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首页 » 经典英文小说 » The Little Minister » Chapter Nineteen. CIRCUMSTANCES LEADING TO THE FIRST SERMON IN APPROVAL OF WOMEN.
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Chapter Nineteen. CIRCUMSTANCES LEADING TO THE FIRST SERMON IN APPROVAL OF WOMEN.
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 A young man thinks that he alone of mortals is impervious1 to love, and so the discovery that he is in it suddenly alters his views of his own mechanism2. It is thus not unlike a rap on the funny-bone. Did Gavin make this discovery when the Egyptian left him? Apparently3 he only came to the brink4 of it and stood blind. He had driven her from him for ever, and his sense of loss was so acute that his soul cried out for the cure rather than for the name of the malady5.
 
In time he would have realised what had happened, but time was denied him, for just as he was starting for the mud house Babbie saved his dignity by returning to him. It was not her custom to fix her eyes on the ground as she walked, but she was doing so now, and at the same time swinging the empty pans. Doubtless she had come back for more water, in the belief that Gavin had gone. He pronounced her name with a sense of guilt6, and she looked up surprised, or seemingly surprised, to find him still there.
 
“I thought you had gone away long ago,” she said stiffly.
 
“Otherwise,” asked Gavin the dejected, “you would not have come back to the well?”
 
“Certainly not.”
 
“I am very sorry. Had you waited another moment I should have been gone.”
 
170
This was said in apology, but the wilful7 Egyptian chose to change its meaning.
 
“You have no right to blame me for disturbing you,” she declared with warmth.
 
“I did not. I only——”
 
“You could have been a mile away by this time. Nanny wanted more water.”
 
Babbie scrutinised the minister sharply as she made this statement. Surely her conscience troubled her, for on his not answering immediately she said, “Do you presume to disbelieve me? What could have made me return except to fill the pans again?”
 
“Nothing,” Gavin admitted eagerly, “and I assure you——”
 
Babbie should have been grateful to his denseness8, but it merely set her mind at rest.
 
“Say anything against me you choose,” she told him. “Say it as brutally10 as you like, for I won’t listen.”
 
She stopped to hear his response to that, and she looked so cold that it almost froze on Gavin’s lips.
 
“I had no right,” he said, dolefully, “to speak to you as I did.”
 
“You had not,” answered the proud Egyptian. She was looking away from him to show that his repentance11 was not even interesting to her. However, she had forgotten already not to listen.
 
“What business is it of mine?” asked Gavin, amazed at his late presumption12, “whether you are a gypsy or no?”
 
“None whatever.”
 
“And as for the ring——”
 
Here he gave her an opportunity of allowing that his curiosity about the ring was warranted. She declined to help him, however, and so he had to go on.
 
“The ring is yours,” he said, “and why should you not wear it?”
 
“Why, indeed?”
 
171
“I am afraid I have a very bad temper.”
 
He paused for a contradiction, but she nodded her head in agreement.
 
“And it is no wonder,” he continued, “that you think me a—a brute13.”
 
“I’m sure it is not.”
 
“But, Babbie, I want you to know that I despise myself for my base suspicions. No sooner did I see them than I loathed14 them and myself for harbouring them. Despite this mystery, I look upon you as a noble-hearted girl. I shall always think of you so.”
 
This time Babbie did not reply.
 
“That was all I had to say,” concluded Gavin, “except that I hope you will not punish Nanny for my sins. Good-bye.”
 
“Good-bye,” said the Egyptian, who was looking at the well.
 
The minister’s legs could not have heard him give the order to march, for they stood waiting.
 
“I thought,” said the Egyptian, after a moment, “that you said you were going.”
 
“I was only—brushing my hat,” Gavin answered with dignity. “You want me to go?”
 
She bowed, and this time he did set off.
 
“You can go if you like,” she remarked now.
 
He turned at this.
 
“But you said——” he began, diffidently.
 
“No, I did not,” she answered, with indignation.
 
He could see her face at last.
 
“You—you are crying!” he exclaimed, in bewilderment.
 
“Because you are so unfeeling,” sobbed15 Babbie.
 
“What have I said, what have I done?” cried Gavin, in an agony of self-contempt. “Oh, that I had gone away at once!”
 
“That is cruel.”
 
“What is?”
 
172
“To say that.”
 
“What did I say?”
 
“That you wished you had gone away.”
 
“But surely,” the minister faltered16, “you asked me to go.”
 
“How can you say so?” asked the gypsy, reproachfully.
 
