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CHAPTER XX
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Fru Adelheid sat, book in hand, without reading.
It was late. Finn had been with her and had said good-night and Cordt was not at home. It was silent in the house and silent outside.
She had a feeling as though she were alone in the world.
Fru Adelheid was not happy.
The peace which the good grey years had brought had departed from the house. She could not see her way anywhere: not with Finn, not when she was alone, least of all when Cordt was in the room.
She did not feel safe even at church. It would happen to her that she left[242] church heavier in mind than when she entered. It also happened that she simply dared not go in, but turned back, when the organ pealed1 to her in the porch.
She sat and stared, with her white hands folded in her lap. She wanted to try if she could think the thing out to the end. But she had tried before, with ever-decreasing success.
First, there was the going back to the old room.
This was the beginning and she could not but think that it was the whole matter, for, in truth, she had never got over it. She could not defend herself against the memories that came crowding one upon the other. Her blood grew hot, her eyes moist, without her knowing why.
She suffered from a constant terror which she could neither explain nor shake off. Now it was Finn, whose pale[243] face frightened her. Now it was Cordt, who was silent and ever more silent and brooded over his thoughts.
Then she was overcome as by a despairing remorse2 and she could not see how she had offended. Then she went in a secret dread3 of revenge and she knew of no one who meant her any harm.
There were days on which every step she took gave a dull and threatening echo of the old days. She felt as though she were living in a house whose walls were full of secret recesses4 with old documents which would upset everything that existed, if they came to light ... she felt as though she were walking over mysterious vaults6 that
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1
pealed
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| v.(使)(钟等)鸣响,(雷等)发出隆隆声( peal的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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2
remorse
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| n.痛恨,悔恨,自责 | |
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3
dread
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| vt.担忧,忧虑;惧怕,不敢;n.担忧,畏惧 | |
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4
recesses
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| n.壁凹( recess的名词复数 );(工作或业务活动的)中止或暂停期间;学校的课间休息;某物内部的凹形空间v.把某物放在墙壁的凹处( recess的第三人称单数 );将(墙)做成凹形,在(墙)上做壁龛;休息,休会,休庭 | |
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recess
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| n.短期休息,壁凹(墙上装架子,柜子等凹处) | |
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6
vaults
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| n.拱顶( vault的名词复数 );地下室;撑物跳高;墓穴 | |
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7
concealed
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| a.隐藏的,隐蔽的 | |
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8
hesitation
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| n.犹豫,踌躇 | |
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drawn
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| v.拖,拉,拔出;adj.憔悴的,紧张的 | |
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bent
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| n.爱好,癖好;adj.弯的;决心的,一心的 | |
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kindles
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| (使某物)燃烧,着火( kindle的第三人称单数 ); 激起(感情等); 发亮,放光 | |
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12
fixed
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| adj.固定的,不变的,准备好的;(计算机)固定的 | |
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13
knuckles
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| n.(指人)指关节( knuckle的名词复数 );(指动物)膝关节,踝v.(指人)指关节( knuckle的第三人称单数 );(指动物)膝关节,踝 | |
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14
rusty
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| adj.生锈的;锈色的;荒废了的 | |
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exultant
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| adj.欢腾的,狂欢的,大喜的 | |
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16
hymns
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| n.赞美诗,圣歌,颂歌( hymn的名词复数 ) | |
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psalms
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| n.赞美诗( psalm的名词复数 );圣诗;圣歌;(中的) | |
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18
merged
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| (使)混合( merge的过去式和过去分词 ); 相融; 融入; 渐渐消失在某物中 | |
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19
quenched
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| 解(渴)( quench的过去式和过去分词 ); 终止(某事物); (用水)扑灭(火焰等); 将(热物体)放入水中急速冷却 | |
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20
hearth
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| n.壁炉炉床,壁炉地面 | |
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21
spoke
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| n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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22
importune
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| v.强求;不断请求 | |
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folly
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| n.愚笨,愚蠢,蠢事,蠢行,傻话 | |
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CHAPTER XIX
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CHAPTER XXI
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