This time of utmost need was come to Maggie, with her short span of thirteen years. To the usual precocity7 of the girl, she added that early experience of struggle, of conflict between the inward impulse and outward fact, which is the lot of every imaginative and passionate8 nature; and the years since she hammered the nails into her wooden Fetish among the worm-eaten shelves of the attic10 had been filled with so eager a life in the triple world of Reality, Books, and Waking Dreams, that Maggie was strangely old for her years in everything except in her entire want of that prudence11 and self-command which were the qualities that made Tom manly12 in the midst of his intellectual boyishness. And now her lot was beginning to have a still, sad monotony, which threw her more than ever on her inward self. Her father was able to attend to business again, his affairs were settled, and he was acting13 as Wakem’s manager on the old spot. Tom went to and fro every morning and evening, and became more and more silent in the short intervals14 at home; what was there to say? One day was like another; and Tom’s interest in life, driven back and crushed on every other side, was concentrating itself into the one channel of ambitious resistance to misfortune. The peculiarities15 of his father and mother were very irksome to him, now they were laid bare of all the softening16 accompaniments of an easy, prosperous home; for Tom had very clear, prosaic17 eyes, not apt to be dimmed by mists of feeling or imagination. Poor Mrs. Tulliver, it seemed, would never recover her old self, her placid18 household activity; how could she? The objects among which her mind had moved complacently19 were all gone — all the little hopes and schemes and speculations20, all the pleasant little cares about her treasures which had made the world quite comprehensible to her for a quarter of a century, since she had made her first purchase of the sugar-tongs, had been suddenly snatched away from her, and she remained bewildered in this empty life. Why that should have happened to her which had not happened to other women remained an insoluble question by which she expressed her perpetual ruminating21 comparison of the past with the present. It was piteous to see the comely22 woman getting thinner and more worn under a bodily as well as mental restlessness, which made her often wander about the empty house after her work was done, until Maggie, becoming alarmed about her, would seek her, and bring her down by telling her how it vexed23 Tom that she was injuring her health by never sitting down and resting herself. Yet amidst this helpless imbecility there was a touching24 trait of humble25, self-devoting maternity26, which made Maggie feel tenderly toward her poor mother amidst all the little wearing griefs caused by her mental feebleness. She would let Maggie do none of the work that was heaviest and most soiling to the hands, and was quite peevish27 when Maggie attempted to relieve her from her grate-brushing and scouring28: “Let it alone, my dear; your hands ‘ull get as hard as hard,” she would say; “it’s your mother’s place to do that. I can’t do the sewing — my eyes fail me.” And she would still brush and carefully tend Maggie’s hair, which she had become reconciled to, in spite of its refusal to curl, now it was so long and massy. Maggie was not her pet child, and, in general, would have been much better if she had been quite different; yet the womanly heart, so bruised29 in its small personal desires, found a future to rest on in the life of this young thing, and the mother pleased herself with wearing out her own hands to save the hands that had so much more life in them.
But the constant presence of her mother’s regretful bewilderment was less painful to Maggie than that of her father’s sullen30, incommunicative depression. As long as the paralysis31 was upon him, and it seemed as if he might always be in a childlike condition of dependence32 — as long as he was still only half awakened33 to his trouble — Maggie had felt the strong tide of pitying love almost as an inspiration, a new power, that would make the most difficult life easy for his sake; but now, instead of childlike dependence, there had come a taciturn, hard concentration of purpose, in strange contrast with his old vehement34 communicativeness and high spirit; and this lasted from day to day, and from week to week, the dull eye never brightening with any eagerness or any joy. It is something cruelly incomprehensible to youthful natures, this sombre sameness in middle-aged35 and elderly people, whose life has resulted in disappointment and discontent, to whose faces a smile becomes so strange that the sad lines all about the lips and brow seem to take no notice of it, and it hurries away again for want of a welcome. “Why will they not kindle36 up and be glad sometimes?” thinks young elasticity37. “It would be so easy if they only liked to do it.” And these leaden clouds that never part are apt to create impatience38 even in the filial affection that streams forth39 in nothing but tenderness and pity in the time of more obvious affliction.
