CAMILLA left her sister to accompany Mrs. Berlinton to the Rooms, no other mode remaining for seeing Edgar, who, since her rejection1, had held back from repeating his attempt of visiting Mrs. Berlinton.
In mutual2 solicitude3, mutual watchfulness4, and mutual trials of each other’s hearts and esteem5, a week had already passed, without one hope being extirpated6, or one doubt allayed7. This evening was somewhat more, though less pleasantly decisive.
Accident, want of due consideration, and sudden recollection, in an agitated8 moment, of the worldly doctrine9 of Mrs. Arlbery, had led Camilla, once more, into the semblance10 of a character, which, without thinking of, she was acting11. Born simple and ingenuous12, and bred to hold in horror every species of art, all idea of coquetry was foreign to her meaning, though an untoward13 contrariety of circumstances, playing upon feelings too potent14 for deliberations, had eluded15 her into a conduct as mischievous16 in its effects and as wide from artlessness in its appearance, as if she had been brought up and nourished in fashionable egotism.
Such, however, was not Camilla: her every propensity17 was pure, and, when reflection came to her aid, her conduct was as exemplary as her wishes. But the ardour of her imagination, acted upon by every passing idea, shook her judgment18 from its yet unsteady seat, and left her at the mercy of wayward Sensibility-that delicate, but irregular power, which now impels19 to all that is most disinterested20 for others, now forgets all mankind, to watch the pulsations of its own fancies.
This evening brought her back to recollection.–Young Westwyn, urged by what he deemed encouragement, and prompted by his impatient father, spoke21 of his intended visit to Cleves, and introduction to Sir Hugh, in terms of such animated22 pleasure, and with a manner of such open admiration23, that she could not mistake the serious purposes which he meant to imply.
Alarmed, she looked at him; but the expression of his eyes was not such as to still her suspicions. Frightened at what now she first observed, she turned from him, gravely, meaning to avoid conversing24 with him the rest of the evening; but her caution came too late; her first civilities had flattered both him and his father into a belief of her favour, and this sudden drawback he imputed25 only to virgin26 modesty27, which but added to the fervour of his devoirs.
Camilla now perceived her own error: the perseverance28 of young Westwyn not merely startled, but appalled29 her. His character, unassuming, though spirited, was marked by a general decency30 and propriety31 of demeanour, that would not presumptuously32 brave distancing; and awakened33 her, therefore, to a review of her own conduct, as it related or as it might seem, to himself.
And here, not all the guiltlessness of her intentions could exonerate34 her from blame with that finely scrutinizing35 monitor to which Heaven, in pity to those evil propensities36 that law cannot touch, nor society reclaim37, has devolved its earthly jurisdiction38 in the human breast. With her hopes she could play, with her wishes she could trifle, her intentions she could defend, her designs she could relinquish39-but with her conscience she could not combat. It pointed40 beyond the present moment; it took her back to her imprudence with Sir Sedley Clarendel, which should have taught her more circumspection41; and it carried her on to the disappointment of Henry and his father, whom while heedlessly she had won, though without the most remote view to beguile42, she might seem artfully to have caught, for the wanton vanity of rejecting.
While advice and retrospection were thus alike oppressive in accusation44, her pensive45 air and withdrawn46 smiles proved but more endearing to young Westwyn, whose internal interpretation47 was so little adapted to render them formidable, that his assiduities were but more tender, and allowed her no repose48.
Edgar, who with the most suffering suspense49, observed her unusual seriousness, and its effect upon Henry, drew from it, with the customary ingenuity50 of sensitive minds to torment51 themselves, the same inference for his causeless torture, as proved to his rival a delusive52 blessing53. But while thus he contemplated54 Henry as the most to be envied of mortals, a new scene called forth55 new surprise, and gave birth to yet new doubts in his mind. He saw Camilla not merely turn wholly away from his rival, but enter into conversation, and give, apparently56, her whole attention to Lord Valhurst, who, it was palpable, only spoke to her of her charms, which, alternately with those of Mrs. Berlinton, he devoted57 his whole time to worshipping.
