But meanwhile the intellectual Arts were fast decaying.
The Art of Sight Recognition, being no longer needed, was no longer practised; and the studies of Geometry, Statics, Kinetics, and other kindred subjects, came soon to be considered superfluous1, and fell into disrespect and neglect even at our University. The inferior Art of Feeling speedily experienced the same fate at our Elementary Schools. Then the Isosceles classes, asserting that the Specimens2 were no longer used nor needed, and refusing to pay the customary tribute from the Criminal classes to the service of Education, waxed daily more numerous and more insolent3 on the strength of their immunity4 from the old burden which had formerly5 exercised the twofold wholesome6 effect of at once taming their brutal7 nature and thinning their excessive numbers.
Year by year the Soldiers and Artisans began more vehemently8 to assert — and with increasing truth — that there was no great difference between them and the very highest class of Polygons, now that they were raised to an equality with the latter, and enabled to grapple with all the difficulties and solve all the problems of life, whether Statical or Kinetical, by the simple process of Colour Recognition. Not content with the natural neglect into which Sight Recognition was falling, they began boldly to demand the legal prohibition9 of all “monopolizing and aristocratic Arts” and the consequent abolition10 of all endowments for the studies of Sight Recognition, Mathematics, and Feeling. Soon, they began to insist that inasmuch as Colour, which was a second Nature, had destroyed the need of aristocratic distinctions, the Law should follow in the same path, and that henceforth all individuals and all classes should be recognized as absolutely equal and entitled to equal rights.
Finding the higher Orders wavering and undecided, the leaders of the Revolution advanced still further in their requirements, and at last demanded that all classes alike, the Priests and the Women not excepted, should do homage11 to Colour by submitting to be painted. When it was objected that Priests and Women had no sides, they retorted that Nature and Expediency12 concurred13 in dictating14 that the front half of every human being (that is to say, the half containing his eye and mouth) should be distinguishable from his hinder half. They therefore brought before a general and extraordinary Assembly of all the States of Flatland a Bill proposing that in every Woman the half containing the eye and mouth should be coloured red, and the other half green. The Priests were to be painted in the same way, red being applied15 to that semicircle in which the eye and mouth formed the middle point; while the other or hinder semicircle was to be coloured green.
There was no little cunning in this proposal, which indeed emanated16 not from any Isosceles — for no being so degraded would have had angularity enough to appreciate, much less to devise, such a model of state-craft — but from an Irregular Circle who, instead of being destroyed in his childhood, was reserved by a foolish indulgence to bring desolation on his country and destruction on myriads17 of his followers18.
On the one hand the proposition was calculated to bring the Women in all classes over to the side of the Chromatic19 Innovation. For by assigning to the Women the same two colours as were assigned to the Priests, the Revolutionists thereby20 ensured that, in certain positions, every Woman would appear like a Priest, and be treated with corresponding respect and deference21 — a prospect22 that could not fail to attract the Female Sex in a mass.
But by some of my Readers the possibility of the identical appearance of Priests and Women, under the new Legislation, may not be recognized; if so, a word or two will make it obvious.
Imagine a woman duly decorated, according to the new Code; with the front half (i.e. the half containing eye and mouth) red, and with the hinder half green. Look at her from one side. Obviously you will see a straight line, HALF RED, HALF GREEN.
Now imagine a Priest, whose mouth is at M, and whose front semicircle (AMB) is consequently coloured red, while his hinder semicircle is green; so that the diameter AB divides the green from the red. If you contemplate23 the Great Man so as to have your eye in the same straight line as his dividing diameter (AB), what you will see will be a straight line (CBD), of which ONE HALF (CB) WILL BE RED, AND THE OTHER (BD) GREEN. The whole line (CD) will be rather shorter perhaps than that of a full-sized Woman, and will shade off more rapidly towards its extremities24; but the identity of the colours would give you an immediate25 impression of identity of Class, making you neglectful of other details. Bear in mind the decay of Sight Recognition which threatened society at the time of the Colour Revolt; add too the certainty that Women would speedily learn to shade off their extremities so as to imitate the Circles; it must then be surely obvious to you, my dear Reader, that the Colour Bill placed us under a great danger of confounding a Priest with a young Woman.
