With the longer days, Lorraine was often up at Windy Howe. It was the sort of household where you could arrive at any time without presenting an apology for your intrusion.
"You must take us just as you find us," said Claudia. "You know I'm glad to see you, Lorraine, but I shan't treat you as a visitor, and have you shown into the drawing-room. You don't mind?"
Claudia was sitting in the nursery, rocking the [169]latest addition to the Castleton family, a tiny white bundle, with golden down on its pink head. She nursed it dutifully, patting its back with the experience gained with seven other younger brothers and sisters.
"Yes, it's rather sweet," she agreed, in answer to a comment from Lorraine. "I'd like them all right if they didn't cry so much; it's such a nuisance when they're perpetually squalling. The fact is I'm fed up with children. I never seem able to get away from them here. I've the greatest difficulty in doing my home lessons. Violet's always asking me to take the baby or Perugia, and Lilith and Constable6 are generally tearing about somewhere, to say nothing of Beata and Romola and Madox. Lorraine, I've quite made up my mind. I'm seventeen now, and I'm leaving school this summer. I'm not going to stay at home and just help with the children! It isn't good enough!"
"What would you like to do?" asked Lorraine, watching with sympathy while her friend made another effort to soothe7 the obstreperous8 new little brother to sleep.
"I don't know!" said Claudia forlornly. "I don't seem good for anything except to do odd jobs. Perhaps I'll go on the land. It would be a change to make hay and hoe turnips9. I should be away from Violet, anyhow. We've been squabbling again dreadfully of late. I can't stand it much longer. If Morland's called up, I'm going off too. I don't care where!"
She spoke10 resentfully, almost desperately11; Lorraine [170]had not seen her in such a mood before. She had sometimes guessed that her friend was not altogether happy at home, though until to-day she had never received such a big slice of Claudia's confidence.
The baby was crying so lustily that conversation was difficult. Claudia's remarks were punctuated13 by the regular tap-tap of the rockers on her chair.
"I've asked Father, but it's no use; he won't send me. He says it's Beata's and Romola's turn now, and they must go to school. Life's horrid—I just hate it all!"
"Poor little man! He doesn't like life either!" soothed15 Claudia. "There! There! Are his toes cold? Sissie'll warm them for him. It's no use; I shall have to take him to Violet, and she's trying to write letters!"
This little peep behind the scenes at Windy Howe made Lorraine feel worried about Claudia. The next time she went to the studio by the harbour, she talked the matter over. Margaret Lindsay knew the Castleton family so well that she might be counted upon for advice.
"Claudia's simply fed up!" explained Lorraine. "It's partly the children, but principally Violet. I don't think I should like to live with Violet myself."
"Perhaps not, yet she has her good points. [171]On the whole I think she's very decent to all those step-children. With her own little tribe as well, it must be difficult to manage the household. But I sympathize with Claudia. When she leaves school I'm sure it will be far the best plan for her to go away from home for a while."
"But her father won't let her!"
"Suppose she could win a scholarship? I fancy that would smooth the way."
"Oh, do you think she could?"
"Suppose you ask Miss Kingsley if she can suggest any career for Claudia? She's sure to be interested in her pupils' plans for the future. I certainly think it's a shame for the girl to be kept at home acting16 nursemaid to the younger ones. I'd willingly tackle Mr. Castleton some day and have a little talk with him about Claudia, if there's any plan to propose. I knew her own mother, so that gives me a pull. I'd speak to Violet, too. I dare say she'd be quite nice about it."
"Oh, Carina, I wish you would! I think Claudia has a wretched time. Do you know, the children got hold of the album I gave her for her birthday, and they scribbled17 all over it? And Violet didn't even scold them. Wasn't it trying? She lets them scramble18 about everywhere and do what they like. Claudia's so worried, she says her hair's beginning to fall out."
"I didn't know her hair was falling out. She'd better cut it short, in that case. She mustn't on any account let that lovely hair be neglected."
