"Children are rrree-volting!" screamed The Grand High Witch. "Vee vill vipe them all avay!
Vee vill scrrrub them off the face of the earth! Vee vill flush them down the drain!"
"Yes, yes!" chanted the audience. "Wipe them away! Scrub them off the earth! Flush them
down the drain!"
"Children are foul2 and filthy3!" thundered The Grand High Witch.
"They are! They are!" chorused the English witches. "They are foul and filthy!"
"Children are dirty and stinky!" screamed The Grand High Witch.
"Dirty and stinky!" cried the audience, getting more and more worked up.
"Children are smelling of dogs' drrroppings!" screeched4 The Grand High Witch.
"Pooooooo!" cried the audience. "Pooooooo! Pooooooo! Pooooooo!"
"They are vurse than dogs' drrroppings!" screeched The Grand High Witch. "Dogs'
drrroppings is smelling like violets and prrrimroses compared vith children!"
"Violets and primroses5!" chanted the audience. They were clapping and cheering almost
every word spoken from the platform. The speaker seemed to have them completely under her spell.
"To talk about children is making me sick!" screamed The Grand High Witch. "I am feeling
sick even thinking about them! Fetch me a basin!"
The Grand High Witch paused and glared at the mass of eager faces in the audience. They
waited, wanting more.
"So now!" barked The Grand High Witch. "So now I am having a plan! I am having a
giganticus plan for getting rrrid of every single child in the whole of Inkland!"
The witches gasped7. They gaped8. They turned and gave each other ghoulish grins of
excitement.
"Yes!" thundered The Grand High Witch. "Vee shall svish them and svollop them and vee
shall make to disappear every single smelly little brrrat in Inkland in vun strrroke!"
"Whoopee!" cried the witches, clapping their hands. "You are brilliant, O Your Grandness!
You are fantabulous!"
"Shut up and listen!" snapped The Grand High Witch. "Listen very carefully and let us not be
having any muck-ups!"
The audience leaned forward, eager to learn how this magic was going to be performed.
"Each and every vun of you", thundered The Grand High Witch, "is to go back to your home
towns immediately and rrree-sign from your jobs. Rrree-sign! Give notice! Rrree-tire!"
"We will!" they cried. "We will resign from our jobs!"
"And after you have rrree-signed from your jobs," The Grand High Witch went on, "each and
every vuri of you vill be going out and you vill be buying... " She paused.
"What will we be buying?" they cried. "Tell us, O Brilliant One, what is it we shall be
buying?"
"Sveet-shops!" shouted The Grand High Witch.
"Sweet-shops!" they cried. "We are going to buy sweet-shops! What a frumptious wheeze9!"
"Each of you vill be buying for herself a sveetshop. You vill be buying the very best and most
rrree-spectable sweet-shops in Inkland."
"We will! We will!" they answered. Their dreadful voices were like a chorus of dentists' drills
all grinding away together.
"I am vonting no tuppenny- ha'penny crrrummy little tobacco- selling- newspaper- sweet-
shops!" shouted The Grand High Witch. "I am vonting you to get only the very best shops filled up
high with piles and piles of luscious10 sweets and tasty chocs!"
"The best!" they cried. "We shall buy the best sweet-shops in town!"
"You will be having no trouble in getting vot you wont," shouted The Grand High Witch,
"because you will be offering four times as much as a shop is vurth and nobody is rrree-fusing an
offer like that! Money is not a prrroblem to us witches as you know very well. I have brrrought with
me six trrrunks stuffed full of Inklish banknotes, all new and crrrisp. And all of them," she added with
a fiendish leer, "all of them homemade."
The witches in the audience grinned, appreciating this joke.
At that point, one foolish witch got so excited at the possibilities presented by owning a
sweetshop that she leapt to her feet and shouted, "The children will come flocking to my shop and I
will feed them poisoned sweets and poisoned chocs and wipe them all out like weasels!"