Gavin was distracted. “On my word,” he said, earnestly, “I thought you did. And now I have made you unhappy. Babbie, I wish I were anybody but myself; I am a hopeless lout17.”
 
“Now you are unjust,” said Babbie, hiding her face.
 
“Again? To you?”
 
“No, you stupid,” she said, beaming on him in her most delightful18 manner, “to yourself!”
 
She gave him both her hands impetuously, and he did not let them go until she added:
 
“I am so glad that you are reasonable at last. Men are so much more unreasonable19 than women, don’t you think?”
 
“Perhaps we are,” Gavin said, diplomatically.
 
“Of course you are. Why, every one knows that. Well, I forgive you; only remember, you have admitted that it was all your fault?”
 
She was pointing her finger at him like a schoolmistress, and Gavin hastened to answer—
 
“You were not to blame at all.”
 
“I like to hear you say that,” explained the representative of the more reasonable sex, “because it was really all my fault.”
 
“No, no.”
 
“Yes, it was; but of course I could not say so until you had asked my pardon. You must understand that?”
 
The representative of the less reasonable sex could not understand it, but he agreed recklessly, and it seemed so plain to the woman that she continued confidentially—
 
173
“I pretended that I did not want to make it up, but I did.”
 
“Did you?” asked Gavin, elated.
 
“Yes, but nothing could have induced me to make the first advance. You see why?”
 
“Because I was so unreasonable?” asked Gavin, doubtfully.
 
“Yes, and nasty. You admit you were nasty?”
 
“Undoubtedly, I have an evil temper. It has brought me to shame many times.”
 
“Oh, I don’t know,” said the Egyptian, charitably. “I like it. I believe I admire bullies20.”
 
“Did I bully21 you?”
 
“I never knew such a bully. You quite frightened me.”
 
Gavin began to be less displeased22 with himself.
 
“You are sure,” inquired Babbie, “that you had no right to question me about the ring?”
 
“Certain,” answered Gavin.
 
“Then I will tell you all about it,” said Babbie, “for it is natural that you should want to know.”
 
He looked eagerly at her, and she had become serious and sad.
 
“I must tell you at the same time,” she said, “who I am, and then—then we shall never see each other any more.”
 
“Why should you tell me?” cried Gavin, his hand rising to stop her.
 
“Because you have a right to know,” she replied, now too much in earnest to see that she was yielding a point. “I should prefer not to tell you; yet there is nothing wrong in my secret, and it may make you think of me kindly23 when I have gone away.”
 
“Don’t speak in that way, Babbie, after you have forgiven me.”
 
“Did I hurt you? It was only because I know that you cannot trust me while I remain a mystery. I know 174 you would try to trust me, but doubts would cross your mind. Yes, they would; they are the shadows that mysteries cast. Who can believe a gypsy if the odds24 are against her?”
 
“I can,” said Gavin; but she shook her head, and so would he had he remembered three recent sermons of his own preaching.
 
“I had better tell you all,” she said, with an effort.
 
“It is my turn now to refuse to listen to you,” exclaimed Gavin, who was only a chivalrous25 boy. “Babbie, I should like to hear your story, but until you want to tell it to me I will not listen to it. I have faith in your honour, and that is sufficient.”
 
It was boyish, but I am glad Gavin said it; and now Babbie admired something in him that deserved admiration26. His faith, no doubt, made her a better woman.
 
“I admit that I would rather tell you nothing just now,” she said, gratefully. “You are sure you will never say again that you don’t understand me?”
 
“Quite sure,” said Gavin, bravely. “And by-and-by you will offer to tell me of your free will?”
 
“Oh, don’t let us think of the future,” answered Babbie. “Let us be happy for the moment.”
 
This had been the Egyptian’s philosophy always, but it was ill-suited for Auld27 Licht ministers, as one of them was presently to discover.
 
“I want to make one confession28, though,” Babbie continued, almost reluctantly. “When you were so nasty a little while ago, I didn’t go back to Nanny’s. I stood watching you from behind a tree, and then, for an excuse to come back, I—I poured out the water. Yes, and I told you another lie. I really came back to admit that it was all my fault, if I could not get you to say that it was yours. I am so glad you gave in first.”
 
