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Chapter LX Roger Hamley’s Confession
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Roger had a great deal to think of as he turned away from looking after the carriage as long as it could be seen. The day before, he had believed that Molly had come to view all the symptoms of his growing love for her — symptoms which he thought had been so patent — as disgusting inconstancy to the inconstant Cynthia; that she had felt that an attachment1 which could be so soon transferred to another was not worth having; and that she had desired to mark all this by her changed treatment of him, and so to nip it in the bud. But this morning her old sweet, frank manner had returned — in their last interview, at any rate. He puzzled himself hard to find out what could have distressed2 her at breakfast-time. He even went so far as to ask Robinson whether Miss Gibson had received any letters that morning; and when he heard that she had had one, he tried to believe that the letter was in some way the cause of her sorrow. So far so good. They were friends again after their unspoken difference; but that was not enough for Roger. He felt every day more and more certain that she, and she alone, could make him happy. He had felt this, and had partly given up all hope, while his father had been urging upon him the very course he most desired to take. No need for ‘trying’ to love her, he said to himself — that was already done. And yet he was very jealous on her behalf. Was that love worthy4 of her which had once been given to Cynthia? Was not this affair too much a mocking mimicry5 of the last? Again just on the point of leaving England for a considerable time! If he followed her now to her own home — in the very drawing-room where he had once offered to Cynthia! And then by a strong resolve he determined6 on this course. They were friends now, and he kissed the rose that was her pledge of friendship. If he went to Africa, he ran some deadly chances; he knew better what they were now than he had done when he went before. Until his return he would not even attempt to win more of her love than he already had. But once safe home again, no weak fancies as to what might or might not be her answer should prevent his running all chances to gain the woman who was to him the one who excelled all. His was not the poor vanity that thinks more of the possible
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1
attachment
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n.附属物,附件;依恋;依附 | |
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distressed
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痛苦的 | |
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3
spoke
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n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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worthy
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adj.(of)值得的,配得上的;有价值的 | |
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mimicry
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n.(生物)拟态,模仿 | |
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determined
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adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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vent
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n.通风口,排放口;开衩;vt.表达,发泄 | |
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mortification
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n.耻辱,屈辱 | |
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coveted
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adj.令人垂涎的;垂涎的,梦寐以求的v.贪求,觊觎(covet的过去分词);垂涎;贪图 | |
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abiding
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adj.永久的,持久的,不变的 | |
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sate
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v.使充分满足 | |
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bonnet
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n.无边女帽;童帽 | |
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bonnets
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n.童帽( bonnet的名词复数 );(烟囱等的)覆盖物;(苏格兰男子的)无边呢帽;(女子戴的)任何一种帽子 | |
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confidential
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adj.秘(机)密的,表示信任的,担任机密工作的 | |
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yearning
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a.渴望的;向往的;怀念的 | |
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robust
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adj.强壮的,强健的,粗野的,需要体力的,浓的 | |
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grandee
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n.贵族;大公 | |
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stoutly
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adv.牢固地,粗壮的 | |
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judgment
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n.审判;判断力,识别力,看法,意见 | |
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affinities
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n.密切关系( affinity的名词复数 );亲近;(生性)喜爱;类同 | |
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boon
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n.恩赐,恩物,恩惠 | |
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squire
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n.护卫, 侍从, 乡绅 | |
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mortifying
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adj.抑制的,苦修的v.使受辱( mortify的现在分词 );伤害(人的感情);克制;抑制(肉体、情感等) | |
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refinement
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n.文雅;高尚;精美;精制;精炼 | |
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alluded
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提及,暗指( allude的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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fixed
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adj.固定的,不变的,准备好的;(计算机)固定的 | |
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complexion
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n.肤色;情况,局面;气质,性格 | |
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scarlet
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n.深红色,绯红色,红衣;adj.绯红色的 | |
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intercourse
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n.性交;交流,交往,交际 | |
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dread
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vt.担忧,忧虑;惧怕,不敢;n.担忧,畏惧 | |
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recur
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vi.复发,重现,再发生 | |
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imminent
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adj.即将发生的,临近的,逼近的 | |
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chronic
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adj.(疾病)长期未愈的,慢性的;极坏的 | |
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immediate
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adj.立即的;直接的,最接近的;紧靠的 | |
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converse
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vi.谈话,谈天,闲聊;adv.相反的,相反 | |
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perplexed
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adj.不知所措的 | |
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lodgings
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n. 出租的房舍, 寄宿舍 | |
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condoling
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v.表示同情,吊唁( condole的现在分词 ) | |
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backwards
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adv.往回地,向原处,倒,相反,前后倒置地 | |
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abruptly
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adv.突然地,出其不意地 | |
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penetrating
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adj.(声音)响亮的,尖锐的adj.(气味)刺激的adj.(思想)敏锐的,有洞察力的 | |
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disapprove
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v.不赞成,不同意,不批准 | |
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affected
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adj.不自然的,假装的 | |
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solitude
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n. 孤独; 独居,荒僻之地,幽静的地方 | |
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cape
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n.海角,岬;披肩,短披风 | |
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renewal
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adj.(契约)延期,续订,更新,复活,重来 | |
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tempted
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v.怂恿(某人)干不正当的事;冒…的险(tempt的过去分词) | |
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enquire
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v.打听,询问;调查,查问 | |
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prohibition
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n.禁止;禁令,禁律 | |
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folly
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n.愚笨,愚蠢,蠢事,蠢行,傻话 | |
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portentous
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adj.不祥的,可怕的,装腔作势的 | |
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concealed
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a.隐藏的,隐蔽的 | |
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versus
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prep.以…为对手,对;与…相比之下 | |
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attentive
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adj.注意的,专心的;关心(别人)的,殷勤的 | |
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forefinger
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n.食指 | |
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dodging
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n.避开,闪过,音调改变v.闪躲( dodge的现在分词 );回避 | |
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longing
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n.(for)渴望 | |
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lieutenant
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n.陆军中尉,海军上尉;代理官员,副职官员 | |
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devoted
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adj.忠诚的,忠实的,热心的,献身于...的 | |
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grievance
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n.怨愤,气恼,委屈 | |
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envious
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adj.嫉妒的,羡慕的 | |
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naively
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adv. 天真地 | |
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annoyances
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n.恼怒( annoyance的名词复数 );烦恼;打扰;使人烦恼的事 | |
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ascertained
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v.弄清,确定,查明( ascertain的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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facetious
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adj.轻浮的,好开玩笑的 | |
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snare
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n.陷阱,诱惑,圈套;(去除息肉或者肿瘤的)勒除器;响弦,小军鼓;vt.以陷阱捕获,诱惑 | |
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deities
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n.神,女神( deity的名词复数 );神祗;神灵;神明 | |
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obstinacy
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n.顽固;(病痛等)难治 | |
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