The room became suddenly silent. I saw the tiny body of The Grand High Witch stiffen11 and
then go rigid12 with rage. "Who spoke6? " she shrieked13. "It vos you! You over there!"
The culprit sat down fast and covered her face with her clawed hands.
"You blithering bumpkin!" screeched The Grand High Witch. "You brrrainless bogvumper!
Are you not rrree-alising that if you are going rrround poisoning little children you vill be caught in
five minutes flat? Never in my life am I hearing such a boshvolloping suggestion coming from a
vitch!"
The entire audience cowered14 and shook. I'm quite sure they all thought, as I did, that the
terrible white-hot sparks were about to start flying again.
Curiously15 enough, they didn't.
'If such a tomfiddling idea is all you can be coming up vith," thundered The Grand High
Witch, "then it is no vunder Inkland is still svorming vith rrrotten little children!"
There was another silence. The Grand High Witch glared at the witches in the audience. "Do
you not know", she shouted at them, "that vee witches are vurrrking only with magic?"
"We know, Your Grandness!" they all answered.
"Of course we know!"
The Grand High Witch grated her bony gloved hands against each other and cried out, "So
each of you is owning a magnificent sweet-shop! The next move is that each of you will be
announcing in the window of your shop that on a certain day you will be having a Great Gala
Opening with frree sweets and chocs to every child!"
"That will bring them in, the greedy little brutes16!" cried the audience. "They'll be fighting to
get through the doors!"
"Next," continued The Grand High Witch, "you will prepare yourselves for this Great Gala
Opening by filling every choc and every sweet in your shop with my very latest and grrreatest magic
formula! This is known as FORMULA 86 DELAYED ACTION MOUSE-MAKER!"
"Delayed Action Mouse- Maker!" they chanted. "She's done it again! Her Grandness has
concocted17 yet another of her wondrous18 magic child-killers! How do we make it, O Brilliant One?"
"Exercise patience," answered The Grand High Witch. "First, I am explaining to you how my
Formula 86 Delayed Action Mouse-Maker is vurrrking. Listen carefully."
"We are listening!" cried the audience who were now jumping up and down in their chairs
with excitement.
"Delayed Action Mouse-Maker is a green liqvid," explained The Grand High Witch, "and vun
droplet19 in each choc or sveet vill be qvite enough. So here is vot happens:
"Child eats choc vich has in it Delayed Action Mouse-Maker liqvid...
"Child goes home feeling fine...
"Child goes to bed, still feeling fine...
"Child vakes up in the morning still okay...
"Child goes to school still feeling fine...
"Formula, you understand, is delayed action, and is not vurrrking yet."
"We understand, O Brainy One!" cried the audience. "But when does it start working?"
"It is starting to vurrrk at exactly nine o'clock, vhen the child is arriving at school!" shouted
The Grand High Witch triumphantly20. "Child arrives at school. Delayed Action Mouse- Maker
immediately starts to vurrrk. Child starts to shrrrink. Child is starting to grow fur. Child is starting to
grow tail. All is happening in prrreecisely tventy-six seconds. After tventy-six seconds, child is not a
child any longer. It is a mouse!"
"A mouse!" cried the witches. "What a frumptious thought!"
"Classrooms vill all be svorrrming vith mice!" shouted The Grand High Witch. "Chaos21 and
pandemonium22 vill be rrreigning in every school in Inkland! Teachers vill be hopping23 up and down!
Vimmen teachers vill be standing24 on desks and holding up skirts and yelling, 'Help, help, help!' "
"They will! They will!" cried the audience.
"And vot", shouted The Grand High Witch, "is happening next in every school?"
"Tell us!" they cried. "Tell us, O Brainy One!"
The Grand High Witch stretched her stringy neck forward and grinned at the audience,
showing two rows of pointed25 teeth, slightly blue. She raised her voice louder than ever and shouted,
"Mouse-trrraps is coming out!"
"Mouse-traps!" cried the witches.