She was very near him, and the tears had not yet dried on her eyes. They were laughing eyes, eyes in 175 distress29, imploring30 eyes. Her pale face, smiling, sad, dimpled, yet entreating31 forgiveness, was the one prominent thing in the world to him just then. He wanted to kiss her. He would have done it as soon as her eyes rested on his, but she continued without regarding him—
 
“How mean that sounds! Oh, if I were a man I should wish to be everything that I am not, and nothing that I am. I should scorn to be a liar32, I should choose to be open in all things, I should try to fight the world honestly. But I am only a woman, and so—well, that is the kind of man I should like to marry.”
 
“A minister may be all these things,” said Gavin, breathlessly.
 
“The man I could love,” Babbie went on, not heeding33 him, almost forgetting that he was there, “must not spend his days in idleness as the men I know do.”
 
“I do not.”
 
“He must be brave, no mere9 worker among others, but a leader of men.”
 
“All ministers are.”
 
“Who makes his influence felt.”
 
“Assuredly.”
 
“And takes the side of the weak against the strong, even though the strong be in the right.”
 
“Always my tendency.”
 
“A man who has a mind of his own, and having once made it up stands to it in defiance34 even of——”
 
“Of his session.”
 
“Of the world. He must understand me.”
 
“I do.”
 
“And be my master.”
 
“It is his lawful35 position in the house.”
 
“He must not yield to my coaxing36 or tempers.”
 
“It would be weakness.”
 
“But compel me to do his bidding; yes, even thrash me if——”
 
176
“If you won’t listen to reason. Babbie,” cried Gavin, “I am that man!”
 
Here the inventory37 abruptly38 ended, and these two people found themselves staring at each other, as if of a sudden they had heard something dreadful. I do not know how long they stood thus, motionless and horrified39. I cannot tell even which stirred first. All I know is that almost simultaneously40 they turned from each other and hurried out of the wood in opposite directions.

