harvest-time, and the golden sunlight lay heavy on the yellow corn lands. In the almost tropical heat, Johnson panted and quivered, for his jaded65 nerves and ill-nourished body could not resist the power of the sun. Towards five o'clock, when the heat had somewhat abated66, and the cool sea-breeze breathed across the glowing earth, he went into the town to see some members of his congregation. His work, he sternly resolved, should not be neglected for his private troubles; so he visited the sick, succoured the needy67, and returned somewhat calm to his home. As he entered, Mrs. Johnson, querulous as ever, met him.
"Where is Bithiah, my son?" she asked, complainingly. "I want Bithiah to help me prepare the supper; Jane is worse than useless."
"I have not seen Bithiah, mother."
"She went out an hour ago, George, and it is growing dark. This is not the time for a modest maiden68 to be out. And Jane worries me. She has used up all the milk, and has forgotten to order the meat. Do look for Bithiah."
"Very well, mother. I expect she is taking her favourite walk by Farmer Carwell's meadows. I must just see if there are any letters for me in the study."
There was ample light in the room when he entered, for the curtains were drawn back from the open window. He approached the desk in an absent frame of mind, but suddenly his attention was fixed69 by an amazing circumstance. On the blotting-paper lay the pile of bills which had been stolen from him on the previous night. Again during his absence the thief had evidently entered. The plunder70 was restored. The minister shook, and the perspiration71 beaded his brow. Then he noticed that his keys, which he had left behind, dangled72 from the drawer which had contained the pearls.
"Gone!" he cried wildly. "The pearls are gone!" For a moment he stood still, looking at the returned bills--the empty drawer. Then, in a frenzy of fear, he rushed from the house.
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1
guardian
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| n.监护人；守卫者，保护者 | |
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frenzy
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| n.疯狂，狂热，极度的激动 | |
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awe
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| n.敬畏，惊惧；vt.使敬畏，使惊惧 | |
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avalanche
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| n.雪崩，大量涌来 | |
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avert
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| v.防止，避免；转移(目光、注意力等) | |
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wrought
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| v.引起；以…原料制作；运转；adj.制造的 | |
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beckoned
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| v.（用头或手的动作）示意，召唤( beckon的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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crest
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| n.顶点；饰章；羽冠；vt.达到顶点；vi.形成浪尖 | |
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tormented
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| 饱受折磨的 | |
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Christian
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| adj.基督教徒的；n.基督教徒 | |
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dally
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| v.荒废(时日)，调情 | |
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profane
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| adj.亵神的，亵渎的；vt.亵渎，玷污 | |
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converse
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| vi.谈话，谈天，闲聊；adv.相反的，相反 | |
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14
jack
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| n.插座，千斤顶，男人；v.抬起，提醒，扛举；n.（Jake）杰克 | |
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15
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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ripple
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| n.涟波，涟漪，波纹，粗钢梳；vt.使...起涟漪，使起波纹； vi.呈波浪状，起伏前进 | |
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drawn
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| v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的 | |
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quench
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| vt.熄灭，扑灭；压制 | |
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hysterical
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| adj.情绪异常激动的，歇斯底里般的 | |
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sob
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| n.空间轨道的轰炸机；呜咽，哭泣 | |
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beguiled
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| v.欺骗( beguile的过去式和过去分词 )；使陶醉；使高兴；消磨（时间等） | |
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undoing
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| n.毁灭的原因，祸根；破坏，毁灭 | |
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iniquity
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| n.邪恶；不公正 | |
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dexterous
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| adj.灵敏的；灵巧的 | |
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stunned
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| adj. 震惊的，惊讶的 动词stun的过去式和过去分词 | |
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swelling
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| n.肿胀 | |
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retired
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| adj.隐退的，退休的，退役的 | |
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Mandarin
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| n.中国官话，国语，满清官吏；adj.华丽辞藻的 | |
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meditating
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| a.沉思的，冥想的 | |
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discourse
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| n.论文，演说；谈话；话语；vi.讲述，著述 | |
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32
pickles
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| n.腌菜( pickle的名词复数 )；处于困境；遇到麻烦；菜酱 | |
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reproof
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| n.斥责，责备 | |
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groan
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| vi./n.呻吟，抱怨；(发出)呻吟般的声音 | |
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wrath
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| n.愤怒，愤慨，暴怒 | |
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prudent
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| adj.谨慎的，有远见的，精打细算的 | |
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soothe
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| v.安慰；使平静；使减轻；缓和；奉承 | |
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resolutely
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| adj.坚决地，果断地 | |
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folly
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| n.愚笨，愚蠢，蠢事，蠢行，傻话 | |
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creditors
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| n.债权人，债主( creditor的名词复数 ) | |
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persecuting
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| （尤指宗教或政治信仰的）迫害(~sb. for sth.)( persecute的现在分词 )； 烦扰，困扰或骚扰某人 | |
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imprisonment
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| n.关押，监禁，坐牢 | |
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bankruptcy
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| n.破产；无偿付能力 | |
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conceal
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| v.隐藏，隐瞒，隐蔽 | |
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stipend
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| n.薪贴；奖学金；养老金 | |
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glistening
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| adj.闪耀的，反光的v.湿物闪耀，闪亮( glisten的现在分词 ) | |
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47
gems
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| growth； economy； management； and customer satisfaction 增长 | |
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tempting
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| a.诱人的, 吸引人的 | |
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cowardice
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| n.胆小，怯懦 | |
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50
glimmer
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| v.发出闪烁的微光；n.微光，微弱的闪光 | |
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51
miscreant
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| n.恶棍 | |
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52
gasped
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| v.喘气( gasp的过去式和过去分词 )；喘息；倒抽气；很想要 | |
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53
dishonour
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| n./vt.拒付（支票、汇票、票据等）；vt.凌辱，使丢脸；n.不名誉，耻辱，不光彩 | |
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54
perplexed
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| adj.不知所措的 | |
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bespeak
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| v.预定；预先请求 | |
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56
faltered
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| （嗓音）颤抖( falter的过去式和过去分词 )； 支吾其词； 蹒跚； 摇晃 | |
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winced
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| 赶紧避开，畏缩( wince的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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haughty
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| adj.傲慢的，高傲的 | |
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touching
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| adj.动人的，使人感伤的 | |
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missionary
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| adj.教会的，传教(士)的；n.传教士 | |
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pointedly
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| adv.尖地，明显地 | |
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62
conjecturing
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| v. & n. 推测，臆测 | |
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63
accomplished
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| adj.有才艺的；有造诣的；达到了的 | |
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64
dexterously
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| adv.巧妙地，敏捷地 | |
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65
jaded
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| adj.精疲力竭的；厌倦的；（因过饱或过多而）腻烦的；迟钝的 | |
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66
abated
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| 减少( abate的过去式和过去分词 )； 减去； 降价； 撤消（诉讼） | |
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needy
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| adj.贫穷的，贫困的，生活艰苦的 | |
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68
maiden
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| n.少女，处女；adj.未婚的，纯洁的，无经验的 | |
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fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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70
plunder
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| vt.劫掠财物，掠夺；n.劫掠物，赃物；劫掠 | |
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71
perspiration
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| n.汗水；出汗 | |
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72
dangled
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| 悬吊着( dangle的过去式和过去分词 )； 摆动不定； 用某事物诱惑…； 吊胃口 | |
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