I loved our theatricals, especially the numerous, noisy, and rather incoherent rehearsals5, after which they always gave a supper. In the choice of the plays and the distribution of the parts I had no hand at all. The post assigned to me lay behind the scenes. I painted the scenes, copied out the parts, prompted, made up the actors’ faces; and I was entrusted7, too, with various stage effects such as thunder, the singing of nightingales, and so on. Since I had no proper social position and no decent clothes, at the rehearsals I held aloof8 from the rest in the shadows of the wings and maintained a shy silence.
I painted the scenes at the Azhogins’ either in the barn or in the yard. I was assisted by Andrey Ivanov, a house painter, or, as he called himself, a contractor9 for all kinds of house decorations, a tall, very thin, pale man of fifty, with a hollow chest, with sunken temples, with blue rings round his eyes, rather terrible to look at in fact. He was afflicted10 with some internal malady11, and every autumn and spring people said that he wouldn’t recover, but after being laid up for a while he would get up and say afterwards with surprise: “I have escaped dying again.”
In the town he was called Radish, and they declared that this was his real name. He was as fond of the theatre as I was, and as soon as rumours12 reached him that a performance was being got up he threw aside all his work and went to the Azhogins’ to paint scenes.
The day after my talk with my sister, I was working at the Azhogins’ from morning till night. The rehearsal6 was fixed13 for seven o’clock in the evening, and an hour before it began all the amateurs were gathered together in the hall, and the eldest, the middle, and the youngest Azhogins were pacing about the stage, reading from manuscript books. Radish, in a long rusty-red overcoat and a scarf muffled14 round his neck, already stood leaning with his head against the wall, gazing with a devout15 expression at the stage. Madame Azhogin went up first to one and then to another guest, saying something agreeable to each. She had a way of gazing into one’s face, and speaking softly as though telling a secret.
“It must be difficult to paint scenery,” she said softly, coming up to me. “I was just talking to Madame Mufke about superstitions16 when I saw you come in. My goodness, my whole life I have been waging war against superstitions! To convince the servants what nonsense all their terrors are, I always light three candles, and begin all my important undertakings17 on the thirteenth of the month.”
Dolzhikov’s daughter came in, a plump, fair beauty, dressed, as people said, in everything from Paris. She did not act, but a chair was set for her on the stage at the rehearsals, and the performances never began till she had appeared in the front row, dazzling and astounding18 everyone with her fine clothes. As a product of the capital she was allowed to make remarks during the rehearsals; and she did so with a sweet indulgent smile, and one could see that she looked upon our performance as a childish amusement. It was said she had studied singing at the Petersburg Conservatoire, and even sang for a whole winter in a private opera. I thought her very charming, and I usually watched her through the rehearsals and performances without taking my eyes off her.
I had just picked up the manuscript book to begin prompting when my sister suddenly made her appearance. Without taking off her cloak or hat, she came up to me and said:
“Come along, I beg you.”
I went with her. Anyuta Blagovo, also in her hat and wearing a dark veil, was standing19 behind the scenes at the door. She was the daughter of the Assistant President of the Court, who had held that office in our town almost ever since the establishment of the circuit court. Since she was tall and had a good figure, her assistance was considered indispensable for tableaux vivants, and when she represented a fairy or something like Glory her face burned with shame; but she took no part in dramatic performances, and came to the rehearsals only for a moment on some special errand, and did not go into the hall. Now, too, it was evident that she had only looked in for a minute.
“My father was speaking about you,” she said drily, blushing and not looking at me. “Dolzhikov has promised you a post on the railway-line. Apply to him tomorrow; he will be at home.”
I bowed and thanked her for the trouble she had taken.
“And you can give up this,” she said, indicating the exercise book.
My sister and she went up to Madame Azhogin and for two minutes they were whispering with her looking towards me; they were consulting about something.
“Yes, indeed,” said Madame Azhogin, softly coming up to me and looking intently into my face. “Yes, indeed, if this distracts you from serious pursuits”—she took the manuscript book from my hands —“you can hand it over to someone else; don’t distress20 yourself, my friend, go home, and good luck to you.”