点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 impervious 2ynyU     
adj.不能渗透的,不能穿过的,不易伤害的
参考例句:
  • He was completely impervious to criticism.他对批评毫不在乎。
  • This material is impervious to gases and liquids.气体和液体都透不过这种物质。
2 mechanism zCWxr     
n.机械装置;机构,结构
参考例句:
  • The bones and muscles are parts of the mechanism of the body.骨骼和肌肉是人体的组成部件。
  • The mechanism of the machine is very complicated.这台机器的结构是非常复杂的。
3 apparently tMmyQ     
adv.显然地;表面上,似乎
参考例句:
  • An apparently blind alley leads suddenly into an open space.山穷水尽,豁然开朗。
  • He was apparently much surprised at the news.他对那个消息显然感到十分惊异。
4 brink OWazM     
n.(悬崖、河流等的)边缘,边沿
参考例句:
  • The tree grew on the brink of the cliff.那棵树生长在峭壁的边缘。
  • The two countries were poised on the brink of war.这两个国家处于交战的边缘。
5 malady awjyo     
n.病,疾病(通常做比喻)
参考例句:
  • There is no specific remedy for the malady.没有医治这种病的特效药。
  • They are managing to control the malady into a small range.他们设法将疾病控制在小范围之内。
6 guilt 9e6xr     
n.犯罪;内疚;过失,罪责
参考例句:
  • She tried to cover up her guilt by lying.她企图用谎言掩饰自己的罪行。
  • Don't lay a guilt trip on your child about schoolwork.别因为功课责备孩子而使他觉得很内疚。
7 wilful xItyq     
adj.任性的,故意的
参考例句:
  • A wilful fault has no excuse and deserves no pardon.不能宽恕故意犯下的错误。
  • He later accused reporters of wilful distortion and bias.他后来指责记者有意歪曲事实并带有偏见。
8 denseness 7be922e2b89558cfee4c439804972e03     
稠密,密集,浓厚; 稠度
参考例句:
  • Real estate industry is one of the typical capital denseness industries. 房地产业是一个非常典型的资本密集型行业。
  • India is one of the countries that have great denseness in population. 印度是人口高度密集的国家之一。
9 mere rC1xE     
adj.纯粹的;仅仅,只不过
参考例句:
  • That is a mere repetition of what you said before.那不过是重复了你以前讲的话。
  • It's a mere waste of time waiting any longer.再等下去纯粹是浪费时间。
10 brutally jSRya     
adv.残忍地,野蛮地,冷酷无情地
参考例句:
  • The uprising was brutally put down.起义被残酷地镇压下去了。
  • A pro-democracy uprising was brutally suppressed.一场争取民主的起义被残酷镇压了。
11 repentance ZCnyS     
n.懊悔
参考例句:
  • He shows no repentance for what he has done.他对他的所作所为一点也不懊悔。
  • Christ is inviting sinners to repentance.基督正在敦请有罪的人悔悟。
12 presumption XQcxl     
n.推测,可能性,冒昧,放肆,[法律]推定
参考例句:
  • Please pardon my presumption in writing to you.请原谅我很冒昧地写信给你。
  • I don't think that's a false presumption.我认为那并不是错误的推测。
13 brute GSjya     
n.野兽,兽性
参考例句:
  • The aggressor troops are not many degrees removed from the brute.侵略军简直象一群野兽。
  • That dog is a dangerous brute.It bites people.那条狗是危险的畜牲,它咬人。
14 loathed dbdbbc9cf5c853a4f358a2cd10c12ff2     
v.憎恨,厌恶( loathe的过去式和过去分词 );极不喜欢
参考例句:
  • Baker loathed going to this red-haired young pup for supplies. 面包师傅不喜欢去这个红头发的自负的傻小子那里拿原料。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • Therefore, above all things else, he loathed his miserable self! 因此,他厌恶不幸的自我尤胜其它! 来自英汉文学 - 红字
15 sobbed 4a153e2bbe39eef90bf6a4beb2dba759     
哭泣,啜泣( sob的过去式和过去分词 ); 哭诉,呜咽地说
参考例句:
  • She sobbed out the story of her son's death. 她哭诉着她儿子的死。
  • She sobbed out the sad story of her son's death. 她哽咽着诉说她儿子死去的悲惨经过。
16 faltered d034d50ce5a8004ff403ab402f79ec8d     
(嗓音)颤抖( falter的过去式和过去分词 ); 支吾其词; 蹒跚; 摇晃
参考例句:
  • He faltered out a few words. 他支吾地说出了几句。
  • "Er - but he has such a longhead!" the man faltered. 他不好意思似的嚅嗫着:“这孩子脑袋真长。”
17 lout 83eyW     
n.粗鄙的人;举止粗鲁的人
参考例句:
  • He's just an ill-bred lout.他是个缺乏教养的乡巴佬。
  • He had no training, no skills and he was just a big, bungling,useless lout!什么也不行,什么也不会,自己只是个傻大黑粗的废物!
18 delightful 6xzxT     
adj.令人高兴的,使人快乐的
参考例句:
  • We had a delightful time by the seashore last Sunday.上星期天我们在海滨玩得真痛快。
  • Peter played a delightful melody on his flute.彼得用笛子吹奏了一支欢快的曲子。
19 unreasonable tjLwm     
adj.不讲道理的,不合情理的,过度的
参考例句:
  • I know that they made the most unreasonable demands on you.我知道他们对你提出了最不合理的要求。
  • They spend an unreasonable amount of money on clothes.他们花在衣服上的钱太多了。
20 bullies bullies     
n.欺凌弱小者, 开球 vt.恐吓, 威胁, 欺负
参考例句:
  • Standing up to bullies takes plenty of backbone. 勇敢地对付暴徒需有大无畏精神。
  • Bullies can make your life hell. 恃强欺弱者能让你的日子像活地狱。
21 bully bully     
