It had been a heavenly picnic the little trio all agreed as to that; and when Ivory saw the Baxter girls coming up the shady path that led along the river from the Indian Cellar to the bridge, it was a merry group and a transfigured Rodman that caught his eye. The boy, trailing on behind with the baskets and laden1 with tin dippers and wildflowers, seemed another creature from the big-eyed, quiet little lad he saw every day. He had chattered2 like a magpie3, eaten like a bear, is torn his jacket getting wild columbines for Patty, been nicely darned by Waitstill, and was in a state of hilarity4 that rendered him quite unrecognizable.
"We've had a lovely picnic!" called Patty; "I wish you had been with us!"
"You didn't ask me!" smiled Ivory, picking up Waitstill's mending-basket from the nook in the trees where she had hidden it for safe-keeping.
"We've played games, Ivory," cried the boy. "Patty made them up herself. First we had the 'Landing of the Pilgrims,' and Waitstill made believe be the figurehead of the Mayflower. She stood on a great boulder5 and sang:--
'The breaking waves dashed high
On a stern and rock-bound coast'--
and, oh! she was splendid! Then Patty was Pocahontas and I was Cap'n John Smith, and look, we are all dressed up for the Indian wedding!"
Waitstill had on a crown of white birch bark and her braid of hair, twined with running ever-green, fell to her waist. Patty was wreathed with columbines and decked with some turkey feathers that she had put in her basket as too pretty to throw away. Waitstill looked rather conscious in her unusual finery, but Patty sported it with the reckless ease and innocent vanity that characterized her.
"I shall have to run into father's store to put myself tidy," Waitstill said, "so good-bye, Rodman, we'll have another picnic some day. Patty, you must do the chores this afternoon, you know, so that I can go to choir6 rehearsal7."
Rodman and Patty started up the hill gayly with their burdens, and Ivory walked by Waitstill's side as she pulled off her birch-bark crown and twisted her braid around her head with a heightened color at being watched.
"I'll say good-bye now, Ivory, but I'll see you at the meeting-house," she said, as she neared the store. "I'll go in here and brush the pine needles off, wash my hands, and rest a little before rehearsal. That's a puzzling anthem8 we have for to-morrow."
"I have my horse here; let me drive you up to the church."
"I can't, Ivory, thank you. Father's orders are against my driving out with any one, you know."
"Very well, the road is free, at any rate. I'll hitch9 my horse down here in the woods somewhere and when you start to walk I shall follow and catch up with you. There's luckily only one way to reach the church from here, and your father can't blame us if we both take it!"
And so it fell out that Ivory and Waitstill walked together in the cool of the afternoon to the meeting-house on Tory Hill. Waitstill kept the beaten path on one side and Ivory that on the other, so that the width of the country road, deep in dust, was between them, yet their nearness seemed so tangible10 a thing that each could feel the heart beating in the other's side. Their talk was only that of tried friends, a talk interrupted by long beautiful silences; silences that come only to a man and woman whose understanding of each other is beyond question and answer. Not a sound broke the stillness, yet the very air, it seemed to them, was shedding meanings: the flowers were exhaling11 a love secret with their fragrances12, the birds were singing it boldly from the tree-tops, yet no word passed the man's lips or the girl's. Patty would have hung out all sorts of signals and lures13 to draw the truth from Ivory and break through the walls of his self-control, but Waitstill, never; and Ivory Boynton was made of stuff so strong that he would not speak a syllable14 of love to a woman unless he could say all. He was only five-and-twenty, but he had been reared in a rigorous school, and had learned in its poverty, loneliness, and anxiety lessons of self-denial and self-control that bore daily fruit now. He knew that Deacon Baxter would never allow any engagement to exist between Waitstill and himself; he also knew that Waitstill would never defy and disobey her father if it meant leaving her younger sister to fight alone a dreary15 battle for which she was not fitted. If there was little hope on her side there seemed even less on his. His mother's mental illness made her peculiarly dependent upon him, and at the same time held him in such strict bondage16 that it was almost impossible for him to get on in the world or even to give her the comforts she needed. In villages like Riverboro in those early days there was no putting away, even of men or women so demented as to be something of a menace to the peace of the household; but Lois Boynton was so gentle, so fragile, so exquisite17 a spirit, that she seemed in her sad aloofness18 simply a thing to be sheltered and shielded somehow in her difficult life journey. Ivory often thought how sorely she needed a daughter in her affliction. If the baby sister had only lived, the home might have been different; but alas19! there was only a son,--a son who tried to be tender and sympathetic, but after all was nothing but a big, clumsy, uncomprehending man-creature, who ought to be felling trees, ploughing, sowing, reaping, or at least studying law, making his own fortune and that of some future wife. Old Mrs. Mason, a garrulous20, good-hearted grandame, was their only near neighbor, and her visits always left his mother worse rather than better. How such a girl as Waitstill would pour comfort and beauty and joy into a lonely house like his, if only he were weak enough to call upon her strength and put it to so cruel a test. God help him, he would never do that, especially as he could not earn enough to keep a larger family, bound down as he was by inexorable responsibilities. Waitstill, thus far in life, had suffered many sorrows and enjoyed few pleasures; marriage ought to bring her freedom and plenty, not carking care and poverty. He stole long looks at the girl across the separating space that was so helpless to separate,--feeding his starved heart upon her womanly graces. Her quick, springing step was in harmony with the fire and courage of her mien21. There was a line or two in her face,--small wonder; but an "unconquerable soul" shone in her eyes; shone, too, in no uncertain way, but brightly and steadily22, expressing an unshaken joy in living. Valiant23, splendid, indomitable Waitstill! He could never tell her, alas! but how he gloried in her!
