For the benefit of any ardent26 damsel whose patriotic27 fancy may have surrounded hospital life with a halo of charms, I will briefly28 describe the bower29 to which I retired30, in a somewhat ruinous condition. It was well ventilated, for five panes31 of glass had suffered compound fractures,which all the surgeons and nurses had failed to heal; the two windows were draped with sheets, the church hospital opposite being a brick and mortar32 Argus, and the female mind cherishing a prejudice in favor of retiracy during the night-capped periods of existence. A bare floor supported two narrow iron beds, spread with thin mattresses33 like plasters, furnished with pillows in the last stages of consumption. In a fire place, guiltless of shovel34, [Page 68] tongs35, andirons, or grate, burned a log inch by inch, being too long to to go on all at once; so, while the fire blazed away at one end, I did the same at the other, as I tripped over it a dozen times a day, and flew up to poke36 it a dozen times at night. A mirror (let us be elegant !) of the dimensions of a muffin, and about as reflective, hung over a tin basin, blue pitcher37, and a brace38 of yellow mugs. Two invalid39 tables, ditto chairs, wandered here and there, and the closet contained a varied40 collection of bonnets41, bottles, bags, boots, bread and butter, boxes and bugs42. The closet was a regular Blue Beard cupboard to me; I always opened it with fear and trembling, owing to rats, and shut it in anguish43 of spirit; for time and space were not to be had, and chaos44 reigned45 along with the rats. Our chimney-piece was decorated with a flat-iron, a Bible, a candle minus stick, a lavender bottle, a new tin pan, so brilliant that it served nicely for a pier-glass, and such of the portly black bugs as preferred a warmer climate than the rubbish hole afforded. Two arks, commonly called trunks, lurked46 behind the door, containing the worldly goods of the twain who laughed and cried, slept and scrambled47, in this refuge; while from the white-washed walls above either bed, looked down the pictured faces of those whose memory can make for us-"One little room an everywhere."For a day or two I managed to appear at meals; for the human grub must eat till the butterfly is ready to break loose, and no one had time to come up two flights while it was possible for me to come down. Far be it from me to add another affliction or reproach to that enduring man, the steward49; for, compared with his predecessor50, he was a horn of plenty; but-I put it to any candid51 mind-is not the [Page 69] following bill of fare susceptible52 of improvement, without plunging53 the nation madly into debt ? The three meals were "pretty much of a muchness," and consisted of beef, evidently put down for the men of '76; pork, just in from the street; army bread, composed of saw-dust and saleratus; butter, salt as if churned by Lot's wife; stewed54 blackberries, so much like preserved cockroaches55, that only those devoid56 of imagination could partake thereof with relish57; coffee, mild and muddy; tea, three dried huckleberry leaves to a quart of water-flavored with lime-also animated58 and unconscious of any approach to clearness. Variety being the spice of life, a small pinch of the article would have been appreciated by the hungry, hard-working sisterhood, one of whom, though accustomed to plain fare, soon found herself reduced to bread and water; having an inborn59 repugnance60 to the fat of the land, and the salt of the earth.
Another peculiarity61 of these hospital meals was the rapidity with which the edibles62 vanished, and the impossibility of getting a drop or crumb63 after the usual time. At the first ring of the bell, a general stampede took place; some twenty hungry souls rushed to the dining-room, swept over the table like a swarm64 of locusts65, and left no fragment for any tardy66 creature who arrived fifteen minutes late. Thinking it of more importance that the patients should be well and comfortably fed, I took my time about my own meals for the first day or two after I came, but was speedily enlightened by Isaac, the black waiter, who bore with me a few times, and then informed me, looking as stern as fate:
"I say, mam, ef you comes so late you can't have no vittles,-'cause I'm 'bleeged fer ter git things ready fer de doctors 'mazin' spry arter you nusses and folks is done. De gen'lemen don't kere fer ter wait, no more does I; so you [Page 70] jes' please ter come at de time, and dere won't be no frettin' nowheres."It was a new sensation to stand looking at a full table, painfully conscious of one of the vacuums which Nature abhors67, and receive orders to right about face,without partaking of the nourishment68 which your inner woman clamorously demanded. The doctors always fared better than we; and for a moment a desperate impulse prompted me to give them a hint, by walking off with the mutton, or confiscating69 the pie. But Ike's eye was on me, and, to my shame be it spoken, I walked meekly71 away; went dinnerless that day, and that evening went to market, laying in a small stock of crackers73, cheese and apples,that my boys might not be neglected, nor myself obliged to bolt solid and liquid dyspepsias, or starve. This plan would have succeeded admirably had not the evil star under which I was born, been in the ascendant during that month, and cast its malign74 influences even into my " 'umble " larder75; for the rats had their dessert off my cheese, the bugs set up housekeeping in my cracker72 bag, and the apples like all worldly riches, took to themselves wings and flew away; whither no man could tell, though certain black imps76 might have thrown light upon the matter, had not the plaintiff in the case been loth to add another to the many trials of long-suffering. Africa. After this failure I resigned myself to fate, and, remembering that bread was called the staff of life, leaned pretty exclusively upon it; but it proved a broken reed, and I came to the ground after a few weeks of prison fare, varied by an occasional potato or surreptitious sip77 of milk.
Very soon after leaving the care of my ward, I discovered that I had no appetite, and cut the bread and butter interests almost entirely78, trying the exercise and sun cure instead. [Page 71] Flattering myself that I had plenty of time, and could see all that was to be seen, so far as a lone2 lorn female could venture in a city, one-half of whose male population seemed to be taking the other half to the guard-house,-every morning I took a brisk run in one direction or another; for the January days were as mild as Spring. A rollicking north wind and occasional snow storm would have been more to my taste, for the one would have braced79 and refreshed tired body and soul, the other have purified the air,and spread a clean coverlid over the bed, wherein the capital of these United States appeared to be dozing80 pretty soundly just then.
One of these trips was to the Armory81 Hospital, the neatness, comfort, and convenience of which makes it an honor to its presiding genius, and arouses all the covetous82 propensities83 of such nurses as came from other hospitals to visit it.
