“Anything wrong, Thompson?” he asked.
“There was," was the answer, positive and complete.
Forrest closed the door and went on along a passage that was like a tunnel. Narrow, iron-barred openings, like the slits8 for archers9 in medieval castles, dimly lighted the way. Another door gave access to a long, low room, beam-ceilinged, with a fireplace in which an ox could have been roasted. A huge stump10, resting on a bed of coals, blazed brightly. Two billiard tables, several card tables, lounging corners, and a miniature bar constituted the major furnishing. Two young men chalked their cues and returned Forrest’s greeting.
Naismith, a youngish man of thirty, with glasses, smiled sheepishly and cocked his head at his companion.
“Wainwright challenged me,” he explained.
Young Wainwright bristled13 to acceptance of the challenge, but before he could utter the retort on his lips his host was moving on and addressing Naismith over his shoulder.
“Do you want to come along at eleven:thirty? Thayer and I are running out in the machine to look over the Shropshires. He wants about ten carloads of rams14. You ought to find good stuff in this matter of Idaho shipments. Bring your camera along.—Seen Thayer this morning?”
“Just came in to breakfast as we were leaving,” Bert Wainwright volunteered.
“Tell him to be ready at eleven-thirty if you see him. You’re not invited, Bert... out of kindness. The girls are sure to be up then.”
“Take Rita along with you anyway,” Bert pleaded.
“No fear,” was Forrest’s reply from the door. “We’re on business. Besides, you can’t pry15 Rita from Ernestine with block-and-tackle.”
“That’s why I wanted to see if you could,” Bert grinned.
“Funny how fellows never appreciate their own sisters.” Forrest paused for a perceptible moment. “I always thought Rita was a real nice sister. What’s the matter with her?”
Before a reply could reach him, he had closed the door and was jingling16 his spurs along the passage to a spiral stairway of broad concrete steps. As he left the head of the stairway, a dance-time piano measure and burst of laughter made him peep into a white morning room, flooded with sunshine. A young girl, in rose-colored kimono and boudoir cap, was at the instrument, while two others, similarly accoutered, in each other’s arms, were parodying17 a dance never learned at dancing school nor intended by the participants for male eyes to see.
The girl at the piano discovered him, winked19, and played on. Not for another minute did the dancers spy him. They gave startled cries, collapsed20, laughing, in each other’s arms, and the music stopped. They were gorgeous, healthy young creatures, the three of them, and Forrest’s eye kindled21 as he looked at them in quite the same way that it had kindled when he regarded the Fotherington Princess.
“I’ve been here five minutes,” Dick Forrest asserted.
The two dancers, to cover their confusion, doubted his veracity24 and instanced his many well-known and notorious guilts of mendacity. The girl at the piano, Ernestine, his sister-in-law, insisted that pearls of truth fell from his lips, that she had seen him from the moment he began to look, and that as she estimated the passage of time he had been looking much longer than five minutes.
“Well, anyway,” Forrest broke in on their babel, “Bert, the sweet innocent, doesn’t think you are up yet.”
“We’re not... to him,” one of the dancers, a vivacious25 young Venus, retorted. “Nor are we to you either. So run along, little boy. Run along.”
“Look here, Lute,” Forrest began sternly. “Just because I am a decrepit26 old man, and just because you are eighteen, just eighteen, and happen to be my wife’s sister, you needn’t presume to put the high and mighty27 over on me. Don’t forget—and I state the fact, disagreeable as it may be, for Rita’s sake—don’t forget that in the past ten years I’ve paddled you more disgraceful times than you care to dare me to enumerate28.
“It is true, I am not so young as I used to was, but—” He felt the biceps of his right arm and made as if to roll up the sleeve. “—But, I’m not all in yet, and for two cents...”
“What?” the young woman challenged belligerently29.
“For two cents,” he muttered darkly. “For two cents... Besides, and it grieves me to inform you, your cap is not on straight. Also, it is not a very tasteful creation at best. I could make a far more becoming cap with my toes, asleep, and... yes, seasick30 as well.”
Lute tossed her blond head defiantly31, glanced at her comrades in solicitation32 of support, and said:
“Oh, I don’t know. It seems humanly reasonable that the three of us can woman-handle a mere33 man of your elderly and insulting avoirdupois. What do you say, girls? Let’s rush him. He’s not a minute under forty, and he has an aneurism. Yes, and though loath34 to divulge35 family secrets, he’s got Meniere’s Disease.”
