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EACH TIME THAT I OPENED MY EYES TO THE MORNING light and realized I'd lived throughanother night was a surprise to me. After the surprise wore off, my heart would start to race and mypalms would sweat; I couldn't really breathe again until I'd gotten up and ascertained1 that Charlie hadsurvived as well.
I could tell he was worried—watching me jump at any loud sound, or my face suddenly go white for noreason that he could see. From the questions he asked now and then, he seemed to blame the change on Jacob's continued absence.
The terror that was always foremost in my thoughts usually distracted me from the fact that another weekhad passed, and Jacob still hadn't called me. But when I was able to concentrate on my normal life—ifmy life was really ever normal—this upset me.
I missed him horribly.
It had been bad enough to be alone before I was scared silly. Now, more than ever, I yearned2 for hiscarefree laugh and his infectious grin. I needed the safe sanity3 of his homemade garage and his warmhand around my cold fingers.
I'd half expected him to call on Monday. If there had been some progress with Embry, wouldn't he wantto report it? I wanted to believe that it was worry for his friend that was occupying all his time, not that hewas just giving up on me.
I called him Tuesday, but no one answered. Were the phone lines still having problems? Or had Billyinvested in caller I.D.?
On Wednesday I called every half hour until after eleven at night, desperate to hear the warmth ofJacob's voice.
Thursday I sat in my truck in front of my house—with the locks pushed down—keys in hand, for a solidhour. I was arguing with myself, trying to justify4 a quick trip to La Push, but I couldn't do it.
I knew that Laurent had gone back to Victoria by now. If I went to La Push, I took the chance of leadingone of them there. What if they caught up to me when Jake was nearby? As much as it hurt me, I knew itwas better for Jacob that he was avoiding me. Safer for him.
It was bad enough that I couldn't figure out a way to keep Charlie safe. Nighttime was the most likelytime that they would come looking ior me, and what could I say to get Charlie out of the house? If I toldhim the truth, he'd have me locked up in a rubber room somewhere. I would have enduredthat—welcomed it, even—if it could have kept him safe. But Victoria would still come to his house first,looking for me. Maybe, if she found me here, that would be enough for her. Maybe she would just leavewhen she was done with me.

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ascertained
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v.弄清,确定,查明( ascertain的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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yearned
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渴望,切盼,向往( yearn的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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sanity
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n.心智健全,神智正常,判断正确 | |
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justify
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vt.证明…正当(或有理),为…辩护 | |
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shuddered
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v.战栗( shudder的过去式和过去分词 );发抖;(机器、车辆等)突然震动;颤动 | |
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lethal
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adj.致死的;毁灭性的 | |
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punctures
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n.(尖物刺成的)小孔( puncture的名词复数 );(尤指)轮胎穿孔;(尤指皮肤上被刺破的)扎孔;刺伤v.在(某物)上穿孔( puncture的第三人称单数 );刺穿(某物);削弱(某人的傲气、信心等);泄某人的气 | |
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harry
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vt.掠夺,蹂躏,使苦恼 | |
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subconscious
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n./adj.潜意识(的),下意识(的) | |
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vampires
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n.吸血鬼( vampire的名词复数 );吸血蝠;高利贷者;(舞台上的)活板门 | |
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vampire
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n.吸血鬼 | |
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ragged
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adj.衣衫褴褛的,粗糙的,刺耳的 | |
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cult
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n.异教,邪教;时尚,狂热的崇拜 | |
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compulsory
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n.强制的,必修的;规定的,义务的 | |
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decided
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adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的 | |
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secluded
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adj.与世隔绝的;隐退的;偏僻的v.使隔开,使隐退( seclude的过去式和过去分词) | |
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weird
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adj.古怪的,离奇的;怪诞的,神秘而可怕的 | |
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acting
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n.演戏,行为,假装;adj.代理的,临时的,演出用的 | |
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soothe
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v.安慰;使平静;使减轻;缓和;奉承 | |
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confrontation
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n.对抗,对峙,冲突 | |
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curtly
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adv.简短地 | |
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frustrated
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adj.挫败的,失意的,泄气的v.使不成功( frustrate的过去式和过去分词 );挫败;使受挫折;令人沮丧 | |
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growled
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v.(动物)发狺狺声, (雷)作隆隆声( growl的过去式和过去分词 );低声咆哮着说 | |
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casually
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adv.漠不关心地,无动于衷地,不负责任地 | |
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determined
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adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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preoccupied
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adj.全神贯注的,入神的;被抢先占有的;心事重重的v.占据(某人)思想,使对…全神贯注,使专心于( preoccupy的过去式) | |
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hormones
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n. 荷尔蒙,激素 名词hormone的复数形式 | |
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bleak
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adj.(天气)阴冷的;凄凉的;暗淡的 | |
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morosely
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adv.愁眉苦脸地,忧郁地 | |
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mumble
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n./v.喃喃而语,咕哝 | |
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mumbled
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含糊地说某事,叽咕,咕哝( mumble的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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shuffled
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v.洗(纸牌)( shuffle的过去式和过去分词 );拖着脚步走;粗心地做;摆脱尘世的烦恼 | |
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spoke
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n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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gritted
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v.以沙砾覆盖(某物),撒沙砾于( grit的过去式和过去分词 );咬紧牙关 | |
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grimaced
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v.扮鬼相,做鬼脸( grimace的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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bent
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n.爱好,癖好;adj.弯的;决心的,一心的 | |
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slumped
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大幅度下降,暴跌( slump的过去式和过去分词 ); 沉重或突然地落下[倒下] | |
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killing
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n.巨额利润;突然赚大钱,发大财 | |
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stuffy
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adj.不透气的,闷热的 | |
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peripheral
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adj.周边的,外围的 | |
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spotted
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adj.有斑点的,斑纹的,弄污了的 | |
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scrap
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n.碎片;废料;v.废弃,报废 | |
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scrawl