The long, clean, warm, and airy wards84, built barrack-fashion, with the nurse's room at the end, were fully21 appreciated by Nurse Periwinkle, whose ward and private bower were cold, dirty, inconvenient85, up stairs and down stairs, and in every body's chamber86. At the Armory, in ward K, I found a cheery, bright-eyed, white-aproned little lady, reading at her post near the stove; matting under her feet; a draft of fresh air flowing in above her head; a table full of trays, glasses, and such matters, on one side, a large, well-stocked medicine chest on the other; and all her duty seemed to be going about now and then to give doses, issue orders, which well-trained attendants executed, and pet, advise, or comfort Tom, Dick, or Harry89, as she found best. As I watched the proceedings90, I recalled my own tribulations91, and contrasted the two hospitals in a way that would have caused my summary dismissal, could it have been reported at headquarters. Here, order, method, common sense and liberality reigned and ruled, in a style [Page 72] that did one's heart good to see; at the Hurly burly Hotel, disorder92, discomfort93, bad management, and no visible head, reduced things to a condition which I despair of describing. The circumlocution95 fashion prevailed, forms and fusses tormented96 our souls, and unnecessary strictness in one place was counterbalanced by unpardonable laxity in another. Here is a sample : I am dressing97 Sam Dammer's shoulder; and, having cleansed98 the wound, look about for some strips of adhesive99 plaster to hold on the little square of wet linen100 which is to cover the gunshot wound; the case is not in the tray; Frank, the sleepy, half-sick attendant, knows nothing of it; we rummage101 high and low; Sam is tired, and fumes8; Frank dawdles102 and yawns; the men advise and laugh at the flurry; I feel like a boiling tea-kettle, with the lid ready to fly off and damage somebody.
"Go and borrow some from the next ward, and spend the rest of the day in finding ours," I finally command. A pause; then Frank scuffles back with the message: "Miss Peppercorn ain't got none, and says you ain't no business to lose your own duds and go borrowin' other folkses;." I say nothing, for fear of saying too much, but fly to the surgery. Mr. Toddypestle informs me that I can't have anything without an order from the surgeon of my ward. Great heavens ! where is he? and away I rush, up and down, here and there, till at last I find him, in a state of bliss104 over a complicated amputation105, in the fourth story. I make my demand; be answers: "In five minutes," and works away, with his head upside down, as he ties an artery106, saws a bone, or does a little needle-work, with a visible relish and very sanguinary pair of hands. The five minutes grow to fifteen, and Frank appears, with the remark that, "Dammer wants to know what in thunder you are keeping him there with his finger on a wet rag for?" Dr. P. [Page 73] tears himself away long enough to scribble107 the order, with which I plunge108 downward to the surgery again, find the door locked, and, while hammering away on it, am told that two friends are waiting to see me in the hall. The matron being away, her parlor109 is locked, and there is nowhere to see my guests but in my own room, and no time to enjoy them till the plaster is found. I settle this matter, and circulate through the house to find Toddypestle, who has no right, to leave the surgery till night. He is discovered in the dead house, smoking a cigar; and very much the worse for his researches among the spirituous preparations that fill the surgery shelves. He is inclined to be gallant110, and puts the finishing blow to the fire of my wrath111; for the tea-kettle lid flies off, and driving him before me to his post, I fling down the order, take what I choose; and, leaving the absurd incapable112 kissing his hand to me, depart, feeling,as Grandma Riglesty is reported to have done, when she vainly sought for chips, in Bimleck Jackwood's "shifless paster."I find Dammer a well acted charade113 of his own name, and, just as I get him done, struggling the while with a burning desire to clap an adhesive strip across his mouth, full of heaven-defying oaths, Frank takes up his boot to put it on, and exclaims :
"I'm blest ef here ain't that case now ! I recollect114 seeing it pitch in this mornin', but forgot all about it, till my heel went smash inter12 it. Here, ma'am, ketch hold on it, and give the boys a sheet on't all round, 'gainst it tumbles inter t'other boot next time yer want it."If a look could annihilate115, Francis Saucebox would have ceased to exist; but it couldn't; therefore, he yet lives, to aggravate116 some unhappy woman's soul, and wax fat in some equally congenial situation. [Page 74]
Now, while I'm freeing my mind, I should like to enter my protest against employing convalescents as attendants, instead of strong, properly trained, and cheerful men. How it may be in other places I cannot say; but here it was a source of constant trouble and confusion, these feeble, ignorant men trying to sweep, scrub, lift, and wait upon their sicker comrades. One, with a diseased heart, was expected to run up and down stairs, carry heavy trays, and move helpless men; he tried it, and grew rapidly worse than when he first came: and, when he was ordered out to march away to the convalescent hospital, fell, in a sort of fit, before he turned the corner, and was brought back to die. Another, hurt by a fall from his horse, endeavored to do his duty, but failed entirely, and the wrath of the ward master fell upon the nurse, who must either scrub the rooms herself, or take the lecture; for the boy looked stout117 and well, and the master never happened to see him turn white with pain, or hear him groan118 in his sleep when an involuntary. motion strained his poor back. Constant complaints were being made of incompetent119 attendants, and some dozen women did double duty, and then were blamed for breaking down. If any hospital director fancies this a good and economical arrangement, allow one used up nurse to tell him it isn't, and beg him to spare the sisterhood, who sometimes, in their sympathy, forget that they are mortal, and run the risk of being made immortal120, sooner than is agreeable to their partial friends.