[172]Miss Kingsley, on being appealed to, was deeply interested. She talked things over with Miss Janet, and they came at once to a conclusion. There was nothing for it but a good kindergarten training. There were several open scholarships for a kindergarten college whose principal was an intimate friend of theirs. They would write about it at once, and Claudia must go in for the examination. They would make a point of coaching her specially19. In their minds the whole matter was already decided20. It would be a splendid chance for the girl, so they said. That wise old Greek slave Æsop, who knew human nature so well that his fables21 are as true to life now as they were two thousand years ago, tells the story of a king who wished to fortify22 his castle. He asked advice, and the mason recommended bricks, the carpenter wood, and the tanner leather. Each thought his own trade supreme23. The Misses Kingsley were perfectly24 sure that Claudia, who was experienced with children, would succeed admirably in kindergarten work. They even saw visions of her being established some day at The Gables in the capacity of a mistress.
Claudia, on being introduced to her future prospects25, gasped26 a little. She acquiesced27, but did not look quite as grateful as her friends had anticipated.
"I'd get away from home, at any rate! And that would be something!" was all she would say to Lorraine.
"It would be a career!" said Lorraine, fresh from a brainy, bracing28 talk with Miss Janet. "Once [173]you've got your training, you'll be independent and able to earn your own living."
"Um—yes——" Claudia spoke without enthusiasm. "I wonder what the college would be like? Jolly hard work, I expect!"
"Miss Janet says it's adorable!"
"Oh! There are several scholarships. I wish you'd go in for one and come too; then we should be together."
It was Lorraine's turn to look blank. It is one thing to recommend a vocation29 to a friend, and quite another to take it up yourself. Viewed from her own standpoint, the joys of a kindergarten training did not seem so attractive. She began to wonder whether Miss Janet had overstated them and the delights of independence.
"I—I don't know yet whether I want to leave home, and if I do, I'm going to study art!" she stammered30 lamely31.
"I wish I could study music, but there's not the faintest little atom of a chance of doing that," returned Claudia bitterly.
Nevertheless, at Miss Kingsley's insistence32, she set to work diligently33 to read up for the open scholarship examination. Miss Janet kindly34 coached her, and gave up many hours of leisure on her behalf. Claudia was quite clever at lessons when she chose to apply herself. The progress she made under this private tuition delighted Miss Janet. Miss Kingsley wrote fully5 to her friend the principal of the college, and received a most encouraging reply.
[174]"The girl you mention seems just the kind of student we wish to procure35 at present," wrote Miss Halden. "I am allowed a certain liberty of selection, and, so long as a candidate's marks do not fall below a given standard, I may make my own choice. I am not necessarily obliged to award the scholarships to those who send in the best papers, but to those who, after a personal interview, I consider would in the end make the most successful teachers. There are other qualifications to consider besides examination points. Charm of manner is an extremely valuable asset in dealing36 with children; and I would rather train a girl who is gifted with imagination and tact37 than the most erudite student who is deficient38 in these necessary qualities. If Claudia Castleton is what you say, and you can coach her sufficiently39 to gain a pass, I think she may be almost sure of a scholarship."
The Misses Kingsley were most excited at the receipt of this letter. They did not tell Claudia its full contents for fear she might slack off work, but they could not help throwing out hints.
"It's something to have friends at Court!" beamed Miss Janet, as she put on her pince-nez and took her pupil for Latin construction. "You see, we know Miss Halden so very well. I fancy there's luck in store for you, Claudia!"
"Yes," said Claudia dolefully, as she looked up a last word in the dictionary.
Margaret Lindsay had taken the opportunity of a visit to the studio at Windy Howe to speak to Mr. Castleton on the subject of the possible scholarship. [175]He was busy painting at the time, and far more interested in the proper perspective of his background than in his daughter's future prospects. He agreed abstractedly with anything that was suggested.
"If they'll give her a free training, let her go by all means—don't you think that pearly grey throws the cliff into relief?—I've no doubt Miss Kingsley's right—I think that gorse-bush is an improvement—yes, she's getting a big girl, I suppose—I had made the cliff darker, but I like the sun on it—the children grow up so fast—I'm glad you like that shade of brown under the rock, because I consider it brings out the whole picture."
