Don Quixote’s bread would not bake, as the common saying is, until he had heard and learned the curious things promised by the man who carried the arms. He went to seek him where the innkeeper said be was and having found him, bade him say now at any rate what he had to say in answer to the question he had asked him on the road. “The tale of my wonders must be taken more leisurely1 and not standing2,” said the man; “let me finish foddering3 my beast, good sir; and then I’ll tell you things that will astonish you.”
“Don’t wait for that,” said Don Quixote; “I’ll help you in everything,” and so he did, sifting4 the barley5 for him and cleaning out the manger; a degree of humility6 which made the other feel bound to tell him with a good grace what he had asked; so seating himself on a bench, with Don Quixote beside him, and the cousin, the page, Sancho Panza, and the landlord, for a senate and an audience, he began his story in this way:
“You must know that in a village four leagues and a half from this inn, it so happened that one of the regidors, by the tricks and roguery of a servant girl of his (it’s too long a tale to tell), lost an ass7; and though he did all he possibly could to find it, it was all to no purpose. A fortnight might have gone by, so the story goes, since the ass had been missing, when, as the regidor who had lost it was standing in the plaza8, another regidor of the same town said to him, ‘Pay me for good news, gossip; your ass has turned up.’ ‘That I will, and well, gossip,’ said the other; ‘but tell us, where has he turned up?’ ‘In the forest,’ said the finder; ‘I saw him this morning without pack-saddle or harness of any sort, and so lean that it went to one’s heart to see him. I tried to drive him before me and bring him to you, but he is already so wild and shy that when I went near him he made off into the thickest part of the forest. If you have a mind that we two should go back and look for him, let me put up this she-ass at my house and I’ll be back at once.’ ‘You will be doing me a great kindness,’ said the owner of the ass, ‘and I’ll try to pay it back in the same coin.’ It is with all these circumstances, and in the very same way I am telling it now, that those who know all about the matter tell the story. Well then, the two regidors set off on foot, arm in arm, for the forest, and coming to the place where they hoped to find the ass they could not find him, nor was he to be seen anywhere about, search as they might. Seeing, then, that there was no sign of him, the regidor who had seen him said to the other, ‘Look here, gossip; a plan has occurred to me, by which, beyond a doubt, we shall manage to discover the animal, even if he is stowed away in the bowels9 of the earth, not to say the forest. Here it is. I can bray10 to perfection, and if you can ever so little, the thing’s as good as done.’ ‘Ever so little did you say, gossip?’ said the other; ‘by God, I’ll not give in to anybody, not even to the asses11 themselves.’ ‘We’ll soon see,’ said the second regidor, ‘for my plan is that you should go one side of the forest, and I the other, so as to go all round about it; and every now and then you will bray and I will bray; and it cannot be but that the ass will hear us, and answer us if he is in the forest.’ To which the owner of the ass replied, ‘It’s an excellent plan, I declare, gossip, and worthy12 of your great genius;’ and the two separating as agreed, it so fell out that they brayed13 almost at the same moment, and each, deceived by the braying14 of the other, ran to look, fancying the ass had turned up at last. When they came in sight of one another, said the loser, ‘Is it possible, gossip, that it was not my ass that brayed?’ ‘No, it was I,’ said the other. ‘Well then, I can tell you, gossip,’ said the ass’s owner, ‘that between you and an ass there is not an atom of difference as far as braying goes, for I never in all my life saw or heard anything more natural.’ ‘Those praises and compliments belong to you more justly than to me, gossip,’ said the inventor of the plan; ‘for, by the God that made me, you might give a couple of brays15 odds16 to the best and most finished brayer in the world; the tone you have got is deep, your voice is well kept up as to time and pitch, and your finishing notes come thick and fast; in fact, I own myself beaten, and yield the palm to you, and give in to you in this rare accomplishment17.’ ‘Well then,’ said the owner, ‘I’ll set a higher value on myself for the future, and consider that I know something, as I have an excellence18 of some sort; for though I always thought I brayed well, I never supposed I came up to the pitch of perfection you say.’ ‘And I say too,’ said the second, ‘that there are rare gifts going to loss in the world, and that they are ill bestowed19 upon those who don’t know how to make use of them.’ ‘Ours,’ said the owner of the ass, ‘unless it is in cases like this we have now in hand, cannot be of any service to us, and even in this God grant they may be of some use.’ So saying they separated, and took to their braying once more, but every instant they were deceiving one another, and coming to meet one another again, until they arranged by way of countersign20, so as to know that it was they and not the ass, to give two brays, one after the other. In this way, doubling the brays at every step, they made the complete circuit of the forest, but the lost ass never gave them an answer or even the sign of one. How could the poor ill-starred brute21 have answered, when, in the thickest part of the forest, they found him devoured22 by wolves? As soon as he saw him his owner said, ‘I was wondering he did not answer, for if he wasn’t dead he’d have brayed when he heard us, or he’d have been no ass; but for the sake of having heard you bray to such perfection, gossip, I count the trouble I have taken to look for him well bestowed, even though I have found him dead.’ ‘It’s in a good hand, gossip,’ said the other; ‘if the abbot sings well, the acolyte23 is not much behind him.’ So they returned disconsolate24 and hoarse25 to their village, where they told their friends, neighbours, and acquaintances what had befallen them in their search for the ass, each crying up the other’s perfection in braying. The whole story came to be known and spread abroad through the villages of the neighbourhood; and the devil, who never sleeps, with his love for sowing dissensions and scattering26 discord27 everywhere, blowing mischief28 about and making quarrels out of nothing, contrived29 to make the people of the other towns fall to braying whenever they saw anyone from our village, as if to throw the braying of our regidors in our teeth. Then the boys took to it, which was the same thing for it as getting into the hands and mouths of all the devils of hell; and braying spread from one town to another in such a way that the men of the braying town are as easy to be known as blacks are to be known from whites, and the unlucky joke has gone so far that several times the scoffed30 have come out in arms and in a body to do battle with the scoffers, and neither king nor rook, fear nor shame, can mend matters. To-morrow or the day after, I believe, the men of my town, that is, of the braying town, are going to take the field against another village two leagues away from ours, one of those that persecute31 us most; and that we may turn out well prepared I have bought these lances and halberds you have seen. These are the curious things I told you I had to tell, and if you don’t think them so, I have got no others;” and with this the worthy fellow brought his story to a close.
Just at this moment there came in at the gate of the inn a man entirely32 clad in chamois leather, hose, breeches, and doublet, who said in a loud voice, “Senor host, have you room? Here’s the divining ape and the show of the Release of Melisendra just coming.”
“Ods body!” said the landlord, “why, it’s Master Pedro! We’re in for a grand night!” I forgot to mention that the said Master Pedro had his left eye and nearly half his cheek covered with a patch of green taffety, showing that something ailed33 all that side. “Your worship is welcome, Master Pedro,” continued the landlord; “but where are the ape and the show, for I don’t see them?” “They are close at hand,” said he in the chamois leather, “but I came on first to know if there was any room.” “I’d make the Duke of Alva himself clear out to make room for Master Pedro,” said the landlord; “bring in the ape and the show; there’s company in the inn to-night that will pay to see that and the cleverness of the ape.” “So be it by all means,” said the man with the patch; “I’ll lower the price, and he well satisfied if I only pay my expenses; and now I’ll go back and hurry on the cart with the ape and the show;” and with this he went out of the inn.
Don Quixote at once asked the landlord what this Master Pedro was, and what was the show and what was the ape he had with him; which the landlord replied, “This is a famous puppet-showman, who for some time past has been going about this Mancha de Aragon, exhibiting a show of the release of Melisendra by the famous Don Gaiferos, one of the best and best-represented stories that have been seen in this part of the kingdom for many a year; he has also with him an ape with the most extraordinary gift ever seen in an ape or imagined in a human being; for if you ask him anything, he listens attentively34 to the question, and then jumps on his master’s shoulder, and pressing close to his ear tells him the answer which Master Pedro then delivers. He says a great deal more about things past than about things to come; and though he does not always hit the truth in every case, most times he is not far wrong, so that he makes us fancy he has got the devil in him. He gets two reals for every question if the ape answers; I mean if his master answers for him after he has whispered into his ear; and so it is believed that this same Master Pedro is very rich. He is a ‘gallant man’ as they say in Italy, and good company, and leads the finest life in the world; talks more than six, drinks more than a dozen, and all by his tongue, and his ape, and his show.”
Master Pedro now came back, and in a cart followed the show and the ape — a big one, without a tail and with buttocks as bare as felt, but not vicious-looking. As soon as Don Quixote saw him, he asked him, “Can you tell me, sir fortune-teller, what fish do we catch, and how will it be with us? See, here are my two reals,” and he bade Sancho give them to Master Pedro; but he answered for the ape and said, “Senor, this animal does not give any answer or information touching35 things that are to come; of things past he knows something, and more or less of things present.”
“Gad,” said Sancho, “I would not give a farthing to be told what’s past with me, for who knows that better than I do myself? And to pay for being told what I know would be mighty36 foolish. But as you know things present, here are my two reals, and tell me, most excellent sir ape, what is my wife Teresa Panza doing now, and what is she diverting herself with?”
