None but those who were most intimate with Alexey Alexandrovitch knew that, while on the surface the coldest and most reasonable of men, he had one weakness quite opposed to the general trend of his character. Alexey Alexandrovitch could not hear or see a child or woman crying without being moved. The sight of tears threw him into a state of nervous agitation1, and he utterly2 lost all power of reflection. The chief secretary of his department and his private secretary were aware of this, and used to warn women who came with petitions on no account to give way to tears, if they did not want to ruin their chances. "He will get angry, and will not listen to you," they used to say. And as a fact, in such cases the emotional disturbance3 set up in Alexey Alexandrovitch by the sight of tears found expression in hasty anger. "I can do nothing. Kindly4 leave the room!" he would commonly cry in such cases.
When returning from the races Anna had informed him of her relations with Vronsky, and immediately afterwards had burst into tears, hiding her face in her hands, Alexey Alexandrovitch, for all the fury aroused in him against her, was aware at the same time of a rush of that emotional disturbance always produced in him by tears. Conscious of it, and conscious that any expression of his feelings at that minute would be out of keeping with the position, he tried to suppress every manifestation5 of life in himself, and so neither stirred nor looked at her. This was what had caused that strange expression of deathlike rigidity6 in his face which had so impressed Anna.
When they reached the house he helped her to get out of the carriage, and making an effort to master himself, took leave of her with his usual urbanity, and uttered that phrase that bound him to nothing; he said that tomorrow he would let her know his decision.
His wife's words, confirming his worst suspicions, had sent a cruel pang7 to the heart of Alexey Alexandrovitch. That pang was intensified8 by the strange feeling of physical pity for her set up by her tears. But when he was all alone in the carriage Alexey Alexandrovitch, to his surprise and delight, felt complete relief both from this pity and from the doubts and agonies of jealousy9.
He experienced the sensations of a man who has had a tooth out after suffering long from toothache. After a fearful agony and a sense of something huge, bigger than the head itself, being torn out of his jaw10, the sufferer, hardly able to believe in his own good luck, feels all at once that what has so long poisoned his existence and enchained his attention, exists no longer, and that he can live and think again, and take interest in other things besides his tooth. This feeling Alexey Alexandrovitch was experiencing. The agony had been strange and terrible, but now it was over; he felt that he could live again and think of something other than his wife.
"No honor, no heart, no religion; a corrupt11 woman. I always knew it and always saw it, though I tried to deceive myself to spare her," he said to himself. And it actually seemed to him that he always had seen it: he recalled incidents of their past life, in which he had never seen anything wrong before--now these incidents proved clearly that she had always been a corrupt woman. "I made a mistake in linking my life to hers; but there was nothing wrong in my mistake, and so I cannot be unhappy. It's not I that am to blame," he told himself, "but she. But I have nothing to do with her. She does not exist for me..."
Everything relating to her and her son, towards whom his sentiments were as much changed as towards her, ceased to interest him. The only thing that interested him now was the question of in what way he could best, with most propriety12 and comfort for himself, and thus with most justice, extricate13 himself from the mud with which she had spattered him in her fall, and then proceed along his path of active, honorable, and useful existence.
"I cannot be made unhappy by the fact that a contemptible14 woman has committed a crime. I have only to find the best way out of the difficult position in which she has placed me. And I shall find it," he said to himself, frowning more and more. "I'm not the first nor the last." And to say nothing of historical instances dating from the "Fair Helen" of Menelaus, recently revived in the memory of all, a whole list of contemporary examples of husbands with unfaithful wives in the highest society rose before Alexey Alexandrovitch's imagination. "Daryalov, Poltavsky, Prince Karibanov, Count Paskudin, Dram.... Yes, even Dram, such an honest, capable fellow...Semyonov, Tchagin, Sigonin," Alexey Alexandrovitch remembered. "Admitting that a certain quite irrational15 ridicule16 falls to the lot of these men, yet I never saw anything but a misfortune in it, and always felt sympathy for it," Alexey Alexandrovitch said to himself, though indeed this was not the fact, and he had never felt sympathy for misfortunes of that kind, but the more frequently he had heard of instances of unfaithful wives betraying their husbands, the more highly he had thought of himself. "It is a misfortune which may befall anyone. And this misfortune has befallen me. The only thing to be done is to make the best of the position."
