The thing that most interested Clyde at first was how, if at all, he was to keep the major portion of all this moneyhe was making for himself. For ever since he had been working and earning money, it had been assumed that hewould contribute a fair portion of all that he received--at least three-fourths of the smaller salaries he hadreceived up to this time--toward the upkeep of the home. But now, if he announced that he was receiving at leasttwenty-five dollars a week and more--and this entirely1 apart from the salary of fifteen a month and board--hisparents would assuredly expect him to pay ten or twelve.
But so long had he been haunted by the desire to make himself as attractive looking as any other well-dressedboy that, now that he had the opportunity, he could not resist the temptation to equip himself first and as speedilyas possible. Accordingly, he decided2 to say to his mother that all of the tips he received aggregated3 no more thana dollar a day. And, in order to give himself greater freedom of action in the matter of disposing of his sparetime, he announced that frequently, in addition to the long hours demanded of him every other day, he wasexpected to take the place of other boys who were sick or set to doing other things. And also, he explained thatthe management demanded of all boys that they look well outside as well as inside the hotel. He could not longbe seen coming to the hotel in the clothes that he now wore. Mr. Squires4, he said, had hinted as much. But, as ifto soften5 the blow, one of the boys at the hotel had told him of a place where he could procure6 quite all the thingsthat he needed on time.
And so unsophisticated was his mother in these matters that she believed him.
But that was not all. He was now daily in contact with a type of youth who, because of his larger experience withthe world and with the luxuries and vices8 of such a life as this, had already been inducted into certain forms oflibertinism and vice7 even which up to this time were entirely foreign to Clyde's knowledge and set him agapewith wonder and at first with even a timorous9 distaste. Thus, as Hegglund had pointed10 out, a certain percentageof this group, of which Clyde was now one, made common cause in connection with quite regular adventureswhich usually followed their monthly pay night. These adventures, according to their moods and their cash at thetime, led them usually either to one of two rather famous and not too respectable all-night restaurants. In groups,as he gathered by degrees from hearing them talk, they were pleased to indulge in occasional late showy supperswith drinks, after which they were wont11 to go to either some flashy dance hall of the downtown section to pickup12 a girl, or that failing as a source of group interest, to visit some notorious--or as they would have deemed itreputed--brothel, very frequently camouflaged13 as a boarding house, where for much less than the amount of cashin their possession they could, as they often boasted, "have any girl in the house." And here, of course, becauseof their known youth, ignorance, liberality, and uniform geniality15 and good looks, they were made much of, as arule, being made most welcome by the various madames and girls of these places who sought, for commercialreasons of course, to interest them to come again.
And so starved had been Clyde's life up to this time and so eager was he for almost any form of pleasure, thatfrom the first he listened with all too eager ears to any account of anything that spelled adventure or pleasure.
Not that he approved of these types of adventures. As a matter of fact at first it offended and depressed16 him,seeing as he did that it ran counter to all he had heard and been told to believe these many years. Nevertheless sosharp a change and relief from the dreary17 and repressed work in which he had been brought up was it, that hecould not help thinking of all this with an itch18 for the variety and color it seemed to suggest. He listenedsympathetically and eagerly, even while at times he was mentally disapproving19 of what he heard. And seeinghim so sympathetic and genial14, first one and then another of these youths made overtures20 to him to go here, thereor the other place--to a show, a restaurant, one of their homes, where a card game might be indulged in by two orthree of them, or even to one of the shameless houses, contact with which Clyde at first resolutely21 refused. Butby degrees, becoming familiar with Hegglund and Ratterer, both of whom he liked very much, and being invitedby them to a joy-night supper--a "blow-out" as they termed it, at Frissell's--he decided to go.
