Connie refused to be drawn1 into further conversation for the present. She was very busy touching2 up certain sketches3 which she informed Mary were intended to illustrate4 the pages of a popular lady's novelette, the published price of which was a halfpenny. They were dreadful drawings, as Mary could see, grotesque5 exaggerations of the work of George Du Maurier, impossibly tall females, with regular doll-like features and long lashes6, with men of the same type. Five drawings went to each novelette, and the price paid was thirty shillings.
"As a matter of fact they are not mine," Connie explained, as she put the finishing touches to the figure of a severely7 classical duchess; "they are the work of a friend. She has been very ill lately and her work has fallen off in consequence. This lot would have been rejected by the editor, only I happen to know his assistant, who suggested that I should take them back and patch them up before they came under the eagle eye of the proprietor8. I can get the money for them this evening, and tell Grace that the editor asked me to bring it along."
"That does not seem quite--quite the right thing," Mary suggested.
"Oh yes it does," Connie said bluntly. "Grace Cameron is a lady, and a great friend of mine. This commission is all that she has to live on. I happen to know that last night she spent her last two shillings on the peculiar9 tonic10 medicine that is needful to her. Can't you imagine the poor girl's state of mind if those drawings had been returned? What would you do if you were the Recording11 Angel?"
Mary was silent. She had not looked at it in this light before. The delicacy12 and tactfulness of it, the fine self-abnegation, appealed to her strongly. With Connie, time was money, every hour she wasted represented the loss of some necessary of life. And here she was cheerfully spending her own golden minutes so that a poor invalid13 should not lack the peace of mind necessary to her recovery. This was a practical sermon for Mary, worked out to a womanly and logical conclusion. If Ralph Darnley could have looked into Mary's mind now he would have been pleased with the success of his experiment.
"Oh, how good of you," she cried, "how womanly and sweet! You are actually sacrificing yourself for the needs of others. I should never have thought of it."
"I shouldn't at one time," Connie admitted frankly14, "but I was a spoilt child in those days, and gave no heed15 to anybody but myself. And when I came to London alone and penniless and friendless, it was Grace Cameron who first held out a hand to me. And Grace is capable of doing really good work. She is very different from me. If she could only get into the country for a time and regain16 her strength she would be heard of. But that is impossible!"
"Why?" Mary asked. She was deeply interested now. "Why can't she?"
"Because she helps to keep a widowed mother. One pound a week goes to the poor old mother who is so proud of her girl's success. It is one of the most pathetic and charming stories in the world. Mrs. Cameron is the widow of a clergyman who left her very badly off, and Grace came to London to gain a name with her brush. She did not succeed, but she never let her mother know, she has always sent her something. And that 'something' makes all the world to the dear old lady. You may call it a deception17 if you like, but I call it one of the grandest things I have ever heard of. And all the while Grace is hoping for the name that does not come, the name that will enable her to go into the country and turn her back upon those impossible duchesses for ever. The story is known to a few of us, and we take it in turn now that Grace is ill to do her work for her. I am going down to Grace's rooms after supper, and you can come along with me if you like."
"Oh, yes, yes," Mary cried, "I should love to go with you. You may think that I am very foolish and ignorant, but you are opening up a new world to me. Positively18 I did not know that there were such things as these; even you are a new type to me. And here am I, who have been living with my head in the clouds, regarding the universe as being made up of people like the Dashwoods and others, whose privilege and duty it is to serve them. How selfish!"
"Well, you are not selfish now," Connie said. "You had the pluck to turn out and get your own living rather than eat what you call the bread of charity."
"Pride," Mary exclaimed, "every bit of it pride. I was bitterly wounded with a trick that Fortune had played upon me; in my arrogance19, I left home, though one kind heart bleeds for me. I only had my narrow point of view. And I hate this kind of thing, I could cry aloud at the sordidness20 of it. I can't endure it patiently as you do."
Connie laughed unsteadily. A mist crept into her eyes.
"It is because I have schooled myself," she said. "It is so weak to complain. But there are times when I should like to die and make an end of it all."
Again Mary had nothing to say. She was learning to plumb21 the depths of her own selfishness by comparison with others. She was beginning dumbly to understand what Ralph Darnley must think of her. And yet he had made no secret of his love and affection. She was strangely silent as she walked along with Connie in the darkness of the evening. They came at length to a mean little street leading off Tottenham Court Road, and before a fairly respectable house there, Connie stopped. Presently Mary found herself shaking hands with a tall, thin girl, who gave her the strange impression that her new acquaintance was made of some fragile china. Her clear skin was deadly pale, and the dark eyes seemed to burn in the face like sombre flames. The slender frame was racked now and then by distressing22 fits of coughing.
Yet there was a subtle strength and power about the girl that appealed to Mary. Here was a girl after her own heart, one who would struggle to the end, and if she had to die she would fall in her tracks without a murmur23.
Yet everything was against her. She had no natural advantages like Mary. There was more shame for the latter. Hitherto she had lived entirely24 for herself; her bounties25 had been dispensed26 with a haughty27 hand.
She had never dreamed of a kingdom inhabited by such brave, pure souls as these. Despite the shabby little sitting-room28 it was impossible to mistake Grace Cameron for anything but a lady. She had a smile of sweet sympathy as Connie made the necessary introduction, and spoke29 of Mary as another of the elect who had come into the arena30.