And he began passing in review the methods of proceeding17 of men who had been in the same position that he was in.
"Daryalov fought a duel18...."
The duel had particularly fascinated the thoughts of Alexey Alexandrovitch in his youth, just because he was physically19 a coward, and was himself well aware of the fact. Alexey Alexandrovitch could not without horror contemplate20 the idea of a pistol aimed at himself, and never made use of any weapon in his life. This horror had in his youth set him pondering on dueling21, and picturing himself in a position in which he would have to expose his life to danger. Having attained22 success and an established position in the world, he had long ago forgotten this feeling; but the habitual23 bent24 of feeling reasserted itself, and dread25 of his own cowardice26 proved even now so strong that Alexey Alexandrovitch spent a long while thinking over the question of dueling in all its aspects, and hugging the idea of a duel, though he was fully27 aware beforehand that he would never under any circumstances fight one.
"There's no doubt our society is still so barbarous (it's not the same in England) that very many"--and among these were those whose opinion Alexey Alexandrovitch particularly valued--"look favorably on the duel; but what result is attained by it? Suppose I call him out," Alexey Alexandrovitch went on to himself, and vividly28 picturing the night he would spend after the challenge, and the pistol aimed at him, he shuddered29, and knew that he never would do it--"suppose I call him out. Suppose I am taught," he went on musing30, "to shoot; I press the trigger," he said to himself, closing his eyes, "and it turns out I have killed him," Alexey Alexandrovitch said to himself, and he shook his head as though to dispel31 such silly ideas. "What sense is there in murdering a man in order to define one's relation to a guilty wife and son? I should still just as much have to decide what I ought to do with her. But what is more probable and what would doubtless occur--I should be killed or wounded. I, the innocent person, should be the victim--killed or wounded. It's even more senseless. But apart from that, a challenge to fight would be an act hardly honest on my side. Don't I know perfectly33 well that my friends would never allow me to fight a duel--would never allow the life of a statesman, needed by Russia, to be exposed to danger? Knowing perfectly well beforehand that the matter would never come to real danger, it would amount to my simply trying to gain a certain sham34 reputation by such a challenge. That would be dishonest, that would be false, that would be deceiving myself and others. A duel is quite irrational, and no one expects it of me. My aim is simply to safeguard my reputation, which is essential for the uninterrupted pursuit of my public duties." Official duties, which had always been of great consequence in Alexey Alexandrovitch's eyes, seemed of special importance to his mind at this moment. Considering and rejecting the duel, Alexey Alexandrovitch turned to divorce--another solution selected by several of the husbands he remembered. Passing in mental review all the instances he knew of divorces (there were plenty of them in the very highest society with which he was very familiar), Alexey Alexandrovitch could not find a single example in which the object of divorce was that which he had in view. In all these instances the husband had practically ceded35 or sold his unfaithful wife, and the very party which, being in fault, had not the right to contract a fresh marriage, had formed counterfeit36, pseudo-matrimonial ties with a self-styled husband. In his own case, Alexey Alexandrovitch saw that a legal divorce, that is to say, one in which only the guilty wife would be repudiated37, was impossible of attainment38. He saw that the complex conditions of the life they led made the coarse proofs of his wife's guilt32, required by the law, out of the question; he saw that a certain refinement39 in that life would not admit of such proofs being brought forward, even if he had them, and that to bring forward such proofs would damage him in the public estimation more than it would her.