Camilla by this action, meant simply to take the quickest road she saw in her power to shew young Westwyn his mistake. Lord Valhurst she held nearly in aversion; for, though his vindication58 of his upright motives59 at the bathing-house, joined to her indifference60 in considering him either guilty or innocent, made her conclude he might be blameless in that transaction, his perpetual compliments, enforced by staring eyes and tender glances, wearied and disgusted her. But he was always by her side, when not in the same position with Mrs. Berlinton; and while his readiness to engage her made this her easiest expedient61, his time of life persuaded her it was the safest. Little aware of the effect this produced upon Edgar, she imagined he would not more notice her in any conversation with Lord Valhurst, than if she were discoursing62 with her uncle.
But while she judged from the sincerity63 of reality, she thought not of the mischief64 of appearance. What in her was designed with innocence65, was rendered suspicious to the observers by the looks and manner of her companion. The pleasure with which he found, at last, that incense66 received, which hitherto had been slighted, gave new zest67 to an adulation which, while Camilla endured merely to shew her coldness to young Westwyn, seemed to Edgar to be offered with a gross presumption68 of welcome, that must result from an opinion it was addressed to a confirmed coquette.
Offended in his inmost soul by this idea, he scarce desired to know if she were now stimulated69 most by a wish to torment Henry, or himself, or only by the general pleasure she found in this new mode of amusement. ‘Be it,’ cried he, to Dr. Marchmont, ‘as it may, with me all is equally over! I seek not to recall an attachment70 liable to such intermissions, such commotions71. What would be my peace, my tranquillity72, with a companion so unstable73? A mind all at large in its pursuits?-a dissipated wife! No!–I will remain here but to let her know I acquiesce74 in her dismission, and to learn in what form she has communicated our breach75 to her friends.’
Dr. Marchmont was silent, and they walked out of the room together; leaving the deceived Camilla persuaded he was so indifferent with regard to the old peer, that all her influence was lost, and all her late exertions76 were thrown away, by one evening’s remissness77 in exciting his fears of a young rival.
* * *
Melmond returned to Southampton the next morning with an air of deep and settled melancholy78. He had found the two brothers together, and the candour of his appearance, the plainness of his declaration, the openness with which he stated his situation, and his near relationship to Mrs. Berlinton, procured79 him a courteous80 hearing; and he soon saw that both the father and the uncle, though they desired time for consideration and inquiry81, were disposed to favour him. Mr. Tyrold, though, to his acknowledged recent disappointment of fortune, he attributed his address, had so little hope that any man at once amiable82 and rich would present himself to his unfortunate Eugenia, that, when he saw a gentleman well educated, well allied83, of pleasing manners, and with every external promise of a good and feeling character, modestly, and with no professions but of esteem and respect, seek her of her friends, he thought himself not even entitled to refuse him. He told him, however, that he could conclude upon nothing in a matter of such equal interest to himself and his wife, without her knowledge and concurrence84; and that during the time he demanded before he gave a final answer, he required a forbearance of all intercourse85, beyond that of a common acquaintance. His first design was immediately to send for Eugenia home; but the young man appeared so reasonable, so mild, so unlike a fortune-hunter, that, constitutionally indulgent where he apprehended86 nothing criminal, he contented87 himself with writing to the same effect to Eugenia, fully43 satisfied of her scrupulous88 punctuality when once his will was known.
Melmond, though thus well received, returned back to Southampton with any air rather than that of a bridegroom. The order, not to wait upon Eugenia in private, was the only part of his task he performed with satisfaction; for though a mind really virtuous89 made him wish to conquer his repugnance90 to his future partner he felt it could not be by comparing her with Indiana.
Eugenia received the letter of her father, written in his own and her uncle’s name, with transport; and, to testify her grateful obedience91, resolved to name the impending92 transaction to no one, and even to relinquish her visits to Mrs. Berlinton, and only to see Melmond when accident brought him before her in public.
