IV
In the darkness Micky Argyle expelled his breath in a long hiss¹.
The war was over. They’d licked Hitler and Musso … Some of the chil-dren were going back. Soon, now … And then She had come back fromLondon and had said that he was going to stay at Sunny Point and be herown little boy….
He had said: “Where’s my Mom? Did a bomb get her?”
If she had been killed by a bomb—well, that would be not too bad. Ithappened to boys’ mothers.
But Mrs. Argyle said “No,” she hadn’t been killed. But she had somerather difficult work to do and couldn’t look after a child very well—thatsort of thing, anyway soft soap, meaning nothing … His Mom didn’t lovehim, didn’t want him back—he’d got to stay here, for ever….
He’d sneaked² round after that, trying to overhear conversations, and atlast he did hear something, just a fragment between Mrs. Argyle and herhusband. “Only too pleased to get rid of him—absolutely indifferent”—and something about a hundred pounds. So then he knew—his motherhad sold him for a hundred pounds….
The humiliation³ — the pain — he’d never got over it … And She hadbought him! He saw her, vaguely⁴, as embodied⁵ Power, someone againstwhom he, in his puny⁶ strength, was helpless. But he’d grow up, he’d bestrong one day, a man. And then he’d kill her….
He felt better once he’d made that resolution.
Later, when he went away to school, things were not so bad. But hehated the holidays—because of Her. Arranging everything, planning, giv-ing him all sorts of presents. Looking puzzled, because he was so unde-monstrative. He hated being kissed by her … And later still, he’d taken apleasure in thwarting⁷ her silly plans for him. Going into a bank! An oilcompany. Not he. He’d go and find work for himself.

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