How attractive this prospect must have been to the Frail27 Sex may readily be imagined. They anticipated with delight the confusion that would ensue. At home they might hear political and ecclesiastical secrets intended not for them but for their husbands and brothers, and might even issue commands in the name of a priestly Circle; out of doors the striking combination of red and green, without addition of any other colours, would be sure to lead the common people into endless mistakes, and the Women would gain whatever the Circles lost, in the deference of the passers by. As for the scandal that would befall the Circular Class if the frivolous28 and unseemly conduct of the Women were imputed29 to them, and as to the consequent subversion30 of the Constitution, the Female Sex could not be expected to give a thought to these considerations. Even in the households of the Circles, the Women were all in favour of the Universal Colour Bill.
The second object aimed at by the Bill was the gradual demoralization of the Circles themselves. In the general intellectual decay they still preserved their pristine31 clearness and strength of understanding. From their earliest childhood, familiarized in their Circular households with the total absence of Colour, the Nobles alone preserved the Sacred Art of Sight Recognition, with all the advantages that result from that admirable training of the intellect. Hence, up to the date of the introduction of the Universal Colour Bill, the Circles had not only held their own, but even increased their lead of the other classes by abstinence from the popular fashion.
Now therefore the artful Irregular whom I described above as the real author of this diabolical32 Bill, determined33 at one blow to lower the status of the Hierarchy34 by forcing them to submit to the pollution of Colour, and at the same time to destroy their domestic opportunities of training in the Art of Sight Recognition, so as to enfeeble their intellects by depriving them of their pure and colourless homes. Once subjected to the chromatic taint26, every parental35 and every childish Circle would demoralize each other. Only in discerning between the Father and the Mother would the Circular infant find problems for the exercise of its understanding — problems too often likely to be corrupted36 by maternal37 impostures with the result of shaking the child’s faith in all logical conclusions. Thus by degrees the intellectual lustre38 of the Priestly Order would wane39, and the road would then lie open for a total destruction of all Aristocratic Legislature and for the subversion of our Privileged Classes.
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1
superfluous
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| adj.过多的，过剩的，多余的 | |
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specimens
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| n.样品( specimen的名词复数 )；范例；（化验的）抽样；某种类型的人 | |
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insolent
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| adj.傲慢的，无理的 | |
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immunity
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| n.优惠；免除；豁免，豁免权 | |
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formerly
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| adv.从前，以前 | |
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wholesome
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| adj.适合；卫生的；有益健康的；显示身心健康的 | |
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brutal
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| adj.残忍的，野蛮的，不讲理的 | |
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vehemently
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| adv. 热烈地 | |
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prohibition
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| n.禁止；禁令，禁律 | |
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abolition
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| n.废除，取消 | |
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homage
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| n.尊敬，敬意，崇敬 | |
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expediency
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| n.适宜；方便；合算；利己 | |
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concurred
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| 同意（concur的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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dictating
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| v.大声讲或读( dictate的现在分词 )；口授；支配；摆布 | |
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applied
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| adj.应用的；v.应用，适用 | |
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emanated
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| v.从…处传出，传出( emanate的过去式和过去分词 )；产生，表现，显示 | |
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myriads
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| n.无数，极大数量( myriad的名词复数 ) | |
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followers
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| 追随者( follower的名词复数 )； 用户； 契据的附面； 从动件 | |
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chromatic
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| adj.色彩的，颜色的 | |
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thereby
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| adv.因此，从而 | |
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deference
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| n.尊重，顺从；敬意 | |
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prospect
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| n.前景，前途；景色，视野 | |
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contemplate
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| vt.盘算，计议；周密考虑；注视，凝视 | |
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extremities
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| n.端点( extremity的名词复数 )；尽头；手和足；极窘迫的境地 | |
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immediate
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| adj.立即的；直接的，最接近的；紧靠的 | |
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taint
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| n.污点；感染；腐坏；v.使感染；污染 | |
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frail
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| adj.身体虚弱的；易损坏的 | |
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frivolous
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| adj.轻薄的；轻率的 | |
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29
imputed
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| v.把（错误等）归咎于( impute的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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subversion
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| n.颠覆，破坏 | |
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pristine
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| adj.原来的，古时的，原始的，纯净的，无垢的 | |
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diabolical
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| adj.恶魔似的，凶暴的 | |
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33
determined
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| adj.坚定的；有决心的 | |
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34
hierarchy
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| n.等级制度；统治集团，领导层 | |
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parental
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| adj.父母的；父的；母的 | |
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36
corrupted
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| （使）败坏( corrupt的过去式和过去分词 )； （使）腐化； 引起（计算机文件等的）错误； 破坏 | |
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maternal
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| adj.母亲的，母亲般的，母系的，母方的 | |
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lustre
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| n.光亮，光泽；荣誉 | |
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wane
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| n.衰微，亏缺，变弱；v.变小，亏缺，呈下弦 | |
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