But Mrs. Mittin, through words casually93 dropt, or conversations not very delicately overheard, soon gathered the particulars of her situation, which happily furnished her with a new subject for a gossiping visit to Miss Margland and Indiana. The first of these ladies received the news with unconcern, rather pleased than otherwise, that the temptation of an heiress should be removed from any rivalry94 with the charms of her fair pupil; who, by no means, however, listened to the account with equal indifference. The sight of Melmond at Southampton, with the circumstance of his being brother to the Honourable95 Mrs. Berlinton, had awakened all the pleasure with which she had first met his impassioned admiration; and while she haughtily96 expected from every public exhibition, ‘to bring home hearts by dozens,’ the secret point she had in view, was shewing Melmond that her power over others was as mighty97 as it had been over himself She had not taken the trouble to ask with what end: what was passed never afforded her an observation; what was to come never called forth an idea. Occupied only by the present moment, things gone remained upon her memory but as matters of fact, and all her expectations she looked forward to but as matters of course. To lose, therefore, a conquest she had thought the victim of her beauty for life, was a surprise nearly incredible; to lose him to Eugenia an affront98 scarcely supportable-and she waited but an opportunity to kill him with her disdain99. But Melmond, who dreaded100 nothing so much as an interview, availed himself of the commands of Mr. Tyrold, in not going to the lodgings101 of Eugenia, and lived absorbed in a melancholy retirement102, which books alone could a little alleviate103.
The conclusion of the letter of Mr. Tyrold gave to Camilla as much pain as every other part of it gave to Eugenia pleasure: it was an earnest and parentally tender prayer, that the alliance with Melmond, should his worth appear such as to authorise its taking place, might prove the counterpart to the happiness so sweetly promised from that of her sister with Edgar.
While Camilla sighed to consider how wide from the certainty with which he mentioned it was such an event, she blushed that he should thus be uninformed of her insecurity: but while a reconciliation104 was not more her hope than her expectation with every rising sun, she could not endure to break his repose with the knowledge of a suspense she thought as disgraceful as it was unhappy. Yet her present scheme to accelerate its termination, became difficult even of trial.
The obviously serious regard of Henry was a continual reproach to her; and the undisguised approbation105 of his father was equally painful. Yet she could now only escape them by turning to some other, and that other was necessarily Lord Valhurst, whose close siege to her notice forced off every assailant but himself. This the deluded106 Camilla thought an expedient the most innoxious; and gave to him so much of her time, that his susceptibility to the charms of youth and beauty was put to a trial beyond his fortitude107; and, in a very few days, notwithstanding their disproportion in age, his embarrassed though large estates, and the little or no fortune which she had in view, he determined108 to marry her: for when a man of rank and riches resolves to propose himself to a woman who has neither, he conceives his acceptance not a matter of doubt.
In any other society, his admiration of Camilla might easily, like what he had already experienced and forgotten for thousands of her sex, have escaped so grave or decided109 a tendency; but in Mrs. Berlinton he saw so much of youth and beauty bestowed110 upon a man whom he knew to be his own senior in age, that the idea of a handsome young wife was perpetually present to him. He weighed, like all people who seek to entice111 themselves to their own wishes, but one side of the question; and risked, like all who succeed in such self-seduction, the inconvenience of finding out the other side too late. He saw the attractions of his fair kinswoman; but neglected to consider of how little avail they were to her husband; he thought, with exultation112 of that husband’s age, and almost childishness; but forgot to take into the scales, that they had obtained from his youthful choice only disgust and avoidance.
While he waited for some trinkets, which he had ordered from town, to have ready for presenting with his proposals, Edgar only sought an opportunity and courage to take his last farewell. Whenever Camilla was so much engaged with others that it was impossible to approach her, he thought himself capable of uttering an eternal adieu; but when, by any opening, he saw where and how he might address her, his feet refused to move, his tongue became parched113, and his pleading heart seemed exclaiming: O, not to-night! yet, yet, another day, ere Camilla is parted with for ever!
But suddenly, soon after, Camilla ceased to appear. At the rooms, at the plays, at the balls, and at the private assemblies, Edgar looked for her in vain. Her old adulator114, also, vanished from public places, while her young admirer and his father hovered115 about in them as usual, but spiritless, comfortless, and as if in the same search as himself.