"You have my sympathy," the girl said with a pleasing smile, "I could wish a woman foe31 of mine no harder fate. Anybody can see that you have not been used to this kind of thing--you are too recently a commander to know the bitterness of being commanded by the canaille we frequently have to deal with. We cannot all meet our misfortunes as cheerfully as Connie does. But you will learn your lesson in time. Tell me, have you heard anything as to those last drawings of mine?"
"I have the money for them at any rate," Connie said without looking at the speaker. "Mr. Scudamore was very kind."
Grace Cameron drew a deep breath of relief, a wave of pink rose to her cheeks.
"They were dreadful," she whispered. "But I was so ill on Monday and Tuesday that I had to drag myself to the work. My hand shakes terribly still, and I have some kind of a commission that I must finish tomorrow. It is a design for the cover of a new penny weekly. I have the scheme sketched32 out, but I am afraid that I shall not be able to finish it. And I know that my mother is in great need of a few pounds. How hard it is to be like this."
The last few words rang out passionately33. Connie patted the speaker's shoulder.
"Don't despair," she said, "give me the rough design and I will put in the colour. Take at least five hours! Well, what of that. Give us some supper presently--it matters little what time we get home in the morning. Mrs. Grundy has no terrors for the true and tried children of Bohemia."
Connie's cheerfulness seemed to be unflagging and unfailing. She had no great aptitude34 for the brush, but she had the great gift of patience. The hours wore on, supper came and went, and presently a clock somewhere struck the hour of two. Then at last Connie held up the coloured design in triumph.
"There," she cried, "I guess they will be satisfied with that. I wish I had some of your boldness and originality35, Gracie. I think we've done it this time. What a shame it is that good stuff should go for so little money! And now I really must be off. Mary looks tired to death. I'll post this for you, if you like."
Mary was tired and worn out, but she was not thinking of herself as she dragged along by Connie's side. She had learned a great deal in the last four-and-twenty hours.
In a vague, disturbed way she felt ashamed of herself. She did not notice the little cry that broke from Connie as they stood before the house where their rooms were. The place was all in pitch darkness, a litter of straw lay before the door. As Connie applied36 her latchkey and pushed back the door the house sounded curiously37 hollow. Footfalls clanked on a bare floor. Connie struck a match and held it aloft.
"The house is empty!" she cried, "the people have gone. These things happen with the struggling poor when they are threatened over their rent. Let us go and see if they have packed our belongings38 in the confusion."
The little sitting-room was empty of everything, the bedroom the same; nothing was left.
"My writing-case!" Mary cried, "my purse, too, in my box. And in the case--my jewels. Connie, Connie, what will become of us?"
点击收听单词发音
1 drawn | |
v.拖,拉,拔出;adj.憔悴的,紧张的 | |
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2 touching | |
adj.动人的,使人感伤的 | |
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3 sketches | |
n.草图( sketch的名词复数 );素描;速写;梗概 | |
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4 illustrate | |
v.举例说明,阐明;图解,加插图 | |
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5 grotesque | |
adj.怪诞的,丑陋的;n.怪诞的图案,怪人(物) | |
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6 lashes | |
n.鞭挞( lash的名词复数 );鞭子;突然猛烈的一击;急速挥动v.鞭打( lash的第三人称单数 );煽动;紧系;怒斥 | |
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7 severely | |
adv.严格地;严厉地;非常恶劣地 | |
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8 proprietor | |
n.所有人;业主;经营者 | |
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9 peculiar | |
adj.古怪的,异常的;特殊的,特有的 | |
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10 tonic | |
n./adj.滋补品,补药,强身的,健体的 | |
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11 recording | |
n.录音,记录 | |
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12 delicacy | |
n.精致,细微,微妙,精良;美味,佳肴 | |
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13 invalid | |
n.病人,伤残人;adj.有病的,伤残的;无效的 | |
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14 frankly | |
adv.坦白地,直率地;坦率地说 | |
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15 heed | |
v.注意,留意;n.注意,留心 | |
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16 regain | |
vt.重新获得,收复,恢复 | |
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17 deception | |
n.欺骗,欺诈;骗局,诡计 | |
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18 positively | |
adv.明确地,断然,坚决地;实在,确实 | |
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19 arrogance | |
n.傲慢,自大 | |
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20 sordidness | |
n.肮脏;污秽;卑鄙;可耻 | |
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21 plumb | |
adv.精确地,完全地;v.了解意义,测水深 | |
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22 distressing | |
a.使人痛苦的 | |
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23 murmur | |
n.低语,低声的怨言;v.低语,低声而言 | |
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24 entirely | |
ad.全部地,完整地;完全地,彻底地 | |
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25 bounties | |
(由政府提供的)奖金( bounty的名词复数 ); 赏金; 慷慨; 大方 | |
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26 dispensed | |
v.分配( dispense的过去式和过去分词 );施与;配(药) | |
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27 haughty | |
adj.傲慢的,高傲的 | |
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28 sitting-room | |
n.(BrE)客厅,起居室 | |
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29 spoke | |
n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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30 arena | |
n.竞技场,运动场所;竞争场所,舞台 | |
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31 foe | |
n.敌人,仇敌 | |
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32 sketched | |
v.草拟(sketch的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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33 passionately | |
ad.热烈地,激烈地 | |
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34 aptitude | |
n.(学习方面的)才能,资质,天资 | |
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35 originality | |
n.创造力,独创性;新颖 | |
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36 applied | |
adj.应用的;v.应用,适用 | |
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37 curiously | |
adv.有求知欲地;好问地;奇特地 | |
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38 belongings | |
n.私人物品,私人财物 | |
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