I said good-bye to her, and went away overcome with confusion. As I went down the stairs I saw my sister and Anyuta Blagovo going away; they were hastening along, talking eagerly about something, probably about my going into the railway service. My sister had never been at a rehearsal before, and now she was most likely conscience-stricken, and afraid her father might find out that, without his permission, she had been to the Azhogins’!
I went to Dolzhikov’s next day between twelve and one. The footman conducted me into a very beautiful room, which was the engineer’s drawing-room, and, at the same time, his working study. Everything here was soft and elegant, and, for a man so unaccustomed to luxury as I was, it seemed strange. There were costly21 rugs, huge arm-chairs, bronzes, pictures, gold and plush frames; among the photographs scattered22 about the walls there were very beautiful women, clever, lovely faces, easy attitudes; from the drawing-room there was a door leading straight into the garden on to a verandah: one could see lilac-trees; one could see a table laid for lunch, a number of bottles, a bouquet23 of roses; there was a fragrance24 of spring and expensive cigars, a fragrance of happiness—and everything seemed as though it would say: “Here is a man who has lived and laboured, and has attained25 at last the happiness possible on earth.” The engineer’s daughter was sitting at the writing-table, reading a newspaper.
“You have come to see my father?” she asked. “He is having a shower bath; he will be here directly. Please sit down and wait.”
I sat down.
“I believe you live opposite?” she questioned me, after a brief silence.
“Yes.”
“I am so bored that I watch you every day out of the window; you must excuse me,” she went on, looking at the newspaper, “and I often see your sister; she always has such a look of kindness and concentration.”
Dolzhikov came in. He was rubbing his neck with a towel.
“Papa, Monsieur Poloznev,” said his daughter.
“Yes, yes, Blagovo was telling me,” he turned briskly to me without giving me his hand. “But listen, what can I give you? What sort of posts have I got? You are a queer set of people!” he went on aloud in a tone as though he were giving me a lecture. “A score of you keep coming to me every day; you imagine I am the head of a department! I am constructing a railway-line, my friends; I have employment for heavy labour: I need mechanics, smiths, navvies, carpenters, well-sinkers, and none of you can do anything but sit and write! You are all clerks.”
And he seemed to me to have the same air of happiness as his rugs and easy chairs. He was stout26 and healthy, ruddy-cheeked and broad-chested, in a print cotton shirt and full trousers like a toy china sledge-driver. He had a curly, round beard—and not a single grey hair—a hooked nose, and clear, dark, guileless eyes.
“What can you do?” he went on. “There is nothing you can do! I am an engineer. I am a man of an assured position, but before they gave me a railway-line I was for years in harness; I have been a practical mechanic. For two years I worked in Belgium as an oiler. You can judge for yourself, my dear fellow, what kind of work can I offer you?”
“Of course that is so . . .” I muttered in extreme confusion, unable to face his clear, guileless eyes.
“Can you work the telegraph, any way?” he asked, after a moment’s thought.
“Yes, I have been a telegraph clerk.”
“Hm! Well, we will see then. Meanwhile, go to Dubetchnya. I have got a fellow there, but he is a wretched creature.”
“And what will my duties consist of?” I asked.
“We shall see. Go there; meanwhile I will make arrangements. Only please don’t get drunk, and don’t worry me with requests of any sort, or I shall send you packing.”
He turned away from me without even a nod.
I bowed to him and his daughter who was reading a newspaper, and went away. My heart felt so heavy, that when my sister began asking me how the engineer had received me, I could not utter a single word.
I got up early in the morning, at sunrise, to go to Dubetchnya. There was not a soul in our Great Dvoryansky Street; everyone was asleep, and my footsteps rang out with a solitary27, hollow sound. The poplars, covered with dew, filled the air with soft fragrance. I was sad, and did not want to go away from the town. I was fond of my native town. It seemed to be so beautiful and so snug28! I loved the fresh greenery, the still, sunny morning, the chiming of our bells; but the people with whom I lived in this town were boring, alien to me, sometimes even repulsive29. I did not like them nor understand them.
