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THE STORY ends there, so I close the notebook, remove my glasses and wipe my eyes. I look at her now that I have finished, but she does not look back. Instead she is staring out of the window at the courtyard, where friends and family meet.
I read to her this morning, as I do every morning, because it is something I must do. Not for duty—although I suppose a case could be made for this—but for another, more romantic reason. I wish I could explain it more fully1 right now, but it's still early, and talking about romance isn't really possible before lunch any more, at least not for me. Besides, I have no idea how it's going to turn out, and to be honest; I'd rather not get my hopes up.
We spend every day together now, but our nights are spent alone. The doctors tell me that I'm not allowed to see her after dark. I understand the reasons, and though I agree with them completely I sometimes break the rules. Late at night when my mood is right, I will sneak3 from my room and go to hers and watch her while she sleeps. Of this she knows nothing. I'll come in and see her breathe and know that, had it not been for her, I would never have married.
And when I look at her face, a face I know better than my own, I know that I have meant as much to her. And that means more to me than I could ever hope to explain.
Sometimes, when I am standing4 there, I think about how lucky I am to have been married to her for almost forty-nine years. Next month it will be that long. She heard me snore for the first forty-five, but since then we have slept in separate rooms. I do not sleep well without her. I toss and turn and yearn5 for her warmth and lie there most of the night, eyes open wide, watching the shadows dance across the ceilings like tumbleweeds rolling across the desert. I sleep two hours if I am lucky, and still I wake before dawn.
I shuffle6 towards her and sit in the chair beside her bed. My back aches when I sit. I must get a new cushion for this chair, I remind myself for the hundredth time. I reach for her hand and take it, bony and fragile. It feels nice. She responds with a twitch7, and gradually her thumb begins to rub my finger softly. I do not speak until she does; this I have learned. Most days I sit in silence until the sun goes down.
收听单词发音
1
fully
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| adv.完全地,全部地,彻底地;充分地 | |
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2
bout
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| n.侵袭,发作;一次(阵,回);拳击等比赛 | |
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3
sneak
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| vt.潜行(隐藏,填石缝);偷偷摸摸做;n.潜行;adj.暗中进行 | |
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4
standing
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| n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的 | |
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5
yearn
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| v.想念;怀念;渴望 | |
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6
shuffle
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| n.拖著脚走,洗纸牌;v.拖曳,慢吞吞地走 | |
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7
twitch
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| v.急拉,抽动,痉挛,抽搐;n.扯,阵痛,痉挛 | |
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8
sip
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| v.小口地喝,抿,呷;n.一小口的量 | |
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9
creek
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| n.小溪,小河,小湾 | |
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10
creeks
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| n.小湾( creek的名词复数 );小港;小河;小溪 | |
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11
throbbing
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| a. 跳动的,悸动的 | |
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12
throb
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| v.震颤,颤动;(急速强烈地)跳动,搏动 | |
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13
arthritis
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| n.关节炎 | |
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14
grotesque
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| adj.怪诞的,丑陋的;n.怪诞的图案,怪人(物) | |
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15
joints
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| 接头( joint的名词复数 ); 关节; 公共场所(尤指价格低廉的饮食和娱乐场所) (非正式); 一块烤肉 (英式英语) | |
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16
twilight
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| n.暮光,黄昏;暮年,晚期,衰落时期 | |
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17
deform
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| vt.损坏…的形状;使变形,使变丑;vi.变形 | |
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18
caresses
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| 爱抚,抚摸( caress的名词复数 ) | |
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19
uncommon
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| adj.罕见的,非凡的,不平常的 | |
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20
steering
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| n.操舵装置 | |
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21
spun
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| v.纺,杜撰,急转身 | |
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22
tighten
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| v.(使)变紧;(使)绷紧 | |
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23
sobbed
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| 哭泣,啜泣( sob的过去式和过去分词 ); 哭诉,呜咽地说 | |
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24
bosom
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| n.胸,胸部;胸怀;内心;adj.亲密的 | |
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25
forth
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| adv.向前;向外,往外 | |
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26
disorder
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| n.紊乱,混乱;骚动,骚乱;疾病,失调 | |
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27
disposition
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| n.性情,性格;意向,倾向;排列,部署 | |
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28
intrigue
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| vt.激起兴趣,迷住;vi.耍阴谋;n.阴谋,密谋 | |
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29
sift
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| v.筛撒,纷落,详察 | |
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30
untied
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| 松开,解开( untie的过去式和过去分词 ); 解除,使自由; 解决 | |
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31
professing
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| 声称( profess的现在分词 ); 宣称; 公开表明; 信奉 | |
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32
crab
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| n.螃蟹,偏航,脾气乖戾的人,酸苹果;vi.捕蟹,偏航,发牢骚;vt.使偏航,发脾气 | |
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33
marvelling
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| v.惊奇,对…感到惊奇( marvel的现在分词 ) | |
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34
flickering
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| adj.闪烁的,摇曳的,一闪一闪的 | |
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35
pinnacle
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| n.尖塔,尖顶,山峰;(喻)顶峰 | |
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wary
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| adj.谨慎的,机警的,小心的 | |
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37
swoop
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| n.俯冲,攫取;v.抓取,突然袭击 | |
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38
intrigued
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| adj.好奇的,被迷住了的v.搞阴谋诡计(intrigue的过去式);激起…的兴趣或好奇心;“intrigue”的过去式和过去分词 | |
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39
shrug
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| v.耸肩(表示怀疑、冷漠、不知等) | |
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40
paradox
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| n.似乎矛盾却正确的说法;自相矛盾的人(物) | |
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41
dozes
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| n.打盹儿,打瞌睡( doze的名词复数 )v.打盹儿,打瞌睡( doze的第三人称单数 ) | |
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42
glides
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| n.滑行( glide的名词复数 );滑音;音渡;过渡音v.滑动( glide的第三人称单数 );掠过;(鸟或飞机 ) 滑翔 | |
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43
determined
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| adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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44
jaw
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| n.颚,颌,说教,流言蜚语;v.喋喋不休,教训 | |
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45
