I GOT HOME THAT NIGHT at eleven, exhausted¹ and empty-handed. For a few moments I stood thinking at the bottom of the outside stairs. In the morning, Jill would be officially listed as "missing." I'd have to head up an investiga-tion into the disappearance² of one of my closest friends.

"I thought you'd want to know" - I heard a voice above me, catching³ me by surprise - "I heard back from Port-land."

I looked up and saw Molinari; he was sitting on the top step.

"They found a secretary at Portland State who leaked Propp's whereabouts to a boyfriend. They traced the gun to him. Local radical⁴. But I suspect that's not going to cheer you up much tonight."

"I thought you were supposed to be somebody important, Molinari," I said, too empty and tired to show how glad I was to see him. "How come you always end up babysitting me?"

He stood up. "I didn't want you to feel you have to be alone."

Suddenly I just couldn't hold back. The floodgates burst, and he came down and held me. Molinari drew me to him tightly as the tears carved their way down my cheeks. I felt ashamed to let him see me like this - I wanted so badly to appear strong - but I couldn't get the tears to stop.

"I'm sorry," I said, trying to catch myself.

"No" - he stroked my hair - "you don't have to pretend with me. You can let it out. There's no shame."

Something's happened to Jill! I wanted to scream, but I was afraid to lift my face.

"I'm sorry, too." He held me close. Then he squeezed me gently by the shoulders and looked into my swollen⁵ eyes. "I was with the Department of Justice," he said, and brushed away a few tears, "when the Trade Towers fell. I knew guys who were killed. Some of the fire chiefs, John O'Neill in Trade Center Security. I was one of the heads of the emer-gency response team, but when all the names started coming in, people I'd worked with, I couldn't take it anymore. I went into the men's room. I knew everything was on the line. But I sat in a stall and cried. There's no shame."

I unlocked the front door and we went inside. Molinari made me tea as I sat curled up on the couch, Martha's chin on my

点击收听单词发音  

1 exhausted
adj.极其疲惫的，精疲力尽的
参考例句：
It was a long haul home and we arrived exhausted.搬运回家的这段路程特别长，到家时我们已筋疲力尽。 Jenny was exhausted by the hustle of city life.珍妮被城市生活的忙乱弄得筋疲力尽。

2 disappearance
n.消失，消散，失踪
参考例句：
He was hard put to it to explain her disappearance.他难以说明她为什么不见了。 Her disappearance gave rise to the wildest rumours.她失踪一事引起了各种流言蜚语。

3 catching
adj.易传染的，有魅力的，迷人的，接住
参考例句：
There are those who think eczema is catching.有人就是认为湿疹会传染。 Enthusiasm is very catching.热情非常富有感染力。

4 radical
n.激进份子，原子团，根号；adj.根本的，激进的，彻底的
参考例句：
The patient got a radical cure in the hospital.病人在医院得到了根治。 She is radical in her demands.她的要求十分偏激。

5 swollen
adj.肿大的，水涨的；v.使变大，肿胀
参考例句：
Her legs had got swollen from standing up all day.因为整天站着，她的双腿已经肿了。 A mosquito had bitten her and her arm had swollen up.蚊子叮了她，她的手臂肿起来了。

6 thigh
n.大腿；股骨
参考例句：
He is suffering from a strained thigh muscle.他的大腿肌肉拉伤了，疼得很。 The thigh bone is connected to the hip bone.股骨连着髋骨。

7 clenched
v.紧握，抓紧，咬紧( clench的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句：
He clenched his fists in anger. 他愤怒地攥紧了拳头。 She clenched her hands in her lap to hide their trembling. 她攥紧双手放在腿上，以掩饰其颤抖。 来自《简明英汉词典》