Oh, if I had done nothing simply from laziness! Heavens, how I should have respected myself, then. I should have respected myself because I should at least have been capable of being lazy; there would at least have been one quality, as it were, positive in me, in which I could have believed myself. Question: What is he? Answer: A sluggard1; how very pleasant it would have been to hear that of oneself! It would mean that I was positively2 defined, it would mean that there was something to say about me. “Sluggard”— why, it is a calling and vocation3, it is a career. Do not jest, it is so. I should then be a member of the best club by right, and should find my occupation in continually respecting myself. I knew a gentleman who prided himself all his life on being a connoisseur4 of Lafitte. He considered this as his positive virtue5, and never doubted himself. He died, not simply with a tranquil6, but with a triumphant7 conscience, and he was quite right, too. Then I should have chosen a career for myself, I should have been a sluggard and a glutton8, not a simple one, but, for instance, one with sympathies for everything sublime9 and beautiful. How do you like that? I have long had visions of it. That “sublime and beautiful” weighs heavily on my mind at forty But that is at forty; then — oh, then it would have been different! I should have found for myself a form of activity in keeping with it, to be precise, drinking to the health of everything “sublime and beautiful.” I should have snatched at every opportunity to drop a tear into my glass and then to drain it to all that is “sublime and beautiful.” I should then have turned everything into the sublime and the beautiful; in the nastiest, unquestionable trash, I should have sought out the sublime and the beautiful. I should have exuded10 tears like a wet sponge. An artist, for instance, paints a picture worthy11 of Gay. At once I drink to the health of the artist who painted the picture worthy of Gay, because I love all that is “sublime and beautiful.” An author has written AS YOU WILL: at once I drink to the health of “anyone you will” because I love all that is “sublime and beautiful.”
I should claim respect for doing so. I should persecute12 anyone who would not show me respect. I should live at ease, I should die with dignity, why, it is charming, perfectly13 charming! And what a good round belly14 I should have grown, what a treble chin I should have established, what a ruby15 nose I should have coloured for myself, so that everyone would have said, looking at me: “Here is an asset! Here is something real and solid!” And, say what you like, it is very agreeable to hear such remarks about oneself in this negative age.

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1
sluggard
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n.懒人;adj.懒惰的 | |
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2
positively
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adv.明确地,断然,坚决地;实在,确实 | |
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3
vocation
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n.职业,行业 | |
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4
connoisseur
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n.鉴赏家,行家,内行 | |
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5
virtue
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n.德行,美德;贞操;优点;功效,效力 | |
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6
tranquil
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adj. 安静的, 宁静的, 稳定的, 不变的 | |
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7
triumphant
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adj.胜利的,成功的;狂欢的,喜悦的 | |
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8
glutton
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n.贪食者,好食者 | |
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9
sublime
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adj.崇高的,伟大的;极度的,不顾后果的 | |
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10
exuded
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v.缓慢流出,渗出,分泌出( exude的过去式和过去分词 );流露出对(某物)的神态或感情 | |
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11
worthy
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adj.(of)值得的,配得上的;有价值的 | |
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12
persecute
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vt.迫害,虐待;纠缠,骚扰 | |
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13
perfectly
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adv.完美地,无可非议地,彻底地 | |
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14
belly
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n.肚子,腹部;(像肚子一样)鼓起的部分,膛 | |
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15
ruby
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n.红宝石,红宝石色 | |
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