Another of my few rambles121 took me to the Senate Chamber, hoping to hear and see if this large machine was run any better than some small ones I knew of. I was too late, and found the Speaker's chair occupied by a colored gentleman of ten; while two others were "on their legs," having a hot debate on the cornball question, as they gathered the waste [Page 75] paper strewn about the floor into bags; and several white members played leap-frog over the desks, a much wholesomer relaxation122 than some of the older Senators indulge in, I fancy. Finding the coast clear, I likewise gambolled123 up and down, from gallery to gallery; sat in Sumner's chair. and cudgelled an imaginary Brooks124 within an inch of his life; examined Wilson's books in the coolest possible manner; warmed my feet at one of the national registers; read people's names on scattered126 envelopes, and pocketed a castaway autograph or two; watched the somewhat unparliamentary proceedings going on about me, and wondered who in the world all the sedate127 gentlemen were, who kept popping out of odd doors here and there, like respectable Jacks-in-the-box. Then I wandered over the "palatial128 residence" of Mrs. Columbia, and examined its many beauties, though I can't say I thought her a tidy housekeeper129, and didn't admire her taste in pictures, for the eye of this humble130 individual soon wearied of expiring patriots131, who all appeared to be quitting their earthly tabernacles in convulsions, ruffled132 shirts, and a whirl of torn banners, bomb shells, and buff and blue arms and legs. The statuary also was massive and concrete, but rather wearying to examine; for the colossal133 ladies and gentlemen, carried no cards of introduction in face or figure; so, whether the meditative134 party in a kilt, with well-developed legs, shoes like army slippers135, and a ponderous136 nose, was Columbus, Cato, or Cockelorum Tibby, the tragedian, was more than I could tell. Several robust137 ladies attracted me; but which was America and which Pocahontas was a mystery; for all affected138 much looseness of costume, dishevelment of hair, swords, arrows, lances, scales, and other ornaments139 quite passé with damsels of our day, whose effigies140 should go down to posterity141 armed [Page 76] with fans, crochet142 needles, riding whips, and parasols, with here and there one holding pen or pencil, rolling-pin or broom. The statue of Liberty I recognized at once, for it had no pedestal as yet, but stood flat in the mud, with Young America most symbollically making dirt pies, and chip forts, in its shadow. But high above the squabbling little throng143 and their petty plans, the sun shone full on Liberty's broad forehead, and, in her hand, some summer bird had built its nest. I accepted the good omen14 then, and, on the first of January, the Emancipation144 Act gave the statue a nobler and more enduring pedestal than any marble or granite145 ever carved and quarried146 by human bands.
One trip to Georgetown Heights, where cedars147 sighed overhead, dead leaves rustled148 underfoot, pleasant paths led up and down, and a brook125 wound like a silver snake by the blackened ruins of some French Minister's house, through the poor gardens of the black washerwomen who congregated149 there, and, passing the cemetery150 with a murmurous151 lullaby, rolled away to pay its little tribute to the river. This breezy run was the last I took; for, on the morrow, came rain and wind: and confinement152 soon proved a powerful reinforcement to the enemy, who was quietly preparing to spring a mine, and blow me five hundred miles from the position I had taken in what I called my Chickahominy Swamp.
Shut up in my room, with no voice, spirits, or books, that week was not a holiday, by any means. Finding meals a humbug153, I stopped away altogether, trusting that if this sparrow was of any worth, the Lord would not let it fall to the ground. Like a flock of friendly ravens154, my sister nurses fed me, not only with food for the body, but kind words for the mind; and soon, from being half starved, I found myself so beteaed and betoasted, petted and served, that I was quite "in the lap [Page 77] of luxury," in spite of cough, headache, a painful consciousness of my pleura, and a realizing sense of bones in the human frame. From the pleasant house on the hill, the home in the heart of Washington, and the Willard caravansary, came friends new and old,with bottles, baskets, carriages and invitations for the invalid; and daily our Florence Nightingale climbed the steep stairs, stealing a moment from her busy life, to watch over the stranger, of whom she was as thoughtfully tender as any mother. Long may she wave! Whatever others may think or say, Nurse Periwinkle is forever grateful; and among her relics155 of that Washington defeat, none is more valued than the little book which appeared on her pillow, one dreary156 day; for the D D. written in it means to her far more than Doctor of Divinity.
Being forbidden to meddle157 with fleshly arms and legs, I solaced158 myself by mending cotton ones, and, as I sat sewing at my window, watched the moving panorama160 that passed below; amusing myself with taking notes of the most striking figures in it. Long trains of army wagons161 kept up a perpetual rumble163 from morning till night; ambulances rattled164 to and fro with busy surgeons, nurses taking an airing, or convalescents going in parties to be fitted to artificial limbs. Strings165 of sorry looking horses passed, saying as plainly as dumb creatures could, "Why, in a city full of them, is there no horse pital for us?" Often a cart came by, with several rough coffins166 in it and no mourners following; baroucbes, with invalid officers, rolled round the corner, and carriage loads of pretty children, with black coachmen, footmen, and maids. The women who took their walks abroad, were so extinguished in three story bonnets,with overhanging balconies of flowers, that their charms were obscured; and all I can say of them is that they dressed in the worst possible taste, and walked like ducks. [Page 78]
The men did the picturesque167, and did it so well that Washington looked like a mammoth168 masquerade. Spanish hats, scarlet169 lined riding cloaks, swords and sashes, high boots and bright spurs, beards and mustaches, which made plain faces comely170, and comely faces heroic; these vanities of the flesh transformed our butchers, bakers171, and candlestick makers172 into gallant riders of gaily173 caparisoned horses, much handsomer than themselves; and dozens of such figures were constantly prancing174 by, with private prickings of spurs, for the benefit of the perambulating flower-bed. Some of these gentlemen affected painfully tight uniforms, and little caps, kept on by some new law of gravitation, as they covered only the bridge of the nose, yet never fell off; the men looked like stuffed fowls175, and rode as if the safety of the nation depended on their speed alone. The fattest, greyest officers dressed most, and ambled48 statelily along, with orderlies behind, trying to look as if they didn't know the stout party in front, and doing much caracoling on their own account.
