7
THE IRON SOCIETY soldiers freed up one of their mounts so Granddad and Father could ride.
Whipping his horse, Black Eye took the lead, while the glib¹ Five Troubles, who hated theCommunists and the Nationalists, trotted² alongside Granddad. His dappled colt was very youngand eager to catch up to the others, but Five Troubles kept a tight rein⁴. Never a man to mincewords, he looked back and said, ‘Commander Yu, I’ve been doing all the talking. You haven’tsaid anything.’
Granddad smiled wryly⁵. ‘I can barely read two hundred words. I’m an expert in murder andarson, but you might as well take me to the slaughterhouse if you want me to talk about nationalaffairs!’
‘Then who do you think we ought to turn the country over to after we drive out the Japanese?’
‘That has nothing to do with me. All I know is that no one would dare take a bite out of mydick.’
‘What would you say if the Communists were in charge?’
Granddad snorted contemptuously out of one nostril⁶.
‘How about the Nationalists?’
He snorted out of the other nostril.
‘That’s what I say. What China needs is an emperor! I’ve got it all figured out: struggles comeand go, long periods of division precede unity⁷ and long periods of unity precede division, but thenation aways falls into the hands of an emperor. The nation is the emperor’s family, the family isthe emperor’s nation. That’s why he governs so benevolently⁸. But if a political party is in charge,everybody’s got his own idea, with Grandpa saying it’s too cold and Grandma complaining aboutthe heat, and everything’s all fucked up.’
He reined⁹ in his dappled colt and waited for Granddad to catch up. Then, leaning oversecretively, he said, ‘Commander Yu, I’ve been reading Romance of the Three Kingdoms andOutlaws of the

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