"I'm sure I don't want to stand in the girl's light," she sobbed41. "If it's the right thing for her to leave home, I suppose she must; but nobody need say I've turned her out. I shouldn't have thought it would be any more fun teaching kindergarten than helping42 to look after her own brothers and sisters! However, that's a matter of opinion, and I've always tried to do my best by my husband's children, but it's small thanks one gets for it all."
The examination for the scholarship was to be held in London, and candidates were required to fill up beforehand certain papers of application and forward them to the College. The forms arrived on the very last day of term. Miss Janet summoned Claudia to the study and gave them to her.
[176]"They must be signed by your father," she explained, "and you must post them not later than the sixth. The envelope is already addressed, and my sister and I have filled in our part of the application. All you have to do is to get Mr. Castleton's signature. When Miss Halden receives these papers, she will send you a card of admission for the examination. That will not be for three weeks, so I shall see you again before you have to go up to London. Be sure to go on with your work during the holidays, and give special attention to Latin grammar."
"Yes, Miss Janet," said Claudia dutifully, taking the large envelope and slipping it into her coat pocket.
"Post it to-morrow," urged Miss Janet, as she dismissed her pupil from the study.
The advent43 of Easter saw Rosemary again at Porthkeverne. She not only returned for the holidays, but "came back for good". The secret which had haunted and puzzled Lorraine since Christmas was out at last. Rosemary had written home and told the plain, unvarnished, brutal44 truth.
"Signor Arezzo says it's no use my going on. He'll never be able to make anything of my voice. I've been at the Coll. two terms, and tried my best, but he says it's futile—I'm only fit to warble in a small drawing-room to friends who are not over-critical, and it's a waste of money to stop on here!"
This was indeed a blow. It was a very crushed, disappointed, miserable45 little Rosemary who returned to the bosom46 of her bewildered family. At [177]first they would not believe the severe decision, and passed through the stages of denial, indignation, and annoyance47 to realization48 and resignation. It is so very humiliating to find out that your swan, about whom you have cackled so proudly, turns out to be only an ordinary, domestic, farm-yard bird after all.
Evidently the first thing to be done was to comfort Rosemary. She needed it badly. She went about the house a pathetic little figure, with big wistful eyes.
"I'm heart-broken, Muvvie!" she sobbed in confidence.
"Never mind, darling; we want you at home if they don't want you at the College! You can go in for V.A.D. work, and help at the Red Cross Hospital. It's delightful49 for me to have my daughter back. You don't know how I shall appreciate your company!"
"But I feel I'm such a failure!"
"Not at all! You simply haven't slipped into your right niche50 yet. People sometimes make bad shots before they find their vocations51. Cheer up! Your singing is a great pleasure to us, if it's not fit for a concert platform."
"I never want to sing another note in all my life!" declared Rosemary.
Little by little details of the tragedy leaked out. Lorraine heard many of them, sitting on her sister's bed, while Rosemary ruefully unpacked52 the boxes of music and the tea-things and all the other treasured trifles she had taken to the College.
[178]"He says I haven't the physique for a singer. I've not got enough 'puff53' in my lungs. You should see Maudie Canning, his favourite pupil. She has the most enormous chest, and such a throat! Just look at mine!" (Rosemary was examining herself in the glass as she spoke.) "It stands to reason, if an organ hasn't proper pipes and bellows54, it can't sound. You want such a big voice to fill a concert-hall."
"But couldn't you go on with music just for yourself?"
"Signor Arezzo doesn't care to bother with amateurs. His time is so valuable that he gives it all to promising55 students only. No, I've quite made up my mind never to sing again! Don't argue with me! It's no use, and only makes me feel irritable56. I tell you I'm heart-broken!"