I did not understand what these sixty-five thousand people lived for and by. I knew that Kimry lived by boots, that Tula made samovars and guns, that Odessa was a sea-port, but what our town was, and what it did, I did not know. Great Dvoryansky Street and the two other smartest streets lived on the interest of capital, or on salaries received by officials from the public treasury30; but what the other eight streets, which ran parallel for over two miles and vanished beyond the hills, lived upon, was always an insoluble riddle31 to me. And the way those people lived one is ashamed to describe! No garden, no theatre, no decent band; the public library and the club library were only visited by Jewish youths, so that the magazines and new books lay for months uncut; rich and well-educated people slept in close, stuffy32 bedrooms, on wooden bedsteads infested33 with bugs34; their children were kept in revoltingly dirty rooms called nurseries, and the servants, even the old and respected ones, slept on the floor in the kitchen, covered with rags. On ordinary days the houses smelt35 of beetroot soup, and on fast days of sturgeon cooked in sunflower oil. The food was not good, and the drinking water was unwholesome. In the town council, at the governor’s, at the head priest’s, on all sides in private houses, people had been saying for years and years that our town had not a good and cheap water-supply, and that it was necessary to obtain a loan of two hundred thousand from the Treasury for laying on water; very rich people, of whom three dozen could have been counted up in our town, and who at times lost whole estates at cards, drank the polluted water, too, and talked all their lives with great excitement of a loan for the water-supply—and I did not understand that; it seemed to me it would have been simpler to take the two hundred thousand out of their own pockets and lay it out on that object.
I did not know one honest man in the town. My father took bribes36, and imagined that they were given him out of respect for his moral qualities; at the high school, in order to be moved up rapidly from class to class, the boys went to board with their teachers, who charged them exorbitant37 sums; the wife of the military commander took bribes from the recruits when they were called up before the board and even deigned38 to accept refreshments39 from them, and on one occasion could not get up from her knees in church because she was drunk; the doctors took bribes, too, when the recruits came up for examination, and the town doctor and the veterinary surgeon levied40 a regular tax on the butchers’ shops and the restaurants; at the district school they did a trade in certificates, qualifying for partial exemption41 from military service; the higher clergy42 took bribes from the humbler priests and from the church elders; at the Municipal, the Artisans’, and all the other Boards every petitioner43 was pursued by a shout: “Don’t forget your thanks!” and the petitioner would turn back to give sixpence or a shilling. And those who did not take bribes, such as the higher officials of the Department of Justice, were haughty44, offered two fingers instead of shaking hands, were distinguished45 by the frigidity46 and narrowness of their judgments47, spent a great deal of time over cards, drank to excess, married heiresses, and undoubtedly48 had a pernicious corrupting49 influence on those around them. It was only the girls who had still the fresh fragrance of moral purity; most of them had higher impulses, pure and honest hearts; but they had no understanding of life, and believed that bribes were given out of respect for moral qualities, and after they were married grew old quickly, let themselves go completely, and sank hopelessly in the mire50 of vulgar, petty bourgeois51 existence.