The mules177 were my especial delight; and an hour's study of a constant succession of them introduced me to many of their characteristics; for six of these odd little beasts drew each army wagon162, and went hopping178 like frogs through the stream of mud that gently rolled along the street. The coquettish mule176 had small feet, a nicely trimmed tassel179 of a tail, perked180 up ears, and seemed much given to little tosses of the head, affected skips and prances181; and, if he wore the bells, or were bedizzened with a bit of finery, put on as many airs as any belle182. The moral mule was a stout, hard-working creature, always tugging183 with all his might; often pulling away after the rest had stopped, laboring184 under the conscientious185 delusion186 that food for the entire army depended upon his private exertions187. I respected this style of mule; and had [Page 79] I possessed188 a juicy cabbage, would have pressed it upon him, with thanks for his excellent example. The historical mule was a melo-dramatic quadruped, prone88 to startling humanity by erratic189 leaps, and wild plunges190, much shaking of his stubborn head, and lashing191 out of his vicious heels; now and then falling flat and apparently192 dying a la Forrest : a gasp-a squirm-a flop193, and so on, till the street was well blocked up, the drivers all swearing like demons194 in bad hats, and the chief actor's circulation decidedly quickened by every variety of kick, cuff103 jerk,and haul. When the last breath seemed to have left his body, and "Doctors were in vain," a sudden resurrection took place; and if ever a mule laughed with scornful triumph, that was the beast, as he leisurely196 rose, gave a comfortable shake, and calmly regarding the excited crowd seemed to say-"A hit ! a decided195 bit ! for the stupidest of animals has bamboozled197 a dozen men. Now, then ! what are you stopping the way for?" The pathetic mule was, perhaps, the most interesting of all; for, though he always seemed to be the smallest, thinnest, weakest of the six, the postillion, with big boots, long-tailed coat, and heavy whip, was sureto bestride this one, who struggled feebly along, head down, coat muddy and rough, eye spiritless and sad, his very tail a mortified198 stump199, and the whole beast a picture of meek70 misery200, fit to touch a heart of stone. The jovial201 mule was a roly poly, happy-go-lucky little piece of horse-flesh, taking everything easily, from cudgeling to caressing202; strolling along with a roguish twinkle of the eye, and, if the thing were possible, would have had his hands in his pockets, and whistled as he went. If there ever chanced to be an apple core, a stray turnip203, or wisp of hay, in the gutter204, this Mark Tapley was sure to find it, and none of his mates seemed to begrudge205 him his bite. I suspected this fellow was the peacemaker, [Page 80] confidant and friend of all the others, for he had a sort of "Cheer-up,-old-boy,-I'll-pull-you-through" look, which was exceedingly engaging.
Pigs also possessed attractions for me, never having had an opportunity of observing their graces of mind and manner, till I came to Washington, whose porcine citizens appeared to enjoy a larger liberty than many of its human ones. Stout, sedate looking pigs, hurried by each morning to their places of business, with a preoccupied206 air,and sonorous207 greeting to their friends. Genteel pigs, with an extra curl to their tails, promenaded208 in pairs, lunching here and there, like gentlemen of leisure. Rowdy pigs pushed the passers by off the side walk; tipsy pigs hiccoughed their version of "We wont209 go home till morning," from the gutter; and delicate young pigs tripped daintily through the mud, as if, like "Mrs. Peery-bingle," they plumed210 themselves upon their ankles, and kept themselves particularly neat in point of stockings. Maternal211 pigs, with their interesting families, strolled by in the sun; and often the pink, baby-like squealers Iay down for a nap, with a trust in Providence212 worthy213 of human imitation.
But more interesting than officers, ladies, mules, or pigs, were my colored brothers and sisters, because so unlike the respectable members of society I'd known in moral Boston.
Here was the genuine article-no, not the genuine article at all, we must go to Africa for that-but the sort of creatures generations of slavery have made them: obsequious214, trickish, lazy and ignorant, yet kind-hearted, merry-tempered, quick to feel and accept the least token of the brotherly love which is slowly teaching the white hand to grasp the black, in this great struggle for the liberty of both the races.
Having been warned not to be too rampant215 on the subject of slavery, as secesh principles flourished even under the [Page 81] respectable nose of Father Abraham, I had endeavored to walk discreetly216, and curb217 my unruly member; looking about me with all my eyes, the while, and saving up the result of my observations for future use. I had not been there a week before the neglected, devil-may care expression in many of the faces about me, seemed an urgent appeal to leave nursing white bodies, and take some care for these black souls. Much as the lazy boys and saucy218 girls tormented me, I liked them, and found that any show of interest or friendliness219 brought out the better traits which live in the most degraded and forsaken220 of us all. I liked their cheerfulness, for the dreariest221 old hag, who scrubbed all day in that pestilential steam, gossipped and grinned all the way out, when night set her free from drudgery222. The girls romped223 with their dusky sweethearts, or tossed their babies, with the tender pride that makes mother-love a beautifier to the homeliest face. The men and boys sang and whistled all day long; and often, as I held my watch, the silence of the night was sweetly broken by some chorus from the street, full of real melody, whether the song was of heaven, or of hoe-cakes; and, as I listened, I felt that we never should doubt nor despair concerning a race which, through such griefs and wrongs, still clings to this good gift, and seems to solace159 with it the patient hearts that wait and watch and hope until the end.
I expected to have to defend myself from accusations224 of prejudice against color; but was surprised to find things just the other way, and daily shocked some neighbor by treating the blacks as I did the whites. The men would swear at the "darkies," would put two gs into negro, and scoff225 at the idea of any good coming from such trash. The nurses were willing to be served by the colored people, but seldom thanked them, never praised, and scarcely recognized them in the street; [Page 82] whereat the blood of two generations of abolitionists waxed hot in my veins226, and, at the first opportunity, proclaimed itself, and asserted the right of free speech as doggedly227 as the irrepressible Folsom herself.
Happening to catch up a funny little black baby, who was toddling228 about the nurses' kitchen, one day, when I went down to make a mess for some of my men, a Virginia woman standing229 by elevated her most prominent features, with a sniff230 of disapprobation, exclaiming:
"Gracious, Miss P.! how can you? I've been here six months. and never so much as touched the little toad231 with a poker232.""More shame for you, ma'am," responded Miss P.; and, with the natural perversity233 of a Yankee, followed up the blow by kissing "the toad," with ardor234. His face was providentially as clean and shiny as if his mamma had just polished it up with a corner of her apron87 and a drop from the tea-kettle spout235, like old Aunt Chloe, This rash act, and the anti-slavery lecture that followed, while one hand stirred gruel236 for sick America, and the other hugged baby Africa, did not produce the cheering result which I fondly expected; for my comrade henceforth regarded me as a dangerous fanatic237, and my protegé nearly came to his death by insisting on swarming238 up stairs to my room, on all occasions, and being walked on like a little black spider.
I waited for New Year's day with more eagerness than I had ever known before; and, though it brought me no gift, I felt rich in the act of justice so tardily239 performed toward some of those about me. As the bells rung midnight, I electrified240 my room-mate by dancing out of bed, throwing up the window, and flapping my handkerchief, with a feeble cheer, in answer to the shout of a group of colored men in the street [Page 83] below. All night they tooted and tramped, fired crackers, sung " Glory, Hallelujah," and took comfort, poor souls ! in their own way. The sky was clear, the moon shone benignly241, a mild wind blew across the river, and all good omens242 seemed to usher243 in the dawn of the day whose noontide cannot now be long in coming. If the colored people had taken hands and danced around the White House, with a few cheers for the much abused gentleman who has immortalized himself by one just act, no President could have had a finer levee, or one to be prouder of.