"And cheese!" shouted The Grand High Witch "Teachers is all rrrushing and rrrunning out
and getting mouse-trrraps and baiting them vith cheese and putting them down all over school! Mice
is nibbling26 cheese! Mouse-trrraps is going off! All over school, mouse-trrraps is going snappety-snap
and mouse-heads is rrrolling across the floors like marbles! All over Inkland, in everrry school in
Inkland, noise of snapping mouse-trrraps vill be heard!"
At this point, the disgusting old Grand High Witch began to do a sort of witch's dance up and
down the platform, stamping her feet and clapping her hands. The entire audience joined in the
clapping and the foot-stamping. They were making such a tremendous racket that I thought surely Mr
Stringer would hear it and come banging at the door. But he didn't. Then, above all the noise, I heard
the voice of The Grand High Witch screaming out some sort of an awful gloating song,
"Down vith children! Do them in!
Boil their bones and fry their skin!
Bish them, sqvish them, bash them, mash27 them!
Brrreak them, shake them, slash28 them, smash them!
Offer chocs vith magic powder!
Say 'Eat up!' then say it louder.
Crrram them full of sticky eats,
Send them home still guzzling29 sveets.
And in the morning little fools
Go marching off to separate schools.
A girl feels sick and goes all pale.
She yells, 'Hey look! I've grrrown a tail!'
A boy who's standing next to her
Screams, 'Help! I think I'm grrrowing fur!'
Another shouts, Wee look like frrreaks!
There's viskers growing on our cheeks!'
A boy who vos extremely tall
Cries out, 'Vot's wrong? I'm grrrowing small!'
Four tiny legs begin to sprrrout
From everybody rrround about.
And all at vunce, all in a trrrice,
There are no children! Only mice!
In every school is mice galore
All rerunning rrround the school-rrroom floor!
And all the poor demented teachers
Is yelling, 'Hey, who are these crrreatures?'
They stand upon the desks and shout,
'Get out, you filthy mice! Get out!
Vill someone fetch some mouse-trrraps, please!
And don't forrrget to bring the cheese!'
Now mouse-trrraps come and every trrrap
Goes snippy-snip and snappy-snap.
The mouse-trrraps have a powerful spring,
The springs go crack and snap and ping!
Is lovely noise for us to hear!
Is music to a vitch's ear!
Dead mice is every place arrround,
Piled two feet deep upon the grrround,
Vith teachers searching left and aright,
But not a single child in sight!
The teachers cry, 'Vot's going on?
Oh vhere have all the children gone?
Is half-past nine and as a rrrule
They're never late as this for school!'
Poor teachers don't know vot to do.
Some sit and rrread, and just a few
Amuse themselves throughout the day
By sveeping all the mice avay.
AND ALL US VITCHES SHOUT HOORAY!"