Master Pedro refused to take the money, saying, “I will not receive payment in advance or until the service has been first rendered;” and then with his right hand he gave a couple of slaps on his left shoulder, and with one spring the ape perched himself upon it, and putting his mouth to his master’s ear began chattering37 his teeth rapidly; and having kept this up as long as one would be saying a credo, with another spring he brought himself to the ground, and the same instant Master Pedro ran in great haste and fell upon his knees before Don Quixote, and embracing his legs exclaimed, “These legs do I embrace as I would embrace the two pillars of Hercules, O illustrious reviver of knight38-errantry, so long consigned39 to oblivion! O never yet duly extolled40 knight, Don Quixote of La Mancha, courage of the faint-hearted, prop41 of the tottering42, arm of the fallen, staff and counsel of all who are unfortunate!”
Don Quixote was thunderstruck, Sancho astounded43, the cousin staggered, the page astonished, the man from the braying town agape, the landlord in perplexity, and, in short, everyone amazed at the words of the puppet-showman, who went on to say, “And thou, worthy Sancho Panza, the best squire44 and squire to the best knight in the world! Be of good cheer, for thy good wife Teresa is well, and she is at this moment hackling a pound of flax; and more by token she has at her left hand a jug45 with a broken spout46 that holds a good drop of wine, with which she solaces47 herself at her work.”
“That I can well believe,” said Sancho. “She is a lucky one, and if it was not for her jealousy48 I would not change her for the giantess Andandona, who by my master’s account was a very clever and worthy woman; my Teresa is one of those that won’t let themselves want for anything, though their heirs may have to pay for it.”
“Now I declare,” said Don Quixote, “he who reads much and travels much sees and knows a great deal. I say so because what amount of persuasion49 could have persuaded me that there are apes in the world that can divine as I have seen now with my own eyes? For I am that very Don Quixote of La Mancha this worthy animal refers to, though he has gone rather too far in my praise; but whatever I may be, I thank heaven that it has endowed me with a tender and compassionate50 heart, always disposed to do good to all and harm to none.”
“If I had money,” said the page, “I would ask senor ape what will happen me in the peregrination51 I am making.”
To this Master Pedro, who had by this time risen from Don Quixote’s feet, replied, “I have already said that this little beast gives no answer as to the future; but if he did, not having money would be of no consequence, for to oblige Senor Don Quixote, here present, I would give up all the profits in the world. And now, because I have promised it, and to afford him pleasure, I will set up my show and offer entertainment to all who are in the inn, without any charge whatever.” As soon as he heard this, the landlord, delighted beyond measure, pointed52 out a place where the show might be fixed53, which was done at once.
Don Quixote was not very well satisfied with the divinations of the ape, as he did not think it proper that an ape should divine anything, either past or future; so while Master Pedro was arranging the show, he retired54 with Sancho into a corner of the stable, where, without being overheard by anyone, he said to him, “Look here, Sancho, I have been seriously thinking over this ape’s extraordinary gift, and have come to the conclusion that beyond doubt this Master Pedro, his master, has a pact55, tacit or express, with the devil.”
“If the packet is express from the devil,” said Sancho, “it must be a very dirty packet no doubt; but what good can it do Master Pedro to have such packets?”
“Thou dost not understand me, Sancho,” said Don Quixote; “I only mean he must have made some compact with the devil to infuse this power into the ape, that he may get his living, and after he has grown rich he will give him his soul, which is what the enemy of mankind wants; this I am led to believe by observing that the ape only answers about things past or present, and the devil’s knowledge extends no further; for the future he knows only by guesswork, and that not always; for it is reserved for God alone to know the times and the seasons, and for him there is neither past nor future; all is present. This being as it is, it is clear that this ape speaks by the spirit of the devil; and I am astonished they have not denounced him to the Holy Office, and put him to the question, and forced it out of him by whose virtue56 it is that he divines; because it is certain this ape is not an astrologer; neither his master nor he sets up, or knows how to set up, those figures they call judiciary, which are now so common in Spain that there is not a jade57, or page, or old cobbler, that will not undertake to set up a figure as readily as pick up a knave58 of cards from the ground, bringing to nought59 the marvellous truth of the science by their lies and ignorance. I know of a lady who asked one of these figure schemers whether her little lap-dog would be in pup and would breed, and how many and of what colour the little pups would be. To which senor astrologer, after having set up his figure, made answer that the bitch would be in pup, and would drop three pups, one green, another bright red, and the third parti-coloured, provided she conceived between eleven and twelve either of the day or night, and on a Monday or Saturday; but as things turned out, two days after this the bitch died of a surfeit60, and senor planet-ruler had the credit all over the place of being a most profound astrologer, as most of these planet-rulers have.”
“Still,” said Sancho, “I would be glad if your worship would make Master Pedro ask his ape whether what happened your worship in the cave of Montesinos is true; for, begging your worship’s pardon, I, for my part, take it to have been all flam and lies, or at any rate something you dreamt.”
“That may be,” replied Don Quixote; “however, I will do what you suggest; though I have my own scruples61 about it.”