Ernestine, a small but robust36 blonde of eighteen, sprang from the piano and joined her two comrades in a raid on the cushions of the deep window seats. Side by side, a cushion in each hand, and with proper distance between them cannily37 established for the swinging of the cushions, they advanced upon the foe38.
He shook his head emphatically.
“Just for that, and for all the rest of your insolences, the three of you are going to get yours. All the wrongs of a lifetime are rising now in my brain in a dazzling brightness. I shall go Berserk in a moment. But first, and I speak as an agriculturist, and I address myself to you, Lute, in all humility41, in heaven’s name what is Meniere’s Disease? Do sheep catch it?”
“Meniere’s Disease is,” Lute began,... “is what you’ve got. Sheep are the only known living creatures that get it.”
Ensued red war and chaos42. Forrest made a football rush of the sort that obtained in California before the adoption43 of Rugby; and the girls broke the line to let him through, turned upon him, flanked him on either side, and pounded him with cushions.
He turned, with widespread arms, extended fingers, each finger a hook, and grappled the three. The battle became a whirlwind, a be-spurred man the center, from which radiated flying draperies of flimsy silk, disconnected slippers44, boudoir caps, and hairpins45. There were thuds from the cushions, grunts46 from the man, squeals47, yelps48 and giggles49 from the girls, and from the totality of the combat inextinguishable laughter and a ripping and tearing of fragile textures50.
Dick Forrest found himself sprawled51 on the floor, the wind half knocked out of him by shrewdly delivered cushions, his head buzzing from the buffeting52, and, in one hand, a trailing, torn, and generally disrupted girdle of pale blue silk and pink roses.
In one doorway53, cheeks flaming from the struggle, stood Rita, alert as a fawn54 and ready to flee. In the other doorway, likewise flame-checked, stood Ernestine in the commanding attitude of the Mother of the Gracchi, the wreckage55 of her kimono wrapped severely56 about her and held severely about her by her own waist-pressing arm. Lute, cornered behind the piano, attempted to run but was driven back by the menace of Forrest, who, on hands and knees, stamped loudly with the palms of his hands on the hardwood floor, rolled his head savagely58, and emitted bull-like roars.
“And they still believe that old prehistoric59 myth,” Ernestine proclaimed from safety, “that once he, that wretched semblance60 of a man-thing prone61 in the dirt, captained Berkeley to victory over Stanford.”
Her breasts heaved from the exertion62, and he marked the pulsating63 of the shimmering64 cherry-colored silk with delight as he flung his glance around to the other two girls similarly breathing.
The piano was a miniature grand—a dainty thing of rich white and gold to match the morning room. It stood out from the wall, so that there was possibility for Lute to escape around either way of it. Forrest gained his feet and faced her across the broad, flat top of the instrument. As he threatened to vault65 it, Lute cried out in horror:
“But your spurs, Dick! Your spurs!”
“Give me time to take them off,” he offered.
As he stooped to unbuckle them, Lute darted66 to escape, but was herded67 back to the shelter of the piano.
“I’ve got witnesses,” she panted, indicating with her blue joyous69 eyes the young things in the doorways70.
“Very well, my dear.” Forrest drew back his body and spread his resting palms. “I’m coming over to you.”
Action and speech were simultaneous. His body, posited71 sidewise from his hands, was vaulted72 across, the perilous73 spurs a full foot above the glossy74 white surface. And simultaneously75 Lute ducked and went under the piano on hands and knees. Her mischance lay in that she bumped her head, and, before she could recover way, Forrest had circled the piano and cornered her under it.
“Come out!” he commanded. “Come out and take your medicine!”
“A truce76,” she pleaded. “A truce, Sir Knight77, for dear love’s sake and all damsels in distress78.”
“I ain’t no knight,” Forrest announced in his deepest bass79. “I’m an ogre, a filthy80, debased and altogether unregenerate ogre. I was born in the tule-swamps. My father was an ogre and my mother was more so. I was lulled81 to slumber82 on the squalls of infants dead, foreordained, and predamned. I was nourished solely83 on the blood of maidens85 educated in Mills Seminary. My favorite chophouse has ever been a hardwood floor, a loaf of Mills Seminary maiden84, and a roof of flat piano. My father, as well as an ogre, was a California horse-thief. I am more reprehensible86 than my father. I have more teeth. My mother, as well as an ogress, was a Nevada book-canvasser. Let all her shame be told. She even solicited87 subscriptions88 for ladies’ magazines. I am more terrible than my mother. I have peddled89 safety razors.”