While these sights and sounds were going on without, curious scenes were passing within, and I was learning that one of the best methods of fitting oneself to be a nurse in a hospital, is to be a patient there; for then only can one wholly realize what the men suffer and sigh for; how acts of kindness touch and win; how much or little we are to those about us; and for the first time really see that in coming there we have taken our lives in our hands, and may have to pay dearly for a brief experience. Every one was very kind; the attendants of my ward often came up to report progress, to fill my wood box, or bring messages and presents from my boys. The nurses took many steps with those tired feet of theirs, and several came each evening, to chat over my fire and make things cozy244 for the night. The doctors paid daily visits, tapped at my lungs to see if pneumonia was within, left doses without names, and went away, leaving me as ignorant, and much more uncomfortable than when they came. Hours began to get confused; people looked odd; queer faces haunted the room, and the nights were one long fight with weariness and pain. Letters from home grew anxious; the doctors lifted their eyebrows245, and nodded ominously246; friends said "Don't stay," and an internal rebellion seconded the advice; [Page 84] but the three months were not out, and the idea of giving up so soon was proclaiming a defeat before I was fairly routed; so to all "Don't stays" I opposed "I wills," till, one fine morning, a gray-headed gentleman rose like a welcome ghost on my hearth247; and, at the sight of him, my resolution melted away, my heart turned traitor248 to my boys, and, when he said, "Come home," I answered, "Yes, father;" and so ended my career as an army nurse.
I never shall regret the going, though a sharp tussle249 with typhoid, ten dollars, and a wig250, are all the visible results of the experiment; for one may live and learn much in a month. A good fit of illness proves the value of health; real danger tries one's mettle251; and self-sacrifice sweetens character. Let no one who sincerely desires to help the work on in this way, delay going through any fear; for the worth of life lies in the experiences that fill it, and this is one which cannot be forgotten. All that is best and bravest in the hearts of men and women, comes out in scenes like these; and, though a hospital is a rough school, its lessons are both stern and salutary; and the humblest of pupils there, in proportion to his faithfulness, learns a deeper faith in God and in himself. I, for one, would return tomorrow, on the "up-again,-and-take-another " principle, if I could; for the amount of pleasure and profit I got out of that month compensates252 for all after pangs253; and, though a sadly womanish feeling, I take some satisfaction in the thought that, if I could not lay my head on the altar of my country, I have my hair; and that is more than handsome Helen did for her dead husband, when she sacrificed only the ends of her ringlets on his urn24. Therefore, I close this little chapter of hospital experiences, with the regret that they were no better worth recording254; and add the poetical255 gem94 with [Page 85] which I console myself for the untimely demise256 of "Nurse Periwinkle:"Oh, lay her in a little pit,With a marble stone to cover it;And carve thereon a gruel spoon,To show a "nuss" has died too soon.
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| n.守卫，监护，病房，行政区，由监护人或法院保护的人（尤指儿童）；vt.守护，躲开 | |
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lone
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| adj.孤寂的，单独的；唯一的 | |
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prudent
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| adj.谨慎的，有远见的，精打细算的 | |
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4
bouquet
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| n.花束，酒香 | |
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5
paternal
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| adj.父亲的，像父亲的，父系的，父方的 | |
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6
frail
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| adj.身体虚弱的；易损坏的 | |
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7
disporting
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| v.嬉戏，玩乐，自娱( disport的现在分词 ) | |
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8
fumes
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| n.(强烈而刺激的)气味，气体 | |
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9
frolicsome
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| adj.嬉戏的，闹着玩的 | |
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10
pneumonia
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| n.肺炎 | |
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11
obstinacy
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| n.顽固；（病痛等）难治 | |
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12
inter
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| v.埋葬 | |
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13
phenomena
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| n.现象 | |
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14
omen
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| n.征兆，预兆；vt.预示 | |
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15
ignominiously
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| adv.耻辱地，屈辱地，丢脸地 | |
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16
cannon
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| n.大炮，火炮；飞机上的机关炮 | |
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17
cleave
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| v．(clave；cleaved)粘着，粘住；坚持；依恋 | |
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18
unnaturally
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| adv.违反习俗地；不自然地；勉强地；不近人情地 | |
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19
derisively
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|
| adv. 嘲笑地，嘲弄地 | |
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20
gracefully
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| ad.大大方方地；优美地 | |
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21
fully
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| adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地 | |
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22
valedictory
|
|
| adj.告别的；n.告别演说 | |
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23
fervent
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|
| adj.热的，热烈的，热情的 | |
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24
urn
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|
| n.（有座脚的）瓮；坟墓；骨灰瓮 | |
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25
ascended
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|
| v.上升，攀登( ascend的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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26
ardent
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，强烈的，烈性的 | |
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27
patriotic
|
|
| adj.爱国的，有爱国心的 | |
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28
briefly
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|
| adv.简单地，简短地 | |
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29
bower
|
|
| n.凉亭，树荫下凉快之处；闺房；v.荫蔽 | |
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30
retired
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|
| adj.隐退的，退休的，退役的 | |
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31
panes
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| 窗玻璃( pane的名词复数 ) | |
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32
mortar
|
|
| n.灰浆，灰泥；迫击炮；v.把…用灰浆涂接合 | |
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33
mattresses
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|
| 褥垫，床垫( mattress的名词复数 ) | |
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34
shovel
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|
| n.铁锨，铲子，一铲之量；v.铲，铲出 | |
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35
tongs
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| n.钳；夹子 | |
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36
poke
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|
| n.刺，戳，袋；vt.拨开，刺，戳；vi.戳，刺，捅，搜索，伸出，行动散慢 | |
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37
pitcher
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| n.(有嘴和柄的)大水罐；(棒球)投手 | |
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38
brace
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|
| n. 支柱,曲柄,大括号; v. 绷紧,顶住,(为困难或坏事)做准备 | |
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39
invalid
|
|
| n.病人，伤残人；adj.有病的，伤残的；无效的 | |
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40
varied
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|
| adj.多样的，多变化的 | |
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41
bonnets
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|
| n.童帽( bonnet的名词复数 )；（烟囱等的）覆盖物；（苏格兰男子的）无边呢帽；（女子戴的）任何一种帽子 | |
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42
bugs
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|
| adj.疯狂的，发疯的n.窃听器( bug的名词复数 )；病菌；虫子；[计算机]（制作软件程序所产生的意料不到的）错误 | |
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43
anguish
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|
| n.(尤指心灵上的)极度痛苦，烦恼 | |
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44
chaos
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|
| n.混乱，无秩序 | |
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45
reigned
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|
| vi.当政，统治（reign的过去式形式） | |
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46
lurked
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| vi.潜伏，埋伏（lurk的过去式与过去分词形式） | |
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47
scrambled
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|
| v.快速爬行( scramble的过去式和过去分词 )；攀登；争夺；（军事飞机）紧急起飞 | |
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48
ambled
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|
| v.（马）缓行( amble的过去式和过去分词 )；从容地走，漫步 | |
