She made no movement of either surprise or of joy; she was joy itself. That simple question, "And Cosette?" was put with so profound a faith, with so much certainty, with such a complete absence of disquiet1 and of doubt, that he found not a word of reply. She continued:--
"I knew that you were there. I was asleep, but I saw you. I have seen you for a long, long time. I have been following you with my eyes all night long. You were in a glory, and you had around you all sorts of celestial2 forms."
He raised his glance to the crucifix.
"But," she resumed, "tell me where Cosette is. Why did not you place her on my bed against the moment of my waking?"
He made some mechanical reply which he was never afterwards able to recall.
Fortunately, the doctor had been warned, and he now made his appearance. He came to the aid of M. Madeleine.
"Calm yourself, my child," said the doctor; "your child is here."
Fantine's eyes beamed and filled her whole face with light. She clasped her hands with an expression which contained all that is possible to prayer in the way of violence and tenderness.
"Oh!" she exclaimed, "bring her to me!"
Touching3 illusion of a mother! Cosette was, for her, still the little child who is carried.
"Not yet," said the doctor, "not just now. You still have some fever. The sight of your child would agitate4 you and do you harm. You must be cured first."
She interrupted him impetuously:--
"But I am cured! Oh, I tell you that I am cured! What an ass5 that doctor is! The idea! I want to see my child!"
"You see," said the doctor, "how excited you become. So long as you are in this state I shall oppose your having your child. It is not enough to see her; it is necessary that you should live for her. When you are reasonable, I will bring her to you myself."
The poor mother bowed her head.
"I beg your pardon, doctor, I really beg your pardon. Formerly6 I should never have spoken as I have just done; so many misfortunes have happened to me, that I sometimes do not know what I am saying. I understand you; you fear the emotion. I will wait as long as you like, but I swear to you that it would not have harmed me to see my daughter. I have been seeing her; I have not taken my eyes from her since yesterday evening. Do you know? If she were brought to me now, I should talk to her very gently. That is all. Is it not quite natural that I should desire to see my daughter, who has been brought to me expressly from Montfermeil? I am not angry. I know well that I am about to be happy. All night long I have seen white things, and persons who smiled at me. When Monsieur le Docteur pleases, he shall bring me Cosette. I have no longer any fever; I am well. I am perfectly8 conscious that there is nothing the matter with me any more; but I am going to behave as though I were ill, and not stir, to please these ladies here. When it is seen that I am very calm, they will say, `She must have her child.'"
M. Madeleine was sitting on a chair beside the bed. She turned towards him; she was making a visible effort to be calm and "very good," as she expressed it in the feebleness of illness which resembles infancy9, in order that, seeing her so peaceable, they might make no difficulty about bringing Cosette to her. But while she controlled herself she could not refrain from questioning M. Madeleine.
"Did you have a pleasant trip, Monsieur le Maire? Oh! how good you were to go and get her for me! Only tell me how she is. Did she stand the journey well? Alas10! she will not recognize me. She must have forgotten me by this time, poor darling! Children have no memories. They are like birds. A child sees one thing to-day and another thing to-morrow, and thinks of nothing any longer. And did she have white linen11? Did those Thenardiers keep her clean? How have they fed her? Oh! if you only knew how I have suffered, putting such questions as that to myself during all the time of my wretchedness. Now, it is all past. I am happy. Oh, how I should like to see her! Do you think her pretty, Monsieur le Maire? Is not my daughter beautiful? You must have been very cold in that diligence! Could she not be brought for just one little instant? She might be taken away directly afterwards. Tell me; you are the master; it could be so if you chose!"
He took her hand. "Cosette is beautiful," he said, "Cosette is well. You shall see her soon; but calm yourself; you are talking with too much vivacity12, and you are throwing your arms out from under the clothes, and that makes you cough."
In fact, fits of coughing interrupted Fantine at nearly every word.
Fantine did not murmur13; she feared that she had injured by her too passionate14 lamentations the confidence which she was desirous of inspiring, and she began to talk of indifferent things.