Mr. Tulliver lingered nowhere away from home; he hurried away from market, he refused all invitations to stay and chat, as in old times, in the houses where he called on business. He could not be reconciled with his lot. There was no attitude in which his pride did not feel its bruises40; and in all behavior toward him, whether kind or cold, he detected an allusion41 to the change in his circumstances. Even the days on which Wakem came to ride round the land and inquire into the business were not so black to him as those market-days on which he had met several creditors42 who had accepted a composition from him. To save something toward the repayment43 of those creditors was the object toward which he was now bending all his thoughts and efforts; and under the influence of this all-compelling demand of his nature, the somewhat profuse44 man, who hated to be stinted46 or to stint45 any one else in his own house, was gradually metamorphosed into the keen-eyed grudger47 of morsels48. Mrs. Tulliver could not economize49 enough to satisfy him, in their food and firing; and he would eat nothing himself but what was of the coarsest quality. Tom, though depressed50 and strongly repelled51 by his father’s sullenness52, and the dreariness53 of home, entered thoroughly54 into his father’s feelings about paying the creditors; and the poor lad brought his first quarter’s money, with a delicious sense of achievement, and gave it to his father to put into the tin box which held the savings55. The little store of sovereigns in the tin box seemed to be the only sight that brought a faint beam of pleasure into the miller’s eyes — faint and transient, for it was soon dispelled56 by the thought that the time would be long — perhaps longer than his life — before the narrow savings could remove the hateful incubus57 of debt. A deficit58 of more than five hundred pounds, with the accumulating interest, seemed a deep pit to fill with the savings from thirty shillings a-week, even when Tom’s probable savings were to be added. On this one point there was entire community of feeling in the four widely differing beings who sat round the dying fire of sticks, which made a cheap warmth for them on the verge59 of bedtime. Mrs. Tulliver carried the proud integrity of the Dodsons in her blood, and had been brought up to think that to wrong people of their money, which was another phrase for debt, was a sort of moral pillory60; it would have been wickedness, to her mind, to have run counter to her husband’s desire to “do the right thing,” and retrieve61 his name. She had a confused, dreamy notion that, if the creditors were all paid, her plate and linen62 ought to come back to her; but she had an inbred perception that while people owed money they were unable to pay, they couldn’t rightly call anything their own. She murmured a little that Mr. Tulliver so peremptorily63 refused to receive anything in repayment from Mr. and Mrs. Moss64; but to all his requirements of household economy she was submissive to the point of denying herself the cheapest indulgences of mere9 flavor; her only rebellion was to smuggle65 into the kitchen something that would make rather a better supper than usual for Tom.
These narrow notions about debt, held by the old fashioned Tullivers, may perhaps excite a smile on the faces of many readers in these days of wide commercial views and wide philosophy, according to which everything rights itself without any trouble of ours. The fact that my tradesman is out of pocket by me is to be looked at through the serene66 certainty that somebody else’s tradesman is in pocket by somebody else; and since there must be bad debts in the world, why, it is mere egoism not to like that we in particular should make them instead of our fellow-citizens. I am telling the history of very simple people, who had never had any illuminating67 doubts as to personal integrity and honor.
Under all this grim melancholy68 and narrowing concentration of desire, Mr. Tulliver retained the feeling toward his “little wench” which made her presence a need to him, though it would not suffice to cheer him. She was still the desire of his eyes; but the sweet spring of fatherly love was now mingled69 with bitterness, like everything else. When Maggie laid down her work at night, it was her habit to get a low stool and sit by her father’s knee, leaning her cheek against it. How she wished he would stroke her head, or give some sign that he was soothed70 by the sense that he had a daughter who loved him! But now she got no answer to her little caresses71, either from her father or from Tom — the two idols72 of her life. Tom was weary and abstracted in the short intervals when he was at home, and her father was bitterly preoccupied73 with the thought that the girl was growing up, was shooting up into a woman; and how was she to do well in life? She had a poor chance for marrying, down in the world as they were. And he hated the thought of her marrying poorly, as her aunt Gritty had done; that would be a thing to make him turn in his grave — the little wench so pulled down by children and toil74, as her aunt Moss was. When uncultured minds, confined to a narrow range of personal experience, are under the pressure of continued misfortune, their inward life is apt to become a perpetually repeated round of sad and bitter thoughts; the same words, the same scenes, are revolved75 over and over again, the same mood accompanies them; the end of the year finds them as much what they were at the beginning as if they were machines set to a recurrent series of movements.