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49
steward
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|
| n.乘务员，服务员；看管人；膳食管理员 | |
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50
predecessor
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|
| n.前辈，前任 | |
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51
candid
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|
| adj.公正的，正直的；坦率的 | |
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52
susceptible
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|
| adj.过敏的，敏感的；易动感情的，易受感动的 | |
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53
plunging
|
|
| adj.跳进的，突进的v.颠簸( plunge的现在分词 )；暴跌；骤降；突降 | |
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54
stewed
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|
| adj.焦虑不安的，烂醉的v.炖( stew的过去式和过去分词 )；煨；思考；担忧 | |
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55
cockroaches
|
|
| n.蟑螂( cockroach的名词复数 ) | |
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56
devoid
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|
| adj.全无的，缺乏的 | |
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57
relish
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|
| n.滋味，享受，爱好，调味品；vt.加调味料，享受，品味；vi.有滋味 | |
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58
animated
|
|
| adj.生气勃勃的，活跃的，愉快的 | |
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59
inborn
|
|
| adj.天生的，生来的，先天的 | |
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60
repugnance
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|
| n.嫌恶 | |
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61
peculiarity
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|
| n.独特性，特色；特殊的东西；怪癖 | |
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62
edibles
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| 可以吃的，可食用的( edible的名词复数 )； 食物 | |
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63
crumb
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|
| n.饼屑，面包屑，小量 | |
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64
swarm
|
|
| n.(昆虫)等一大群；vi.成群飞舞；蜂拥而入 | |
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65
locusts
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|
| n.蝗虫( locust的名词复数 )；贪吃的人；破坏者；槐树 | |
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66
tardy
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|
| adj.缓慢的，迟缓的 | |
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67
abhors
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|
| v.憎恶( abhor的第三人称单数 )；（厌恶地）回避；拒绝；淘汰 | |
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68
nourishment
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|
| n.食物，营养品；营养情况 | |
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69
confiscating
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| 没收（confiscate的现在分词形式） | |
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70
meek
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|
| adj.温顺的，逆来顺受的 | |
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71
meekly
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|
| adv.温顺地，逆来顺受地 | |
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72
cracker
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|
| n.（无甜味的）薄脆饼干 | |
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73
crackers
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|
| adj.精神错乱的，癫狂的n.爆竹( cracker的名词复数 )；薄脆饼干；（认为）十分愉快的事；迷人的姑娘 | |
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74
malign
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|
| adj.有害的；恶性的；恶意的；v.诽谤，诬蔑 | |
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75
larder
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|
| n.食物贮藏室，食品橱 | |
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76
imps
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|
| n.（故事中的）小恶魔( imp的名词复数 )；小魔鬼；小淘气；顽童 | |
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77
sip
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|
| v.小口地喝，抿，呷；n.一小口的量 | |
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78
entirely
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|
| ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地 | |
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79
braced
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|
| adj.拉牢的v.支住( brace的过去式和过去分词 )；撑牢；使自己站稳；振作起来 | |
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80
dozing
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|
| v.打瞌睡,假寐 n.瞌睡 | |
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81
armory
|
|
| n.纹章，兵工厂，军械库 | |
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82
covetous
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|
| adj.贪婪的，贪心的 | |
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83
propensities
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|
| n.倾向，习性( propensity的名词复数 ) | |
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84
wards
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|
| 区( ward的名词复数 )； 病房； 受监护的未成年者； 被人照顾或控制的状态 | |
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85
inconvenient
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|
| adj.不方便的，令人感到麻烦的 | |
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86
chamber
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| n.房间，寝室；会议厅；议院；会所 | |
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87
apron
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| n.围裙；工作裙 | |
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88
prone
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|
| adj.(to)易于…的，很可能…的；俯卧的 | |
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89
harry
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|
| vt.掠夺，蹂躏，使苦恼 | |
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90
proceedings
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| n.进程，过程，议程；诉讼(程序)；公报 | |
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91
tribulations
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| n.苦难( tribulation的名词复数 )；艰难；苦难的缘由；痛苦 | |
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92
disorder
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| n.紊乱，混乱；骚动，骚乱；疾病，失调 | |
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93
discomfort
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|
| n.不舒服，不安，难过，困难，不方便 | |
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94
gem
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|
| n.宝石，珠宝；受爱戴的人 [同]jewel | |
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95
circumlocution
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|
| n. 绕圈子的话，迂回累赘的陈述 | |
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96
tormented
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| 饱受折磨的 | |
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97
dressing
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|
| n.(食物)调料；包扎伤口的用品，敷料 | |
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98
cleansed
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| 弄干净，清洗( cleanse的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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99
adhesive
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|
| n.粘合剂；adj.可粘着的，粘性的 | |
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100
linen
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|
| n.亚麻布，亚麻线，亚麻制品；adj.亚麻布制的，亚麻的 | |
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101
rummage
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|
| v./n.翻寻，仔细检查 | |
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102
dawdles
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| v.混（时间）( dawdle的第三人称单数 ) | |
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103
cuff
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| n.袖口；手铐；护腕；vt.用手铐铐；上袖口 | |
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104
bliss
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| n.狂喜，福佑，天赐的福 | |
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105
amputation
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| n.截肢 | |
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106
artery
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|
| n.干线，要道；动脉 | |
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107
scribble
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|
| v.潦草地书写，乱写，滥写；n.潦草的写法，潦草写成的东西，杂文 | |
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108
plunge
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|
| v.跳入，(使)投入，(使)陷入；猛冲 | |
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109
parlor
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| n.店铺，营业室；会客室，客厅 | |
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110
gallant
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| adj.英勇的，豪侠的；(向女人)献殷勤的 | |
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111
wrath
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| n.愤怒，愤慨，暴怒 | |
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112
incapable
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|
| adj.无能力的，不能做某事的 | |
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113
charade
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| n.用动作等表演文字意义的字谜游戏 | |
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114
recollect
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| v.回忆，想起，记起，忆起，记得 | |
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115
annihilate
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| v.使无效；毁灭；取消 | |
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116
aggravate
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| vt.加重(剧)，使恶化；激怒，使恼火 | |
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118
groan
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| vi./n.呻吟，抱怨；(发出)呻吟般的声音 | |
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119
incompetent
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|
| adj.无能力的，不能胜任的 | |
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120
immortal
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| adj.不朽的；永生的，不死的；神的 | |
