A SHORT time after the flight of the Emiral, a middle-class Jew called Pyrot, desirous of associating with the aristocracy and wishing to serve his country, entered the Penguin¹ army. The Minister of War, who at the time was Greatauk, Duke of Skull², could not endure him. He blamed him for his zeal³, his hooked nose, his vanity, his fondness for study, his thick lips, and his exemplary conduct. Every time the author of any misdeed was looked for, Greatauk used to say:

“It must be Pyrot!”

One morning General Panther, the Chief of the Staff, informed Greatauk of a serious matter. Eighty thousand trusses of hay intended for the cavalry⁴ had disappeared and not a trace of them was to be found.

Greatauk exclaimed at once:

“It must be Pyrot who has stolen them!”

He remained in thought for some time and said:

“The more I think of it the more I am convinced that Pyrot has stolen those eighty thousand trusses of hay. And I know it is by this: he stole them in order that he might sell them to our bitter enemies the Porpoises⁵. What an infamous⁶ piece of treachery!”

“There is no doubt about it,” answered Panther; “it only remains⁷ to prove it.”

The same day, as he passed by a cavalry barracks, Prince des Boscenos heard the troopers as they were sweeping⁸ out the yard, singing:

Boscenos est un gros cochon;

On en va faire des andouilles,

Des saucisses et du jambon

Pour le reveillon des pauv’ bougres.

It seemed to him contrary to all discipline that soldiers should sing this domestic and revolutionary refrain which on days of riot had been uttered by the lips of

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