It is needless to say that no woman could be the possessor of such a love as Ivory Boynton's and not know of its existence. Waitstill never heard a breath of it from Ivory's lips; even his eyes were under control and confessed nothing; nor did his hand ever clasp hers, to show by a tell-tale touch the truth he dared not utter; nevertheless she felt that she was beloved. She hid the knowledge deep in her heart and covered it softly from every eye but her own; taking it out in the safe darkness sometimes to wonder over and adore in secret. Did her love for Ivory rest partly on a sense of vocation24?--a profound, inarticulate divining of his vast need of her? He was so strong, yet so weak because of the yoke25 he bore, so bitterly alone in his desperate struggle with life, that her heart melted like wax whenever she thought of him. When she contemplated26 the hidden mutiny in her own heart, she was awestruck sometimes at the almost divine patience of Ivory's conduct as a son.
"How is your mother this summer, Ivory?" she asked as they sat down on the meeting-house steps waiting for Jed Morrill to open the door. "There is little change in her from year to year, Waitstill.--By the way, why don't we get out of this afternoon sun and sit in the old graveyard27 under the trees? We are early and the choir won't get here for half an hour.--Dr. Perry says that he does not understand mother's case in the least, and that no one but some great Boston physician could give a proper opinion on it; of course, that is impossible at present."
They sat down on the grass underneath28 one of the elms and Waitstill took off her hat and leaned back against the tree-trunk.
"Tell me more," she said; "it is so long since we talked together quietly and we have never really spoken of your mother."
"Of course," Ivory continued, "the people of the village all think and speak of mother's illness as religious insanity29, but to me it seems nothing of the sort. I was only a child when father first fell ill with Jacob Cochrane, but I was twelve when father went away from home on his 'mission,' and if there was any one suffering from delusions30 in our family it was he, not mother. She had altogether given up going to the Cochrane meetings, and I well remember the scene when my father told her of the revelation he had received about going through the state and into New Hampshire in order to convert others and extend the movement. She had no sympathy with his self-imposed mission, you may be sure, though now she goes back in her memory to the earlier days of her married life, when she tried hard, poor soul, to tread the same path that father was treading, so as to be by his side at every turn of the road.
"I am sure" (here Ivory's tone was somewhat dry and satirical) "that father's road had many turns, Waitstill! He was a schoolmaster in Saco, you know, when I was born but he soon turned from teaching to preaching, and here my mother followed with entire sympathy, for she was intensely, devoutly31 religious. I said there was little change in her, but there is one new symptom. She has ceased to refer to her conversion32 to Cochranism as a blessed experience. Her memory of those first days seems to have faded, As to her sister's death and all the circumstances of her bringing Rodman home, her mind is a blank. Her expectation of father's return, on the other hand, is much more intense than ever."
"She must have loved your father dearly, Ivory, and to lose him in this terrible way is much worse than death. Uncle Bart says he had a great gift of language!"
"Yes, and it was that, in my mind, that led him astray. I fear that the Spirit of God was never so strong in father as the desire to influence people by his oratory33. That was what drew him to preaching in the first place, and when he found in Jacob Cochrane a man who could move an audience to frenzy34, lift them out of the body, and do with their spirits as he willed, he acknowledged him as master. Whether his gospel was a pure and undefiled religion I doubt, but he certainly was a master of mesmeric control. My mother was beguiled35, entranced, even bewitched at first, I doubt not, for she translated all that Cochrane said into her own speech, and regarded him as the prophet of a new era. But Cochrane's last 'revelations' differed from the first, and were of the earth, earthy. My mother's pure soul must have revolted, but she was not strong enough to drag father from his allegiance. Mother was of better family than father, but they were both well educated and had the best schooling36 to be had in their day. So far as I can judge, mother always had more 'balance' than father, and much better judgment,--yet look at her now!"
