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Chapter I
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I am a sick man. . . . I am a spiteful man. I am an unattractive man. I believe my liver is diseased. However, I know nothing at all about my disease, and do not know for certain what ails1 me. I don’t consult a doctor for it, and never have, though I have a respect for medicine and doctors. Besides, I am extremely superstitious2, sufficiently3 so to respect medicine, anyway (I am well-educated enough not to be superstitious, but I am superstitious). No, I refuse to consult a doctor from spite. That you probably will not understand. Well, I understand it, though. Of course, I can’t explain who it is precisely4 that I am mortifying5 in this case by my spite: I am perfectly6 well aware that I cannot “pay out” the doctors by not consulting them; I know better than anyone that by all this I am only injuring myself and no one else. But still, if I don’t consult a doctor it is from spite. My liver is bad, well — let it get worse!
I have been going on like that for a long time — twenty years. Now I am forty. I used to be in the government service, but am no longer. I was a spiteful official. I was rude and took pleasure in being so. I did not take bribes7, you see, so I was bound to find a recompense in that, at least. (A poor jest, but I will not scratch it out. I wrote it thinking it would sound very witty8; but now that I have seen myself that I only wanted to show off in a despicable way, I will not scratch it out on purpose!)
When petitioners9 used to come for information to the table at which I sat, I used to grind my teeth at them, and felt intense enjoyment
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1
ails
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v.生病( ail的第三人称单数 );感到不舒服;处境困难;境况不佳 | |
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2
superstitious
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adj.迷信的 | |
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3
sufficiently
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adv.足够地,充分地 | |
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4
precisely
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adv.恰好,正好,精确地,细致地 | |
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5
mortifying
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adj.抑制的,苦修的v.使受辱( mortify的现在分词 );伤害(人的感情);克制;抑制(肉体、情感等) | |
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6
perfectly
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adv.完美地,无可非议地,彻底地 | |
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7
bribes
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n.贿赂( bribe的名词复数 );向(某人)行贿,贿赂v.贿赂( bribe的第三人称单数 );向(某人)行贿,贿赂 | |
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8
witty
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adj.机智的,风趣的 | |
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9
petitioners
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n.请求人,请愿人( petitioner的名词复数 );离婚案原告 | |
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10
enjoyment
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n.乐趣;享有;享用 | |
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humble
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adj.谦卑的,恭顺的;地位低下的;v.降低,贬低 | |
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12
feud
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n.长期不和;世仇;v.长期争斗;世代结仇 | |
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13
embittered
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v.使怨恨,激怒( embitter的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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random
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adj.随机的;任意的;n.偶然的(或随便的)行动 | |
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foam
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v./n.泡沫,起泡沫 | |
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16
appeased
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安抚,抚慰( appease的过去式和过去分词 ); 绥靖(满足另一国的要求以避免战争) | |
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positively
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adv.明确地,断然,坚决地;实在,确实 | |
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18
swarming
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密集( swarm的现在分词 ); 云集; 成群地移动; 蜜蜂或其他飞行昆虫成群地飞来飞去 | |
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19
craving
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n.渴望,热望 | |
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20
outlet
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n.出口/路;销路;批发商店;通风口;发泄 | |
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21
tormented
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饱受折磨的 | |
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remorse
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n.痛恨,悔恨,自责 | |
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rascal
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n.流氓;不诚实的人 | |
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taunting
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嘲讽( taunt的现在分词 ); 嘲弄; 辱骂; 奚落 | |
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consolation
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n.安慰,慰问 | |
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immoral
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adj.不道德的,淫荡的,荒淫的,有伤风化的 | |
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babble
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v.含糊不清地说,胡言乱语地说,儿语 | |
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solely
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adv.仅仅,唯一地 | |
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retired
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adj.隐退的,退休的,退役的 | |
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horrid
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adj.可怕的;令人惊恐的;恐怖的;极讨厌的 | |
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outskirts
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n.郊外,郊区 | |
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sage
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n.圣人,哲人;adj.贤明的,明智的 | |
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Part I Underground
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Chapter II
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