Chapter 38

"Had I best be going now, sir?" Abominably¹ shy, Maurice pretended not to hear.

"We mustn't fall asleep though, awkward if anyone came in," he continued, with a pleasant blurred² laugh that made Maurice feel friendly but at the same time diffident and sad. He man-aged to reply, "You mustn't call me sir," and the laugh sounded again, as if brushing aside such problems. There seemed to be charm and insight, yet his discomfort³ increased.

"May I ask your name?" he said awkwardly.

"I'm Scudder."

"I know you're Scudder—I meant your other name."

"Only Alec just."

"Jolly name to have."

"It's only my name."

"I'm called Maurice."

"I saw you when you first drove up, Mr Hall, wasn't it Tues-day, I did think you looked at me angry and gentle both to-gether."

"Who were those people with you?" said Maurice, after a pause.

"Oh that wor only Mill, that wor Milly's cousin. Then do you remember the piano got wet the same evening, and you had great trouble to suit yourself over a book, didn't read it, did you either."

"How ever did you know I didn't read my book?"

"Saw you leaning out of the window instead. I saw you the next night too. I was out on the lawn."

"Do you mean you were out in all that infernal rain?"

"Yes .. . watching ... oh, that's nothing, you've got to watch, haven't you . . . see, I've not much longer in this country, that's how I kep putting it."

"How beastly I was to you this morning!"

"Oh that's nothing—Excuse the question but is that door locked?"

"I'll lock it." As he did so, the feeling of awkwardness re-turned. Whither was he tending, from Clive into what compan-ionship?

Presently they fell asleep.

They slept separate at first, as if proximity⁴ harassed⁵ them, but towards morning a movement began, and they woke deep in each other's arms. "Had I best be going now?" he repeated, but Maurice, through whose earlier night had threaded the dream "Something is a little wrong and had better be," was resting ut-terly at last, and murmured "No, no."

"Sir, the church has gone four, you'll have to release me."

"Maurice, I'm Maurice."

"But the church has—"

"Damn the church."

He said, "I've the cricket pitch to help roll for the match," but did not move, and seemed in the faint gray light to be smil-ing proudly. "I have the young birds too—the boat's done—Mr London and Mr Fetherstonhaugh dived splack into the water lilies—they told me all young gentlemen can dive—I never learned to. It seems more natural like not to let the head get under the water. I call that drowning before your day."

"I was taught I'd be ill if I didn't wet my hair."

"Well, you was taught what wasn't the case."

"I expect so—it's a piece with all else I was taught. A master I used to trust as a kid taught me it. I can still remember walk-ing on the beach with him ... oh dear! And the tide came up, all beastly gray . . ." He shook himself fully⁶ awake, as he felt his companion slip from him. "Don't, why did you?"

"There's the cricket—"

"No, there's not the cricket—You're going abroad."

"Well, well find another opportunity before I do."

"If you'll stop, I'll tell you my dream. I dreamt of an old grandfather of mine. He was a queer card. I wonder what you'd have made of him. He used to think dead people went to the sun, but he treated his own employees badly."

"I dreamt the Reverend Borenius was trying to drown me, and now really I must go, I can't talk about dreams, don't you see, or I'll catch it from Mr Ayres."

"Did you ever dream you'd a friend, Alec? Nothing else but just 'my friend', he trying to help you and you him. A friend," he repeated, sentimental⁷ suddenly. "Someone to last your whole life and you his. I suppose such a thing can't really happen out-side sleep."

But the moment for speech had passed. Class was calling, the crack in the floor must reopen at sunrise. When he reached the window Maurice called, "Scudder," and he turned like a well-trained dog.

"Alec, you're a dear fellow and we've been very happy."

"You get some sleep, there's no hurry in your case," he said kindly⁸, and took up the gun that had guarded them through the night. The tips of the ladder quivered against the dawn as he descended⁹, then were motionless. There was a tiny crackle from the gravel¹⁰, a tiny clink from the fence that divided garden and park: then all was as if nothing had been, and silence absolute filled the Russet Room, broken after a time by the sounds of a new day.