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121
rambles
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| （无目的地）漫游( ramble的第三人称单数 )； （喻）漫谈； 扯淡； 长篇大论 | |
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122
relaxation
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| n.松弛，放松；休息；消遣；娱乐 | |
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123
gambolled
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| v.蹦跳，跳跃，嬉戏( gambol的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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124
brooks
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| n.小溪( brook的名词复数 ) | |
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125
brook
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| n.小河，溪；v.忍受，容让 | |
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126
scattered
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|
| adj.分散的，稀疏的；散步的；疏疏落落的 | |
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127
sedate
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| adj.沉着的，镇静的，安静的 | |
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128
palatial
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|
| adj.宫殿般的，宏伟的 | |
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129
housekeeper
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| n.管理家务的主妇，女管家 | |
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130
humble
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| adj.谦卑的，恭顺的；地位低下的；v.降低，贬低 | |
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131
patriots
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| 爱国者，爱国主义者( patriot的名词复数 ) | |
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132
ruffled
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| adj. 有褶饰边的, 起皱的 动词ruffle的过去式和过去分词 | |
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133
colossal
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| adj.异常的，庞大的 | |
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134
meditative
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| adj.沉思的，冥想的 | |
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135
slippers
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| n. 拖鞋 | |
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136
ponderous
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| adj.沉重的，笨重的，(文章)冗长的 | |
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137
robust
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| adj.强壮的，强健的，粗野的，需要体力的，浓的 | |
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138
affected
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| adj.不自然的，假装的 | |
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139
ornaments
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| n.装饰( ornament的名词复数 )；点缀；装饰品；首饰v.装饰，点缀，美化( ornament的第三人称单数 ) | |
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140
effigies
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| n.（人的）雕像，模拟像，肖像( effigy的名词复数 ) | |
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141
posterity
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| n.后裔，子孙，后代 | |
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142
crochet
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| n.钩针织物；v.用钩针编制 | |
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143
throng
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| n.人群，群众；v.拥挤，群集 | |
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144
emancipation
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| n.（从束缚、支配下）解放 | |
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145
granite
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| adj.花岗岩，花岗石 | |
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146
quarried
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| v.从采石场采得( quarry的过去式和过去分词 )；从（书本等中）努力发掘（资料等）；在采石场采石 | |
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147
cedars
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| 雪松，西洋杉( cedar的名词复数 ) | |
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148
rustled
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| v.发出沙沙的声音( rustle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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149
congregated
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| （使）集合，聚集( congregate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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150
cemetery
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| n.坟墓，墓地，坟场 | |
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151
murmurous
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| adj.低声的 | |
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152
confinement
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| n.幽禁，拘留，监禁；分娩；限制，局限 | |
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153
humbug
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| n.花招，谎话，欺骗 | |
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154
ravens
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| n.低质煤；渡鸦( raven的名词复数 ) | |
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155
relics
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| [pl.］n.遗物，遗迹，遗产；遗体，尸骸 | |
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156
dreary
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| adj.令人沮丧的，沉闷的，单调乏味的 | |
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157
meddle
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| v.干预，干涉，插手 | |
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158
solaced
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| v.安慰，慰藉( solace的过去分词 ) | |
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159
solace
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| n.安慰；v.使快乐；vt.安慰(物)，缓和 | |
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160
panorama
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| n.全景，全景画，全景摄影，全景照片[装置] | |
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161
wagons
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| n.四轮的运货马车( wagon的名词复数 )；铁路货车；小手推车 | |
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162
wagon
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| n.四轮马车，手推车，面包车；无盖运货列车 | |
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163
rumble
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| n.隆隆声；吵嚷；v.隆隆响；低沉地说 | |
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164
rattled
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| 慌乱的，恼火的 | |
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165
strings
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| n.弦 | |
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166
coffins
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| n.棺材( coffin的名词复数 )；使某人早亡[死，完蛋，垮台等]之物 | |
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167
picturesque
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| adj.美丽如画的，（语言）生动的，绘声绘色的 | |
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168
mammoth
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|
| n.长毛象；adj.长毛象似的，巨大的 | |
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169
scarlet
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| n.深红色，绯红色，红衣；adj.绯红色的 | |
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170
comely
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| adj.漂亮的，合宜的 | |
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171
bakers
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| n.面包师( baker的名词复数 )；面包店；面包店店主；十三 | |
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172
makers
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| n.制造者，制造商（maker的复数形式） | |
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173
gaily
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| adv.欢乐地，高兴地 | |
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174
prancing
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| v.（马）腾跃( prance的现在分词 ) | |
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175
fowls
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| 鸟( fowl的名词复数 )； 禽肉； 既不是这； 非驴非马 | |
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176
mule
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| n.骡子，杂种，执拗的人 | |
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177
mules
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| 骡( mule的名词复数 )； 拖鞋； 顽固的人； 越境运毒者 | |
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178
hopping
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| n. 跳跃 动词hop的现在分词形式 | |
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179
tassel
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| n.流苏，穗；v.抽穗， （玉米）长穗须 | |
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180
perked
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| （使）活跃( perk的过去式和过去分词 )； （使）增值； 使更有趣 | |
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181
prances
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| v.（马）腾跃( prance的第三人称单数 ) | |
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182
belle
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| n.靓女 | |
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183
tugging
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| n.牵引感v.用力拉，使劲拉，猛扯( tug的现在分词 ) | |
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184
laboring
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| n.劳动，操劳v.努力争取(for)( labor的现在分词 )；苦干；详细分析；（指引擎）缓慢而困难地运转 | |
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185
conscientious
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|
| adj.审慎正直的，认真的，本着良心的 | |
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186
delusion
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| n.谬见，欺骗，幻觉，迷惑 | |
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187
exertions
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| n.努力( exertion的名词复数 )；费力；（能力、权力等的）运用；行使 | |
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188
possessed
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| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
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189