At this point Master Pedro came up in quest of Don Quixote, to tell him the show was now ready and to come and see it, for it was worth seeing. Don Quixote explained his wish, and begged him to ask his ape at once to tell him whether certain things which had happened to him in the cave of Montesinos were dreams or realities, for to him they appeared to partake of both. Upon this Master Pedro, without answering, went back to fetch the ape, and, having placed it in front of Don Quixote and Sancho, said: “See here, senor ape, this gentleman wishes to know whether certain things which happened to him in the cave called the cave of Montesinos were false or true.” On his making the usual sign the ape mounted on his left shoulder and seemed to whisper in his ear, and Master Pedro said at once, “The ape says that the things you saw or that happened to you in that cave are, part of them false, part true; and that he only knows this and no more as regards this question; but if your worship wishes to know more, on Friday next he will answer all that may be asked him, for his virtue is at present exhausted62, and will not return to him till Friday, as he has said.”
“Did I not say, senor,” said Sancho, “that I could not bring myself to believe that all your worship said about the adventures in the cave was true, or even the half of it?”
“The course of events will tell, Sancho,” replied Don Quixote; “time, that discloses all things, leaves nothing that it does not drag into the light of day, though it be buried in the bosom63 of the earth. But enough of that for the present; let us go and see Master Pedro’s show, for I am sure there must be something novel in it.”
“Something!” said Master Pedro; “this show of mine has sixty thousand novel things in it; let me tell you, Senor Don Quixote, it is one of the best-worth-seeing things in the world this day; but operibus credite et non verbis, and now let’s get to work, for it is growing late, and we have a great deal to do and to say and show.”
Don Quixote and Sancho obeyed him and went to where the show was already put up and uncovered, set all around with lighted wax tapers64 which made it look splendid and bright. When they came to it Master Pedro ensconced himself inside it, for it was he who had to work the puppets, and a boy, a servant of his, posted himself outside to act as showman and explain the mysteries of the exhibition, having a wand in his hand to point to the figures as they came out. And so, all who were in the inn being arranged in front of the show, some of them standing, and Don Quixote, Sancho, the page, and cousin, accommodated with the best places, the interpreter began to say what he will hear or see who reads or hears the next chapter.
唐吉诃德就像一只热锅上的蚂蚁，急于了解运送武器的人在路上答应讲的那些奇事。他按照店主的指点，找到了那个人，让那个人无论如何马上给他讲那些事情。那人答道：
“我说的那些奇事得慢慢讲，不能站着说。我的好大人，请先让我给骡子喂点吃的，然后再给你讲吧。我说的那些事准会让你惊奇。”
“那就别耽误时间了，”唐吉诃德说，“我来帮你做。”
说着他就动起手来，筛大麦，刷马槽。那人看到他那副热心的样子，也很愿意满足他的要求。送武器人在一条石凳上坐下来，唐吉诃德也挨着他坐下了。小伙子、青年人、桑乔和店主都凑过来听。那人讲道：
“诸位大概听说过，离这个客店大约四西里半的地方，有个市镇议员丢了一头驴。其实这是他家的一个女佣搞的鬼，说起来话就长了。议员虽然千方百计地找驴，却总也没找到。十五天过去了，丢驴的议员在广场上碰到了当地的另一位议员。那位议员对他说：‘请客吧，伙计，你的驴找着了。’‘我请客，没问题，伙计，’这个议员说，‘不过你告诉我，我的驴在哪儿呢？’‘在山上，’那个发现了驴的议员说，‘我今天早晨看见的。它身上的驮鞍和轭具都没了，看着真让人可怜。我想把它牵回来交给你，可是它已经变野了，不愿意见人。我刚走到它身边，它就跑掉了，钻进了大山深处。你要是愿意的话，咱们俩可以去找，不过你得先让我回家，把我这头驴安顿好。我马上就回来。’‘你如果能帮忙，’丢驴的议员说，‘我一定厚礼相谢。’我讲的情况就是这样，那些知道实情的人也是这么说的。于是，两个议员一起爬上山，到了那个地方找驴，可是找来找去没找到。他们又在周围的地方仔细寻找，还是没找到。于是那个发现了驴的议员对丢驴的议员说：‘听我说，伙计，我现在想到一个办法，要是照这个办法做，那头驴别说是藏在山里，就是藏在地底下，咱们也能找到它。我学驴叫学得特别好，如果你也能学驴叫，这事儿就成了。’‘你说学驴叫，伙计？’丢驴的议员问，‘天啊，要说学驴叫，我比谁都不差，就是跟驴比也不差呢。’‘那咱们就试试看，’另一位说，‘我想这样：你从山的这一侧上去，我从另一侧上去，咱们围着山走一遍。每走一段，你就学一声驴叫，我也跟着学驴叫。那头驴只要是在山里，就肯定能听见咱们叫，也会回答咱们。’丢驴的议员说：‘伙计，你的主意真不错，你真聪明。’