An attempt at divorce could lead to nothing but a public scandal, which would be a perfect godsend to his enemies for calumny40 and attacks on his high position in society. His chief object, to define the position with the least amount of disturbance possible, would not be attained by divorce either. Moreover, in the event of divorce, or even of an attempt to obtain a divorce, it was obvious that the wife broke off all relations with the husband and threw in her lot with the lover. And in spite of the complete, as he supposed, contempt and indifference41 he now felt for his wife, at the bottom of his heart, Alexey Alexandrovitch still had one feeling left in regard to her--a disinclination to see her free to throw in her lot with Vronsky, so that her crime would be to her advantage. The mere42 notion of this so exasperated43 Alexey Alexandrovitch, that directly it rose to his mind he groaned44 with inward agony, and got up and changed his place in the carriage, and for a long while after, he sat with scowling45 brows, wrapping his numbed46 and bony legs in the fleecy rug.
"Apart from formal divorce, One might still do like Karibanov, Paskudin, and that good fellow Dram--that is, separate from one's wife," he went on thinking, when he had regained48 his composure. But this step too presented the same drawback of public scandal as a divorce, and what was more, a separation, quite as much as a regular divorce, flung his wife into the arms of Vronsky. "No, it's out of the question, out of the question!" he said again, twisting his rug about him again. "I cannot be unhappy, but neither she nor he ought to be happy."
The feeling of jealousy, which had tortured him during the period of uncertainty49, had passed away at the instant when the tooth had been with agony extracted by his wife's words. But that feeling had been replaced by another, the desire, not merely that she should not be triumphant50, but that she should get due punishment for her crime. He did not acknowledge this feeling, but at the bottom of his heart he longed for her to suffer for having destroyed his peace of mind--his honor. And going once again over the conditions inseparable from a duel, a divorce, a separation, and once again rejecting them, Alexey Alexandrovitch felt convinced that there was only one solution,--to keep her with him, concealing51 what had happened from the world, and using every measure in his power to break off the intrigue52, and still more--though this he did not admit to himself--to punish her. "I must inform her of my conclusion, that thinking over the terrible position in which she has placed her family, all other solutions will be worse for both sides than an external status quo, and that such I agree to retain, on the strict condition of obedience53 on her part to my wishes, that is to say, cessation of all intercourse54 with her lover." When this decision had been finally adopted, another weighty consideration occurred to Alexey
Alexandrovitch in support of it. "By such a course only shall I be acting55 in accordance with the dictates56 of religion," he told himself. "In adopting this course, I am not casting off a guilty wife, but giving her a chance of amendment57; and, indeed, difficult as the task will be to me, I shall devote part of my energies to her reformation and salvation58."
Though Alexey Alexandrovitch was perfectly aware that he could not exert any moral influence over his wife, that such an attempt at reformation could lead to nothing but falsity; though in passing through these difficult moments he had not once thought of seeking guidance in religion, yet now, when his conclusion corresponded, as it seemed to him, with the requirements of religion, this religious sanction to his decision gave him complete satisfaction, and to some extent restored his peace of mind. He was pleased to think that, even in such an important crisis in life, no one would be able to say that he had not acted in accordance with the principles of that religion whose banner he had always held aloft amid the general coolness and indifference. As he pondered over subsequent developments, Alexey Alexandrovitch did not see, indeed, why his relations with his wife should not remain practically the same as before. No doubt, she could never regain47 his esteem59, but there was not, and there could not be, any sort of reason that his existence should be troubled, and that he should suffer because she was a bad and faithless wife. "Yes, time will pass; time, which arranges all things, and the old relations will be reestablished," Alexey Alexandrovitch told himself; "so far reestablished, that is, that I shall not be sensible of a break in the continuity of my life. She is bound to be unhappy, but I am not to blame, and so I cannot be unhappy."
