strife1 and debate raised betwixt the cake-bakers of Lerne, and those of Gargantua’s country, whereupon were waged great wars.
How there was great
At that time, which was the season of vintage, in the beginning of harvest, when the country shepherds were set to keep the vines, and hinder the starlings from eating up the grapes, as some cake-bakers of Lerne happened to pass along in the broad highway, driving into the city ten or twelve horses loaded with cakes, the said shepherds courteously2 entreated3 them to give them some for their money, as the price then ruled in the market. For here it is to be remarked, that it is a celestial4 food to eat for breakfast hot fresh cakes with grapes, especially the frail5 clusters, the great red grapes, the muscadine, the verjuice grape, and the laskard, for those that are costive in their belly6, because it will make them gush7 out, and squirt the length of a hunter’s staff, like the very tap of a barrel; and oftentimes, thinking to let a squib, they did all-to-besquatter and conskite themselves, whereupon they are commonly called the vintage thinkers. The bun-sellers or cake-makers were in nothing inclinable to their request; but, which was worse, did injure them most outrageously8, called them prattling9 gabblers, lickorous gluttons10, freckled11 bittors, mangy rascals12, shite-a-bed scoundrels, drunken roysters, sly knaves13, drowsy14 loiterers, slapsauce fellows, slabberdegullion druggels, lubberly louts, cozening foxes, ruffian rogues15, paltry16 customers, sycophant-varlets, drawlatch hoydens, flouting17 milksops, jeering18 companions, staring clowns, forlorn snakes, ninny lobcocks, scurvy19 sneaksbies, fondling fops, base loons, saucy20 coxcombs, idle lusks, scoffing21 braggarts, noddy meacocks, blockish grutnols, doddipol-joltheads, jobbernol goosecaps, foolish loggerheads, flutch calf-lollies, grouthead gnat-snappers, lob-dotterels, gaping22 changelings, codshead loobies, woodcock slangams, ninny-hammer flycatchers, noddypeak simpletons, turdy gut23, shitten shepherds, and other suchlike defamatory epithets24; saying further, that it was not for them to eat of these dainty cakes, but might very well content themselves with the coarse unranged bread, or to eat of the great brown household loaf. To which provoking words, one amongst them, called Forgier, an honest fellow of his person and a notable springal, made answer very calmly thus: How long is it since you have got horns, that you are become so proud? Indeed formerly25 you were wont26 to give us some freely, and will you not now let us have any for our money? This is not the part of good neighbours, neither do we serve you thus when you come hither to buy our good corn, whereof you make your cakes and buns. Besides that, we would have given you to the bargain some of our grapes, but, by his zounds, you may chance to repent27 it, and possibly have need of us at another time, when we shall use you after the like manner, and therefore remember it. Then Marquet, a prime man in the confraternity of the cake-bakers, said unto him, Yea, sir, thou art pretty well crest-risen this morning, thou didst eat yesternight too much millet28 and bolymong. Come hither, sirrah, come hither, I will give thee some cakes. Whereupon Forgier, dreading29 no harm, in all simplicity30 went towards him, and drew a sixpence out of his leather satchel31, thinking that Marquet would have sold him some of his cakes. But, instead of cakes, he gave him with his whip such a rude lash32 overthwart the legs, that the marks of the whipcord knots were apparent in them, then would have fled away; but Forgier cried out as loud as he could, O, murder, murder, help, help, help! and in the meantime threw a great cudgel after him, which he carried under his arm, wherewith he hit him in the coronal joint33 of his head, upon the crotaphic artery34 of the right side thereof, so forcibly, that Marquet fell down from his mare35 more like a dead than living man. Meanwhile the farmers and country swains, that were watching their walnuts36 near to that place, came running with their great poles and long staves, and laid such load on these cake-bakers, as if they had been to thresh upon green rye. The other shepherds and shepherdesses, hearing the lamentable37 shout of Forgier, came with their slings38 and slackies following them, and throwing great stones at them, as thick as if it had been hail. At last they overtook them, and took from them about four or five dozen of their cakes. Nevertheless they paid for them the ordinary price, and gave them over and above one hundred eggs and three baskets full of mulberries. Then did the cake-bakers help to get up to his mare Marquet, who was most shrewdly wounded, and forthwith returned to Lerne, changing the resolution they had to go to Pareille, threatening very sharp and boisterously39 the cowherds, shepherds, and farmers of Seville and Sinays. This done, the shepherds and shepherdesses made merry with these cakes and fine grapes, and sported themselves together at the sound of the pretty small pipe, scoffing and laughing at those vainglorious40 cake-bakers, who had that day met with a mischief41 for want of crossing themselves with a good hand in the morning. Nor did they forget to apply to Forgier’s leg some fair great red medicinal grapes, and so handsomely dressed it and bound it up that he was quickly cured.