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1
rejection
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| n.拒绝，被拒，抛弃，被弃 | |
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mutual
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| adj.相互的，彼此的；共同的，共有的 | |
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solicitude
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| n.焦虑 | |
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watchfulness
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| 警惕，留心； 警觉（性） | |
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esteem
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| n.尊敬，尊重；vt.尊重，敬重；把…看作 | |
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extirpated
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| v.消灭，灭绝( extirpate的过去式和过去分词 )；根除 | |
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allayed
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| v.减轻，缓和( allay的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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agitated
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| adj.被鼓动的，不安的 | |
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doctrine
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| n.教义；主义；学说 | |
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semblance
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| n.外貌，外表 | |
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acting
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| n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的 | |
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ingenuous
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| adj.纯朴的，单纯的；天真的；坦率的 | |
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untoward
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| adj.不利的，不幸的，困难重重的 | |
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potent
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| adj.强有力的，有权势的；有效力的 | |
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eluded
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| v.（尤指机敏地）避开( elude的过去式和过去分词 )；逃避；躲避；使达不到 | |
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mischievous
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| adj.调皮的，恶作剧的，有害的，伤人的 | |
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propensity
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| n.倾向；习性 | |
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judgment
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| n.审判；判断力，识别力，看法，意见 | |
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impels
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| v.推动、推进或敦促某人做某事( impel的第三人称单数 ) | |
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disinterested
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| adj.不关心的，不感兴趣的 | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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animated
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| adj.生气勃勃的，活跃的，愉快的 | |
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admiration
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| n.钦佩，赞美，羡慕 | |
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conversing
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| v.交谈，谈话( converse的现在分词 ) | |
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imputed
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| v.把（错误等）归咎于( impute的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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virgin
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| n.处女，未婚女子；adj.未经使用的；未经开发的 | |
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modesty
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| n.谦逊，虚心，端庄，稳重，羞怯，朴素 | |
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perseverance
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| n.坚持不懈，不屈不挠 | |
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appalled
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| v.使惊骇，使充满恐惧( appall的过去式和过去分词)adj.惊骇的；丧胆的 | |
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decency
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| n.体面，得体，合宜，正派，庄重 | |
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propriety
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| n.正当行为；正当；适当 | |
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presumptuously
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| adv.自以为是地，专横地，冒失地 | |
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awakened
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| v.（使）醒( awaken的过去式和过去分词 )；（使）觉醒；弄醒；（使）意识到 | |
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exonerate
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| v.免除责任，确定无罪 | |
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scrutinizing
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| v.仔细检查，详审( scrutinize的现在分词 ) | |
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propensities
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| n.倾向，习性( propensity的名词复数 ) | |
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reclaim
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| v.要求归还，收回；开垦 | |
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jurisdiction
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| n.司法权，审判权，管辖权，控制权 | |
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relinquish
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| v.放弃，撤回，让与，放手 | |
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pointed
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| adj.尖的，直截了当的 | |
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circumspection
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| n.细心，慎重 | |
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beguile
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| vt.欺骗，消遣 | |
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fully
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| adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地 | |
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accusation
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| n.控告，指责，谴责 | |
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pensive
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| a.沉思的,哀思的,忧沉的 | |
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withdrawn
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| vt.收回；使退出；vi.撤退，退出 | |
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interpretation
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| n.解释，说明，描述；艺术处理 | |
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repose
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| v.(使)休息；n.安息 | |
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suspense
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| n.（对可能发生的事）紧张感，担心，挂虑 | |
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ingenuity
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| n.别出心裁；善于发明创造 | |
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torment
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| n.折磨；令人痛苦的东西(人)；vt.折磨；纠缠 | |
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delusive
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| adj.欺骗的，妄想的 | |
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blessing
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| n.祈神赐福；祷告；祝福，祝愿 | |
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contemplated
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| adj. 预期的 动词contemplate的过去分词形式 | |
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forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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apparently
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| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
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devoted
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| adj.忠诚的，忠实的，热心的，献身于...的 | |
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vindication