"Then you think it was your father's disappearance37 that really caused her mind to waver?" asked Waitstill.
"I do, indeed. I don't know what happened between them in the way of religious differences, nor how much unhappiness these may have caused. I remember she had an illness when we first came here to live and I was a little chap of three or four, but that was caused by the loss of a child, a girl, who lived only a few weeks. She recovered perfectly38, and her head was as clear as mine for a year or two after father went away. As his letters grew less frequent, as news of him gradually ceased to come, she became more and more silent, and retired39 more completely into herself. She never went anywhere, nor entertained visitors, because she did not wish to hear the gossip and speculation40 that were going on in the village. Some of it was very hard for a wife to bear, and she resented it indignantly; yet never received a word from father with which to refute it. At this time, as nearly as I can judge, she was a recluse41, and subject to periods of profound melancholy42, but nothing worse. Then she took that winter journey to her sister's deathbed, brought home the boy, and, hastened by exposure and chill and grief, I suppose, her mind gave way,--that's all!" And Ivory sighed drearily43 as he stretched himself on the greensward, and looked off towards the snow-clad New Hampshire hills. "I've meant to write the story of the 'Cochrane craze' sometime, or such part of it as has to do with my family history, and you shall read it if you like. I should set down my child-hood and my boyhood memories, together with such scraps44 of village hearsay45 as seem reliable. You were not so much younger than I, but I was in the thick of the excitement, and naturally I heard more than you, having so bitter a reason for being interested. Jacob Cochrane has altogether disappeared from public view, but there's many a family in Maine and New Hampshire, yes, and in the far West, that will feel his influence for years to come."
"I should like very much to read your account. Aunt Abby's version, for instance, is so different from Uncle Bart's that one can scarcely find the truth between the two; and father's bears no relation to that of any of the others."
"Some of us see facts and others see visions," replied Ivory, "and these differences of opinion crop up in the village every day when anything noteworthy is discussed. I came upon a quotation46 in my reading last evening that described it:
'One said it thundered... another that an angel spake'"
"Do you feel as if your father was dead, Ivory?"
"I can only hope so! That thought brings sadness with it, as one remembers his disappointment and failure, but if he is alive he is a traitor47."
There was a long pause and they could see in the distance Humphrey Barker with his clarionet and Pliny Waterhouse with his bass48 viol driving up to the churchyard fence to hitch their horses. The sun was dipping low and red behind the Town-House Hill on the other side of the river.
"What makes my father dislike the very mention of yours?" asked Waitstill. "I know what they say: that it is because the two men had high words once in a Cochrane meeting, when father tried to interfere49 with some of the exercises and was put out of doors. It doesn't seem as if that grievance50, seventeen or eighteen years ago, would influence his opinion of your mother, or of you."
"It isn't likely that a man of your father's sort would forget or forgive what he considered an injury; and in refusing to have anything to do with the son of a disgraced man and a deranged51 woman, he is well within his rights."
Ivory's cheeks burned red under the tan, and his hand trembled a little as he plucked bits of clover from the grass and pulled them to pieces absent-mindedly. "How are you getting on at home these days, Waitstill?" he asked, as if to turn his own mind and hers from a too painful subject.
"You have troubles enough of your own without hearing mine, Ivory, and anyway they are not big afflictions, heavy sorrows, like those you have to bear. Mine are just petty, nagging52, sordid53, cheap little miseries54, like gnat-bites;--so petty and so sordid that I can hardly talk to God about them, much less to a human friend. Patty is my only outlet55 and I need others, yet I find it almost impossible to escape from the narrowness of my life and be of use to any one else." The girl's voice quivered and a single tear-drop on her cheek showed that she was speaking from a full heart. "This afternoon's talk has determined56 me in one thing," she went on. "I am going to see your mother now and then. I shall have to do it secretly, for your sake, for hers, and for my own, but if I am found out, then I will go openly. There must be times when one can break the lower law, and yet keep the higher. Father's law, in this case, is the lower, and I propose to break it."
"I can't have you getting into trouble, Waitstill," Ivory objected. "You're the one woman I can think of who might help my mother; all the same, I would not make your life harder; not for worlds!"
"It will not be harder, and even if it was I should 'count it all joy' to help a woman bear such sorrow as your mother endures patiently day after day"; and Waitstill rose to her feet and tied on her hat as one who had made up her mind.