"There's going to be another one of our montly blow-outs to-morrow night, Clyde, around at Frissell's," Rattererhad said to him. "Don't you want to come along? You haven't been yet."By this time, Clyde, having acclimated22 himself to this caloric atmosphere, was by no means as dubious23 as he wasat first. For by now, in imitation of Doyle, whom he had studied most carefully and to great advantage, he hadoutfitted himself with a new brown suit, cap, overcoat, socks, stickpin24 and shoes as near like those of his mentoras possible. And the costume became him well--excellently well--so much so that he was far more attractive thanhe had ever been in his life, and now, not only his parents, but his younger brother and sister, were not a littleastonished and even amazed by the change.
How could Clyde have come by all this grandeur25 so speedily? How much could all this that he wore now havecost? Was he not hypothecating more of his future earnings26 for this temporary grandeur than was really wise? Hemight need it in the future. The other children needed things, too. And was the moral and spiritual atmosphere ofa place that made him work such long hours and kept him out so late every day, and for so little pay, just theplace to work?
To all of which, he had replied, rather artfully for him, that it was all for the best, he was not working too hard.
His clothes were not too fine, by any means--his mother should see some of the other boys. He was not spendingtoo much money. And, anyhow, he had a long while in which to pay for all he had bought.
But now, as to this supper. That was a different matter, even to him. How, he asked himself, in case the thinglasted until very late as was expected, could he explain to his mother and father his remaining out so very late.
Ratterer had said it might last until three or four, anyhow, although he might go, of course, any time, but howwould that look, deserting the crowd? And yet hang it all, most of them did not live at home as he did, or if theydid like Ratterer, they had parents who didn't mind what they did. Still, a late supper like that--was it wise? Allthese boys drank and thought nothing of it--Hegglund, Ratterer, Kinsella, Shiel. It must be silly for him to thinkthat there was so much danger in drinking a little, as they did on these occasions. On the other hand it was truethat he need not drink unless he wanted to. He could go, and if anything was said at home, he would say that hehad to work late. What difference did it make if he stayed out late once in a while? Wasn't he a man now? Wasn'the making more money than any one else in the family? And couldn't he begin to do as he pleased?