86号配方慢性变鼠药
“小孩子最讨厌！”女巫大王叫道，“我们要把他们全部消灭！我们要把他们从地球上抹
去！我们要把他们全冲到阴沟里！”
“对，对！”听众附和着说，“全消灭掉！从地球上全抹去！全冲到阴沟里！”
“小孩子又丑又讨厌！”女巫大王声如巨雷。
“是的，是的！”英国女巫们同声叫道，“他们又丑又讨厌！”
“小孩子又脏又臭！”女巫大王叫道。
“又脏又臭！”听众越来越使劲地附和。
“小孩子有狗屎味！”女巫大王尖叫。
“呸——！”听众叫道，“呸——！呸——！呸——！”
“他们比狗屎还臭！”女巫大王叫道，“狗屎比起孩子来还有紫罗兰和樱草花味！”
“紫罗兰和樱草花味！”听众同声说。讲坛上的人每说一个字她们几乎都鼓掌欢呼。演讲
人好像用咒语把她们完全迷住了。
“提到孩子就使我作呕！”女巫大王叫道，“连想到孩子都使我作呕！给我个痰盂！”
女巫大王暂停片刻，看着听众焦急的脸。她们等着，要听下去。
“好，”女巫大王吠叫道，“现在我想出了一个计划！我想出了一个庞大的计划，要消灭掉
英国儿童，消灭得一个也不剩！”
女巫们喘气。她们喘起了气。她们转脸相互兴奋地狞笑。
“是的！”女巫大王像打雷一样叫着，“我们要杀死他们，干掉他们。我们要一下子消灭全
英国每一个臭气扑鼻的小鬼头！”
“万岁！”女巫们拍手大叫，“你真了不起，噢，大王！你真出色！”
“闭嘴听着！”女巫大王厉声说，“仔细听着，不要有任何差错！”
听众俯身向前，急于知道这把戏怎么变。
“你们每一个马上回到自己的城镇，”女巫大王又打雷般地叫道，“辞去你们的职务。辞
职！通知！退休！”
“遵命！”她们叫道，“我们辞去我们的职务！”
“辞去职务以后，”女巫大王说下去，“你们每人都要去买……”她停下来。
“我们去买什么？”她们叫道，“告诉我们，大王，我们去买什么？”
“糖果店！”女巫大王叫道。
“糖果店！”她们跟着叫，“我们去买糖果店！多么妙的俏皮话！”
“真的，你们各买一家糖果店。你们买下全英国最好和最出名的糖果店。”
“遵命！遵命！”她们答道。她们可怕的声音像是牙科医生们的钻孔机同时开动一样。
“我不是指兼卖香烟报纸的那种小糖果店！”女巫大王叫道，“我要你们只买那些陈列高级
糖果和美味巧克力的最好的糖果店！”
“最好的！”她们叫道，“我们买下城里最好的糖果店！”
“你们买它们一点也不难，”女巫大王叫道，“因为你出四倍于那个店的价钱。这个价钱是
没有人不肯卖的！你们很清楚，钱对我们女巫来说不成问题。我带来了六大旅行箱的英国钞
票，都是崭新的。所有钞票，”她恶毒地斜眼瞥了一下，加上一句，“所有钞票都是自制的。”
听着的女巫全都龇牙咧嘴笑，很欣赏这句俏皮话。
这时候，一个傻呼呼的女巫对于拥有一家糖果店会带来的好处感到太兴奋了，跳起身大
叫起来：“孩子们会成群结队地来我的糖果店，我给他们有毒的糖果和有毒的巧克力，把他们
像鼬鼠一样全毒死！”
整个房间的女巫猛地静了下来。我看见女巫大王的小身体僵住不动了，接着她气得板起
了脸。“这话是谁说的？”她叫道，“是你！是那边的你！”
那说错话的女巫赶紧坐下，用她带爪子的手捂住脸。
“你这个胡说八道的土头土脑的家伙！”女巫大王叫道，“你这个没有头脑的笨蛋！你不明
白吗，你这样毒死孩子会马上被捉住的？我活到今天还没听见过一个女巫会说出这种废话
来！”
全体听众簌簌发抖。我断定她们都和我想得一样：可怕的白热火花又要喷出来了。
奇怪的是它们没有喷出来。
“如果你们想出来的只是这种馊主意，”女巫大王打雷般叫道，“难怪英国仍然还满是那些
该死的小鬼呢！”
又是一阵静寂。女巫大王看着在谛听的女巫们。“你们难道不知道，”她对她们嚷嚷
道，“我们女巫干什么都只用魔法吗？”
“我们知道，大王！”她们全体回答，“我们当然知道！”
女巫大王擦着她戴手套的瘦骨嶙峋的双手叫起来：“好，现在你们每一个都有了一家头等
糖果店！你们下一步就是在糖果店橱窗上贴出通告，定在某天隆重开张，向每一个小朋友免
费赠送糖果和巧克力！”
“那些馋嘴小鬼要拥进店里来了，”听众叫道，“他们要你争我夺地抢着进门了！”
“接下来，”女巫大王说下去，“为了隆重开张，你们在你们的店里摆满用我最新最伟大的
魔法配方制成的糖果和巧克力！这就是‘86号配方慢性变鼠药’！”
“慢性变鼠药！”她们重复着叫道，“她又想出新花样了！大王又调制出她另一种了不起的
消灭儿童的魔药了！我们怎么配制呢，噢，至高无上的大王？”
“要有耐心，”女巫大王回答说，“首先，我向你们解释我的‘86号配方慢性变鼠药’是怎么
用的。仔细听好了。”
“我们听好了！”听众叫着说。现在她们激动得在她们的椅子那里蹦蹦跳。
“‘慢性变鼠药’是一种药水，”女巫大王说，“在每颗巧克力或糖果上放一小滴就够了。使
用情况如下：
“小孩吃下放有‘慢性变鼠药’的巧克力……
“小孩回家时感觉良好……
“小孩上床时仍旧感觉良好……
“小孩第二天早晨醒来时依然没事……
“小孩上学时还是感觉良好……
“你们要明白，这药是慢慢起作用的，还没到时候。”
“我们明白，聪明透顶的大王！”听众叫道，“但它什么时候开始起作用呢？”
“它在九点钟准时起作用，就在那孩子到学校的时候！”女巫大王得意地叫道，“孩子来到
学校，‘慢性变鼠药’就立刻起作用了。他开始缩小。他开始长毛。他开始长尾巴。全部过程在
二十六秒钟内完成。二十六秒钟后，这孩子就再也不是个孩子了。他成了一只老鼠！”
“一只老鼠！”女巫们叫道，“多么妙的主意！”
“所有的教室里将满是老鼠！”女巫大王叫道，“英国所有的学校将发生一场大乱！男老师
们蹦蹦跳跳！女老师们都站到写字台上，撩起裙边大叫，‘救命啊，救命啊，救命啊！’”
“他们会这样的！他们会这样的！”听众大叫。
“再接下来，”女巫大王叫道，“每个学校还会发生什么事呢？”
“告诉我们吧！”她们叫道，“告诉我们吧，噢，聪明的大王！”
女巫大王向前伸出她青筋暴出的脖子，对听众怪笑，露出两排有点蓝的尖牙。她把声音
提得更高，叫道：“老鼠夹出台了！”
“老鼠夹！”女巫们叫道。
“还有干酪！”女巫大王叫道，“教师们全跑出去找来老鼠夹，用干酪做诱饵，放满整个学