“Can naught90 soothe91 and charm your savage57 breast?” Lute pleaded in soulful tones while she studied her chances for escape.
“One thing only, miserable92 female. One thing only, on the earth, over the earth, and under its ruining waters—”
A squawk of recognized plagiarism93 interrupted him from Ernestine.
“See Ernest Dowson, page seventy-nine, a thin book of thin verse ladled out with porridge to young women detentioned at Mills Seminary,” Forrest went on. “As I had already enunciated94 before I was so rudely interrupted, the one thing only that can balm and embalm95 this savage breast is the ‘Maiden’s Prayer.’ Listen, with all your ears ere I chew them off in multitude and gross! Listen, silly, unbeautiful, squat6, short-legged and ugly female under the piano! Can you recite the ’Maiden’s Prayer’?”
Screams of delight from the young things in the doorways prevented the proper answer and Lute, from under the piano, cried out to young Wainwright, who had appeared:
“A rescue, Sir Knight! A rescue!”
“Unhand the maiden!” was Bert’s challenge.
“Who art thou?” Forrest demanded.
“King George, sirrah!—I mean, er, Saint George.”
“Then am I thy dragon,” Forrest announced with due humility. “Spare this ancient, honorable, and only neck I have.”
“Off with his head!” the young things encouraged.
“Stay thee, maidens, I pray thee,” Bert begged. “I am only a Small Potato. Yet am I unafraid. I shall beard the dragon. I shall beard him in his gullet, and, while he lingeringly chokes to death over my unpalatableness and general spinefulness, do you, fair damsels, flee to the mountains lest the valleys fall upon you. Yolo, Petaluma, and West Sacramento are about to be overwhelmed by a tidal wave and many big fishes.”
“Off with his head!” the young things chanted. “Slay him in his blood and barbecue him!”
“Thumbs down,” Forrest groaned96. “I am undone97. Trust to the unstrained quality of mercy possessed98 by Christian99 young women in the year 1914 who will vote some day if ever they grow up and do not marry foreigners. Consider my head off, Saint George. I am expired. Further deponent sayeth not.”
And Forrest, with sobs100 and slubberings, with realistic shudders101 and kicks and a great jingling of spurs, lay down on the floor and expired.
Lute crawled out from under the piano, and was joined by Rita and Ernestine in an extemporized102 dance of the harpies about the slain103.
In the midst of it, Forrest sat up, protesting. Also, he was guilty of a significant and privy104 wink18 to Lute.
“The hero!” he cried. “Forget him not. Crown him with flowers.”
And Bert was crowned with flowers from the vases, unchanged from the day before. When a bunch of water-logged stems of early tulips, propelled by Lute’s vigorous arm, impacted soggily on his neck under the ear, he fled. The riot of pursuit echoed along the hall and died out down the stairway toward the stag room. Forrest gathered himself together, and, grinning, went jingling on through the Big House.
He crossed two patios105 on brick walks roofed with Spanish tile and swamped with early foliage106 and blooms, and gained his wing of the house, still breathing from the fun, to find, in the office, his secretary awaiting him.
“Good morning, Mr. Blake,” he greeted. “Sorry I was delayed.” He glanced at his wrist-watch. “Only four minutes, however. I just couldn’t get away sooner.”