odyssey
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| n.长途冒险旅行;一连串的冒险 | |
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46
encyclopedia
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| n.百科全书 | |
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47
refreshing
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| adj.使精神振作的,使人清爽的,使人喜欢的 | |
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48
shuffling
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| adj. 慢慢移动的, 滑移的 动词shuffle的现在分词形式 | |
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49
doorway
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| n.门口,(喻)入门;门路,途径 | |
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50
hunched
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| (常指因寒冷、生病或愁苦)耸肩弓身的,伏首前倾的 | |
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51
gnomes
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| n.矮子( gnome的名词复数 );侏儒;(尤指金融市场上搞投机的)银行家;守护神 | |
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52
fatten
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| v.使肥,变肥 | |
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53
chapel
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| n.小教堂,殡仪馆 | |
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54
amnesia
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| n.健忘症,健忘 | |
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55
carafe
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| n.玻璃水瓶 | |
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56
inhales
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| v.吸入( inhale的第三人称单数 ) | |
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57
miller
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| n.磨坊主 | |
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58
hazy
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| adj.有薄雾的,朦胧的;不肯定的,模糊的 | |
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59
muster
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| v.集合,收集,鼓起,激起;n.集合,检阅,集合人员,点名册 | |
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60
cataracts
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| n.大瀑布( cataract的名词复数 );白内障 | |
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61
murmurs
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| n.低沉、连续而不清的声音( murmur的名词复数 );低语声;怨言;嘀咕 | |
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62
pretence
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| n.假装,作假;借口,口实;虚伪;虚饰 | |
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63
inevitable
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| adj.不可避免的,必然发生的 | |
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64
tolled
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| 鸣钟(toll的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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65
fend
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| v.照料(自己),(自己)谋生,挡开,避开 | |
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66
flinches
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| v.(因危险和痛苦)退缩,畏惧( flinch的第三人称单数 ) | |
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67
defensive
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| adj.防御的;防卫的;防守的 | |
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68
oblivious
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| adj.易忘的,遗忘的,忘却的,健忘的 | |
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69
tingle
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| vi.感到刺痛,感到激动;n.刺痛,激动 | |
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70
tingling
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| v.有刺痛感( tingle的现在分词 ) | |
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71
numb
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| adj.麻木的,失去感觉的;v.使麻木 | |
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72
severed
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| v.切断,断绝( sever的过去式和过去分词 );断,裂 | |
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73
lulled
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| vt.使镇静,使安静(lull的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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74
prelude
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| n.序言,前兆,序曲 | |
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75
paralysis
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| n.麻痹(症);瘫痪(症) | |
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76
notation
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| n.记号法,表示法,注释;[计算机]记法 | |
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77
scent
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| n.气味,香味,香水,线索,嗅觉;v.嗅,发觉 | |
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78
buzzer
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| n.蜂鸣器;汽笛 | |
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79
optimists
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| n.乐观主义者( optimist的名词复数 ) | |
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80
cane
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| n.手杖,细长的茎,藤条;v.以杖击,以藤编制的 | |
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81
cadence
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| n.(说话声调的)抑扬顿挫 | |
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82
epic
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| n.史诗,叙事诗;adj.史诗般的,壮丽的 | |
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83
fragrances
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| n.芳香,香味( fragrance的名词复数 );香水 | |
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84
drawn
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| v.拖,拉,拔出;adj.憔悴的,紧张的 | |
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85
ivy
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| n.常青藤,常春藤 | |
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86
cypress
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| n.柏树 | |
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87
knuckles
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| n.(指人)指关节( knuckle的名词复数 );(指动物)膝关节,踝v.(指人)指关节( knuckle的第三人称单数 );(指动物)膝关节,踝 | |
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88
swollen
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| adj.肿大的,水涨的;v.使变大,肿胀 | |
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89
vows
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| 誓言( vow的名词复数 ); 郑重宣布,许愿 | |
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90
slippers
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| n. 拖鞋 | |
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91
sentimental
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| adj.多愁善感的,感伤的 | |
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92
trek
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| vi.作长途艰辛的旅行;n.长途艰苦的旅行 | |
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93
fluorescent
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| adj.荧光的,发出荧光的 | |
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94
squint
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| v. 使变斜视眼, 斜视, 眯眼看, 偏移, 窥视; n. 斜视, 斜孔小窗; adj. 斜视的, 斜的 | |
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95
banished
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| v.放逐,驱逐( banish的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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96
arteries
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| n.动脉( artery的名词复数 );干线,要道 | |
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97
blurred
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| v.(使)变模糊( blur的过去式和过去分词 );(使)难以区分;模模糊糊;迷离 | |
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98
illuminating
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| a.富于启发性的,有助阐明的 | |
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99
halfway
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| adj.中途的,不彻底的,部分的;adv.半路地,在中途,在半途 | |
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100
awaken
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| vi.醒,觉醒;vt.唤醒,使觉醒,唤起,激起 | |
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101
descends
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| v.下来( descend的第三人称单数 );下去;下降;下斜 | |
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102
guardian
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| n.监护人;守卫者,保护者 | |
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103
mighty
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| adj.强有力的;巨大的 | |
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104
undo
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| vt.解开,松开;取消,撤销 | |
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