How our ships were stranded1, and we were relieved by some people that were subject to Queen Whims2 (qui tenoient de la Quinte).
We weighed and set sail with a merry westerly gale3. When about seven leagues off (twenty-two miles) some gusts4 or scuds5 of wind suddenly arose, and the wind veering6 and shifting from point to point, was, as they say, like an old woman’s breech, at no certainty; so we first got our starboard tacks8 aboard, and hauled off our lee-sheets. Then the gusts increased, and by fits blowed all at once from several quarters, yet we neither settled nor braided up close our sails, but only let fly the sheets, not to go against the master of the ship’s direction; and thus having let go amain, lest we should spend our topsails, or the ship’s quick-side should lie in the water and she be overset, we lay by and run adrift; that is, in a landloper’s phrase, we temporized9 it. For he assured us that, as these gusts and whirlwinds would not do us much good, so they could not do us much harm, considering their easiness and pleasant strife10, as also the clearness of the sky and calmness of the current. So that we were to observe the philosopher’s rule, bear and forbear; that is, trim, or go according to the time.
However, these whirlwinds and gusts lasted so long that we persuaded the master to let us go and lie at trie with our main course; that is, to haul the tack7 aboard, the sheet close aft, the bowline set up, and the helm tied close aboard; so, after a stormy gale of wind, we broke through the whirlwind. But it was like falling into Scylla to avoid Charybdis (out of the frying-pan into the fire). For we had not sailed a league ere our ships were stranded upon some sands such as are the flats of St. Maixent.
All our company seemed mightily11 disturbed except Friar John, who was not a jot12 daunted13, and with sweet sugar-plum words comforted now one and then another, giving them hopes of speedy assistance from above, and telling them that he had seen Castor at the main-yardarm. Oh! that I were but now ashore14, cried Panurge, that is all I wish for myself at present, and that you who like the sea so well had each man of you two hundred thousand crowns. I would fairly let you set up shop on these sands, and would get a fat calf15 dressed and a hundred of faggots (i.e. bottles of wine) cooled for you against you come ashore. I freely consent never to mount a wife, so you but set me ashore and mount me on a horse, that I may go home. No matter for a servant, I will be contented16 to serve myself; I am never better treated than when I am without a man. Faith, old Plautus was in the right on’t when he said the more servants the more crosses; for such they are, even supposing they could want what they all have but too much of, a tongue, that most busy, dangerous, and pernicious member of servants. Accordingly, ’twas for their sakes alone that the racks and tortures for confession17 were invented, though some foreign civilians18 in our time have drawn19 alogical and unreasonable20 consequences from it.
That very moment we spied a sail that made towards us. When it was close by us, we soon knew what was the lading of the ship and who was aboard of her. She was full freighted with drums. I was acquainted with many of the passengers that came in her, who were most of ‘em of good families; among the rest Harry21 Cotiral, an old toast, who had got a swinging ass’s touch-tripe (penis) fastened to his waist, as the good women’s beads22 are to their girdle. In his left hand he held an old overgrown greasy23 foul24 cap, such as your scald-pated fellows wear, and in the right a huge cabbage-stump.
As soon as he saw me he was overjoyed, and bawled25 out to me, What cheer, ho? How dost like me now? Behold26 the true Algamana (this he said showing me the ass’s tickle-gizzard). This doctor’s cap is my true elixir27; and this (continued he, shaking the cabbage-stump in his fist) is lunaria major, you old noddy. I have ‘em, old boy, I have ‘em; we’ll make ‘em when thou’rt come back. But pray, father, said I, whence come you? Whither are you bound? What’s your lading? Have you smelt28 the salt deep? To these four questions he answered, From Queen Whims; for Touraine; alchemy; to the very bottom.
Whom have you got o’ board? said I. Said he, Astrologers, fortune-tellers, alchemists, rhymers, poets, painters, projectors29, mathematicians30, watchmakers, sing-songs, musicianers, and the devil and all of others that are subject to Queen Whims [Motteux gives the following footnote:—’La Quinte, This means a fantastic Humour, Maggots, or a foolish Giddiness of Brains; and also, a fifth, or the Proportion of Five in music, &c.’]. They have very fair legible patents to show for’t, as anybody may see. Panurge had no sooner heard this but he was upon the high-rope, and began to rail at them like mad. What o’ devil d’ye mean, cried he, to sit idly here like a pack of loitering sneaksbies, and see us stranded, while you may help us, and tow us off into the current? A plague o’ your whims! you can make all things whatsoever31, they say, so much as good weather and little children; yet won’t make haste to fasten some hawsers32 and cables, and get us off. I was just coming to set you afloat, quoth Harry Cotiral; by Trismegistus, I’ll clear you in a trice. With this he caused 7,532,810 huge drums to be unheaded on one side, and set that open side so that it faced the end of the streamers and pendants; and having fastened them to good tacklings and our ship’s head to the stern of theirs, with cables fastened to the bits abaft33 the manger in the ship’s loof, they towed us off ground at one pull so easily and pleasantly that you’d have wondered at it had you been there. For the dub-a-dub rattling34 of the drums, with the soft noise of the gravel35 which murmuring disputed us our way, and the merry cheers and huzzas of the sailors, made an harmony almost as good as that of the heavenly bodies when they roll and are whirled round their spheres, which rattling of the celestial36 wheels Plato said he heard some nights in his sleep.