“于是两人分头行事。结果两人几乎是同时学驴叫，彼此都被对方的叫声欺骗了，以为是他们要找的驴出现了，便循声赶去。两人会合后，丢驴的议员说：‘伙计，难道刚才不是我的驴在叫么？’‘不，是我在叫。’另一个议员说。‘我告诉你吧，’丢驴的议员说，‘你的叫声和驴的叫声没什么区别，我这辈子还没听过谁学得这么像呢。’‘这恭维还是你当之无愧哟，我可不敢受用呀，伙计。我向上帝发誓，世界上学驴叫学得最像的人也只顶你一半。你声音高亢，声调持久，而且抑扬顿挫，有声有色，反正一句话，我只能是望尘莫及，甘拜下风啦。’‘由此看来，’丢驴的议员说，‘我可以引以自豪了，这说明我还有点本事，有一技之长。我以前就认为我学驴叫学得不错，可是从没想到像你说的这么好。’‘我还可以说，’那个议员说道，‘有些绝技已经在这个世界上失传了，那是因为某些不懂得利用它们的人使用不当所致。’‘像咱们这种绝技，若不是现在为自己的事用着了，恐怕在别处也派不上用场。就冲这点，咱们得求上帝保佑这种绝技总能对咱们有用。’
“说完两个人又分头行动，重新学起驴叫来，结果又是互相上当，重新会合在一起。最后，两人约定了暗号，连续叫两声便是他们自己的叫声，而不是驴的叫声。就这样，他们不时发出两声驴叫，走遍了一座大山，结果驴还是没回音。那头可怜而又倒霉的驴怎么会有回音呢，它已经在密林深处被狼吃掉了。后来，两个议员发现了驴的残骨。驴主人说：‘我原来就奇怪它怎么不回答呢。如果它没死，听见了咱们的声音肯定会叫，否则就不是驴了。不过，我听到你学驴叫学得这么像，也不枉我找驴一场，尽管我找到的是一头死驴。’‘你也不差呀，伙计，’另一个议员说，‘名师出高徒嘛！’说完两人便沙哑着嗓子垂头丧气地回到了镇子，并且向他们的朋友、邻居和熟人讲述了找驴的经过，还互相吹捧对方学驴叫顶呱呱。结果这件事被周围村镇的人知道了，并且传开了。魔鬼可没睡觉，它本来就喜欢到处挑拨是非，兴风作浪，结果邻近村镇的人一见到我们镇上的人就学驴叫，分明是以此来羞辱我们的议员学驴叫。
“年轻人也卷了进去，而且连说带比划，乱成一团，各个村镇都是一片驴叫声，闹得我们镇上的人到哪儿都能被人一眼认出来，就像黑白一样分明。最后，这种嘲弄发展到了我们这些被嘲弄者几次带着家伙成群结伙地去同那些嘲弄我们的人打架，打得难解难分，谁都不甘示弱。我估计明天或者哪一天，我们这个驴叫镇的人会去同离我们镇两西里的一个地方的人打架，那个地方的人尤其同我们过不去。你们看，我买的这些长矛和戟就是为此做准备的。这就是我要对你们讲的奇闻。如果你们觉得这算不上什么奇闻，别的事我就不知道了。”
送武器人刚讲完，客店门口来了一个人，他身上穿的袜子、肥腿裤和坎肩都是羊皮的。那人高声说道：
“店主大人，有房间吗？会占卦的猴子和《梅丽森德拉脱险记》的戏班子就要到了。”
“我的天哪，”店主说，“原来是佩德罗师傅！今儿晚上可热闹了。”
刚才忘了说明，这位佩德罗师傅的左眼和几乎半边脸都蒙着用绿色塔夫绸制的膏药，看样子那半边脸有什么毛病。店主接着说道：
“欢迎欢迎，佩德罗师傅。猴子和道具在哪儿呢，我怎么没看到？”
“已经很近了，”佩德罗师傅说，“我先来一步，看有没有房间。”
“就是阿尔瓦公爵在这儿住着，也得把房间让给佩德罗师傅呀！”店主说，“把猴子和道具运来吧。今晚店里有客人，他们要想看您的戏和猴儿表演就掏钱吧。”
“时机不错，”佩德罗师傅说，“我一定让让价，只要保住本就行了。我现在就去催促拉猴子和道具的车赶紧来。”
说完他转身走出了客店。
唐吉诃德问店主那佩德罗师傅是什么人，带来的是什么猴子和道具。店主答道：
“他是著名的木偶剧艺人，在靠近阿拉贡的曼查一带演出《著名的唐盖费罗斯解救梅丽森德拉》，已经好多天了。这是一部在这一带多年来没见过的优秀剧目，而且表演得很出色。他有一只猴子，非常聪明，别说跟猴子比，就是跟人比也不差。如果问它什么，它会认真听着，然后爬到主人的肩膀上，贴着主人的耳朵把答案告诉主人，然后佩德罗师傅再把答案告诉大家。它说的主要是过去的事情，对未来说得不多。虽然不是每次都回答得很准确，但大部分都能说对。因此，我们觉得它有魔鬼附身。猴子每回答一次问题，我是说它向主人耳语后，主人每代他回答一个问题，就收费两个雷阿尔，所以大家认为这位佩德罗师傅很有钱。他是一个风流男子，用意大利语说，是个‘好伙伴’，过着世界上最舒适的日子，说话比六个人说得多，喝酒比十二个人喝得多，这些全都靠他那张嘴、那只猴子和那个木偶剧团。”
这时，佩德罗师傅回来了，还有一辆车，车上是道具和一只猴子。猴子个头不小，没有尾巴，屁股毛烘烘的，不过猴子的脸并不难看。唐吉诃德一看见猴子便问：
“请告诉我，会占卦的先生，我们的命运如何？这是两个雷阿尔。”
唐吉诃德让桑乔交给佩德罗师傅两个雷阿尔。佩德罗替猴子答道：
“大人，这个猴子不回答关于未来的问题，它只谈过去的事情，现在的事情也能说一点儿。”
“岂有此理！”桑乔说，“我决不会花一分钱去让别人告诉我自己过去的事情。关于我自己的事儿，有谁能比我更清楚呢？花钱请教别人我已经知道的事情，那才是犯傻呢。不过，你既然知道现在的事情，这儿是两个雷阿尔，请告诉我，猴儿精大人，我老婆特雷莎·潘萨这会儿正在干什么，她怎样消磨时间？”
佩德罗师傅无意去接那两个雷阿尔，只是说：
“我不能未劳先取酬。”
说着他用右手拍自己的左肩两下，于是猴子一跃跳到了他肩上，把嘴凑到主人耳朵边，急速地搐动着牙齿，过了一会儿才跳回到地上。转瞬之间，佩德罗师傅已跪到唐吉诃德面前，抱住他的腿，说道：
“我抱着这两条腿，就仿佛抱着赫拉克勒斯的两根支柱！已被遗忘的骑士道的伟大振兴者呀！无论如何赞扬您都当之无愧的曼查的骑士唐吉诃德呀！您是呼唤昏厥者的精灵，扶持即将跌倒者的依靠，倒地者的保护人，所有不幸者的慰藉！”
唐吉诃德不知所措，桑乔目瞪口呆，小伙子表情茫然，青年人莫名其妙，送武器人如坠雾中，店主更是不知如何是好。总之，所有听了这番话的人都惊呆了。那木偶艺人继续说道：
“还有你，善良的桑乔！你是世界上最优秀骑士的最优秀侍从，你该知足了。你那位好老婆特雷莎现在很好，这会儿她正在梳理一磅亚麻。说得再具体一些，她身旁有个豁了口的酒坛子，里面装着很多葡萄酒。她正边干边喝呢。”
“我觉得这很好，”桑乔说，“她是个十分幸运的人。她不吃醋的时候，就是拿女巨人安丹多纳来换她，我也不干。据我主人说，那是个完美而又有用的巨人。我的特雷莎就是那种宁可亏待了孩子也不能委屈自己的人。”
“我告诉你们，”唐吉诃德说，“一个人看书多就见得多，也就见多识广，要不是我这会儿亲眼所见，我怎么会相信世界上有会占卦的猴子呢！我就是这个猴子所说的曼查的唐吉诃德，尽管它的颂扬有些言过其实。不过，无论我到底怎么样，得感谢老天，使我成了个心地善良的人，总是善待所有人，没有亏负过任何人。”
“如果我有钱，”青年人说，“我一定问问猴子，我此次远行会遇到什么情况。”
这时，佩德罗师傅已从唐吉诃德身边站起身来。他说道：
“我刚才已经说过，这个小畜生不回答有关未来事情的问题。如果它能回答，没钱也没关系。为了表示愿意为在场的唐吉诃德大人效劳，我愿意放弃我所有的利益。既然我应该而且愿意这样做，我要去布置戏台了，好为客店里的所有人免费助兴。”
店主一听，喜出望外，连忙去指点搭戏台的地方。戏台一会儿便搭好了。
唐吉诃德对猴子占卦并不十分满意，觉得无论是说过去还是道未来，让一个猴子出面总归不太合适。所以，在佩德罗师傅忙着搭戏台的时候，他同桑乔一起来到马厩一角谁也听不到他们说话的地方，对桑乔说：
“你听我说，桑乔，我仔细考虑了，这个猴子的本领很奇怪。我觉得不管是明文还是默契，它的主人佩德罗师傅肯定和魔鬼订过契约。”
“如果是给魔鬼搭的台子，那肯定很脏。”桑乔说，“不过，佩德罗师傅给魔鬼搭台子，对他又有什么好处呢？”
“你没听懂我的意思，桑乔，我是说他同魔鬼之间肯定有某种配合。他通过猴子施展魔鬼的本领，以此谋生，等发财以后，就把自己的灵魂交给魔鬼，而这正是与全人类为敌的魔鬼梦寐以求的。我相信这点是由于这只猴子只回答有关过去和现在的事情，魔鬼的智慧不也是仅限于此吗？对于未来的事情，它只能靠猜测，而且不是每次都能猜出来。只有上帝知道所有时候的事情；对于上帝来说，无所谓过去和未来，一切都是现在。