He began to sense the delight of personal freedom--to sniff27 the air of personal and delicious romance--and hewas not to be held back by any suggestion which his mother could now make.
如今克莱德最关心的是:
怎样把他挣来的钱大部分给自己积攒起来。因为从他一开始工作。挣钱起，家里就认为:
他会从他挣到的钱中拿出相当大的一部分……至少是过去他那份比较小的薪水的四分之三……来贴补家用。可是现在呢，他要是一说每星期至少可挣二十五块美元，甚至更多一些……而且每月薪水十五块美元和免费供膳还都不算在内……那末，他父母肯定指望他拿出十块或十二块美元来。
可是很久以来，他一直怀着一种愿望，想要把自己打扮得富有引诱力，就象任何一个衣冠楚楚的年轻人那样。如今他已有了这样的机会，他就经不住那种诱惑，首先要把自己打扮起来，而且还得越快越好。因此，他决定告知母亲，说他每日可得的小费，合起来才不过一块美元。为了个人得到更大自由。便于安排自己业余时间，他又说明，除了每隔一天要加一次班以外，经常还得给生病的或是另有任务的侍应生顶替上班。他还这样说，经理部要求所有侍应生即使在店外也要象在店里那样，穿戴得整整齐齐。他可不能老穿身上那套衣服去酒店上班。他说，这些事斯夸尔斯先生已向他暗示过了。不过，他又说，店里有一位侍应生，似乎要减轻他的压力，给他指点了一个地方，凡属他急需的一切东西，那儿通通都能马上买到。
他母亲对上面这类事简直一无所知，因此也就听信了他的话。
可问题还远不是这些呢。眼下他每天都要打交道的，就是这一类年轻人:
倘若同克莱德相比，他们由于阅世较深，与这种奢侈和邪恶的生活接触又多，早已沾染了某种淫荡。乃至于邪恶的习气，而克莱德对此至今还完全是门外汉，不由得为之目瞪口呆，开头甚至仍怀有羞怯的厌恶心理。比如，赫格伦就对他说过，这一拨人(如今克莱德也是其中一员了)里头，有相当一部分人，每月照例都要合伙纵酒狂欢一番，特别是在发月薪那天晚上。根据他们当时的兴致和手边有的现钱，通常他们总是在那两家相当有名气，可又不大高雅的通宵营业的酒家中任择其一。从他们的言谈中，克莱德逐渐获悉，他们喜欢结成一伙，常在深夜大吃大喝，然后照例到市中心那家不免有些俗丽的舞厅勾搭女人去。要是这一手勾不起大伙儿的兴致，他们干脆就奔那家名声颇臭……但他们却认为是遐迩驰名……的妓院(这种妓院往往都伪装成了寄宿舍)。正如他们常常吹嘘说，在那里，只要从他们手边的现钱中稍微拿出一些来，妓院里哪一个姑娘，都可以让你"随意挑选"。由于他们年轻无知，出手大方，而且个个长得相貌堂堂，和蔼可亲，照例备受欢迎。这些形形色色的妓院老板娘与女人，为了做生意起见，自然千方百计地吸引他们下次再度光临，所以也就特别殷勤周到招待他们。
截至目前为止，克莱德的生活一向枯燥乏味，同时，几乎对任何一种寻欢作乐的形式，他都跃跃欲试，因此，不拘是谁说起寻芳猎艳或则寻欢作乐的事，他一开头就侧耳细听，真是太过瘾了。这倒不是说他赞成这一类放浪形骸的行径。老实说，这种事一开头还让他感到恼火和苦闷，因为他认为那是跟他这么多年来所见所闻以及硬是要他接受的信仰大相径庭。然而，他自幼时起就在郁郁寡欢和备受压制的营生中长大的，现在这种变化和解脱与他的过去却形成了多么鲜明的对比!
这就使他在想到所有这一切的时候情不自禁地渴望着也能享受一下花式繁多和五光十色的生活乐趣。他对自己的听闻有时虽然心中颇不赞同，可是听的时候却露出热切和同情的神态。那些年轻人见他如此富于同情心。如此和蔼可亲，就争先恐后邀他到各处去玩……上剧院。去餐馆，或是到他们哪一位家里去，凑上两。三人打纸牌，甚至撺掇他到那些猥亵下流的场所去，开头克莱德是坚决不肯去那里的。不过，赫格伦和拉特勒这两个人，他是很喜欢的;后来他跟他们也都厮混熟了，因此，他们邀他到弗里塞尔酒家去吃"开心饭"……用他们的扯儿来说，就是大宴会……他就答应一准去。
"明儿晚上，我们上弗里塞尔吃每月一次的开心饭，克莱德，"拉特勒对他说。
"你也乐意去吗?
你一次还没去过呢?
"这时候，克莱德早已迎合店里这种热乎乎的气氛，就不象自己原先那样迟疑不定了。他竭力仿效多伊尔(对于此人，他已仔细研究过，并且收获甚大)给自己置了一整套崭新服装，包括棕色衣帽。大衣。短袜。别针和皮鞋，尽量打扮得象那些点拨他的师傅。而且这一套服装对他很合适……非常合适……简直是太合适了，他一辈子还没有象此刻那样富有吸引力，不仅是他的父母，就连他的弟妹也因这一变化而深为惊讶，乃至于目瞪口呆了。
克莱德怎么会一下子就这样阔气起来呢?
他现在穿的这一整套衣饰要花多少钱呢?
难道说他居然会糊涂到这样地步，为了一时摆阔气，背了债花钱，就把将来的收入作抵押吗?
将来也许他还得要花钱啊。别的孩子们也需要置东西啊。这家饭店叫他干活，时间那么长，每天都是深夜才回来，工钱却又那么少，再看看那里的风气，对他来说是不是合适的地方呢?
