AFTER twenty-one years' absence, I felt a very strong desireto see the river again, and the steamboats, and such ofthe boys as might be left; so I resolved to go out there.

I enlisted a poet for company, and a stenographer to 'take him down,'

and started westward about the middle of April.

As I proposed to make notes, with a view to printing,I took some thought as to methods of procedure.

I reflected that if I were recognized, on the river, I shouldnot be as free to go and come, talk, inquire, and spy around,as I should be if unknown; I remembered that it was the customof steamboatmen in the old times to load up the confidingstranger with the most picturesque and admirable lies, and putthe sophisticated friend off with dull and ineffectual facts:

so I concluded, that, from a business point of view, it wouldbe an advantage to disguise our party with fictitious names.

The idea was certainly good, but it bred infinite bother;for although Smith, Jones, and Johnson are easy namesto remember when there is no occasion to remember them,it is next to impossible to recollect them when they are wanted.

How do criminals manage to keep a brand-new ALIAS in mind?

This is a great mystery. I was innocent; and yet was seldomable to lay my hand on my new name when it was needed;and it seemed to me that if I had had a crime on my conscienceto further confuse me, I could never have kept the name by meat all.

We left per Pennsylvania Railroad, at 8 A.M. April 18.

'EVENING. Speaking of dress. Grace and picturesqueness dropgradually out of it as one travels away from New York.'

I find that among my notes. It makes no differencewhich direction you take, the fact remains the same.

Whether you move north, south, east, or west, no matter:

you can get up in the morning and guess how far you have come,by noting what degree of grace and picturesqueness is bythat time lacking in the costumes of the new passengers,--I do not mean of the women alone, but of both sexes.

It may be that CARRIAGE is at the bottom of this thing;and I think it is; for there are plenty of ladies and gentlemenin the provincial cities whose garments are all made by the besttailors and dressmakers of New York; yet this has no perceptibleeffect upon the grand fact: the educated eye never mistakesthose people for New-Yorkers. No, there is a godless grace,and snap, and style about a born and bred New-Yorker which mereclothing cannot effect.

'APRIL 19. This morning, struck into the region of full goatees-sometimesaccompanied by a mustache, but only occasionally.'

It was odd to come upon this thick crop of an obsolete anduncomely fashion; it was like running suddenly across a forgottenacquaintance whom you had supposed dead for a generation.

The goatee extends over a wide extent of country; and is accompaniedby an iron-clad belief in Adam and the biblical history of creation,which has not suffered from the assaults of the scientists.

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