“我是不是这会儿最好走掉呢，老爷？”

莫瑞斯羞怯到了极点，假装没听见。

“不过，咱们可不能睡着了，要是什么人进来了，就糟了。”他一边愉快地窃笑着，一边接下去说。莫瑞斯虽然感到亲切，同时又胆怯悲哀。他好歹回答道：“别叫我老爷。”再一次传来了笑声，好像对这类问题表示漠视似的。对方仿佛有魅力与悟性，然而他越来越不自在了。

“请问你的大名？”他笨嘴拙舌地说。

“我叫斯卡德。”

“我知道你姓斯卡德——我指的是你的名字。”

“就叫阿列克。”

“好名字。”

“我就叫这个名字。”

“我叫莫瑞斯。”

“你头一次坐马车来，我就看见你了，霍尔先生。记得那是星期二，我觉得你看我的时候，又生气，又和气。”

“跟你在一块儿的都是谁呀？”莫瑞斯踌躇了一下才问。

“啊，就是米尔呗，还有一个是米利的表妹。你记得吗？那天晚上钢琴淋湿了，你费了很大劲儿去找一本中意的书，可你并没有读。”

“你怎么知道我没有读我那本书？”

“我看见你从窗口探出身去。第二天晚上，我也瞧见你了。我待在外面的草坪上来着。”

“你的意思是说，下着倾盆大雨，你竟然还到外面去了吗？”

“是啊……守望着……哦，这不算什么。你得守望着，不是吗……你知道，我在这个国家待不了多久了，所以得好好看看。”

“今天早晨我对你太粗野了！”

“哦，没什么——请原谅我这么问：那扇门上锁了吗？”

“我去把它锁上。”他正这么做的时候，胆怯的感觉重新袭上心头。他在朝什么方向走？离开克莱夫，要去跟什么人做伴呢？

他们二人旋即入睡了。

起初他们是分开来睡的，好像一挨近就会受到骚扰似的，然而天刚蒙蒙亮动作就开始了，醒来的时候已经紧紧地搂抱在一起。“我是不是最好这会儿就走掉呢？”他一遍遍地说。尽管上半夜莫瑞斯梦中的思路是：“某件事有点儿不对头，随它去吧。”然而他的心情终干完全平静了，于是附耳私语：“不，不。”

“老爷，教堂的钟已经敲了四下，你得放我走了。”

“莫瑞斯，我叫莫瑞斯。”

“可教堂——”

“管他妈的教堂呢。”

他嘴上说：“为了板球赛，我还得帮助把球场辗平呢。”但是一动也不动，在灰色微光下，似乎面带自豪的笑容。“我还得照料那些雏鸟——小船已收拾停当了——伦敦先生和费瑟斯顿先生一个猛子扎到荷花当中去了——他们告诉我，所有的年轻绅士都会潜水——我从来也没学会。不让头进到水里，好像更自然一些。我把这叫做没到寿数已尽的时候就淹死。”

“有人教我说，如果不把头发弄湿，我就会生病。”

“啊，人家教给你的不是那么一回事。”

“敢情——这不过是其中的一桩而已。这是我还是个孩子的时候一向信赖的老师教给我的。我至今记得跟他一道沿着海滩散步的事……天呀！潮水冲过来了，四下里暗得要命……”当他觉察出伙伴正从他身边溜走的时候，就战栗了一下，清醒过来了。“你为什么要走？”

“板球那件事——”

“不，不是板球——你要到海外去。”

“唷，我动身以前，咱们还能另外找个机会。”

“你要是待在这儿，我就把我做的梦讲给你听。我梦见了我那个老外祖父，他是一位别有风趣的怪人。我倒想知道，倘若你见了他，会作何感想。他向来认为，人死后就到太阳那儿去。然而，他对待手下的雇员很苛刻。”

“我梦见博雷尼乌斯大师试图把我淹死。这会儿我真得走啦a我不能谈什么梦，你难道不知道吗？不然的话，艾尔斯先生就会骂我的。”