“事实既然如此，那个猴子显然是在以魔鬼的口吻说话。让我惊奇的是，怎么没有人向宗教裁判所告发它，对它进行调查，彻底搞清究竟是谁在占卦呢？无论是这只猴子还是它的主人，肯定都不会那种占星术。现在西班牙非常流行那种东西，无论是娘儿们还是小孩，或者修鞋的老头儿，都可以拿几张纸牌往地上一摊，靠他们的无知和谎言来断送科学的神圣真理。我听说有一位夫人请教算命先生，她的小母狗如果怀胎下崽，能够生几只什么颜色的小狗。那位算命先生掐算了一番之后说，如果她的小母狗怀胎生崽，能一窝生出三只小狗，一只是青色的，一只是肉色的，还有一只是杂色的，不过，必须是在白天或夜间的十一点和十二点之间交配，而且必须是在星期一或星期六。结果两天之后，那只母狗吃得太多撑死了。那个算命的也就同所有或者大多数算命先生一样，在当地被称为了‘一口清’。”
“不过，我倒是希望您让佩德罗师傅问问那只猴子，您在蒙特西诺斯洞里遇到的那些事情是不是真的。”桑乔说，“真对不起，我总觉得那全是骗人的东西，至少是虚幻的东西。”
“那倒有可能，”唐吉诃德说，“我就照你说的去办；不过，我总还是有点儿顾虑。”
恰巧佩德罗师傅来找唐吉诃德，说戏台已经准备就绪，请唐吉诃德看戏去，那出戏值得一看。唐吉诃德把自己的想法告诉了佩德罗师傅，请他马上就问问他的猴子，蒙特西诺斯洞里那些事究竟是虚幻还是事实。唐吉诃德自己觉得是两者兼而有之。佩德罗师傅一句话也没说，又把猴子带来了，当着唐吉诃德的面问猴子：
“猴儿先生，这位骑士想知道，他在一个名叫蒙特西诺斯的洞里看到的事情究竟是真的还是假的。”
他又像以往一样做了个手势，猴子跳到他的左肩上，那样子仿佛同他耳语了一番，然后佩德罗师傅说道：
“猴子说，您在那个洞里看到或遇到的事情部分是假部分是真。您问的事情，它现在只知道这些。如果您还有什么情况想了解，得等到星期五再问，它都可以回答您。现在，它神力已耗尽，就像刚才说的，得到星期五才能恢复呢。”
“我不是说过了吗，我的大人？”桑乔说，“我从来都不信您说的洞里那些事是真的，连一半都不信。”
“事实会说明一切，桑乔，”唐吉诃德说，“时间可以揭示一切事物，即使是埋在地下的事物，也终究会搞个水落石出。就说到这儿吧，现在咱们去看看好心的佩德罗师傅的戏吧，我想它肯定有点儿新鲜之处。”
“怎么是有点儿呢？”佩德罗师傅说，“我的戏里新鲜之处数以万计呢。我可以告诉您，唐吉诃德大人，这是世界上最值得看的东西，耳听为虚，眼见为实，咱们赶紧走吧，否则就晚了。我还有很多事要做要说要表演呢。”
唐吉诃德和桑乔跟着佩德罗师傅过去，来到那个露天戏台旁。戏台上到处都点满了蜡烛，显得一片辉煌又引人注目。他们一到，佩德罗师傅就钻进戏台里，他要在那儿操纵小木偶。戏台外面站着一个小伙计，佩德罗师傅让他讲解戏的内容。他手里拿着一根小棍，按照出场顺序一一指点着剧中人物。
客店里的所有人都来了，有的人还得站着。唐吉诃德、桑乔、青年人和那个小伙子坐在最好的位置看戏。讲解员开始讲解。其所说所演请看下章。
收听单词发音 |
1
leisurely
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| adj.悠闲的；从容的，慢慢的 | |
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standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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foddering
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| v.用饲料喂（fodder的现在分词形式） | |
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sifting
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| n.筛，过滤v.筛( sift的现在分词 )；筛滤；细查；详审 | |
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barley
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| n.大麦，大麦粒 | |
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humility
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| n.谦逊，谦恭 | |
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ass
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| n.驴；傻瓜，蠢笨的人 | |
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plaza
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| n.广场，市场 | |
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bowels
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| n.肠，内脏，内部；肠( bowel的名词复数 )；内部，最深处 | |
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bray
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| n.驴叫声, 喇叭声；v.驴叫 | |
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asses
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| n. 驴，愚蠢的人，臀部 adv. (常用作后置)用于贬损或骂人 | |
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worthy
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| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
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brayed
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| v.发出驴叫似的声音( bray的过去式和过去分词 )；发嘟嘟声；粗声粗气地讲话（或大笑）；猛击 | |
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braying
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| v.发出驴叫似的声音( bray的现在分词 )；发嘟嘟声；粗声粗气地讲话（或大笑）；猛击 | |
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brays
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| n.驴叫声，似驴叫的声音( bray的名词复数 )；（喇叭的）嘟嘟声v.发出驴叫似的声音( bray的第三人称单数 )；发嘟嘟声；粗声粗气地讲话（或大笑）；猛击 | |
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odds
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| n.让步，机率，可能性，比率；胜败优劣之别 | |