1 strife | |
n.争吵,冲突,倾轧,竞争 | |
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2 courteously | |
adv.有礼貌地,亲切地 | |
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3 entreated | |
恳求,乞求( entreat的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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4 celestial | |
adj.天体的;天上的 | |
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5 frail | |
adj.身体虚弱的;易损坏的 | |
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6 belly | |
n.肚子,腹部;(像肚子一样)鼓起的部分,膛 | |
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7 gush | |
v.喷,涌;滔滔不绝(说话);n.喷,涌流;迸发 | |
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8 outrageously | |
凶残地; 肆无忌惮地; 令人不能容忍地; 不寻常地 | |
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9 prattling | |
v.(小孩般)天真无邪地说话( prattle的现在分词 );发出连续而无意义的声音;闲扯;东拉西扯 | |
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10 gluttons | |
贪食者( glutton的名词复数 ); 贪图者; 酷爱…的人; 狼獾 | |
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11 freckled | |
adj.雀斑;斑点;晒斑;(使)生雀斑v.雀斑,斑点( freckle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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12 rascals | |
流氓( rascal的名词复数 ); 无赖; (开玩笑说法)淘气的人(尤指小孩); 恶作剧的人 | |
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13 knaves | |
n.恶棍,无赖( knave的名词复数 );(纸牌中的)杰克 | |
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14 drowsy | |
adj.昏昏欲睡的,令人发困的 | |
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15 rogues | |
n.流氓( rogue的名词复数 );无赖;调皮捣蛋的人;离群的野兽 | |
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16 paltry | |
adj.无价值的,微不足道的 | |
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17 flouting | |
v.藐视,轻视( flout的现在分词 ) | |
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18 jeering | |
adj.嘲弄的,揶揄的v.嘲笑( jeer的现在分词 ) | |
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19 scurvy | |
adj.下流的,卑鄙的,无礼的;n.坏血病 | |
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20 saucy | |
adj.无礼的;俊俏的;活泼的 | |
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21 scoffing | |
n. 嘲笑, 笑柄, 愚弄 v. 嘲笑, 嘲弄, 愚弄, 狼吞虎咽 | |
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22 gaping | |
adj.口的;张口的;敞口的;多洞穴的v.目瞪口呆地凝视( gape的现在分词 );张开,张大 | |
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23 gut | |
n.[pl.]胆量;内脏;adj.本能的;vt.取出内脏 | |
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24 epithets | |
n.(表示性质、特征等的)词语( epithet的名词复数 ) | |
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25 formerly | |
adv.从前,以前 | |
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26 wont | |
adj.习惯于;v.习惯;n.习惯 | |
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27 repent | |
v.悔悟,悔改,忏悔,后悔 | |
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28 millet | |
n.小米,谷子 | |
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29 dreading | |
v.害怕,恐惧,担心( dread的现在分词 ) | |
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30 simplicity | |
n.简单,简易;朴素;直率,单纯 | |
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31 satchel | |
n.(皮或帆布的)书包 | |
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32 lash | |
v.系牢;鞭打;猛烈抨击;n.鞭打;眼睫毛 | |
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33 joint | |
adj.联合的,共同的;n.关节,接合处;v.连接,贴合 | |
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34 artery | |
n.干线,要道;动脉 | |
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35 mare | |
n.母马,母驴 | |
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36 walnuts | |
胡桃(树)( walnut的名词复数 ); 胡桃木 | |
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37 lamentable | |
adj.令人惋惜的,悔恨的 | |
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38 slings | |
抛( sling的第三人称单数 ); 吊挂; 遣送; 押往 | |
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39 boisterously | |
adv.喧闹地,吵闹地 | |
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40 vainglorious | |
adj.自负的;夸大的 | |
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41 mischief | |
n.损害,伤害,危害;恶作剧,捣蛋,胡闹 | |
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