“阿列克，你梦见过自己有个朋友吗？仅仅是‘我的朋友’，别的什么都不是，相互帮助。一个朋友。”他重复了一遍，突然充满了柔情。“彼此间的友情持续终生。我料想这样的事是不可能真正发生的，除非是在睡梦中。”

然而，聊天的时间已经过去了。阶级在呼唤，随着日出，地板上的缝儿又裂开了。当他走到窗口的时候，莫瑞斯喊道：“斯卡德。”他就像是一头训练有素的狗似的转过身来。

“阿列克，你是个好样儿的，咱们两个人都感到非常满足。”

“你睡会儿吧，你这方面用不着匆匆忙忙的。”他和善地说，并拿起彻夜保护过他们的那杆枪。梯子的顶端在曙光中微微颤动，随后一动也不动了。踏在沙砾上那轻微的“咯吱咯吱”声，把庭园与庄园隔开来的那道篱笆“喀嗒”一声响了。随后，绝对的静寂充满了赤褐屋，就好像什么都不曾发生过似的。过了半晌，新的一天的噪声划破了沉静。

1 abominably   

adv. 可恶地，可恨地，恶劣地

参考例句：

• From her own point of view Barbara had behaved abominably. 在她看来，芭芭拉的表现是恶劣的。
• He wanted to know how abominably they could behave towards him. 他希望能知道他们能用什么样的卑鄙手段来对付他。

2 blurred   

v.（使）变模糊( blur的过去式和过去分词 )；（使）难以区分；模模糊糊；迷离

参考例句：

• She suffered from dizziness and blurred vision. 她饱受头晕目眩之苦。
• Their lazy, blurred voices fell pleasantly on his ears. 他们那种慢吞吞、含糊不清的声音在他听起来却很悦耳。 来自《简明英汉词典》

3 discomfort   

n.不舒服，不安，难过，困难，不方便

参考例句：

• One has to bear a little discomfort while travelling.旅行中总要忍受一点不便。
• She turned red with discomfort when the teacher spoke.老师讲话时她不好意思地红着脸。

4 proximity   

n.接近，邻近

参考例句：

• Marriages in proximity of blood are forbidden by the law.法律规定禁止近亲结婚。
• Their house is in close proximity to ours.他们的房子很接近我们的。

5 harassed   

adj. 疲倦的，厌烦的 动词harass的过去式和过去分词

参考例句：

• He has complained of being harassed by the police. 他投诉受到警方侵扰。
• harassed mothers with their children 带着孩子的疲惫不堪的母亲们

6 fully   

adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地

参考例句：

• The doctor asked me to breathe in,then to breathe out fully.医生让我先吸气，然后全部呼出。
• They soon became fully integrated into the local community.他们很快就完全融入了当地人的圈子。

7 sentimental   

adj.多愁善感的，感伤的

参考例句：

• She's a sentimental woman who believes marriage comes by destiny.她是多愁善感的人，她相信姻缘命中注定。
• We were deeply touched by the sentimental movie.我们深深被那感伤的电影所感动。

8 kindly   

adj.和蔼的，温和的，爽快的；adv.温和地，亲切地

参考例句：

• Her neighbours spoke of her as kindly and hospitable.她的邻居都说她和蔼可亲、热情好客。
• A shadow passed over the kindly face of the old woman.一道阴影掠过老太太慈祥的面孔。

9 descended   

a.为...后裔的，出身于...的

参考例句：

• A mood of melancholy descended on us. 一种悲伤的情绪袭上我们的心头。
• The path descended the hill in a series of zigzags. 小路呈连续的之字形顺着山坡蜿蜒而下。

10 gravel   

n.砂跞；砂砾层；结石

参考例句：

• We bought six bags of gravel for the garden path.我们购买了六袋碎石用来铺花园的小路。
• More gravel is needed to fill the hollow in the drive.需要更多的砾石来填平车道上的坑洼。