校！老鼠们吃干酪！老鼠夹弹起来！整座学校里的老鼠夹劈劈啪啪响，老鼠头一个个像玻璃
弹子一样满地滚！在整个英国，在整个英国的每一所学校里，都会听到老鼠夹的劈劈啪啪
声。”
说到这里，可恶的女巫老大王开始在讲坛上跳女巫的舞蹈，蹦蹦跳，顿脚，拍手。全体
听众跟着拍手顿脚。她们发出那么大的声音，我想斯特林杰先生会听见，并且来敲门的，但
是他没有来。
接着，在一片吵声中，我听见女巫大王尖声唱起一支可怕的扬扬得意的歌：
打倒孩子！骗他们上钩！
油炸他们的皮，煮他们的骨头！
摇撼他们，压扁他们，砸烂他们，捣烂他们！
揍死他们，打死他们，砍死他们，粉碎他们！
送给他们有毒的巧克力！
对他们大声说：“吃下去！”
让他们吃着糖回家里。
早晨这些小傻猫，
上他们各自的学校。
一个女孩想吐，满脸苍白，
她叫道：“哎呀，瞧！我长出了尾巴来！”
她旁边一个男孩哇哇叫：
“救命啊！我想我身上长出了毛！”
“我们像是怪物。”另一个叫了一句，
“我们的脸上长出了胡须！”
一个男孩长得特别高，
叫道：“出了什么事？我一点一点在变小！”
周围每一个小鬼，
手脚开始变成四条小小的腿。
一下子，两下子，
再也没有孩子，就只有耗子！
每个学校成了老鼠的天下，
它们在所有的教室里跑的跑，爬的爬！
所有发了疯的可怜教师大叫连声：
“哎呀，哪儿来的这么多小畜生？”
他们站到桌子上大喊：
“滚开，你们这些肮脏的老鼠！快滚蛋！
哪一位请快拿来老鼠夹好不好！
别忘了再拿来点干酪！”
现在老鼠夹纷纷拿到，
它们响个没完没了。
老鼠夹有厉害的弹簧，
弹起来乒乒乓乓！
这些声音实在动听，
我们女巫听着就像音乐之声！
到处堆起了死老鼠，
足有两英尺的高度，
教师东寻西找，
可是一个孩子也看不到！
教师们叫道：“到底出了什么事？
所有孩子都到了哪里？
现在已经九点半，上课铃早就已经敲，
他们上学可是从来不迟到！”
可怜的教师们不知怎么办才好。
有的坐着读书，只有几位由于无聊，
整天在扫死老鼠。
只有我们所有的女巫，
“万岁！万岁！”热烈欢呼！
点击
收听单词发音
收听单词发音 |
1
maker
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| n.制造者，制造商 | |
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2
foul
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| adj.污秽的；邪恶的；v.弄脏；妨害；犯规；n.犯规 | |
参考例句： |
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3
filthy
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| adj.卑劣的；恶劣的，肮脏的 | |
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4
screeched
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| v.发出尖叫声( screech的过去式和过去分词 )；发出粗而刺耳的声音；高叫 | |
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primroses
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| n.报春花( primrose的名词复数 )；淡黄色；追求享乐（招至恶果） | |
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spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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gasped
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| v.喘气( gasp的过去式和过去分词 )；喘息；倒抽气；很想要 | |
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gaped
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| v.目瞪口呆地凝视( gape的过去式和过去分词 )；张开，张大 | |
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wheeze
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| n.喘息声，气喘声；v.喘息着说 | |
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luscious
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| adj.美味的；芬芳的；肉感的，引与性欲的 | |
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stiffen
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| v.(使)硬，(使)变挺，(使)变僵硬 | |
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rigid
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| adj.严格的，死板的；刚硬的，僵硬的 | |
