Reviewing the matter later, I could see that I made one or twoblunders in my conduct of the campaign to win over Professor Derrick.

　　In the first place, I made a bad choice of time and place. At themoment this did not strike me. It is a simple matter, I reflected, fora man to pass another by haughtily and without recognition, when theymeet on dry land; but, when the said man, being it should beremembered, an indifferent swimmer, is accosted in the water and outof his depth, the feat becomes a hard one. It seemed to me that Ishould have a better chance with the professor in the water than outof it.

　　My second mistake--and this was brought home to me almost immediately--was in bringing Ukridge along. Not that I really brought him along;it was rather a case of being unable to shake him off. When he met meon the gravel outside the house at a quarter to eight on the followingmorning, clad in a dingy mackintosh which, swinging open, revealed apurple bathing-suit, I confess that my heart sank. Unfortunately, allmy efforts to dissuade him from accompanying me were attributed by himto a pardonable nervousness--or, as he put it, to the needle.

　　"Buck up, laddie!" he roared encouragingly. "I had anticipated this.

　　Something seemed to tell me that your nerve would go when it came tothe point. You're deuced lucky, old horse, to have a man like me atyour side. Why, if you were alone, you wouldn't have a word to say foryourself. You'd just gape at the man and yammer. But I'm with youladdie, I'm with you. If your flow of conversation dries up, count onme to keep the thing going."And so it came about that, having reached the Cob and spying in thedistance the grey head of the professor bobbing about on the face ofthe waters, we dived in and swam rapidly towards him.

　　His face was turned in the opposite direction when we came up withhim. He was floating peacefully on his back, and it was plain that hehad not observed our approach. For when, treading water easily in hisrear, I wished him good morning in my most conciliatory tone, he stoodnot upon the order of his sinking, but went under like so much pig-iron.

　　I waited courteously until he rose to the surface again, when Irepeated my remark.

　　He expelled the last remnant of water from his mouth with a wrathfulsplutter, and cleared his eyes with the back of his hand. I confess toa slight feeling of apprehension as I met his gaze. Nor was myuneasiness diminished by the spectacle of Ukridge splashing tactfullyin the background like a large seal. Ukridge so far had made noremarks. He had dived in very flat, and I imagine that his breath hadnot yet returned to him. He had the air of one who intends to get usedto his surroundings before trusting himself to speech.

　　"The water is delightfully warm," I said.

　　"Oh, it's you!" said the professor; and I could not cheat myself intothe belief that he spoke cordially. Ukridge snorted loudly in theoffing. The professor turned sharply, as if anxious to observe thismarine phenomenon; and the annoyed gurgle which he gave showed that hewas not approving of Ukridge either. I did not approve of Ukridgemyself. I wished he had not come. Ukridge, in the water, lacksdignity. I felt that he prejudiced my case.