n.恃强欺弱者,小流氓;vt.威胁,欺侮
参考例句:
  • A bully is always a coward.暴汉常是懦夫。
  • The boy gave the bully a pelt on the back with a pebble.那男孩用石子掷击小流氓的背脊。
22 displeased 1uFz5L     
a.不快的
参考例句:
  • The old man was displeased and darted an angry look at me. 老人不高兴了,瞪了我一眼。
  • He was displeased about the whole affair. 他对整个事情感到很不高兴。
23 kindly tpUzhQ     
adj.和蔼的,温和的,爽快的;adv.温和地,亲切地
参考例句:
  • Her neighbours spoke of her as kindly and hospitable.她的邻居都说她和蔼可亲、热情好客。
  • A shadow passed over the kindly face of the old woman.一道阴影掠过老太太慈祥的面孔。
24 odds n5czT     
n.让步,机率,可能性,比率;胜败优劣之别
参考例句:
  • The odds are 5 to 1 that she will win.她获胜的机会是五比一。
  • Do you know the odds of winning the lottery once?你知道赢得一次彩票的几率多大吗?
25 chivalrous 0Xsz7     
adj.武士精神的;对女人彬彬有礼的
参考例句:
  • Men are so little chivalrous now.现在的男人几乎没有什么骑士风度了。
  • Toward women he was nobly restrained and chivalrous.对于妇女,他表现得高尚拘谨,尊敬三分。
26 admiration afpyA     
n.钦佩,赞美,羡慕
参考例句:
  • He was lost in admiration of the beauty of the scene.他对风景之美赞不绝口。
  • We have a great admiration for the gold medalists.我们对金牌获得者极为敬佩。
27 auld Fuxzt     
adj.老的,旧的
参考例句:
  • Should auld acquaintance be forgot,and never brought to mind?怎能忘记旧日朋友,心中能不怀念?
  • The party ended up with the singing of Auld Lang Sync.宴会以《友谊地久天长》的歌声而告终。
28 confession 8Ygye     
n.自白,供认,承认
参考例句:
  • Her confession was simply tantamount to a casual explanation.她的自白简直等于一篇即席说明。
  • The police used torture to extort a confession from him.警察对他用刑逼供。
29 distress 3llzX     
n.苦恼,痛苦,不舒适;不幸;vt.使悲痛
参考例句:
  • Nothing could alleviate his distress.什么都不能减轻他的痛苦。
  • Please don't distress yourself.请你不要忧愁了。
30 imploring cb6050ff3ff45d346ac0579ea33cbfd6     
恳求的,哀求的
参考例句:
  • Those calm, strange eyes could see her imploring face. 那平静的,没有表情的眼睛还能看得到她的乞怜求情的面容。
  • She gave him an imploring look. 她以哀求的眼神看着他。
31 entreating 8c1a0bd5109c6bc77bc8e612f8bff4a0     
恳求,乞求( entreat的现在分词 )
参考例句:
  • We have not bound your feet with our entreating arms. 我们不曾用恳求的手臂来抱住你的双足。
  • The evening has come. Weariness clings round me like the arms of entreating love. 夜来到了,困乏像爱的恳求用双臂围抱住我。
32 liar V1ixD     
n.说谎的人
参考例句:
  • I know you for a thief and a liar!我算认识你了,一个又偷又骗的家伙!
  • She was wrongly labelled a liar.她被错误地扣上说谎者的帽子。
33 heeding e57191803bfd489e6afea326171fe444     
v.听某人的劝告,听从( heed的现在分词 )
参考例句:
  • This come of heeding people who say one thing and mean another! 有些人嘴里一回事,心里又是一回事,今天这个下场都是听信了这种人的话的结果。 来自辞典例句
  • Her dwarfish spouse still smoked his cigar and drank his rum without heeding her. 她那矮老公还在吸他的雪茄,喝他的蔗酒,睬也不睬她。 来自辞典例句
34 defiance RmSzx     
n.挑战,挑衅,蔑视,违抗
参考例句:
  • He climbed the ladder in defiance of the warning.他无视警告爬上了那架梯子。
  • He slammed the door in a spirit of defiance.他以挑衅性的态度把门砰地一下关上。
35 lawful ipKzCt     
adj.法律许可的,守法的,合法的
参考例句:
  • It is not lawful to park in front of a hydrant.在消火栓前停车是不合法的。
  • We don't recognised him to be the lawful heir.我们不承认他为合法继承人。
36 coaxing 444e70224820a50b0202cb5bb05f1c2e     
v.哄,用好话劝说( coax的现在分词 );巧言骗取;哄劝,劝诱;“锻炼”效应
参考例句:
  • No amount of coaxing will make me change my mind. 任你费尽口舌也不会说服我改变主意。
  • It took a lot of coaxing before he agreed. 劝说了很久他才同意。 来自辞典例句
37 inventory 04xx7     
n.详细目录,存货清单
参考例句:
  • Some stores inventory their stock once a week.有些商店每周清点存货一次。
  • We will need to call on our supplier to get more inventory.我们必须请供应商送来更多存货。
38 abruptly iINyJ     
adv.突然地,出其不意地
参考例句:
  • He gestured abruptly for Virginia to get in the car.他粗鲁地示意弗吉尼亚上车。
  • I was abruptly notified that a half-hour speech was expected of me.我突然被通知要讲半个小时的话。
39 horrified 8rUzZU     
a.(表现出)恐惧的
参考例句:
  • The whole country was horrified by the killings. 全国都对这些凶杀案感到大为震惊。
  • We were horrified at the conditions prevailing in local prisons. 地方监狱的普遍状况让我们震惊。
40 simultaneously 4iBz1o     
adv.同时发生地,同时进行地
参考例句:
  • The radar beam can track a number of targets almost simultaneously.雷达波几乎可以同时追着多个目标。
  • The Windows allow a computer user to execute multiple programs simultaneously.Windows允许计算机用户同时运行多个程序。


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