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1
devoted
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| adj.忠诚的，忠实的，热心的，献身于...的 | |
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2
theatricals
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| n.（业余性的）戏剧演出，舞台表演艺术；职业演员；戏剧的( theatrical的名词复数 )；剧场的；炫耀的；戏剧性的 | |
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3
tableaux
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| n.舞台造型，（由活人扮演的）静态画面、场面；人构成的画面或场景( tableau的名词复数 )；舞台造型；戏剧性的场面；绚丽的场景 | |
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eldest
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| adj.最年长的，最年老的 | |
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rehearsals
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| n.练习( rehearsal的名词复数 )；排练；复述；重复 | |
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rehearsal
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| n.排练，排演；练习 | |
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7
entrusted
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| v.委托，托付( entrust的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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aloof
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| adj.远离的；冷淡的，漠不关心的 | |
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9
contractor
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| n.订约人，承包人，收缩肌 | |
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afflicted
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| 使受痛苦，折磨( afflict的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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11
malady
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| n.病，疾病(通常做比喻) | |
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12
rumours
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| n.传闻( rumour的名词复数 )；风闻；谣言；谣传 | |
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13
fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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14
muffled
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| adj.（声音）被隔的；听不太清的；（衣服）裹严的；蒙住的v.压抑，捂住( muffle的过去式和过去分词 )；用厚厚的衣帽包着（自己） | |
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15
devout
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| adj.虔诚的，虔敬的，衷心的 (n.devoutness) | |
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16
superstitions
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| 迷信，迷信行为( superstition的名词复数 ) | |
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undertakings
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| 企业( undertaking的名词复数 )； 保证； 殡仪业； 任务 | |
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18
astounding
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| adj.使人震惊的vt.使震惊，使大吃一惊astound的现在分词) | |
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19
standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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20
distress
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| n.苦恼，痛苦，不舒适；不幸；vt.使悲痛 | |
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21
costly
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| adj.昂贵的，价值高的，豪华的 | |
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22
scattered
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| adj.分散的，稀疏的；散步的；疏疏落落的 | |
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23
bouquet
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| n.花束，酒香 | |
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24
fragrance
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| n.芬芳，香味，香气 | |
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25
attained
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| （通常经过努力）实现( attain的过去式和过去分词 )； 达到； 获得； 达到（某年龄、水平、状况） | |
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27
solitary
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| adj.孤独的，独立的，荒凉的；n.隐士 | |
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28
snug
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| adj.温暖舒适的，合身的，安全的；v.使整洁干净，舒适地依靠，紧贴；n.（英）酒吧里的私房 | |
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29
repulsive
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| adj.排斥的，使人反感的 | |
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30
treasury
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| n.宝库；国库，金库；文库 | |
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31
riddle
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| n.谜，谜语，粗筛；vt.解谜，给…出谜，筛，检查，鉴定，非难，充满于；vi.出谜 | |
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32
stuffy
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| adj.不透气的，闷热的 | |
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33
infested
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| adj.为患的，大批滋生的（常与with搭配）v.害虫、野兽大批出没于( infest的过去式和过去分词 )；遍布于 | |
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34
bugs
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| adj.疯狂的，发疯的n.窃听器( bug的名词复数 )；病菌；虫子；[计算机]（制作软件程序所产生的意料不到的）错误 | |
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35
smelt
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| v.熔解，熔炼；n.银白鱼，胡瓜鱼 | |
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36
bribes
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| n.贿赂( bribe的名词复数 )；向（某人）行贿，贿赂v.贿赂( bribe的第三人称单数 )；向（某人）行贿，贿赂 | |
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37
exorbitant
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| adj.过分的；过度的 | |
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38
deigned
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| v.屈尊，俯就( deign的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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39
refreshments
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| n.点心,便餐;(会议后的)简单茶点招 待 | |
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40
levied
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| 征（兵）( levy的过去式和过去分词 )； 索取； 发动（战争）； 征税 | |
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41
exemption
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| n.豁免，免税额，免除 | |
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42
clergy
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| n.[总称]牧师，神职人员 | |
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43
petitioner
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| n.请愿人 | |
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44
haughty
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| adj.傲慢的，高傲的 | |
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45
distinguished
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| adj.卓越的，杰出的，著名的 | |
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46
frigidity
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| n.寒冷；冷淡；索然无味；（尤指妇女的）性感缺失 | |
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47
judgments
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| 判断( judgment的名词复数 )； 鉴定； 评价； 审判 | |
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48
undoubtedly
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| adv.确实地，无疑地 | |
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49
corrupting
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| （使）败坏( corrupt的现在分词 )； （使）腐化； 引起（计算机文件等的）错误； 破坏 | |
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50
mire
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| n.泥沼，泥泞；v.使...陷于泥泞，使...陷入困境 | |
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51
bourgeois
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| adj./n.追求物质享受的(人)；中产阶级分子 | |
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