The sameness of the days was broken by few visitors. Uncles and aunts paid only short visits now; of course, they could not stay to meals, and the constraint76 caused by Mr. Tulliver’s savage77 silence, which seemed to add to the hollow resonance78 of the bare, uncarpeted room when the aunts were talking, heightened the unpleasantness of these family visits on all sides, and tended to make them rare. As for other acquaintances, there is a chill air surrounding those who are down in the world, and people are glad to get away from them, as from a cold room; human beings, mere men and women, without furniture, without anything to offer you, who have ceased to count as anybody, present an embarrassing negation79 of reasons for wishing to see them, or of subjects on which to converse80 with them. At that distant day, there was a dreary isolation81 in the civilized82 Christian83 society of these realms for families that had dropped below their original level, unless they belonged to a sectarian church, which gets some warmth of brotherhood84 by walling in the sacred fire.
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1
agitation
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| n.搅动；搅拌；鼓动，煽动 | |
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stimulus
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| n.刺激，刺激物，促进因素，引起兴奋的事物 | |
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3
intensity
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| n.强烈，剧烈；强度；烈度 | |
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counteracts
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| 对抗，抵消( counteract的第三人称单数 ) | |
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dreary
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| adj.令人沮丧的，沉闷的，单调乏味的 | |
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peremptory
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| adj.紧急的，专横的，断然的 | |
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precocity
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| n.早熟，早成 | |
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passionate
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，激昂的，易动情的，易怒的，性情暴躁的 | |
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9
mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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attic
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| n.顶楼，屋顶室 | |
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11
prudence
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| n.谨慎，精明，节俭 | |
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manly
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| adj.有男子气概的；adv.男子般地，果断地 | |
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13
acting
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| n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的 | |
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14
intervals
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| n.[军事]间隔( interval的名词复数 )；间隔时间；[数学]区间；（戏剧、电影或音乐会的）幕间休息 | |
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15
peculiarities
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| n. 特质, 特性, 怪癖, 古怪 | |
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softening
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| 变软，软化 | |
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prosaic
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| adj.单调的，无趣的 | |
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18
placid
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| adj.安静的，平和的 | |
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19
complacently
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| adv. 满足地, 自满地, 沾沾自喜地 | |
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20
speculations
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| n.投机买卖( speculation的名词复数 )；思考；投机活动；推断 | |
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21
ruminating
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| v.沉思( ruminate的现在分词 )；反复考虑；反刍；倒嚼 | |
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22
comely
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| adj.漂亮的，合宜的 | |
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23
vexed
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| adj.争论不休的；（指问题等）棘手的；争论不休的问题；烦恼的v.使烦恼( vex的过去式和过去分词 )；使苦恼；使生气；详细讨论 | |
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24
touching
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| adj.动人的，使人感伤的 | |
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25
humble
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| adj.谦卑的，恭顺的；地位低下的；v.降低，贬低 | |
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26
maternity
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| n.母性，母道，妇产科病房；adj.孕妇的，母性的 | |
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27
peevish
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| adj.易怒的，坏脾气的 | |
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scouring
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| 擦[洗]净，冲刷，洗涤 | |
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bruised
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| [医]青肿的，瘀紫的 | |
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30
sullen
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| adj.愠怒的，闷闷不乐的，(天气等)阴沉的 | |
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paralysis
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| n.麻痹(症)；瘫痪(症) | |
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32
dependence
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| n.依靠，依赖；信任，信赖；隶属 | |
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33
awakened
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| v.（使）醒( awaken的过去式和过去分词 )；（使）觉醒；弄醒；（使）意识到 | |
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34
vehement
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| adj.感情强烈的；热烈的；(人)有强烈感情的 | |
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35
middle-aged
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| adj.中年的 | |
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36
kindle
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| v.点燃，着火 | |
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elasticity
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| n.弹性，伸缩力 | |
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38
impatience
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| n.不耐烦，急躁 | |
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forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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40