所有这些问题，他回答得都很巧妙，说一切都会好起来的，而他在那里的工作也不太吃力。他的衣服压根儿也不算太漂亮……他母亲不妨看看别的侍应生就得了。他花的钱也不算太多。他买这些东西反正都是分期付款，以后可以慢慢地拨还。
不过，这个晚宴，连他自己都认为完全是另一回事。他心里在想，估计晚宴时间一定拖得很晚，就会使他迟迟不归，那他又该怎样向父母解释呢?
拉特勒说过，反正差不多要到半夜三。四点才散，不过嘛，他当然可以随便什么时候先走的。那末，好意思把大伙儿扔下，自个先走吗?
可是，他妈的，他们十之八九都不象他那样住在家里，即使说象拉特勒那样的人虽也在家里住，可他们所作所为，做父母的一点儿都不过问。不过话又说回来，赴类似那样迟至深夜的宴会……到底是不是明智之举呢?
这些小伙子……赫格伦。拉特勒。金塞拉。希尔……个个都喝酒，压根儿不把它当一回事。在这样场合他们照例都喝酒，只有他一人认为即便稍微呷上一口就有很大危险性，他这种想法想必太傻了吧。
再说，他要是不想喝，自然也就用不着喝嘛。他先走好了，家里要是问他的话，就不妨推托说他的工作非得干到很晚不可。偶尔有一次回家晚些，这又算得上什么呢?
难道说现在他不是个成年人了吗?
难道说他挣的钱不是比家里随便哪一位还要多吗?
难道说自此以后他还不该爱怎么办就怎么办吗?
他开始体会到个人自由的快乐……亲自品尝品尝令人心醉神迷的浪漫史……如今母亲的任何警告，怎么也阻止不住他了。
收听单词发音 |
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entirely
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| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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decided
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| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
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aggregated
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| a.聚合的，合计的 | |
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squires
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| n.地主，乡绅( squire的名词复数 ) | |
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soften
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| v.(使)变柔软；(使)变柔和 | |
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procure
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| vt.获得，取得，促成；vi.拉皮条 | |
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vice
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| n.坏事；恶习；[pl.]台钳，老虎钳；adj.副的 | |
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vices
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| 缺陷( vice的名词复数 )； 恶习； 不道德行为； 台钳 | |
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timorous
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| adj.胆怯的，胆小的 | |
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pointed
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| adj.尖的，直截了当的 | |
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wont
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| adj.习惯于；v.习惯；n.习惯 | |
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pickup
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| n.拾起，获得 | |
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camouflaged
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| v.隐蔽( camouflage的过去式和过去分词 )；掩盖；伪装，掩饰 | |
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genial
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| adj.亲切的，和蔼的，愉快的，脾气好的 | |
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geniality
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| n.和蔼，诚恳；愉快 | |
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depressed
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| adj.沮丧的，抑郁的，不景气的，萧条的 | |
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dreary
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| adj.令人沮丧的，沉闷的，单调乏味的 | |
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itch
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| n.痒，渴望，疥癣；vi.发痒，渴望 | |
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disapproving
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| adj.不满的，反对的v.不赞成( disapprove的现在分词 ) | |
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overtures
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| n.主动的表示，提议；（向某人做出的）友好表示、姿态或提议( overture的名词复数 )；（歌剧、芭蕾舞、音乐剧等的）序曲，前奏曲 | |
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resolutely
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| adj.坚决地，果断地 | |
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acclimated
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| v.使适应新环境，使服水土服水土，适应( acclimate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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dubious
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| adj.怀疑的，无把握的；有问题的，靠不住的 | |
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stickpin
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grandeur
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| n.伟大，崇高，宏伟，庄严，豪华 | |
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earnings
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| n.工资收人；利润，利益，所得 | |
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sniff
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| vi.嗅…味道；抽鼻涕；对嗤之以鼻，蔑视 | |
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