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accomplishment
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| n.完成，成就，（pl.）造诣，技能 | |
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excellence
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| n.优秀，杰出，(pl.)优点，美德 | |
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bestowed
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| 赠给，授予( bestow的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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countersign
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| v.副署，会签 | |
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brute
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| n.野兽，兽性 | |
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devoured
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| 吞没( devour的过去式和过去分词 )； 耗尽； 津津有味地看； 狼吞虎咽地吃光 | |
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acolyte
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| n.助手，侍僧 | |
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disconsolate
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| adj.忧郁的，不快的 | |
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hoarse
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| adj.嘶哑的，沙哑的 | |
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scattering
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| n.[物]散射；散乱，分散；在媒介质中的散播adj.散乱的；分散在不同范围的；广泛扩散的；（选票）数量分散的v.散射(scatter的ing形式)；散布；驱散 | |
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discord
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| n.不和，意见不合，争论，（音乐）不和谐 | |
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mischief
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| n.损害，伤害，危害；恶作剧，捣蛋，胡闹 | |
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contrived
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| adj.不自然的，做作的；虚构的 | |
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scoffed
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| 嘲笑，嘲弄( scoff的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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persecute
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| vt.迫害，虐待；纠缠，骚扰 | |
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entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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ailed
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| v.生病( ail的过去式和过去分词 )；感到不舒服；处境困难；境况不佳 | |
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attentively
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| adv.聚精会神地；周到地；谛；凝神 | |
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touching
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| adj.动人的，使人感伤的 | |
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mighty
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| adj.强有力的；巨大的 | |
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chattering
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| n. （机器振动发出的）咔嗒声，(鸟等)鸣，啁啾 adj. 喋喋不休的，啾啾声的 动词chatter的现在分词形式 | |
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knight
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| n.骑士，武士；爵士 | |
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consigned
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| v.把…置于（令人不快的境地）( consign的过去式和过去分词 )；把…托付给；把…托人代售；丟弃 | |
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extolled