bruises
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| n.瘀伤，伤痕，擦伤( bruise的名词复数 ) | |
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41
allusion
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| n.暗示，间接提示 | |
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42
creditors
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| n.债权人，债主( creditor的名词复数 ) | |
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43
repayment
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| n.偿还，偿还款；报酬 | |
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44
profuse
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| adj.很多的，大量的，极其丰富的 | |
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45
stint
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| v.节省，限制，停止；n.舍不得化，节约，限制；连续不断的一段时间从事某件事 | |
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46
stinted
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| v.限制，节省（stint的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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47
grudger
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| 不满； 怨恨； 恶意； 妒忌 | |
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48
morsels
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| n.一口( morsel的名词复数 )；（尤指食物）小块，碎屑 | |
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49
economize
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| v.节约，节省 | |
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50
depressed
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| adj.沮丧的，抑郁的，不景气的，萧条的 | |
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51
repelled
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| v.击退( repel的过去式和过去分词 )；使厌恶；排斥；推开 | |
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52
sullenness
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| n. 愠怒, 沉闷, 情绪消沉 | |
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53
dreariness
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| 沉寂，可怕，凄凉 | |
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54
thoroughly
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| adv.完全地，彻底地，十足地 | |
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55
savings
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| n.存款，储蓄 | |
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56
dispelled
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| v.驱散，赶跑( dispel的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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57
incubus
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| n.负担；恶梦 | |
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58
deficit
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| n.亏空，亏损；赤字，逆差 | |
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59
verge
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| n.边，边缘；v.接近，濒临 | |
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60
pillory
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| n.嘲弄；v.使受公众嘲笑；将…示众 | |
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61
retrieve
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| vt.重新得到，收回；挽回，补救；检索 | |
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62
linen
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| n.亚麻布，亚麻线，亚麻制品；adj.亚麻布制的，亚麻的 | |
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63
peremptorily
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| adv.紧急地，不容分说地，专横地 | |
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moss
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| n.苔，藓，地衣 | |
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65
smuggle
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| vt.私运；vi.走私 | |
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66
serene
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| adj. 安详的，宁静的，平静的 | |
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67
illuminating
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| a.富于启发性的，有助阐明的 | |
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68
melancholy
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| n.忧郁，愁思；adj.令人感伤（沮丧）的，忧郁的 | |
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69
mingled
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| 混合，混入( mingle的过去式和过去分词 )； 混进，与…交往[联系] | |
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70
soothed
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| v.安慰( soothe的过去式和过去分词 )；抚慰；使舒服；减轻痛苦 | |
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71
caresses
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| 爱抚，抚摸( caress的名词复数 ) | |
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72
idols
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| 偶像( idol的名词复数 )； 受崇拜的人或物； 受到热爱和崇拜的人或物； 神像 | |
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73
preoccupied
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| adj.全神贯注的，入神的；被抢先占有的；心事重重的v.占据（某人）思想，使对…全神贯注，使专心于( preoccupy的过去式) | |
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74
toil
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| vi.辛劳工作，艰难地行动；n.苦工，难事 | |
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75
revolved
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| v.（使）旋转( revolve的过去式和过去分词 )；细想 | |
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76
constraint
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| n.(on)约束，限制；限制(或约束)性的事物 | |
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77
savage
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| adj.野蛮的；凶恶的，残暴的；n.未开化的人 | |
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78
resonance
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| n.洪亮；共鸣；共振 | |
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79
negation
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| n.否定；否认 | |
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80
converse
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| vi.谈话，谈天，闲聊；adv.相反的，相反 | |
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81
isolation
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| n.隔离，孤立，分解，分离 | |
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82
civilized
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| a.有教养的，文雅的 | |
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83
Christian
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| adj.基督教徒的；n.基督教徒 | |
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84
brotherhood
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| n.兄弟般的关系，手中情谊 | |
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