It was almost impossible for Ivory to hold his peace then, so full of gratitude57 was his soul and so great his longing58 to pour out the feeling that flooded it. He pulled himself together and led the way out of the churchyard. To look at Waitstill again would be to lose his head, but to his troubled heart there came a flood of light, a glory from that lamp that a woman may hold up for a man; a glory that none can take from him, and none can darken; a light by which he may walk and live and die.
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1
laden
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| adj.装满了的；充满了的；负了重担的；苦恼的 | |
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chattered
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| （人）喋喋不休( chatter的过去式 )； 唠叨； （牙齿）打战； （机器）震颤 | |
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magpie
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| n.喜欢收藏物品的人，喜鹊，饶舌者 | |
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hilarity
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| n.欢乐；热闹 | |
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boulder
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| n.巨砾；卵石，圆石 | |
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choir
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| n.唱诗班，唱诗班的席位，合唱团，舞蹈团；v.合唱 | |
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rehearsal
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| n.排练，排演；练习 | |
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anthem
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| n.圣歌，赞美诗，颂歌 | |
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hitch
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| v.免费搭(车旅行)；系住；急提；n.故障；急拉 | |
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10
tangible
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| adj.有形的，可触摸的，确凿的，实际的 | |
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11
exhaling
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| v.呼出，发散出( exhale的现在分词 )；吐出（肺中的空气、烟等），呼气 | |
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12
fragrances
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| n.芳香，香味( fragrance的名词复数 )；香水 | |
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13
lures
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| 吸引力，魅力（lure的复数形式） | |
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syllable
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| n.音节；vt.分音节 | |
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15
dreary
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| adj.令人沮丧的，沉闷的，单调乏味的 | |
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bondage
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| n.奴役，束缚 | |
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exquisite
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| adj.精美的；敏锐的；剧烈的，感觉强烈的 | |
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aloofness
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| 超然态度 | |
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alas
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| int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
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garrulous
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| adj.唠叨的，多话的 | |
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mien
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| n.风采；态度 | |
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22
steadily
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| adv.稳定地；不变地；持续地 | |
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23
valiant
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| adj.勇敢的，英勇的；n.勇士，勇敢的人 | |
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24
vocation
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| n.职业，行业 | |
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25
yoke
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| n.轭；支配；v.给...上轭，连接，使成配偶 | |
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26
contemplated
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| adj. 预期的 动词contemplate的过去分词形式 | |
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graveyard
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| n.坟场 | |
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underneath
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| adj.在...下面，在...底下；adv.在下面 | |
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29
insanity
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| n.疯狂，精神错乱；极端的愚蠢，荒唐 | |
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30
delusions
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| n.欺骗( delusion的名词复数 )；谬见；错觉；妄想 | |
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31
devoutly
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| adv.虔诚地，虔敬地，衷心地 | |
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conversion
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| n.转化，转换，转变 | |
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oratory
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| n.演讲术；词藻华丽的言辞 | |
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34
frenzy
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| n.疯狂，狂热，极度的激动 | |
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35
beguiled
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| v.欺骗( beguile的过去式和过去分词 )；使陶醉；使高兴；消磨（时间等） | |
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36
schooling
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| n.教育；正规学校教育 | |
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37
disappearance
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| n.消失，消散，失踪 | |
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perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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retired
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| adj.隐退的，退休的，退役的 | |
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speculation
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| n.思索，沉思；猜测；投机 | |
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recluse
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| n.隐居者 | |
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42
melancholy
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| n.忧郁，愁思；adj.令人感伤（沮丧）的，忧郁的 | |
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drearily
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| 沉寂地，厌倦地，可怕地 | |
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44
scraps
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| 油渣 | |
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45
hearsay
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| n.谣传，风闻 | |
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46
quotation
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| n.引文，引语，语录；报价，牌价，行情 | |
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47
traitor
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| n.叛徒，卖国贼 | |
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48
bass
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| n.男低音(歌手)；低音乐器；低音大提琴 | |
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49
interfere
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| v.(in)干涉，干预；(with)妨碍，打扰 | |
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50
grievance
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| n.怨愤，气恼，委屈 | |
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51
deranged
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| adj.疯狂的 | |
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52
nagging
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| adj.唠叨的，挑剔的；使人不得安宁的v.不断地挑剔或批评（某人）( nag的现在分词 )；不断地烦扰或伤害（某人）；无休止地抱怨；不断指责 | |
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53
sordid
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| adj.肮脏的，不干净的，卑鄙的，暗淡的 | |
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54
miseries
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| n.痛苦( misery的名词复数 )；痛苦的事；穷困；常发牢骚的人 | |
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55
outlet
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| n.出口/路；销路；批发商店；通风口；发泄 | |
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56
determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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57
gratitude
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| adj.感激，感谢 | |
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longing
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| n.（for）渴望 | |
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