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vt.潦草地书写;n.潦草的笔记,涂写 | |
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astonishment
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n.惊奇,惊异 | |
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radically
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ad.根本地,本质地 | |
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gloss
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n.光泽,光滑;虚饰;注释;vt.加光泽于;掩饰 | |
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tightened
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收紧( tighten的过去式和过去分词 ); (使)变紧; (使)绷紧; 加紧 | |
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aged
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adj.年老的,陈年的 | |
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veins
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n.纹理;矿脉( vein的名词复数 );静脉;叶脉;纹理 | |
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insignificant
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adj.无关紧要的,可忽略的,无意义的 | |
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resentment
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n.怨愤,忿恨 | |
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imploded
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v.(使)向心聚爆( implode的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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semblance
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n.外貌,外表 | |
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intensified
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v.(使)增强, (使)加剧( intensify的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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hostility
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n.敌对,敌意;抵制[pl.]交战,战争 | |
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serene
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adj. 安详的,宁静的,平静的 | |
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malicious
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adj.有恶意的,心怀恶意的 | |
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scrambled
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v.快速爬行( scramble的过去式和过去分词 );攀登;争夺;(军事飞机)紧急起飞 | |
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taboo
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n.禁忌,禁止接近,禁止使用;adj.禁忌的;v.禁忌,禁制,禁止 | |
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hissed
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发嘶嘶声( hiss的过去式和过去分词 ); 发嘘声表示反对 | |
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unfamiliar
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adj.陌生的,不熟悉的 | |
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permanently
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adv.永恒地,永久地,固定不变地 | |
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forth
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adv.向前;向外,往外 | |
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overt
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adj.公开的,明显的,公然的 | |
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spurt
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v.喷出;突然进发;突然兴隆 | |
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abruptly
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adv.突然地,出其不意地 | |
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jaw
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n.颚,颌,说教,流言蜚语;v.喋喋不休,教训 | |
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helping
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n.食物的一份&adj.帮助人的,辅助的 | |
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brittle
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adj.易碎的;脆弱的;冷淡的;(声音)尖利的 | |
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dubiously
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adv.可疑地,怀疑地 | |
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catching
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adj.易传染的,有魅力的,迷人的,接住 | |
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halfway
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adj.中途的,不彻底的,部分的;adv.半路地,在中途,在半途 | |
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filthy
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adj.卑劣的;恶劣的,肮脏的 | |
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reeking
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v.发出浓烈的臭气( reek的现在分词 );散发臭气;发出难闻的气味 (of sth);明显带有(令人不快或生疑的跡象) | |
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whooshing
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v.(使)飞快移动( whoosh的现在分词 ) | |
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chaos
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n.混乱,无秩序 | |
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eyebrow
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n.眉毛,眉 | |
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scrutinizing
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v.仔细检查,详审( scrutinize的现在分词 ) | |
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fuming
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愤怒( fume的现在分词 ); 大怒; 发怒; 冒烟 | |
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delusion
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n.谬见,欺骗,幻觉,迷惑 | |
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flinch
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v.畏缩,退缩 | |
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gaped
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v.目瞪口呆地凝视( gape的过去式和过去分词 );张开,张大 | |
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goaded
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v.刺激( goad的过去式和过去分词 );激励;(用尖棒)驱赶;驱使(或怂恿、刺激)某人 | |
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mumbling
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含糊地说某事,叽咕,咕哝( mumble的现在分词 ) | |
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spun
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v.纺,杜撰,急转身 | |
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potent
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adj.强有力的,有权势的;有效力的 | |
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appalled
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v.使惊骇,使充满恐惧( appall的过去式和过去分词)adj.惊骇的;丧胆的 | |
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drizzle
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v.下毛毛雨;n.毛毛雨,蒙蒙细雨 | |
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slanted
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有偏见的; 倾斜的 | |
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tangling
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(使)缠结, (使)乱作一团( tangle的现在分词 ) | |
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lashes
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n.鞭挞( lash的名词复数 );鞭子;突然猛烈的一击;急速挥动v.鞭打( lash的第三人称单数 );煽动;紧系;怒斥 | |
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carving
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n.雕刻品,雕花 | |
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riddled
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adj.布满的;充斥的;泛滥的v.解谜,出谜题(riddle的过去分词形式) | |
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crumble
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vi.碎裂,崩溃;vt.弄碎,摧毁 | |
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horrified
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a.(表现出)恐惧的 | |
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sodden
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adj.浑身湿透的;v.使浸透;使呆头呆脑 | |
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eyebrows
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眉毛( eyebrow的名词复数 ) | |
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linoleum
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n.油布,油毯 | |
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pajamas
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n.睡衣裤 | |
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crunched
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v.嘎吱嘎吱地咬嚼( crunch的过去式和过去分词 );嘎吱作响;(快速大量地)处理信息;数字捣弄 | |
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gravel
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n.砂跞;砂砾层;结石 | |
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suppleness
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柔软; 灵活; 易弯曲; 顺从 | |
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103
leached
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v.(将化学品、矿物质等)过滤( leach的过去式和过去分词 );(液体)过滤,滤去 | |
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crimson
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n./adj.深(绯)红色(的);vi.脸变绯红色 | |
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squeal
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v.发出长而尖的声音;n.长而尖的声音 | |
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