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| v.赞颂，赞扬，赞美( extol的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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prop
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| vt.支撑；n.支柱，支撑物；支持者，靠山 | |
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tottering
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| adj.蹒跚的，动摇的v.走得或动得不稳( totter的现在分词 )；踉跄；蹒跚；摇摇欲坠 | |
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astounded
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| v.使震惊(astound的过去式和过去分词)；愕然；愕；惊讶 | |
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squire
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| n.护卫, 侍从, 乡绅 | |
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jug
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| n.(有柄，小口，可盛水等的)大壶，罐，盂 | |
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spout
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| v.喷出，涌出；滔滔不绝地讲；n.喷管；水柱 | |
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solaces
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| n.安慰，安慰物( solace的名词复数 ) | |
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48
jealousy
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| n.妒忌，嫉妒，猜忌 | |
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persuasion
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| n.劝说；说服；持有某种信仰的宗派 | |
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compassionate
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| adj.有同情心的，表示同情的 | |
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51
peregrination
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| n.游历，旅行 | |
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pointed
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| adj.尖的，直截了当的 | |
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fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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retired
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| adj.隐退的，退休的，退役的 | |
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pact
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| n.合同，条约，公约，协定 | |
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virtue
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| n.德行，美德；贞操；优点；功效，效力 | |
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jade
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| n.玉石；碧玉；翡翠 | |
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knave
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| n.流氓；（纸牌中的）杰克 | |
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nought
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| n.／adj.无，零 | |
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surfeit
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| v.使饮食过度；n.(食物)过量，过度 | |
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scruples
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| n.良心上的不安( scruple的名词复数 )；顾虑，顾忌v.感到于心不安，有顾忌( scruple的第三人称单数 ) | |
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exhausted
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| adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的 | |
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bosom
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| n.胸，胸部；胸怀；内心；adj.亲密的 | |
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tapers
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| （长形物体的）逐渐变窄( taper的名词复数 )； 微弱的光； 极细的蜡烛 | |
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