It was terrible to have Rosemary in such a disconsolate57 mood. It seemed to throw a blight58 over the whole family. Lorraine was immensely concerned. In her trouble she turned instinctively59 to the studio by the harbour. Margaret Lindsay, who herself had weathered many troubles, was an expert in the art of comfort.
"Rosemary's heart is broken!" said Lorraine tragically60, sitting on the window-seat in the sunshine, and squeezing her friend's arm.
"Poor child! Tell her that some of the best things in the world have been done on broken hearts! She's very young yet, and I'm sure she's wanted at home."
"That's what Mother says."
[179]"And perhaps she mightn't have liked public singing. It isn't all applause and bouquets61. I know several professionals, and they talk of long, weary railway journeys, and uncomfortable hotels, and many disagreeables that show a very shady lining62 to the life. Somehow I can far more easily fancy little Rosemary happily married and settled down in a home of her own, than touring about to concerts. You mustn't let her give up her singing! She'll make a most delightful amateur."
"She scorns the word 'amateur'."
"She's feeling sore at present, but she'll get over that stage, I hope. I'm not sure if an amateur hasn't infinitely63 the best of it. I often wish I were an amateur artist. You skim the cream in the matter of enjoyment64, without any of the responsibility. In six months I hope Rosemary will think differently, and will be the star of the musical parties at Porthkeverne, if she can't shine on the stage."
"It's a come-down for her, all the same," groaned65 Lorraine. "I wish she could marry a duke! But no dukes ever come to Porthkeverne. Perhaps she won't marry at all. Some of the nicest people I know haven't married."
Margaret Lindsay looked out far away over the dancing, gleaming water before she answered; Lorraine could not see the shadow in her eyes.
"Sometimes it's the person whom you don't marry whom you love the most: the beautiful ideal is never shattered by the actual—it stays up in the clouds always, instead of trailing down to earth."
[180]Lorraine was lost in contemplation of her sister's future prospects.
"If she doesn't marry, she'll have to brace66 up and go in for some other vocation," she decided. "Miss Kingsley says one ought to look years ahead, but somehow I can't imagine Rosemary ever being middle-aged67."
"It's an art to grow grey gracefully," smiled Margaret Lindsay.
点击
收听单词发音
收听单词发音 |
1
fragrant
|
|
| adj.芬香的，馥郁的，愉快的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
2
shrubs
|
|
| 灌木( shrub的名词复数 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
3
primroses
|
|
| n.报春花( primrose的名词复数 )；淡黄色；追求享乐（招至恶果） | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
4
carnival
|
|
| n.嘉年华会，狂欢，狂欢节，巡回表演 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
5
fully
|
|
| adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
6
constable
|
|
| n.(英国)警察，警官 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
7
soothe
|
|
| v.安慰；使平静；使减轻；缓和；奉承 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
8
obstreperous
|
|
| adj.喧闹的，不守秩序的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
9
turnips
|
|
| 芜青( turnip的名词复数 )； 芜菁块根； 芜菁甘蓝块根； 怀表 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
10
spoke
|
|
| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
11
desperately
|
|
| adv.极度渴望地，绝望地，孤注一掷地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
12
vaguely
|
|
| adv.含糊地，暖昧地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
13
punctuated
|
|
| v.（在文字中）加标点符号，加标点( punctuate的过去式和过去分词 )；不时打断某事物 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
14
wail
|
|
| vt./vi.大声哀号，恸哭；呼啸，尖啸 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
15
soothed
|
|
| v.安慰( soothe的过去式和过去分词 )；抚慰；使舒服；减轻痛苦 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
16
acting
|
|
| n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
17
scribbled
|
|
| v.潦草的书写( scribble的过去式和过去分词 )；乱画；草草地写；匆匆记下 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
18
scramble
|
|
| v.爬行，攀爬，杂乱蔓延，碎片，片段，废料 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
19
specially
|
|
| adv.特定地；特殊地；明确地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
20
decided
|
|
| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
21
fables