"Montfermeil is quite pretty, is it not? People go there on pleasure parties in summer. Are the Thenardiers prosperous? There are not many travellers in their parts. That inn of theirs is a sort of a cook-shop."
M. Madeleine was still holding her hand, and gazing at her with anxiety; it was evident that he had come to tell her things before which his mind now hesitated. The doctor, having finished his visit, retired15. Sister Simplice remained alone with them.
But in the midst of this pause Fantine exclaimed:--
"I hear her! mon Dieu, I hear her!"
She stretched out her arm to enjoin16 silence about her, held her breath, and began to listen with rapture17.
There was a child playing in the yard--the child of the portress or of some work-woman. It was one of those accidents which are always occurring, and which seem to form a part of the mysterious stage-setting of mournful scenes. The child--a little girl-- was going and coming, running to warm herself, laughing, singing at the top of her voice. Alas! in what are the plays of children not intermingled. It was this little girl whom Fantine heard singing.
"Oh!" she resumed, "it is my Cosette! I recognize her voice."
The child retreated as it had come; the voice died away. Fantine listened for a while longer, then her face clouded over, and M. Madeleine heard her say, in a low voice: "How wicked that doctor is not to allow me to see my daughter! That man has an evil countenance18, that he has."
But the smiling background of her thoughts came to the front again. She continued to talk to herself, with her head resting on the pillow: "How happy we are going to be! We shall have a little garden the very first thing; M. Madeleine has promised it to me. My daughter will play in the garden. She must know her letters by this time. I will make her spell. She will run over the grass after butterflies. I will watch her. Then she will take her first communion. Ah! When will she take her first communion?"
She began to reckon on her fingers.
"One, two, three, four--she is seven years old. In five years she will have a white veil, and openwork stockings; she will look like a little woman. O my good sister, you do not know how foolish I become when I think of my daughter's first communion!"
She began to laugh.
He had released Fantine's hand. He listened to her words as one listens to the sighing of the breeze, with his eyes on the ground, his mind absorbed in reflection which had no bottom. All at once she ceased speaking, and this caused him to raise his head mechanically. Fantine had become terrible.
She no longer spoke7, she no longer breathed; she had raised herself to a sitting posture19, her thin shoulder emerged from her chemise; her face, which had been radiant but a moment before, was ghastly, and she seemed to have fixed20 her eyes, rendered large with terror, on something alarming at the other extremity21 of the room.
"Good God!" he exclaimed; "what ails22 you, Fantine?"
She made no reply; she did not remove her eyes from the object which she seemed to see. She removed one hand from his arm, and with the other made him a sign to look behind him.
He turned, and beheld23 Javert.
她既没有惊讶的动作,也没有欢乐的动作,她便是欢乐的本身。她提出“珂赛特呢?”这个简单问题时,她的信心是那样真诚、那样坚定、那样绝无一丝疑虑,致使他不知道怎样回答才好。
她继续说:
“我知道您到那里去过了。我睡着了,但是我看见了您。我早已看见了您。我的眼睛跟着您走了一整夜。一道神光围绕着您,在您的前后左右有各式各样的天仙。”
他抬起眼睛望着那个耶稣受难像。
“不过,”她又说,“请您告诉我珂赛特在哪里?为什么我醒来时,没有把她放在我的床上呢?”
他机械地回答了几句,过后他从来没有回忆起他当时说的是什么。
幸而有人通知了医生,他赶来了。他来帮助马德兰先生。“我的孩子,”医生说,“好好安静下来,您的孩子在这里了。”
芳汀顿时两眼炯炯发光,喜溢眉宇。双手合十,这种神情具有祈祷所能包含的最强烈而同时又最柔和的一切情感。
“呵,”她喊道,“把她抱来给我吧!”
