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CHAPTER XXXII WORD FROM JEM
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4th August 1918
"It is four years tonight since the dance at the lighthouse—four years of war. It seems like three times four. I was fifteen then. I am nineteen now. I expected that these past four years would be the most delightful1 years of my life and they have been years of war—years of fear and grief and worry—but I humbly2 hope, of a little growth in strength and character as well.
"Today I was going through the hall and I heard mother saying something to father about me. I didn't mean to listen—I couldn't help hearing her as I went along the hall and upstairs—so perhaps that is why I heard what listeners are said never to hear—something good of myself. And because it was mother who said it I'm going to write it here in my journal, for my comforting when days of discouragement come upon me, in which I feel that I am vain and selfish and weak and that there is no good thing in me.
"'Rilla has developed in a wonderful fashion these past four years. She used to be such an irresponsible young creature. She has changed into a capable, womanly girl and she is such a comfort to me. Nan and Di have grown a little away from me—they have been so little at home—but Rilla has grown closer and closer to me. We are chums. I don't see how I could have got through these terrible years without her, Gilbert.'
"There, that is just what mother said—and I feel glad—and sorry—and proud—and humble3! It's beautiful to have my mother think that about me—but I don't deserve it quite. I'm not as good and strong as all that. There are heaps of times when I have felt cross and impatient and woeful and despairing. It is mother and Susan who have been this family's backbone4. But I have helped a little, I believe, and I am so glad and thankful.
"The war news has been good right along. The French and Americans are pushing the Germans back and back and back. Sometimes I am afraid it is too good to last—after nearly four years of disasters one has a feeling that this constant success is unbelievable. We don't rejoice noisily over it. Susan keeps the flag up but we go softly. The price paid has been too high for
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1
delightful
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adj.令人高兴的,使人快乐的 | |
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2
humbly
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adv. 恭顺地,谦卑地 | |
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3
humble
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adj.谦卑的,恭顺的;地位低下的;v.降低,贬低 | |
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4
backbone
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n.脊骨,脊柱,骨干;刚毅,骨气 | |
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5
jubilation
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n.欢庆,喜悦 | |
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6
bugs
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adj.疯狂的,发疯的n.窃听器( bug的名词复数 );病菌;虫子;[计算机](制作软件程序所产生的意料不到的)错误 | |
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7
enacted
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制定(法律),通过(法案)( enact的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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8
brute
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n.野兽,兽性 | |
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9
shrieked
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v.尖叫( shriek的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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10
mortification
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n.耻辱,屈辱 | |
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11
attain
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vt.达到,获得,完成 | |
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12
devoutly
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adv.虔诚地,虔敬地,衷心地 | |
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13
clattered
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发出咔哒声(clatter的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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14
devotedly
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专心地; 恩爱地; 忠实地; 一心一意地 | |
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15
devoted
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adj.忠诚的,忠实的,热心的,献身于...的 | |
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16
determined
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adj.坚定的;有决心的 | |
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17
tragic
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adj.悲剧的,悲剧性的,悲惨的 | |
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18
sobs
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啜泣(声),呜咽(声)( sob的名词复数 ) | |
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19
sobbed
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哭泣,啜泣( sob的过去式和过去分词 ); 哭诉,呜咽地说 | |
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20
numb
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adj.麻木的,失去感觉的;v.使麻木 | |
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21
enlisted
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adj.应募入伍的v.(使)入伍, (使)参军( enlist的过去式和过去分词 );获得(帮助或支持) | |
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22
standing
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n.持续,地位;adj.永久的,不动的,直立的,不流动的 | |
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23
doorway
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n.门口,(喻)入门;门路,途径 | |
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24
secondly
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adv.第二,其次 | |
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delirious
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adj.不省人事的,神智昏迷的 | |
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turnips
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芜青( turnip的名词复数 ); 芜菁块根; 芜菁甘蓝块根; 怀表 | |
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27
luxurious
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adj.精美而昂贵的;豪华的 | |
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tenor
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n.男高音(歌手),次中音(乐器),要旨,大意 | |
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wispy
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adj.模糊的;纤细的 | |
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30
spoke
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n.(车轮的)辐条;轮辐;破坏某人的计划;阻挠某人的行动 v.讲,谈(speak的过去式);说;演说;从某种观点来说 | |
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31
extinction
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n.熄灭,消亡,消灭,灭绝,绝种 | |
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32
clump
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n.树丛,草丛;vi.用沉重的脚步行走 | |
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33
legacy
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n.遗产,遗赠;先人(或过去)留下的东西 | |
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34
squander
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v.浪费,挥霍 | |
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