erratic
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|
| adj.古怪的，反复无常的，不稳定的 | |
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190
plunges
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| n.跳进，投入vt.使投入，使插入，使陷入vi.投入，跳进，陷入v.颠簸( plunge的第三人称单数 )；暴跌；骤降；突降 | |
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191
lashing
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| n.鞭打；痛斥；大量；许多v.鞭打( lash的现在分词 )；煽动；紧系；怒斥 | |
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192
apparently
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| adv.显然地；表面上，似乎 | |
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193
flop
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| n.失败(者)，扑通一声；vi.笨重地行动，沉重地落下 | |
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194
demons
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| n.恶人( demon的名词复数 )；恶魔；精力过人的人；邪念 | |
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195
decided
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| adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的 | |
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196
leisurely
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|
| adj.悠闲的；从容的，慢慢的 | |
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197
bamboozled
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| v.欺骗，使迷惑( bamboozle的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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198
mortified
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| v.使受辱( mortify的过去式和过去分词 )；伤害（人的感情）；克制；抑制（肉体、情感等） | |
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199
stump
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| n.残株，烟蒂，讲演台；v.砍断，蹒跚而走 | |
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200
misery
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| n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦 | |
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201
jovial
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| adj.快乐的，好交际的 | |
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202
caressing
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| 爱抚的，表现爱情的，亲切的 | |
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203
turnip
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| n.萝卜，芜菁 | |
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204
gutter
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| n.沟，街沟，水槽，檐槽，贫民窟 | |
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205
begrudge
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| vt.吝啬，羡慕 | |
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206
preoccupied
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| adj.全神贯注的，入神的；被抢先占有的；心事重重的v.占据（某人）思想，使对…全神贯注，使专心于( preoccupy的过去式) | |
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207
sonorous
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|
| adj.响亮的，回响的；adv.圆润低沉地；感人地；n.感人，堂皇 | |
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208
promenaded
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| v.兜风( promenade的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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209
wont
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| adj.习惯于；v.习惯；n.习惯 | |
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210
plumed
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| 饰有羽毛的 | |
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211
maternal
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|
| adj.母亲的，母亲般的，母系的，母方的 | |
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212
providence
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| n.深谋远虑，天道，天意；远见；节约；上帝 | |
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213
worthy
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|
| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
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214
obsequious
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| adj.谄媚的，奉承的，顺从的 | |
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215
rampant
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| adj.(植物)蔓生的；狂暴的，无约束的 | |
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216
discreetly
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| ad.(言行)审慎地，慎重地 | |
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217
curb
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| n.场外证券市场，场外交易；vt.制止，抑制 | |
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218
saucy
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| adj.无礼的；俊俏的；活泼的 | |
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219
friendliness
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| n.友谊，亲切，亲密 | |
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220
Forsaken
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| adj. 被遗忘的, 被抛弃的 动词forsake的过去分词 | |
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221
dreariest
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| 使人闷闷不乐或沮丧的( dreary的最高级 )； 阴沉的； 令人厌烦的； 单调的 | |
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222
drudgery
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| n.苦工，重活，单调乏味的工作 | |
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223
romped
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| v.嬉笑玩闹( romp的过去式和过去分词 )；（尤指在赛跑或竞选等中）轻易获胜 | |
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224
accusations
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| n.指责( accusation的名词复数 )；指控；控告；（被告发、控告的）罪名 | |
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225
scoff
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| n.嘲笑，笑柄，愚弄；v.嘲笑，嘲弄，愚弄，狼吞虎咽 | |
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226
veins
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| n.纹理；矿脉( vein的名词复数 )；静脉；叶脉；纹理 | |
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227
doggedly
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| adv.顽强地，固执地 | |
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228
toddling
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| v.（幼儿等）东倒西歪地走( toddle的现在分词 )；蹒跚行走；溜达；散步 | |
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229
standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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230
sniff
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| vi.嗅…味道；抽鼻涕；对嗤之以鼻，蔑视 | |
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231
toad
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| n.蟾蜍，癞蛤蟆 | |
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232
poker
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| n.扑克；vt.烙制 | |
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233
perversity
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| n.任性；刚愎自用 | |
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234
ardor
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| n.热情，狂热 | |
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235
spout
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| v.喷出，涌出；滔滔不绝地讲；n.喷管；水柱 | |
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236
gruel
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| n.稀饭，粥 | |
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237
fanatic
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| n.狂热者，入迷者；adj.狂热入迷的 | |
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238
swarming
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| 密集( swarm的现在分词 )； 云集； 成群地移动； 蜜蜂或其他飞行昆虫成群地飞来飞去 | |
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239
tardily
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| adv.缓慢 | |
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240
electrified
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| v.使电气化( electrify的过去式和过去分词 )；使兴奋 | |
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241
benignly
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| adv.仁慈地，亲切地 | |
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242
omens
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| n.前兆，预兆( omen的名词复数 ) | |
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243
usher
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| n.带位员，招待员；vt.引导，护送；vi.做招待，担任引座员 | |
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244
cozy
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| adj.亲如手足的，密切的，暖和舒服的 | |
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245
eyebrows
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| 眉毛( eyebrow的名词复数 ) | |
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246
ominously
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| adv.恶兆地，不吉利地；预示地 | |
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247
hearth
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| n.壁炉炉床，壁炉地面 | |
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248
traitor
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| n.叛徒，卖国贼 | |
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249
tussle
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| n.&v.扭打，搏斗，争辩 | |
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250
wig
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| n.假发 | |
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251
mettle
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| n.勇气，精神 | |
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252
compensates
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| 补偿，报酬( compensate的第三人称单数 )； 给（某人）赔偿（或赔款） | |
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253
pangs
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| 突然的剧痛( pang的名词复数 )； 悲痛 | |
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254
recording
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| n.录音，记录 | |
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255
poetical
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| adj.似诗人的；诗一般的；韵文的；富有诗意的 | |
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demise
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| n.死亡；v.让渡，遗赠，转让 | |
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