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shrieked
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| v.尖叫( shriek的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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cowered
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| v.畏缩，抖缩( cower的过去式 ) | |
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curiously
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| adv.有求知欲地；好问地；奇特地 | |
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brutes
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| 兽( brute的名词复数 )； 畜生； 残酷无情的人； 兽性 | |
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concocted
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| v.将（尤指通常不相配合的）成分混合成某物( concoct的过去式和过去分词 )；调制；编造；捏造 | |
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wondrous
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| adj.令人惊奇的，奇妙的；adv.惊人地；异乎寻常地；令人惊叹地 | |
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droplet
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| n.小滴，飞沫 | |
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triumphantly
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| ad.得意洋洋地；得胜地；成功地 | |
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chaos
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| n.混乱，无秩序 | |
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pandemonium
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| n.喧嚣，大混乱 | |
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hopping
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| n. 跳跃 动词hop的现在分词形式 | |
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standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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pointed
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| adj.尖的，直截了当的 | |
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nibbling
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| v.啃，一点一点地咬（吃）( nibble的现在分词 )；啃出（洞），一点一点咬出（洞）；慢慢减少；小口咬 | |
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mash
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| n.麦芽浆，糊状物，土豆泥；v.把…捣成糊状，挑逗，调情 | |
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slash
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| vi.大幅度削减；vt.猛砍，尖锐抨击，大幅减少；n.猛砍，斜线，长切口，衣衩 | |
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guzzling
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| v.狂吃暴饮，大吃大喝( guzzle的现在分词 ) | |
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