点击收听单词发音
1 apron | |
n.围裙;工作裙 | |
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2 starched | |
adj.浆硬的,硬挺的,拘泥刻板的v.把(衣服、床单等)浆一浆( starch的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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3 deflected | |
偏离的 | |
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4 greasy | |
adj. 多脂的,油脂的 | |
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5 overalls | |
n.(复)工装裤;长罩衣 | |
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6 squat | |
v.蹲坐,蹲下;n.蹲下;adj.矮胖的,粗矮的 | |
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7 squatted | |
v.像动物一样蹲下( squat的过去式和过去分词 );非法擅自占用(土地或房屋);为获得其所有权;而占用某片公共用地。 | |
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8 slits | |
n.狭长的口子,裂缝( slit的名词复数 )v.切开,撕开( slit的第三人称单数 );在…上开狭长口子 | |
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9 archers | |
n.弓箭手,射箭运动员( archer的名词复数 ) | |
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10 stump | |
n.残株,烟蒂,讲演台;v.砍断,蹒跚而走 | |
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11 bantered | |
v.开玩笑,说笑,逗乐( banter的过去式和过去分词 );(善意地)取笑,逗弄 | |
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12 lute | |
n.琵琶,鲁特琴 | |
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13 bristled | |
adj. 直立的,多刺毛的 动词bristle的过去式和过去分词 | |
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14 rams | |
n.公羊( ram的名词复数 );(R-)白羊(星)座;夯;攻城槌v.夯实(土等)( ram的第三人称单数 );猛撞;猛压;反复灌输 | |
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15 pry | |
vi.窥(刺)探,打听;vt.撬动(开,起) | |
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16 jingling | |
叮当声 | |
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17 parodying | |
v.滑稽地模仿,拙劣地模仿( parody的现在分词 ) | |
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18 wink | |
n.眨眼,使眼色,瞬间;v.眨眼,使眼色,闪烁 | |
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19 winked | |
v.使眼色( wink的过去式和过去分词 );递眼色(表示友好或高兴等);(指光)闪烁;闪亮 | |
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20 collapsed | |
adj.倒塌的 | |
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21 kindled | |
(使某物)燃烧,着火( kindle的过去式和过去分词 ); 激起(感情等); 发亮,放光 | |
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22 persiflage | |
n.戏弄;挖苦 | |
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23 forth | |
adv.向前;向外,往外 | |
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24 veracity | |
n.诚实 | |
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25 vivacious | |
adj.活泼的,快活的 | |
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26 decrepit | |
adj.衰老的,破旧的 | |
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27 mighty | |
adj.强有力的;巨大的 | |
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28 enumerate | |
v.列举,计算,枚举,数 | |
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29 belligerently | |
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30 seasick | |
adj.晕船的 | |
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31 defiantly | |
adv.挑战地,大胆对抗地 | |
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32 solicitation | |
n.诱惑;揽货;恳切地要求;游说 | |
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33 mere | |
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过 | |
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34 loath | |
adj.不愿意的;勉强的 | |
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35 divulge | |
v.泄漏(秘密等);宣布,公布 | |
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36 robust | |
adj.强壮的,强健的,粗野的,需要体力的,浓的 | |
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37 cannily | |
精明地 | |
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38 foe | |
n.敌人,仇敌 | |
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39 parley | |
n.谈判 | |
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40 taunted | |
嘲讽( taunt的过去式和过去分词 ); 嘲弄; 辱骂; 奚落 | |
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41 humility | |
n.谦逊,谦恭 | |
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42 chaos | |
n.混乱,无秩序 | |
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43 adoption | |
n.采用,采纳,通过;收养 | |
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44 slippers | |
n. 拖鞋 | |
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45 hairpins | |
n.发夹( hairpin的名词复数 ) | |
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46 grunts | |
(猪等)作呼噜声( grunt的第三人称单数 ); (指人)发出类似的哼声; 咕哝着说; 石鲈 | |
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47 squeals | |
n.长而尖锐的叫声( squeal的名词复数 )v.长声尖叫,用长而尖锐的声音说( squeal的第三人称单数 ) | |
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48 yelps | |
n.(因痛苦、气愤、兴奋等的)短而尖的叫声( yelp的名词复数 )v.发出短而尖的叫声( yelp的第三人称单数 ) | |
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49 giggles | |
n.咯咯的笑( giggle的名词复数 );傻笑;玩笑;the giggles 止不住的格格笑v.咯咯地笑( giggle的第三人称单数 ) | |
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50 textures | |
n.手感( texture的名词复数 );质感;口感;(音乐或文学的)谐和统一感 | |
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51 sprawled | |
v.伸开四肢坐[躺]( sprawl的过去式和过去分词);蔓延;杂乱无序地拓展;四肢伸展坐着(或躺着) | |
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52 buffeting | |
振动 | |
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53 doorway | |
n.门口,(喻)入门;门路,途径 | |
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54 fawn | |