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agitation
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| n.搅动；搅拌；鼓动，煽动 | |
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utterly
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| adv.完全地，绝对地 | |
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disturbance
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| n.动乱，骚动；打扰，干扰；(身心)失调 | |
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kindly
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| adj.和蔼的，温和的，爽快的；adv.温和地，亲切地 | |
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manifestation
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| n.表现形式；表明；现象 | |
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rigidity
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| adj.钢性，坚硬 | |
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pang
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| n.剧痛，悲痛，苦闷 | |
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intensified
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| v.（使）增强， （使）加剧( intensify的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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jealousy
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| n.妒忌，嫉妒，猜忌 | |
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jaw
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| n.颚，颌，说教，流言蜚语；v.喋喋不休，教训 | |
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corrupt
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| v.贿赂，收买；adj.腐败的，贪污的 | |
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propriety
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| n.正当行为；正当；适当 | |
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extricate
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| v.拯救，救出；解脱 | |
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contemptible
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| adj.可鄙的，可轻视的，卑劣的 | |
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irrational
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| adj.无理性的，失去理性的 | |
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ridicule
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| v.讥讽，挖苦；n.嘲弄 | |
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proceeding
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| n.行动，进行，(pl.)会议录，学报 | |
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duel
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| n./v.决斗；(双方的)斗争 | |
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physically
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| adj.物质上，体格上，身体上，按自然规律 | |
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contemplate
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| vt.盘算，计议；周密考虑；注视，凝视 | |
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dueling
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| n. 决斗, 抗争(=duelling) 动词duel的现在分词形式 | |
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attained
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| （通常经过努力）实现( attain的过去式和过去分词 )； 达到； 获得； 达到（某年龄、水平、状况） | |
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habitual
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| adj.习惯性的；通常的，惯常的 | |
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bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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dread
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| vt.担忧，忧虑；惧怕，不敢；n.担忧，畏惧 | |
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cowardice
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| n.胆小，怯懦 | |
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fully
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| adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地 | |
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vividly
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| adv.清楚地，鲜明地，生动地 | |
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shuddered
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| v.战栗( shudder的过去式和过去分词 )；发抖；（机器、车辆等）突然震动；颤动 | |
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musing
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| n. 沉思，冥想 adj. 沉思的, 冥想的 动词muse的现在分词形式 | |
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dispel
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| vt.驱走，驱散，消除 | |
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guilt
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| n.犯罪；内疚；过失，罪责 | |
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perfectly
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| adv.完美地，无可非议地，彻底地 | |
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sham
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| n./adj.假冒(的)，虚伪(的) | |
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ceded
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| v.让给，割让，放弃( cede的过去式 ) | |
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counterfeit
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| vt.伪造，仿造；adj.伪造的，假冒的 | |
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repudiated
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| v.（正式地）否认( repudiate的过去式和过去分词 )；拒绝接受；拒绝与…往来；拒不履行（法律义务） | |
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attainment
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| n.达到，到达；［常pl.］成就，造诣 | |
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refinement
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| n.文雅；高尚；精美；精制；精炼 | |
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calumny
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| n.诽谤，污蔑，中伤 | |
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indifference
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| n.不感兴趣，不关心，冷淡，不在乎 | |
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mere
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| adj.纯粹的；仅仅，只不过 | |
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exasperated
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| adj.恼怒的 | |
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groaned
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| v.呻吟( groan的过去式和过去分词 )；发牢骚；抱怨；受苦 | |
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scowling
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| 怒视，生气地皱眉( scowl的现在分词 ) | |
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numbed
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| v.使麻木，使麻痹( numb的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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regain
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| vt.重新获得，收复，恢复 | |
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regained
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| 复得( regain的过去式和过去分词 )； 赢回； 重回； 复至某地 | |
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uncertainty
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| n.易变，靠不住，不确知，不确定的事物 | |
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triumphant
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| adj.胜利的，成功的；狂欢的，喜悦的 | |
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51
concealing
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| v.隐藏，隐瞒，遮住( conceal的现在分词 ) | |
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52
intrigue
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| vt.激起兴趣，迷住；vi.耍阴谋；n.阴谋，密谋 | |
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obedience
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| n.服从，顺从 | |
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intercourse
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| n.性交；交流，交往，交际 | |
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acting
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| n.演戏，行为，假装；adj.代理的，临时的，演出用的 | |
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dictates
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| n.命令，规定，要求( dictate的名词复数 )v.大声讲或读( dictate的第三人称单数 )；口授；支配；摆布 | |
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57
amendment
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| n.改正，修正，改善，修正案 | |
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58
salvation
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| n.（尤指基督）救世，超度，拯救，解困 | |
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esteem
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| n.尊敬，尊重；vt.尊重，敬重；把…看作 | |
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