多么动人的慈母的幻想!珂赛特对她来说始终是个抱在怀里的孩子。
“还不行,”那医生接着说,“现在还不行。您的热还没有退净。您看见孩子,会兴奋,会影响您的身体。非先把您的病养好不成。”
她焦急地岔着说:
“可是我的病已经好了!他真是头驴子,这医生!呀!我要看我的孩子,我!”
“您瞧,”医生说,“您多么容易动气。如果您永远这样,我便永远不许您见您的孩子。单看见她并不解决问题,您还得为她活下去才是。等到您不胡闹了,我亲自把她带来给您。”
可怜的母亲低下了头。
“医生先生,我请您原谅,我诚心诚意请您特别原谅。从前我决说不出刚才的那种话。我受的痛苦太多了,以至于我有时会不知道自己说什么。我懂,您担心情绪激动,您愿意我等多久我就等多久,但是我向您发誓,看看我的女儿对我是不会有害处的。我随时都看见她,从昨天晚上起,我的眼睛便没有离开过她。你们知道吗?你们现在把她抱来给我,我就可以好好地和她谈心。除此以外,不会再有什么的。人家特地到孟费郿去把我的孩子领来,我要看看她,这不是很自然的吗?我没有发脾气。我完全明白,我的快乐就在眼前。整整一夜,我看见一些洁白的东西,还有些人向我微笑。在医生先生高兴时,就可以把我的珂赛特抱给我。我已不发烧了,我的病早已好了,我心里明白我完全好了,但是我要装出有病的样子,一动也不动,这样才可以让这儿的女士们高兴。别人看见我安静下来,就会说:‘现在应当给她孩子了。’”
马德兰先生当时坐在床边的一张椅子上。她把脸转过去朝着他,她明明是要极力显出安静和“乖乖的”样子,正如她在这种类似稚气的病态里所说的,她的目的是要使人看到她平静了,便不再为难,把珂赛特送给她。但是她尽管强自镇静,但还是忍不住要向马德兰先生问东问西。
“您一路上都好吧,市长先生?呵!您多么慈悲,为了我去找她!您只告诉我她是什么样子就够了。她一路来,没有太辛苦吧?可怜!她一定不认识我了!这么多年,她已经忘记我了,可怜的心肝!孩子们总是没有记性的。就和小鸟一样。今天看见这,明天看见那,结果一样也想不起来。至少她的换洗衣服总是白的吧?那德纳第家的总注意到她的清洁了吧?他们给她吃什么东西?呵!我从前在受难时,想到这些事心里多么痛苦,假使你们知道!现在这些事都已过去了。我已放心了。呵!我多么想看她!市长先生,您觉得她漂亮吗?我的女儿生得美,不是吗?你们在车子里没有受凉吧!你们让她到这儿来待一会儿也不成吗?你们可以立刻又把她带出去。请您说!您是主人,假使您愿意的话!”
他握住她的手:
“珂赛特生得美,”他说,“珂赛特的身体也好,您不久就可以看见她,但是您应当安静一点。您说得太兴奋了,您又把手伸到床外边来了,您会咳嗽的。”
的确,芳汀几乎说一字就要剧烈地咳一次。
芳汀并不罗嗦,她恐怕说得太激烈,反而把事情搞坏,得不到别人的好感,因此她只谈一些不相干的话。
“孟费郿这地方还好,不是吗?到了夏天,有些人到那地方去游玩。德纳第家的生意好吗?在他们那地方来往的人并不多。那种客店也只能算是一种歇马店罢了。”
马德兰先生始终捏着她的手,望着她发愁,他当时去看她,显然是有事要和她谈,但是现在迟疑起来了。医生诊视了一回,也退出去了。只有散普丽斯姆姆在他们旁边。
当大家默默无声时,芳汀忽然叫起来:
“我听到了她的声音!我的上帝!我听到了她的声音!”