n.未满周岁的小鹿;v.巴结,奉承 | |
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55 wreckage | |
n.(失事飞机等的)残骸,破坏,毁坏 | |
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56 severely | |
adv.严格地;严厉地;非常恶劣地 | |
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57 savage | |
adj.野蛮的;凶恶的,残暴的;n.未开化的人 | |
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58 savagely | |
adv. 野蛮地,残酷地 | |
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59 prehistoric | |
adj.(有记载的)历史以前的,史前的,古老的 | |
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60 semblance | |
n.外貌,外表 | |
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61 prone | |
adj.(to)易于…的,很可能…的;俯卧的 | |
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62 exertion | |
n.尽力,努力 | |
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63 pulsating | |
adj.搏动的,脉冲的v.有节奏地舒张及收缩( pulsate的现在分词 );跳动;脉动;受(激情)震动 | |
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64 shimmering | |
v.闪闪发光,发微光( shimmer的现在分词 ) | |
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65 vault | |
n.拱形圆顶,地窖,地下室 | |
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66 darted | |
v.投掷,投射( dart的过去式和过去分词 );向前冲,飞奔 | |
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67 herded | |
群集,纠结( herd的过去式和过去分词 ); 放牧; (使)向…移动 | |
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68 growled | |
v.(动物)发狺狺声, (雷)作隆隆声( growl的过去式和过去分词 );低声咆哮着说 | |
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69 joyous | |
adj.充满快乐的;令人高兴的 | |
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70 doorways | |
n.门口,门道( doorway的名词复数 ) | |
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71 posited | |
v.假定,设想,假设( posit的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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72 vaulted | |
adj.拱状的 | |
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73 perilous | |
adj.危险的,冒险的 | |
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74 glossy | |
adj.平滑的;有光泽的 | |
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75 simultaneously | |
adv.同时发生地,同时进行地 | |
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76 truce | |
n.休战,(争执,烦恼等的)缓和;v.以停战结束 | |
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77 knight | |
n.骑士,武士;爵士 | |
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78 distress | |
n.苦恼,痛苦,不舒适;不幸;vt.使悲痛 | |
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79 bass | |
n.男低音(歌手);低音乐器;低音大提琴 | |
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80 filthy | |
adj.卑劣的;恶劣的,肮脏的 | |
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81 lulled | |
vt.使镇静,使安静(lull的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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82 slumber | |
n.睡眠,沉睡状态 | |
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83 solely | |
adv.仅仅,唯一地 | |
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84 maiden | |
n.少女,处女;adj.未婚的,纯洁的,无经验的 | |
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85 maidens | |
处女( maiden的名词复数 ); 少女; 未婚女子; (板球运动)未得分的一轮投球 | |
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86 reprehensible | |
adj.该受责备的 | |
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87 solicited | |
v.恳求( solicit的过去式和过去分词 );(指娼妇)拉客;索求;征求 | |
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88 subscriptions | |
n.(报刊等的)订阅费( subscription的名词复数 );捐款;(俱乐部的)会员费;捐助 | |
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89 peddled | |
(沿街)叫卖( peddle的过去式和过去分词 ); 兜售; 宣传; 散播 | |
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90 naught | |
n.无,零 [=nought] | |
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91 soothe | |
v.安慰;使平静;使减轻;缓和;奉承 | |
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92 miserable | |
adj.悲惨的,痛苦的;可怜的,糟糕的 | |
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93 plagiarism | |
n.剽窃,抄袭 | |
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94 enunciated | |
v.(清晰地)发音( enunciate的过去式和过去分词 );确切地说明 | |
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95 embalm | |
v.保存(尸体)不腐 | |
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96 groaned | |
v.呻吟( groan的过去式和过去分词 );发牢骚;抱怨;受苦 | |
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97 undone | |
a.未做完的,未完成的 | |
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98 possessed | |
adj.疯狂的;拥有的,占有的 | |
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99 Christian | |
adj.基督教徒的;n.基督教徒 | |
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100 sobs | |
啜泣(声),呜咽(声)( sob的名词复数 ) | |
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101 shudders | |
n.颤动,打颤,战栗( shudder的名词复数 )v.战栗( shudder的第三人称单数 );发抖;(机器、车辆等)突然震动;颤动 | |
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102 extemporized | |
v.即兴创作,即席演奏( extemporize的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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103 slain | |
杀死,宰杀,杀戮( slay的过去分词 ); (slay的过去分词) | |
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104 privy | |
adj.私用的;隐密的 | |
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105 patios | |
n.露台,平台( patio的名词复数 ) | |
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106 foliage | |
n.叶子,树叶,簇叶 | |
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