|
|
| n.寓言( fable的名词复数 )；神话，传说 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
22
fortify
|
|
| v.强化防御，为…设防；加强，强化 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
23
supreme
|
|
| adj.极度的，最重要的；至高的，最高的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
24
perfectly
|
|
| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
25
prospects
|
|
| n.希望，前途(恒为复数) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
26
gasped
|
|
| v.喘气( gasp的过去式和过去分词 )；喘息；倒抽气；很想要 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
27
acquiesced
|
|
| v.默认，默许( acquiesce的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
28
bracing
|
|
| adj.令人振奋的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
29
vocation
|
|
| n.职业，行业 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
30
stammered
|
|
| v.结巴地说出( stammer的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
31
lamely
|
|
| 一瘸一拐地，不完全地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
32
insistence
|
|
| n.坚持；强调；坚决主张 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
33
diligently
|
|
| ad.industriously;carefully | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
34
kindly
|
|
| adj.和蔼的，温和的，爽快的；adv.温和地，亲切地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
35
procure
|
|
| vt.获得，取得，促成；vi.拉皮条 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
36
dealing
|
|
| n.经商方法，待人态度 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
37
tact
|
|
| n.机敏，圆滑，得体 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
38
deficient
|
|
| adj.不足的，不充份的，有缺陷的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
39
sufficiently
|
|
| adv.足够地，充分地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
40
tragic
|
|
| adj.悲剧的，悲剧性的，悲惨的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
41
sobbed
|
|
| 哭泣，啜泣( sob的过去式和过去分词 )； 哭诉，呜咽地说 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
42
helping
|
|
| n.食物的一份&adj.帮助人的，辅助的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
43
advent
|
|
| n.(重要事件等的)到来，来临 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
44
brutal
|
|
| adj.残忍的，野蛮的，不讲理的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
45
miserable
|
|
| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
46
bosom
|
|
| n.胸，胸部；胸怀；内心；adj.亲密的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
47
annoyance
|
|
| n.恼怒，生气，烦恼 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
48
realization
|
|
| n.实现；认识到，深刻了解 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
49
delightful
|
|
| adj.令人高兴的，使人快乐的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
50
niche
|
|
| n.壁龛；合适的职务(环境、位置等) | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
51
vocations
|
|
| n.（认为特别适合自己的）职业( vocation的名词复数 )；使命；神召；（认为某种工作或生活方式特别适合自己的）信心 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
52
unpacked
|
|
| v.从（包裹等）中取出（所装的东西），打开行李取出( unpack的过去式和过去分词 )；拆包；解除…的负担；吐露（心事等） | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
53
puff
|
|
| n.一口(气)；一阵(风)；v.喷气，喘气 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
54
bellows
|
|
| n.风箱；发出吼叫声，咆哮（尤指因痛苦）( bellow的名词复数 )；（愤怒地）说出（某事），大叫v.发出吼叫声，咆哮（尤指因痛苦）( bellow的第三人称单数 )；（愤怒地）说出（某事），大叫 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
55
promising
|
|
| adj.有希望的，有前途的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
56
irritable
|
|
| adj.急躁的；过敏的；易怒的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
57
disconsolate
|
|
| adj.忧郁的，不快的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
58
blight
|
|
| n.枯萎病；造成破坏的因素；vt.破坏，摧残 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
59
instinctively
|
|
| adv.本能地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
60
tragically
|
|
| adv. 悲剧地，悲惨地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
61
bouquets
|
|
| n.花束( bouquet的名词复数 )；（酒的）芳香 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
62
lining
|
|
| n.衬里，衬料 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
63
infinitely
|
|
| adv.无限地，无穷地 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
64
enjoyment
|
|
| n.乐趣；享有；享用 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
65
groaned
|
|
| v.呻吟( groan的过去式和过去分词 )；发牢骚；抱怨；受苦 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
66
brace
|
|
| n. 支柱,曲柄,大括号; v. 绷紧,顶住,(为困难或坏事)做准备 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
|
67
middle-aged
|
|
| adj.中年的 | |
参考例句： |
|
|
|
| 欢迎访问英文小说网 |