她伸出手臂,叫大家静下去,她屏着气,听得心往神驰。
这时,正有一个孩子在天井里玩,看门婆婆的孩子,或是随便一个女工的孩子。我们时常会遇到一些巧合的事,每逢人到山穷水尽时,这类事便会从冥冥之中出来凑上一脚,天井里的那个孩子便是这种巧遇之一。那孩子是个小姑娘,为了取暖,在那儿跑来跑去,高声笑着、唱着。唉!在什么东西里没有孩童的游戏!芳汀听见唱的便是这小姑娘。
“呵!”她又说,“这是我的珂赛特!我听得出她的嗓子!”
这孩子忽来忽去,走远了,她的声音也消失了。芳汀又听了一会,面容惨淡,马德兰先生听见她低声说:
“医生不许我见我的女儿,多么心狠!他真有一副坏样子!”
然而她心中欢乐的本源又出现了。她头在枕上,继续向自己说,“我们将来多么快乐呵!首先,我们有个小花园!这是马德兰先生许给我的。我的女儿在花园里玩!现在她应当认识字母了吧。我来教她拼字。她在草地上追蝴蝶。我看她玩。过后她就要去领第一次圣礼。呀!真的!她应当几时去领她的第一次圣礼呢?”
她翘起手指来数。
“……一,二,三,四,……她七岁了。再过五年。她披上一条白纱,穿上一双挑花袜,一副大姑娘的神气。呵!我的好姆姆,您不知道我多么蠢,我已想到我女儿领第一次圣礼的事了!”
她笑起来了。
他已丢了芳汀的手。他听着这些话,如同一个人听着风声,眼睛望着地,精神沉溺在无边的萦想里一样。忽然一下,她不说话了,他机械地抬起头来,芳汀神色大变。
她不再说话,也不再呼吸,她半卧半起,支在床上,瘦削的肩膀也从睡衣里露出来,刚才还喜气盈盈的面色,现在发青了,恐怖使她的眼睛睁得滴圆,好象注视着她前面、她屋子那一头的一件骇人的东西。
“我的上帝!”他喊道,“您怎么了,芳汀?”
她不回答,她的眼睛毫不离开她那仿佛看见的东西,她用一只手握住他的胳膊,用另一只手指着,叫他朝后看。
他转过头去,看见了沙威。
1 disquiet | |
n.担心,焦虑 | |
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2 celestial | |
adj.天体的;天上的 | |
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3 touching | |
adj.动人的,使人感伤的 | |
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4 agitate | |
vi.(for,against)煽动,鼓动;vt.搅动 | |
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5 ass | |
n.驴;傻瓜,蠢笨的人 | |
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6 formerly | |
adv.从前,以前 | |
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7 spoke | |
n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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8 perfectly | |
adv.完美地,无可非议地,彻底地 | |
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9 infancy | |
n.婴儿期;幼年期;初期 | |
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10 alas | |
int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
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11 linen | |
n.亚麻布,亚麻线,亚麻制品;adj.亚麻布制的,亚麻的 | |
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12 vivacity | |
n.快活,活泼,精神充沛 | |
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13 murmur | |
n.低语,低声的怨言;v.低语,低声而言 | |
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14 passionate | |
adj.热情的,热烈的,激昂的,易动情的,易怒的,性情暴躁的 | |
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15 retired | |
adj.隐退的,退休的,退役的 | |
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16 enjoin | |
v.命令;吩咐;禁止 | |
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17 rapture | |
n.狂喜;全神贯注;着迷;v.使狂喜 | |
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18 countenance | |
n.脸色,面容;面部表情;vt.支持,赞同 | |
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19 posture | |
n.姿势,姿态,心态,态度;v.作出某种姿势 | |
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20 fixed | |
adj.固定的,不变的,准备好的;(计算机)固定的 | |
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21 extremity | |
n.末端,尽头;尽力;终极;极度 | |
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22 ails | |
v.生病( ail的第三人称单数 );感到不舒服;处境困难;境况不佳 | |
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23 beheld | |
v.看,注视( behold的过去式和过去分词 );瞧;看呀;(叙述中用于引出某人意外的出现)哎哟 | |
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