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CHAPTER V
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The nature of the curious influence that Doctor Moon exerted upon her, Luella could not guess. But as the days passed, she found herself doing many things that had been repugnant to her before. She stayed at home with Charles; and when he grew better, she went out with him sometimes to dinner, or the theatre, but only when he expressed a wish. She visited the kitchen every day, and kept an unwilling1 eye on the house, at first with a horror that it would go wrong again, then from habit. And she felt that it was all somehow mixed up with Doctor Moon—it was something he kept telling her about life, or almost telling her, and yet concealing2 from her, as though he were afraid to have her know.
With the resumption of their normal life, she found that Charles was less nervous. His habit of rubbing his face had left him, and if the world seemed less gay and happy to her than it had before, she experienced a certain peace, sometimes, that she had never known.
Then, one afternoon, Doctor Moon told her suddenly that he was going away.
"Do you mean for good?" she demanded with a touch of panic.
"For good."
For a strange moment she wasn't sure whether she was glad or sorry.
"You don't need me any more," he said quietly. "You don't realize it, but you've grown up."
He came over and, sitting on the couch beside her, took her hand.
Luella sat silent and tense—listening.
"We make an agreement with children that they can sit in the audience without helping3 to make the play," he said, "but if they still sit in the audience after they're grown, somebody's got to work double time for them, so that they can enjoy the light and glitter of the world."
"But I want the light and glitter," she protested. "That's all there is in life. There can't be anything wrong in wanting to have things warm."
"Things will still be warm."
"How?"
"Things will warm themselves from you."
Luella looked at him, startled.
"It's your turn to be the centre, to give others what was given to you for so long. You've got to give security to young people and peace to your husband, and a sort of charity to the old. You've got to let the people who work for you depend on you. You've got to cover up a few more troubles than you show, and be a little more patient than the average person, and do a little more instead of a little less than your share. The light and glitter of the world is in your hands."
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1
unwilling
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adj.不情愿的 | |
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2
concealing
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v.隐藏,隐瞒,遮住( conceal的现在分词 ) | |
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3
helping
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n.食物的一份&adj.帮助人的,辅助的 | |
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4
honeymoon
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n.蜜月(假期);vi.度蜜月 | |
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5
frankly
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adv.坦白地,直率地;坦率地说 | |
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6
doorway
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n.门口,(喻)入门;门路,途径 | |
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7
tragic
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adj.悲剧的,悲剧性的,悲惨的 | |
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8
vista
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n.远景,深景,展望,回想 | |
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9
stouter
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粗壮的( stout的比较级 ); 结实的; 坚固的; 坚定的 | |
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CHAPTER IV
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HOT AND COLD BLOOD I
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