We scorned to be behindhand with ‘em in civility, and gratefully gave ‘em store of our sausages and chitterlings, with which we filled their drums; and we were just a-hoisting two-and-sixty hogsheads of wine out of the hold, when two huge whirlpools with great fury made towards their ship, spouting37 more water than is in the river Vienne (Vigenne) from Chinon to Saumur; to make short, all their drums, all their sails, their concerns, and themselves were soused, and their very hose were watered by the collar.
Panurge was so overjoyed, seeing this, and laughed so heartily38, that he was forced to hold his sides, and it set him into a fit of the colic for two hours and more. I had a mind, quoth he, to make the dogs drink, and those honest whirlpools, egad, have saved me that labour and that cost. There’s sauce for them; (Greek). Water is good, saith a poet; let ‘em Pindarize upon’t. They never cared for fresh water but to wash their hands or their glasses. This good salt water will stand ‘em in good stead for want of sal ammoniac and nitre in Geber’s kitchen.
We could not hold any further discourse39 with ‘em; for the former whirlwind hindered our ship from feeling the helm. The pilot advised us henceforwards to let her run adrift and follow the stream, not busying ourselves with anything, but making much of our carcasses. For our only way to arrive safe at the queendom of Whims was to trust to the whirlwind and be led by the current.
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stranded
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| a.搁浅的，进退两难的 | |
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WHIMS
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| 虚妄，禅病 | |
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gale
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| n.大风，强风，一阵闹声（尤指笑声等） | |
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gusts
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| 一阵强风( gust的名词复数 )； （怒、笑等的）爆发； （感情的）迸发； 发作 | |
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scuds
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| v.（尤指船、舰或云彩）笔直、高速而平稳地移动( scud的第三人称单数 ) | |
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veering
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| n.改变的；犹豫的；顺时针方向转向；特指使船尾转向上风来改变航向v.（尤指交通工具）改变方向或路线( veer的现在分词 )；（指谈话内容、人的行为或观点）突然改变；（指风） （在北半球按顺时针方向、在南半球按逆时针方向）逐渐转向；风向顺时针转 | |
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tack
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| n.大头钉；假缝，粗缝 | |
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tacks
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| 大头钉( tack的名词复数 )； 平头钉； 航向； 方法 | |
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temporized
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| v.敷衍( temporize的过去式和过去分词 )；拖延；顺应时势；暂时同意 | |
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strife
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| n.争吵，冲突，倾轧，竞争 | |
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mightily
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| ad.强烈地；非常地 | |
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jot
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| n.少量；vi.草草记下；vt.匆匆写下 | |
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daunted
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| 使（某人）气馁，威吓( daunt的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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ashore
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| adv.在(向)岸上，上岸 | |
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calf
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| n.小牛，犊，幼仔，小牛皮 | |
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contented
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| adj.满意的，安心的，知足的 | |
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confession
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| n.自白，供认，承认 | |
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civilians
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| 平民，百姓( civilian的名词复数 )； 老百姓 | |
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drawn
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| v.拖，拉，拔出；adj.憔悴的，紧张的 | |
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unreasonable
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| adj.不讲道理的，不合情理的，过度的 | |
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harry
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| vt.掠夺，蹂躏，使苦恼 | |
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beads
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| n.（空心）小珠子( bead的名词复数 )；水珠；珠子项链 | |
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greasy
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| adj. 多脂的，油脂的 | |
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foul
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| adj.污秽的；邪恶的；v.弄脏；妨害；犯规；n.犯规 | |
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bawled
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| v.大叫，大喊( bawl的过去式和过去分词 )；放声大哭；大声叫出；叫卖（货物） | |
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behold
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| v.看，注视，看到 | |
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elixir
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| n.长生不老药，万能药 | |
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smelt
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| v.熔解，熔炼；n.银白鱼，胡瓜鱼 | |
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projectors
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| 电影放映机，幻灯机( projector的名词复数 ) | |
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mathematicians
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| 数学家( mathematician的名词复数 ) | |
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whatsoever
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| adv.（用于否定句中以加强语气）任何；pron.无论什么 | |
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hawsers
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| n.（供系船或下锚用的）缆索，锚链( hawser的名词复数 ) | |
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abaft
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| prep.在…之后；adv.在船尾，向船尾 | |
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rattling
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| adj. 格格作响的, 活泼的, 很好的 adv. 极其, 很, 非常 动词rattle的现在分词 | |
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gravel
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| n.砂跞；砂砾层；结石 | |
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celestial
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| adj.天体的；天上的 | |
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spouting
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| n.水落管系统v.（指液体）喷出( spout的现在分词 )；滔滔不绝地讲；喋喋不休地说；喷水 | |
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heartily
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| adv.衷心地，诚恳地，十分，很 | |
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discourse
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| n.论文，演说；谈话；话语；vi.讲述，著述 | |
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