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| n.洗冤，证实 | |
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motives
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| n.动机，目的( motive的名词复数 ) | |
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indifference
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| n.不感兴趣，不关心，冷淡，不在乎 | |
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expedient
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| adj.有用的，有利的；n.紧急的办法，权宜之计 | |
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discoursing
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| 演说（discourse的现在分词形式） | |
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sincerity
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| n.真诚，诚意；真实 | |
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mischief
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| n.损害，伤害，危害；恶作剧，捣蛋，胡闹 | |
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innocence
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| n.无罪；天真；无害 | |
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incense
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| v.激怒；n.香，焚香时的烟，香气 | |
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zest
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| n.乐趣；滋味，风味；兴趣 | |
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presumption
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| n.推测，可能性，冒昧，放肆，[法律]推定 | |
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stimulated
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| a.刺激的 | |
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attachment
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| n.附属物，附件；依恋；依附 | |
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commotions
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| n.混乱，喧闹，骚动( commotion的名词复数 ) | |
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tranquillity
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| n. 平静, 安静 | |
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unstable
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| adj.不稳定的，易变的 | |
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acquiesce
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| vi.默许，顺从，同意 | |
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breach
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| n.违反，不履行；破裂；vt.冲破，攻破 | |
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exertions
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| n.努力( exertion的名词复数 )；费力；（能力、权力等的）运用；行使 | |
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remissness
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| n.玩忽职守；马虎；怠慢；不小心 | |
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melancholy
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| n.忧郁，愁思；adj.令人感伤（沮丧）的，忧郁的 | |
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procured
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| v.（努力）取得， （设法）获得( procure的过去式和过去分词 )；拉皮条 | |
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courteous
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| adj.彬彬有礼的，客气的 | |
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inquiry
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| n.打听，询问，调查，查问 | |
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amiable
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| adj.和蔼可亲的，友善的，亲切的 | |
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allied
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| adj.协约国的；同盟国的 | |
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concurrence
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| n.同意；并发 | |
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intercourse
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| n.性交；交流，交往，交际 | |
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apprehended
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| 逮捕，拘押( apprehend的过去式和过去分词 )； 理解 | |
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contented
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| adj.满意的，安心的，知足的 | |
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scrupulous
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| adj.审慎的，小心翼翼的，完全的，纯粹的 | |
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virtuous
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| adj.有品德的，善良的，贞洁的，有效力的 | |
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repugnance
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| n.嫌恶 | |
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obedience
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| n.服从，顺从 | |
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impending
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| a.imminent, about to come or happen | |
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casually
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| adv.漠不关心地，无动于衷地，不负责任地 | |
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rivalry
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| n.竞争，竞赛，对抗 | |
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honourable
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| adj.可敬的；荣誉的，光荣的 | |
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haughtily
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| adv. 傲慢地, 高傲地 | |
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mighty
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| adj.强有力的；巨大的 | |
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affront
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| n./v.侮辱，触怒 | |
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disdain
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| n.鄙视，轻视；v.轻视，鄙视，不屑 | |
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dreaded
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| adj.令人畏惧的；害怕的v.害怕，恐惧，担心( dread的过去式和过去分词) | |
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lodgings
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| n. 出租的房舍, 寄宿舍 | |
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retirement
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| n.退休，退职 | |
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alleviate
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| v.减轻，缓和，缓解(痛苦等) | |
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reconciliation
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| n.和解，和谐，一致 | |
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approbation
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| n.称赞；认可 | |
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deluded
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| v.欺骗，哄骗( delude的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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fortitude
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| n.坚忍不拔；刚毅 | |
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determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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decided
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| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
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bestowed
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| 赠给，授予( bestow的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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entice
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| v.诱骗，引诱，怂恿 | |
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exultation
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| n.狂喜，得意 | |
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parched
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| adj.焦干的；极渴的；v.（使）焦干 | |
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adulator
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| n.好奉承的人 | |
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hovered
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| 鸟( hover的过去式和过去分词 )； 靠近（某事物）； （人）徘徊； 犹豫 | |
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